A/N: i am so sorry for the delay. i've been working on this chapter for what feels like forever - i only had a little bit of time here and there to work on it, so i apologize!

please please please forgive me, and please review!

Your time is running out
You should have known better
Only you can save you now
But you won't remember
So who's going to save you now?

"God Wears Gucci" - blessthefall

Jacob did his best to prepare himself before entering her room – he had seen her in the hospital before, after the accident, hooked up to tubes and wires, her pale skin all bruised and torn from the flying glass and crushed metal. But when his eyes took in the sight before him, it took every ounce of his self control to keep from killing someone right then and there.

She looked fragile, brittle, vulnerable, as if Victoria hadn't just drained her of most of her blood, but of her very life force. Her skin appeared paper thin, waxy, almost translucent. Her eyes were rimmed in deep circles, as if the leech had also used her face as a punching bag. Her hair was thin, dirty and stuck in patches to her head. Thankfully, they had dressed her in a hospital gown and covered her with a blanket, but Jacob knew that long scratches traced every groove of her lower limbs. His gaze fell to the thick gauze bandages that had been wrapped around her wrists and he fought back the urge to gag as he thought of Victoria sinking her long claws into Bella's skin. It sickened him to know that the leech had tortured her for the several days it had taken him and Edward to find her.

It angered him to think that if they had only gotten their shit together sooner, they might have found her days ago, that she wouldn't have had to endure this agony. But what enraged him more was the fact that it was her involvement with Edward that had started this whole mess. If the Cullens had just left her alone, she would have loved him. They had been friends for most of their lives, and if this supernatural shit hadn't gotten in the way, life would have brought them together anyway.

He watched the ventilator pump air into her lungs and the IV as it slowly dripped in the blood and medication her damaged body so badly needed. Jacob felt his skin tremble with the desire to touch her, hold her, take all the pain away, but he knew now that he had done all that he could.

Jacob allowed his large feet to carry him to her bedside, and he sank heavily into the closest chair. His hand reached out before he could stop it, but he paused within millimeters of her skin. He was afraid of her delicate body, terrified that he might only hurt her more.

"It's ok to touch her, Jacob," came Edward's silky smooth voice, and it made Jacob flinch involuntarily. He yanked his hand backwards and forced it into his pants pocket. He couldn't deny the urge to caress her skin with his fingertips, but he also realized that he needed to keep his distance.

"I'll wait," was Jacob's cold reply. "But I'll be here when the time comes." Edward hesitated, and Jacob could practically feel the vampire weigh his options. He heard Edward's teeth open, then snap together again. When he heard Edward open and close his mouth a second time, Jacob snarled in frustration and whipped his head around. "What do you want, now, Cullen?"

"I'm sorry," Edward said apologetically. "If you would like, I can leave you alone with her for awhile." Jacob nodded stiffly. "I will be back later, but I am sure that Charlie will be here very shortly, so you are warned."

Jacob nodded again, and then sighed in relief as he heard the door open and shut. He took a deep breath, thankful to be breathing air that was not tainted with the stench of vampire, but as he leaned closer to Bella, he realized her skin still held the odor faintly. He wrinkled his nose, but did not move away.

His eyes drifted back down to her hands, and the tingling desire to hold her returned to his fingertips. He clenched his hands into fists in his pockets and instead pulled the chair closer to her bed.

Jacob watched her chest move up and down in a rhythmic manner, and he closed his eyes, listening to the faint thudding of her heart. It was weak, he knew, because it was not the strong sound he was so used to hearing. But it was still there, and he felt thankful for that.

Opening his eyes again, he was surprised by the overwhelming urge to talk to her. He turned around to see if anyone else was in the room, feeling slightly strange for talking to someone that obviously could not hear him, but he figured it couldn't hurt. He had things he needed to tell her, and he doubted if he would be able to get everything off his chest when she awoke. "Bella…" he whispered softly. "I don't think that you can hear me… but…. I wanted you to know that I'm here. You're here. In the hospital. You're safe now, I promise."

He looked around again to ensure they were alone before continuing. "Victoria and her partner are dead… Edward and I… took care of it." He blew out his breath, almost chuckling. "How strange, right? Edward and me, working together." But then his eyes narrowed and he shook his head. "It wasn't by choice, trust me. And it wasn't easy either. But…" He struggled to find the right words. "But you're safe, and that's all that matters."

