Hey guys! Sorry for the long waiting, but I was really busy with school and I moved into a bigger flat with two of my friends, so it was a bit stressful. But now I have two weeks winter holidays so I try to update a bit more. I know the last chapters are a bit too dramtically, this one is no exception, but I promise it will be better, after that there is only one with really rough and dramtically scenes and then I think there will be more fluff, so please have a little pacience. Oh and thanks a lot for the reviews, please keep it up!
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The whole week Haley tried to speak to Nathan, but he avoided her every time. There was no real chance to talk to him alone, because either he was with Rachel and she made it impossible to speak to him or when he was finally alone he immediately walked past Haley and didn't speak to her. Not one single word. Haley was so depressed about the whole situation. She really wanted to speak to him, but he wouldn't allow her to. It made her sad, because to her it seemed that Nathan hated her so much because she left, but ultimately it was the best for him, but for Haley it was horrible. Of course the days she was on tour were really great, but most of the tour consisted of her sitting in her dressing room and crying, but nobody realized that.
Haley sat by herself in the tutor center and flipped through a calculus book. At the beginning of the week she was the center of attention. Everybody was looking at her and pointing at her, like she was a piece of meat in the window of a butcher shop. Some people spoke to her about the tour and told her that they were really impressed by that, but most of the people, especially girls, only teased her. Now, it was Friday and no one looked at her anymore. Now Haley was nobody special, she was just Haley, just Haley James Scott the Tutor girl.
"Guess who?" A voice suddenly sing-songed behind Haley and covered her eyes with her hands. "Hey Brooke, what's going on?" Haley asked without hesitation. "How do you always know that it's me?" Brooke pouted and took a seat next to Haley. "Maybe I'm a lucky guesser," Haley said, aware that what she said wasn't true. She would be able to identify Brooke out of thousands of people.
Brooke took the book away from Haley and shut it. "Hey, I was reading that!" Haley spoke disapprovingly when Brooke took the book away. "Right you were reading that! Listen tonight there's a party at someone's beach house and you have to come with me." Haley rolled her eyes.
"No Haley, don't do this! Don't roll your eyes in such a way; I know exactly what that means. You will come with me and you will have fun with me okay?" Brooke declared without letting Haley interrupt her. "Brooke I don't want to do that and I'm not sure if I can do that. I mean, Nathan and Rachel will be there. I can't do this. Sorry Brooke." Haley apologized and looked at Brooke.
"Haley I know it wasn't a really easy week for you, I mean having Nathan avoiding you, seeing him with Rachel-" "Oh, thanks for the reminders." Haley enunciated hypocritically and stood up. "Haley, I'm sorry, but please come with me. I mean maybe, it's your chance to speak with Nathan. See, I can try to abstract Rachel while you talk with Nathan. What do you think?" Brooke pleaded.
Haley wasn't really sure, but her baby was much more. The baby gave Haley a short kick and it seemed to mean that she better listen to what Brooke was saying. "Hey! Okay, okay!" Haley spoke loudly and Brooke looked at her friend questioningly. "Well, I think the baby thinks like you Brooke. It kicked." Haley announced, but not really sure about this whole idea. Brooke immediately reached out to Haley and put her hand on Haley's baby belly. "Hey little Scott, I know you will be a smart kid. Always agreeing with what Auntie Brooke is saying." Brooke squealed cheerfully. "Okay if the two of you push me so much..." Haley said not really aware of the words she was saying right now. Brooke nodded, put her hands on her hips and grinned. "Well, no one can resist my words." Brooke squealed. When she looked at Haley she scrunched up her mouth. "But first I need to take you on an emergency shopping trip."
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"Haley come out!" Brooke stressed while pacing in front of the door. "No way Brooke! I don't feel comfortable in this. It shows everything," Haley replied and stuck her head out of the changing area. "Haley come on. I'm sure you look great in it and by the way it's supposed to show everything. I mean do you want to wear those baggy shirts and those ugly pants all throughout your pregnancy? I mean, look around in this shop there are so many cute dresses and shirts and stuff like that. I think, no I know, it fits you perfectly. So come out or I'll have to force you out!" Brooke warned and pulled Haley out of the changing area.
"Haley you look amazing. I really don't know what your problem is," Brooke swore. Haley looked down at herself. Haley was wearing a tartan patterned green baby doll shirt which reached the middle of her thighs and under the shirt she was wearing olive-green leggings. The cloths flattered her baby belly perfectly and it made her look even more beautiful.
