Subconsciously
Balance
It was another day. Arnold's dreams had centered around planes again. Nothing new.
And as Arnold finished his breakfast and headed out to school, inside his subconscious there was another much more interesting story to be told…
In Love Arnold was just rocking with his arms holding his legs tight to his chest, his eyes closed and mumbling small incoherencies to himself.
Affectionate Arnold was looking bored, as usual; just petting his hand in a slow, almost lethargic manner and trying to imagine it was Helga's.
Honest Arnold looked very indifferent as well, and he was just staring across the room at Dense Arnold pretending to fly a plane across the room. He ran around with his arms stuck out and would occasionally flap them a little as if he were a bird. Under normal circumstances this would be an amusing sight, but after seeing it for possibly the millionth time, it was pretty much equal with seeing grass on the ground, clouds in the sky, or birds doing their business on a statue. In fact, all it made Honest Arnold want to do was shake his head and sigh.
Dark Arnold, though, was just sitting with one leg up, his ankle resting on his knee, and his hand supporting his head as he scowled contemplatively. His mouth twitched every once in a while, and a frustrated sigh would escape him every few minutes. It was starting to become hard to ignore.
Finally, Honest Arnold decided enough was enough and looked over at Dark Arnold, raising an eyebrow. "Something wrong, Dark?"
Dark Arnold's scowling eyes shifted to Honest Arnold's. "Oh, other than the fact that our lives are hopeless pits of despair you ask?" He shifted his body so he was sitting normally and put his hands on his knees, his face going blank. "Oh, everything is just dandy." He smiled dryly.
Affectionate Arnold sighed out in frustration suddenly, and the two Arnolds' eyes went on him. "Why do you always have to be so pessimistic? Honest Arnold says in time Arnold WILL figure out we're here and use us more often. I don't understand why you can't just accept that and try to be patient."
"Hey, hey," Dark Arnold countered, his eyebrows furrowing, "I'm NOT pessimistic. No one in here is pessimistic. I'm just being realistic here. It's been six years and—"
"And Arnold is only nine," Honest Arnold cut in levelly, no special expression on his face. "He's just not mature enough to understand and deal with us yet."
That one got Dark Arnold to scowl. Hard. "Not mature enough to handle us…" he muttered to himself, shaking his head. "I don't believe that one for a second. At five he was already building model planes and trains and saying words like 'gigantic,' 'humongous,' and 'combat.' If that's not mature then I don't know what—"
"I said maturity, not intelligence. They're two different things," Honest Arnold said, once again in his normal, level tone.
Dark Arnold just looked away and crossed his arms over his chest.
"I don't understand why we always listen to you," Affectionate Arnold added in now, frowning. "All you ever do is talk about how we're doomed. Only every once in a while do you revert back to your 'Let's do it for Helga!' way of thinking. If we should be following anyone, I think it should be Honest Arnold." He nodded his head toward him.
Honest Arnold just blinked and blushed.
Dark Arnold looked less than pleased, though. In fact, he looked just plain angry. He sat up, his shoulders tense, and stated in an obviously forced level tone with his hands gripping tight to the bottom of his chair, knuckles turning white, "I'm sorry if my leading you has made you feel regretful…"
"Dark Arnold feels the natural need to be leading the way," Honest Arnold stated unexpectedly, raising a hand up as he explained. "It's just who he is. Plus he has a natural charm about him that makes people want to follow him. It's not his fault."
"You can't possibly think we should continue following him," Affectionate Arnold said with wide eyes at his assumed implications.
Honest Arnold looked down a moment… and then back up, his mind more than made up. "Well, we've gone this far, and he's never led us wrong. I don't see any reason why not to."
"Thank you, Honest," Dark Arnold said then, looking very pleased.
"Still—" Affectionate Arnold tried again.
"Shhh…" In Love Arnold piped up, opening his eyes blankly, still rocking. "You're making me feel stressed. Plus, Arnold's talking to Helga now and I'm trying to watch. If my heart rate goes any higher I might die."
"Helga?" Dark Arnold asked, immediately straightening up. "He's talking to her?"
In Love Arnold nodded, stopping in his rocking a moment. "She dropped her pencil and told him to pick it up and now they're fighting."
"In class?"
"In the hallway." In Love Arnold resumed his rocking then, and closed his eyes to watch more.
The other three Arnolds did the same and closed their eyes, watching the scene unfold…
"I gave you back your pencil, Helga," Arnold said in annoyance, closing his locker to turn to her fully, scowling slightly no matter how much he tried to repress it.
Helga rolled her eyes, holding the pencil away from her body between two fingers, as if it smelled badly or something. "Yeah, but you touched it! Now it's contaminated with your icky football headed germs!"
"Helga…" Arnold said, as patiently as he could, but looking very annoyed nonetheless. "How could I have given you your pencil back without touching it?"
"You could have used your sleeve!"
"Fine," he said dismissively, starting to walk away. "Then I'll do that next time."
"Hey!" She grabbed his arm back and pulled him back over to her, holding the pencil back out to him. "I can't take the pencil now! It's disgusting! You take it!"
"Ewww…" Arnold twisted his face, taking a step back from the pencil. "Helga, it has your teeth marks all over it."
"So?"
"I'm not taking your pencil, Helga."
"Fine! Then throw it away!"
"You do it!"
"You're closer!'
"It's your pencil!"
"That you turned to trash!"
"Fine." Arnold's face turned hard and he took the pencil in between two fingers by the eraser and marched stiffly over to the trashcan, and threw it in. "There!" He tapped his foot, crossing his arms. "Heppy, Helga?"