Settling back into his seat, Jacob continued to talk. "I don't know what I would have done if Victoria had…" He swallowed thickly, coughing against the words he knew that he had to say. "You know what I mean. Anyway…. " His voice trailed off again and he wondered how much to explain to her. "You know… there's something I need to tell you, and I don't know if I can't tell you when you're awake and staring at me with those beautiful eyes and interrupting me and distracting me and…"

He sighed and jerked his right hand out of his pocket, unable to continue without touching her, assuring himself that she was, indeed, alive. "Bells… You have to know that I love you. I've loved you for as long as I can remember, and sometimes I think even before that. You're it for me – I haven't even bothered to look at another girl. I can't…" he shook his head, changing his mind. "I won't just sit by and let you change for him," Jacob gritted his teeth against the new wave of anger that rose in his chest. "I love you too much for that. You don't have to choose me… you just can't… choose that." He took reached out towards her with one trembling finger, tracing the soft curve of her cheekbone, down her jawline. "If you want to live out the rest of your life in the arms of another man, I promise that I won't stop you. I want you to be happy, even if it's not with me. I've realized that I can handle being your second choice, being forever stuck in the friend category." Tears pooled in his dark eyes and he fought them, willing them to dry up in his sockets, refusing to blink and allow them to spill down his cheeks. "But you have to live, Bella," he whispered fiercely, and he bit his lip, struggling to keep the pain out of his voice. "You don't get to just decide to die, Bella. I won't let you do that. I can survive, knowing that you're out there somewhere, having babies and growing old, but I will not let you be one of them. Do you hear me?" he ground out, his teeth tightly clenched. "I won't let you."

The steady stream of words finally stopped, and Jacob bowed his head, unable to hold back the hot stream of tears that flowed down his russet cheeks. He wanted her to hear him, to understand, to change her mind, to finally get it, but he wasn't sure if she ever would. She had known the truth, even before the accident, and how she could convince herself that vampirism was some kind of virtue, he would never understand. But Edward had given his word, and Jacob would make sure the entire pack kept him to it.

Bella finally had the choices that Jacob had wished for her – her mind was a clean slate, and there was no supernatural voodoo to cloud her judgment. A very small part of him was still hopeful that she would choose him this time instead of the leech, but he squashed it deep down into the dark recesses of his heart – if he allowed that hope to live and grow, it would only destroy him, and he owed it to the pack to be better than that. He couldn't allow Bella Swan to rule his life anymore, no matter how much he loved her. The very small "if" in their relationship was not enough to come between himself and his people – he had to be the man his mother had dreamed he could become.

He raised his head again to watch as her eyelids twitched with REM sleep and he briefly wondered what it was she was dreaming about. But then he sighed – did it matter anyway? She was alive, and now the only person that could save Bella Swan was Bella Swan. It was out of his hands – he loved her, and that was the only thing he had left to give. He was empty, destroyed, torn apart, but he could still love her.

But that was it.

Jacob heard the click of the handle mechanism on the door and he turned to see Charlie framed by the light of the hallway. "Hey, Charlie," he said softly.

But Charlie's eyes only saw his daughter.

Jacob felt like a voyeur as he watched a myriad of emotions cross the older man's face, and he felt that familiar pain tug at his heart. This agony was such a private thing, and he did not want to intrude any longer. He started to stand, to leave Charlie alone with Bella, but Charlie held up one hand, gesturing for Jacob to sit again.

Jacob watched as Charlie slowly crossed the room to sit in the chair opposite him. No words were said, and Charlie let his quiet tears speak for him. Jacob pulled his gaze away, attempting to leave Charlie alone with his thoughts, but the throat clearing that followed told Jacob that Charlie had other ideas.

"So…" Charlie began slowly, his gruff voice softer than usual. "You and Edward…"

Jacob nodded, unsure how else to respond.

"Do I want to know?" Charlie finally asked, the questions obvious in his eyes.

Jacob shook his head. Now that was a story he would never tell anyone, especially Bella's father and the Police Chief of Forks.

Charlie grunted. "Well, she's safe now, so I can't ask for much for than that." Jacob heard him take a deep breath. "Can I assume that everything's been taken care of?"

Jacob's mouth fell open in shock. Was Charlie asking him if Bella's kidnappers were…? "Um, what do you mean, Charlie?" Jacob managed to croak out. "I'm not sure I understand.

Charlie grunted again. "You're not stupid, boy. Just answer the question. Promise me that everything has been taken care of. I'd hate to think I'd have to go back out there, and… clean up," he emphasized, raising his eyebrows meaningfully.

Jacob coughed, nearly choking on his own spit. "Um, no, Charlie. Everything is fine, I promise."

"Humph…" Charlie muttered, crossing his arms over his chest, but the hard look on his face softened. "I want to thank you, then, Jacob-"

Jacob cut him off before this conversation went farther than he felt comfortable with. "Just don't, Charlie, ok? I appreciate the sentiment, but just… don't." He knew that killing vampires and protecting people was supposed to be the reason behind his wolfy existence, but it made him sick to think of Charlie actually thanking him for killing another creature, no matter how much that creature had deserved it. He was tired of normal people being dragged into this unholy supernatural mess – it was bad enough that Bella was involved – the last thing he needed was to have to worry about Charlie, too.