"Brooke, that's all well and good and actually I have to say it looks really nice, but I can't wear this and furthermore look at the price. I don't have that much money," Haley said a bit disapprovingly. "Don't worry about the price, I want to buy it for you and don't you dare say anything about that. Okay? You look amazing in this and you have to wear it tonight," Brooke said urgently. Haley could only nod, because you couldn't cope with Brooke Davis when she had her mind made up like this. Brooke pushed Haley back into the cabin and ordered her to stay there, changing her clothes while Brooke searched for new stuff.
"Well I think you need some more pairs of pants and plenty of shirts and some more baby doll shirts, because they look really great on you." Brooke announced while diving through the batches of pregnancy clothes. Haley sighed. She was wondering how long she was supposed to try on clothes. She stuck her head through the curtain again in search of Brooke's brown hair. "Brooke I'm tired of-" But Haley abruptly cut off her words and closed the curtain when she saw two well known persons in the shop. "Oh I can't believe that some of these clothes exist for pregnant women. They are so cute." Brooke spoke more to herself than to Haley.
"Well, well Brookie. Is there something you want to tell me?" A voice suddenly sounded behind Brooke. She immediately turned around and faced her cousin and Nathan. "Rachel, Nathan, what are you doing here?" Brooke spoke with a loud voice to tip Haley off of the appearance of the two persons that stood in the store. "You don't have to shout Brookie, we aren't that old. Well, we wanted to get some beer before the big party tonight, I mean pre-partying, you understand. But I think I have to ask you what are YOU doing here? You aren't pregnant, are you?" Rachel announced. Brooke walked with the big batch of clothes in her arms to the changing area where Haley was hiding herself from the public. "No, hell no, I'm not pregnant. I'm here with Ha- I mean Holly, my friend Holly. She is pregnant and needed some clothes so I accompanied her." Brooke explained to them why she was in a pregnancy clothes shop. "Thank god, I really thought you were pregnant, but I mean who is stupid enough to get pregnant while in High School? What do you think Nate?" Rachel annotated. "Yeah right, who is that stupid? Their life is over when that happens. Like some other things end your life." Nathan said a bit absent-minded.
Haley breathed heavily. She couldn't believe what she was hearing right now from her own husband. Did this statement mean that he didn't want a baby and that marriage ends your life, too? What if he is like Dan and sends her away? Haley slide down the side of the wall of the changing room and covered her face with her hands.
"Umm, well did you want to stay or go? It isn't like I don't want you here, but Holly is really shy around other people so…?" Brooke declared and looked at the two of them. "Oh we won't disturb you any longer, so I'll see you tonight?" Rachel asked. Brooke only nodded and waited for them vanish as soon as possible. Rachel smirked at her cousin and then turned around ready to go. Nathan turned around, but was held back by Brooke. "Nathan have you spoken to Haley this week? I mean, she really wants to speak to you, but you have been avoiding her. Nathan you owe her that." Brooke said.
"Do I? She never called me the whole time she was on tour and why should I talk to her now? Brooke she left me, she left me and never phoned and now she is back and states that everything will be okay, but it won't be so easy," Nathan spoke with a hint of hurt in his voice.
"Do you really think she doesn't know that? Haley isn't dumb, but she is hurt, hurt by you more than you were hurt by her. And don't tell me it isn't worse. She sees you everyday with Rachel, laughing, being close and stuff like that? I mean, she really thinks you don't love her anymore. So why don't you talk to her and say to her that you still do love her, or don't you?" Brooke announced and with every word she became louder. She didn't notice that herself, but it was true. At this moment she was so mad with Nathan, especially since she knew that Haley was only a few steps away from the two of them.
"Do you really think that I don't love her? Does Haley really think that, too? Well, if you both think that than you don't know me. I still do love Haley and I always will. She is the love of my life even though I realized that we were slowly tearing apart. But you don't know how hurt I have been the last couple months. Everyday I sat in our apartment, knowing that Haley would not walk through the door and that she won't be lying next to me at night. It hurts Brooke, it really does. And now seeing her everyday at school hurts only more, but at this time I can't be near her, because I'm scared that she might leave me again, okay? I can't trust her and I don't know if I can do this again." Nathan declared urgently and then ran his hand through his raven hair. "Okay I got to go, I'll see you tonight." With these words Nathan left the shop.
Brooke sighed and removed a piece of her brown hair from her face. She couldn't believe that Nathan was such a stubborn jerk. Why couldn't he just go to Haley and talk to her. It wasn't that difficult and it was not a good situation for both of them to be in. She could hit Nathan for acting like he did just a few moments ago. Brooke really hoped that tonight things would become clearer.