"I'm never happy when I'm around you," she grumbled angrily, pushing past him on her way to class.
Arnold just sighed out in frustration and walked away as well, in the opposite direction as her.
The Arnolds in his subconscious all opened their eyes as the scene finished and…
Honest Arnold just slapped his forehead.
Affectionate Arnold mourned over not getting to brush against her hand like he usually did.
Dark Arnold looked a cross between angry and amused. Angry at Arnold and amused at Helga's antics.
And In Love Arnold was shaking violently and looked very dizzy.
And across the room Dense Arnold was just pacing around, mumbling angry words to himself, undoubtedly being tuned in by Arnold himself at the moment as he paced back and forth in the bathroom in his fluster.
Dark Arnold sighed out in satisfaction and leaned back, crossing his legs and arms, smirking. "Well, there went our daily dose of Helga. And did he admit to loving her? No. Did he kiss her or hug her? No. Did he grab her and tell her she looked heavenly today? NO." He sighed, still smirking. "Another day wasted. And Love over there is having a seizure practically." He finally let the smirk fall, revealing a scowling, dry expression. "Fantastic."
In Love Arnold just nodded his head shakily, nearly hyperventilating over in his corner.
Affectionate Arnold on the other hand looked very annoyed with Dark Arnold's words. "Dark, I'm getting sick and tired of you." He scowled this time, something very rare for Affectionate Arnold.
Dark Arnold glanced over at him listlessly. "You deal with this kind of stuff with Helga every day and think it's cute but coming from me it's just so frustrating?"
"At least Helga has the occasional bouts of kindness and sweetness leveling it out, plus she's cute and a girl." Affectionate Arnold frowned deeper. "But with you it's just constant… constant—"
"Darkness?" Dark Arnold smirked tiredly. "How am I supposed to respond to that? I'm sorry?"
"I-I like Dark Arnold…" In Love Arnold spoke up quietly, still shaking slightly, though thankfully he'd managed to get his breathing under control.
Affectionate Arnold glanced over at him, still with that frown, and an incredulous look in his eyes. "Why? All he ever does is crush your hopes. I mean, look at you! You're shaking! You hardly ever say anything!"
"That's why I like him…" In Love Arnold responded, his small voice rising only slightly. He looked determined to get his thoughts out in the open for once. "He can say the things I'd pass out over if I said them. H-He gives me courage. H-He… um…"
"He gives him his boldness," Honest Arnold elaborated, smiling knowingly.
"Exactly." In Love Arnold smiled. "I mean, maybe he's right. Maybe Arnold won't ever discover I'm here. Maybe I'll just be pushed down back here forever. But with Dark Arnold here, despite his words, I think there's a better chance that I will be discovered. He defends me from Dense Arnold. He tells me stories at night about all the things we'll do with Helga when we are discovered. He's my best friend. We go hand in hand down here. And so do you, Affectionate Arnold. Dark Arnold knows how to walk and talk, but you know how to coo and kiss, and without Honest Arnold combating Dense Arnold, we all might never be discovered. Let's face it. We all need each other."
"If we don't stick together Arnold will never realize he loves Helga and he'll never be fully honest with himself about anything when it comes to her for the rest of his life," Honest Arnold stated solemnly.
That got them all dead quiet in an instant and caused them all to stiffen at the notion.
Dark Arnold cleared his throat after a minute and glanced over at Affectionate Arnold out of the corner of his eye. "Do you… have anymore complaints?"
Affectionate Arnold looked up at him sadly and shook his head. "No…"
"I-I'm…" Dark Arnold winced, before his face broke out to some vulnerability and he sighed, slumping. "I'm sorry if I seem… pessimistic sometimes. I'm just… a little depressed. But I shouldn't be trying to drag you all into that, too. You have your own problems."
"No," Affectionate Arnold objected, surprising Dark Arnold. "Your problems are our problems." He smiled apologetically, some sheepishness coming to his eyes. "It's… good to share your feelings with us. I mean, Arnold hasn't been facing up to his feelings for six years now, or talking about them to ANYONE, and look where he is…"
A flash of Arnold's angry, flustered pacing in the bathroom, his hands balled up into fists, and his face twisted in frustration passed over their eyes and they shook their heads with a small shiver.
"Yeah…" In Love Arnold spoke up again once the vision passed, wiping his sweaty hands off on his jeans with a small smile. "Don't hesitate to speak your thoughts to us. We're all in the same boat here."
Dark Arnold just… smiled, his eyes softer than usual for him as he said, "Okay…" His eyes went harder again, though, and he said determinedly, "But I WILL try to think more…" he twisted his face, "optimistically…" He shook his head a little then and straightened up in his seat, smoothing back his hair with one hand as he smirked a little again. "But don't expect much. Still have to maintain my dark persona over here after all. The last thing we need is two Optimistic Arnolds. Then Arnold might turn into the next Eugene or something." He laughed a little, but it was clear he was a bit disgusted with the possibility.
Honest Arnold spoke up this time, smiling, "We expect nothing less of you, Dark."
Dark Arnold smiled smirkingly and sat back in his seat, his arms crossing themselves over his chest once more. "Thanks, guys."
There was a moment of silence as they all let their conversation settle in the air, before a more peaceful silence came over them… In Love Arnold sighed airily and hugged himself, Affectionate Arnold resumed petting his hand, only this time with a small smile, and Honest Arnold just smiled in knowing that the balance in their little group had once more been restored.
"So…" Dark Arnold said after a few seconds, looking to be in a much better mood than he was before. His eyes sparkled mischievously and they all knew what he was going to say before he said it. "Anyone up for the Truth game today?"