Charlie nodded, breaking off their eye contact. "I spoke with Carlise," he said softly, changing the subject. Jacob sucked in a breath and held it, afraid of what he was about to hear. "He said that… Bella is septic – she has a blood infection. He said it started as an infection around the wounds on her wrist… a staph infection. And… the repeated cuts to her skin infected the blood stream."

Jacob's brows drew together in thought. "So… she has MRSA?"

Charlie shook his head, holding up his hands in defeat. "I'm not sure I understand either, but she hasn't shown much improvement in the last few hours, although he said the medication can take some time. But she has a very high fever, increased heart and respiratory rate, and a high white blood cell count." His eyes slowly closed again, and Jacob heard him take a deep breath, and when he spoke again, his voice was trembling. "But Jacob… they found a blood clot…. In her brain. They can't treat it until they treat the infection, or…" his voice trailed off and Jacob assumed the worse.

Charlie cleared his throat again, and Jacob watched him blink heavily against the water in his eyes. "Um, Jacob, would you… mind…"

Jacob nodded vigorously, standing. "Of course, Charlie. Take all the time you need. I'll be right down the hall if you need anything."

Charlie nodded back, just one tilt of the head, but Jacob felt the effort that the small gesture took. He looked back down at her, one more time, reluctant to leave her alone, but knew that if he had his choice, Charlie would be the best one.

Jacob walked out of the room, and down the hall to the waiting room, feeling an almost irresistible urge to turn around and go back. He was terrified about leaving her unprotected again, and foolishly, he felt like he was the best one suited to do the job. It was irrational, he knew, but the desire to protect was laced into his DNA, and it wasn't an instinct that was difficult to ignore. Silencing the screaming voice that shouted at him to turn around, he slowly walked down the hallway, searching for the waiting room. It was when he smelled the distinct aroma of leech that he knew that he had found it.

He turned to his right and found Edward in a small room, full of uncomfortably tiny chairs and an impossibly small TV with a picture so fuzzy that even his wolf eyes could not determine the show it played. He picked a seat on the floor next to the window, leaning his broad back against the stiff couch behind him. His eyes shifted to the creature sitting only a few feet away, watching Edward as he pretended to read an ancient edition of Time magazine. It never ceased to amaze him how easily the vampire pretended to be human – his chest moved up and down easily, mimicking the rhythmic beat of the human heart, he blinked at fairly even intervals and he shifted his weight occasionally, regularly enough to the casual observer that it appeared like a very natural movement.

"Can I ask what it is that I am doing that is so fascinating to you, wolf?" Edward said softly, his eyes never leaving the page he was pretending to read.

Jacob shrugged. "I know that you answered my questions already about your human gestures, but I just can't get over how easily you pretend."

Edward's dark brows drew together as his eyes left the page to study Jacob's face. "I'm sorry if my behavior disturbs you, but I do not wish to leave the hospital until Bella has recovered. "

"Really?" Jacob snorted, rolling his eyes. "Couldn't figure that one out."

Edward's eyes narrowed in irritation. "I have done my very best to be cordial with you, but you insist on testing my patience. I would appreciate if you would extend me the same respect."

A low growl rumbled deep in Jacob's chest. "I would like to remind you, that the reason I don't like you is built into my DNA. I really don't have a choice in the matter, although I wouldn't like you anyway, even if we didn't have this thing-" One large hand gestured between them. "influencing my emotions."

"And what is it, exactly, that you find so offensive about my presence, Jacob?" Edward asked, the tone of his voice acidic. "I know that dogs are very base creatures, but I imagine that you are still capable of intellectual reflection.

Jacob actually laughed. He was surprised that after all of this time that the leech still didn't have a clue. "Fine. You want to talk to me like I'm an idiot?" he sneered. "I find your predilection for the consumption of human blood rather unsavory. I believe your habits are disturbing and nauseating in the simplest of terms – you describe yourself as a vegetarian, when in fact you are a predator in the worse way imaginable. You have used your charms to convince Bella that your detrimental fascination with her blood is love, when in all actuality, you have manipulated her into being your subservient pet. And if you're a believer in Freudian theory, you have used her Electra Complex against her, having somehow persuaded her that you are actually deserving of her time, love, energy… life…" He emphasized the last word, letting all of his hate for the ridiculously pathetic creature seated across from him. "And how could I forget…? The most important point…" His lips curled into a snarl, his vocabulary of intelligent words suddenly forgotten. "You fucking sparkle, you douchebag. What the fuck is that about?"