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"So here we are!" Lucas announced when he stopped the car in front of the huge white beach house. Haley was sitting in the back seat of Lucas' car and stared out at the lighted beach house. After Nathan and Rachel left the shop Haley felt terrible. She didn't hear most of Brooke's and Nathan's conversation, but when Brooke's voice turned louder with every word, Haley felt that it wasn't a really good conversation. After that Haley didn't want to shop anymore and Brooke took her home. They decided that they would meet each other at the party, so Haley could drove with Lucas and Peyton.
The party was already going on when they arrived and people streamed in and out of the house. She was sure that Brooke was already there. "Haley are you ready?" Peyton asked facing Haley. The girl looked into the green eyes of her friend and shrugged her shoulders. She wasn't sure if she was ready. She looked down at herself and doubted that she was ready in that outfit. She was wearing the green tartan patterned baby doll shirt which Brooke bought her in the shop. In this outfit everybody could see that she was pregnant and that was actually the last thing she wanted. She wasn't ready for this, she hadn't even told Nathan about the baby. How could she step into a crowded house were everybody would be gazing at her? She promised Brooke that she would wear it, but she wasn't strong enough to get through this.
Meanwhile, Lucas and Peyton got out of the car and Lucas opened the backdoor of his car to help Haley out. "Haley come on! You are strong. You can do it." Lucas assured his best friend and stretched out his hand so that Haley could take it. Haley hesitated for one last moment, but then she nodded. Yes she could do it. She could go to Nathan and finally speak to him. But then she looked down at herself and immediately the insecurity came over her again. "Maybe, but I can't do this in this outfit. Luke is it possible that you could give me your sweatshirt, please?" Lucas gave Peyton a questioning look, but the curly blonde only nodded. She could really understand Haley. Of course she was strong, but showing that she was pregnant in front of almost the entire senior class was a bit too much. Lucas pulled off his sweater and handed it to Haley. She quickly put it on and gave Lucas a thankful look. Lucas smiled at her and offered Haley his arm. Haley really appreciated that and then the three of them entered the house.
The party was actively going on. People were dancing, most were already drunk and others were making out in a corner of one of the rooms. Lucas, Peyton and Haley shoved themselves through the crowded rooms until they discovered Mouth and Skillz standing in the kitchen. "Hey you two! How's it going?" Lucas announced as he and the two guys' bumped fists and then Skillz and Mouth greeted the two girls. "Alright, buddy. The party is okay. At first it wasn't that good but than Rachel 'warmed it up' a little bit," Skillz told them. Haley immediately rolled her eyes angrily by hearing Rachel's name.
"What did she do?" Peyton asked curiously, of course she expected nothing good. "Umm well, she kind of did a table dance and it was really ho…"Mouth wanted to explain but was cut off by Skillz when he bumped his elbow roughly into his rips. "Ow!" Haley smiled bitterly. "It's okay Skillz, but it is what it is," Haley said. She knew that Rachel wasn't bad-looking and Skillz cut Mouth off only because of sympathy, but it didn't really help. Sure everybody was staring at her while she did this "table dance", but she really hoped that Nathan wasn't one of them.
She then was draw out of her thoughts when she heard Brookes voice. "Hey Tutor Girl over here!"
"Excuse me for one moment guys," Haley said and forced her way to Brooke. Brooke then greeted her with a hug, but instantly looked down at her with her eyebrows narrowed. "You aren't serious, are you tutor girl? What did we agree upon?"
"I know Brooke, but please don't be mad at me, I couldn't do it. I couldn't show up in this outfit in front of the entire senior class knowing that Nathan doesn't even know." Brooke put an arm around Haley and rubbed her arm trying to comfort her. "I'm not mad; of course I understand and I don't want to pressure you. But at least you wore this gorgeous outfit under this, umm ew!" Brooke announced. Haley gave her a small smile. "Hey Haley, I thought you might want something to drink, of course nonalcoholic!" Haley heard Luke suddenly say behind her. She smiled in appreciation and took the cup from her friend. Haley noticed the awkward moment between her friends and looked at Brooke with a pleading look. Brooke sighed but then threw a "Hey" their way. Haley sipped on her cup and only rolled her eyes.
"You know that was really cheap what you did?" Nathan said while he and Rachel shoved themselves through the rooms. "What? I thought everyone was enthusiastic! I'm really disappointed that you didn't like it," Rachel responded. "Whatever," Nathan said and took a sip from his beer. He suddenly bumped against Rachel who stopped immediately in front of him. " What's the matter now?"
"Oh umm, I just sighted Brooke and your ex-wife. Come on let's go and say hello." Rachel said while giving him a smirk. She wanted to rush over to them, but she was stopped when she felt a rough grip around her arm. "First of all, Haley is still my wife and second don't you dare insult her! Do you understand me?" Nathan stated urgently. Rachel only raised her hands showing that she had nothing on her mind, but Nathan didn't trust her. He knew her very well and Rachel didn't miss any chance to pick on Haley, no matter if she were around or not. Nathan maybe was mad at her, but this didn't give Rachel any right to insult her in anyway. The last thing Nathan realized was that Rachel had pulled him to the little group. When he saw Haley knots instantly built in his stomach. Her blonde hair was wavy and was falling down her shoulders, exactly how he loved it and her perfect face was discreetly covered with a little bit of make-up. He had the desire to only caress her face and give her beautiful lips a soft kiss. But his ego told him a whole other story.
"Hey Brookie, umm hey Holly and your little friends," Nathan heard Rachel say with a bittersweet voice.
Haley tried to hold herself back and not jump at the bimbo's throat.
"Hey Rachel and will you finally get it into your brain that it's Haley?" Brooke said only tightening her comforting embrace. "Whatever, so I hope you have been enjoying the party like we have been, right Nathan?" Rachel stated while putting a hand on his chest.
Nathan felt really uncomfortable with her hand on his chest, especially with knowing that Haley was seeing everything and was sure to get the wrong idea, but somehow he didn't do anything about it. "How's your bruise little brother?" Lucas asked suddenly really seriously. Haley looked up at Lucas when she heard his words. She noticed that Nathan had a bruise like Lucas had one, but she didn't expect that Lucas was the reason for it. "Better. Looks like yours is better, too." Nathan tried to have some conversation with him. He didn't want to constantly look at Haley, so he tried to do something else.
"Oh yeah much better, I took care of that," Rachel declared with a sweet smile on her lips. "You better take care of yourself, before I hit you and you get one," Peyton said under her breath. "Oh Peyton did you say something? By the way; I didn't expect you to be here. I thought you were in your depressive room, drawing some of your horrible scribbles that you call art." Peyton was about to jump Rachel's throat, but Lucas held her back. Haley was trying to avoid looking at Nathan the whole time, but she snapped out of it when she heard Rachel insult her friend. "Will you shut up you bitch? You don't even know what art is. So watch what you are saying, otherwise you will quickly see a palette of blue and violet shades on your face," Haley scolded.
Nathan looked up and stared into Haley's eyes for the first time since they bumped into each other at school the other day. Her eyes were full of fire and seriousness. That's my wife. He thought but suddenly a voice inside his head said, yeah which left you and didn't call. Yes this little voice was right and for some stupid reason he cared about what the voice said, so he tore his look away from Haley.
All her friends were staring at Haley, when she looked around. She thought that she could see Nathan staring at her too, but instantly he tore his eyes away from her. Why the hell, can't he look at me or speak to me either? "Don't make me laugh little girl. As if you could beat me. I mean usually little, fat and tiny headed girls couldn't do that. I mean before you could beat me, but I'm going to be on my way now. Speaking of way, you should make your way through a clothing shop or at least through a discounted shop you look a little homeless," Rachel countered.
Promptly Haley's eyes filled with tears. She wouldn't cry in front of her friends, Nathan or especially in front of Rachel. She wouldn't let her win. She didn't even know why she was starting to cry. She didn't think it was because of what Rachel said. She didn't care about her, while maybe a little bit. Maybe it was because of the hormones, but she thought mostly it was the fact that Nathan didn't say anything to defend her. Maybe she was asking too much, but she was still his wife. The next thing Haley knew was that the rest of her drink landed directly in Rachel's face. Then Haley only formed a "sorry guys" to her friends and left the group alone.
Immediately Brooke, Lucas and Peyton burst out laughing and a few people around them who followed the whole scenario joined in. Rachel stood there in full shock. The orange juice that was in Haley's cup before was now all over her. Her red hair was wet and her mascara was pouring down her face a bit. "Ew, that little bitch! I will put her fatty face into…"
"Shut up Rachel, shut your selfish, skanky, little mouth! It was time that something like that happened. You deserved it! You may be my cousin, but you are really a bitch and I'm not proud of being the cousin to a bitch." Brooke shouted to Rachel before she gave her attention to Nathan. "And you Mister, it's about time that you opened your damn mouth and I mean in front of your wife! So either you get your damn ass out of this room and follow Haley or I promise you, I will drag you through hell and back!" Brooke stated seriously. Rachel only squealed angrily and left the group. Nathan, however, stood there completely frozen.
He didn't know how he could respond after that clear statement made by Brooke. He didn't know that Brooke Davis could be so frightening. "You heard what the girl said Nathan! Get your ass to your wife and finally speak to her. Damn, it couldn't be that hard to at least talk to her!" Peyton added furiously. Nathan then raised his hands in surrender. "Fine," was the only word he could say before he left the three of them. Peyton and Lucas then smiled into Brooke's direction. "Well, who expected Brooke Davis to be such a hurricane? Well done girlie. But you better watch out what your relatives are doing the next time." Peyton praised Brooke. "I definitely will." Brooke only laughed.
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Haley was sitting at the beach trying to dry her tears, but the tears wouldn't stop pouring down. She was proud that she did all that stuff in front of Rachel, but she was disappointed that Nathan didn't do anything in her defense. He only stood their not able to look at her, or say anything to her, not even hello. This is all so screwed, Haley thought while running the sleeve of her sweater over her face.
"May I join you?" A voice suddenly sounded behind her. Haley turned around and saw Nathan standing there. "Wow, the stone wall finally is speaking to me! What a pleasure." Haley said sarcastically and turned her face back to the ocean. "Don't be like this Hales. You have no right to be mad with me." Nathan said while sitting next to her. However, Haley immediately moved herself a bit away from Nathan.
"Don't you 'Hales' me Nathan! And why do I have no right to be mad with you? You are with that bitch all the time. Don't you think about me for a second or about how I feel?" "What? How can you think that I'm not thinking about you? I'm thinking of you all the time since you left me, Haley! You walked away from me and I didn't know way. All that you left was that stupid note. So you now have the chance to talk to me, when I'm finally ready for this!" Nathan spoke while his voice slowly rose.
Haley couldn't believe what she was hearing. Now that he finally is ready for this? "You were the one who walked out of the apartment and I didn't have any chance to explain everything to you! There was so much I wanted to say to you that night, but you didn't listen to me! And you were the one who said that if I left then we were done!" Haley yelled with a thick voice. The tears were still pouring down her cheeks. "Oh so it's my fault that you left, right? Do you want to say that? You want to blame me for what you've done?" Nathan said and stood up upset. "I didn't say that Nathan. You don't know how often I dialed your number in the last two months so I could explain everything and apologize for everything, but I couldn't. I was so scared about your reaction and that you wouldn't understand me!" Haley said, her voice being really weak now. She thought that every second her voice would break.
"So try me know! Maybe I will understand it. Tell me!" Nathan spoke while looking into Haley's eyes which were filled with tears. It breaks his heart seeing her like this, but he couldn't simply switch to normalcy and pull her into his arms. "I – I can't! I can't tell you, you wouldn't understand," Haley excused herself. Nathan smiled bitterly. "I don't need this conversation Haley. I don't need your lame excuses!" Nathan said and then turned around to walk away from her.
"Just tell me you don't need me, right? Yeah you have Rachel now. She cares about you and your desires, right?" Nathan abruptly turned around to face Haley again. He didn't really know what the meaning of her words were. "What? What do you mean by those words?" "I want to say that it seems that you don't love me anymore. I mean you quickly found a new one who has been sleeping with you for the last two months. Rachel told me last weekend. God I was so dumb!" Haley answered while sobbing a little bit.
Nathan sighed heavily. Did she know about the day he was drunk? No otherwise she would have mentioned it or not?
"What I don't slept with Rachel! I would never do that! She means nothing to me. She was there to take away my pain about you leaving, but I never slept with her. I can't believe that you would think that I'd be doing a thing like that!"
Haley suddenly looked up. He didn't sleep with Rachel? He really didn't sleep with her! Haley felt like someone refreshed her heart. She wanted to say something but Nathan tore away from her and finally started walking away, but then he stopped once again.
"I still do love you Haley and I always will. It's only, I can't trust you for leaving here. But I really hope you proof me wrong." Nathan nearly whispered and his last sentence was almost unclear, but it was loud enough so Haley could hear it.
Nathan really battled with himself for not turning around again and pulling her into his arms. He was really hurt, but he wished, after their conversation that they might be able to start over again. He knew they couldn't continue where they stopped, but maybe they could start new, only the two of them.
Nathan was finally able to walk away from her and back into the beach house. He really needed a drink or more after this conversation.
Haley still sat their completely frozen. Her conversation with Nathan wasn't really what she wanted it to be, but at least it was a start. She laid her hand on her belly and placed her gaze also on her belly. "Don't worry. I'll fix this mess with Daddy. I promise!"