Edward's eyes had slowly darkened as the harsh words had poured from Jacob's mouth, and felt the wood of the chair arms splintered as he had gripped them to the point of destruction. His iron body was completely froze, so still in fact, that if unless someone had been watching the rage as it swirled in his eyes, they might have believe him a statue. But as Jacob's final question rolled through his brain, he could help the ridiculous bark of laughter that shot out of his mouth. Jacob's eyebrows shot up in surprise, expecting fury instead of laughter, and it almost embarrassed him to think that his question had been more amusing than he had planned.

"I'm sorry, Jacob," Edward murmuring, wiping his cold palms along his icy cheeks as if to smooth away that laugh lines that lingered there. "That was not a question I was expecting to hear you say." But this the smile vanished almost as suddenly as it had appeared. "Given the circumstances, I'm going to apologize for my thoughtless insult a few moments ago, and I will assume that you feel the same." He raised an eyebrow at Jacob questioningly, but the wolf looked away. Edward sighed and continued. "To answer your question about our skin-" The corners of his mouth tugged up again.

"I suppose there are a few ways that you could interpret the answer. The first is the obvious, scientific explanation. When a beam of light crosses the boundary between a vacuum and another medium, the wavelength of the light changes, but the frequency remains constant. If the beam of light is not normal to the boundary, the change in wavelength results in a change in the direction of the beam, causing refraction." His golden gaze turned back to Jacob, who struggled to not look confused. Edward laughed lightly. "Like when you see rainbows in a glass prism." Jacob's expression cleared and he coughed when he felt the blush rise in his cheeks.

"To continue," Edward said, looking out the window at the sun. "Glass, for instance, has a higher refractive index than air. When the light passes through, a phenomenon known as dispersion occurs. The components of the white light are refracted at different angles, and the colors are the separations of the light that you see." He took a deep breath and looked at Jacob, who nodded. "I believe that refraction occurs when the sunlight hits our skin because our skin has a different genetic make-up than yours. This would make us appear-" he raised his hands and make finger quotes in the air. "- as you say, 'sparkly'." He lowered his hands and his gaze moved away from Jacob's, back to the window, and his voice deepened, the tone of his voice hardening. "However, it could also be assumed, as the world's best predator, that we are meant to be beautiful, that everything about me invites you in…. To attract our prey, perhaps we are designed to resemble items that humans typically find so appealing… like diamonds."

Jacob snorted and it caused Edward's head spin back towards him immediately. Jacob rolled his eyes. "I'm sorry, leech, but there's nothing about you that invites me to be anywhere remotely close to you."

"Believe me, wolf, the feeling is mutual," Edward murmured in reply, the corner of his lips turning up again.

Charlie chose that moment to interrupt their rather awkward game of male bonding. "I'm going downstairs to eat. I haven't had a bite since sometime yesterday." His eyes flicked between the pair before settling on Jacob. "Jake, will you please come sit with her?" Jacob nodded, and a grim smile slid across his face. It was juvenile to feel pleased at being chosen over Edward, but he was only 17 and really didn't give a shit what was mature and what wasn't. "Sure thing, Charlie," he replied softly, and left the waiting room without a backwards glance.

When he entered Bella's room, he found a nurse by her bed, working with the tubes and needles in her arms. Jacob swallowed the growl that rose in this throat and instead said, "How is she doing?"

The nurse looked up and gave him a small smile. "Her vitals have not improved much in the last few hours, but her fever has not increased, so I suppose we can take that as a good sign."

Jacob swallowed again, but this time it was to push down the lump of tears that threatened to surface. "Is she going to wake up?" He was afraid to ask, but needed to.

The nurse shrugged. "She is not on medication to keep her asleep, so I believe she will wake when her body is ready to." She smiled again, but it didn't reach her eyes. She gathered her equipment and patted his arm as she walked passed.

He sank back down into the chair by the bed, taking her frail hand in his. He leaned towards her, his lips grazing against her cheek. "Please, Bells…" he murmured softly, pleading with her. "Please wake up. I'm right here. Please, Bells? I'll do anything you want, be anyone that you need, but I can't survive without you…"

He sighed, watching her face. Of course that wouldn't work. Wishful thinking didn't have magical powers. But that didn't stop him from wanting to be closer to her, feeling her faint heartbeat inside her chest, her sweet breath fluttering faintly against his face. He could hold her, keep her warm, remind her that no matter where she had disappeared to, that he would be here when she woke up.

Jacob leaned back, adjusting the handrail so that it was flush with the mattress. He carefully lifted the tubing, maneuvering himself around it until his large body was folded around her smaller one. He slid one thick arm underneath her neck, cradling her closer. He couldn't stop the sigh that slipped out of lips as she settled against him. God, how he had missed her.

"I love you, honey," he whispered to her, and then his eyes closed. And then he let sleep consume him, too exhausted to fight anymore.

Jacob awoke with a start. The room was sheathed in darkness, the only illumination the soft light above her bed. He blinked, his sharp eyes scanning the room, but he saw nothing. His upper body moved gently away from the mattress, and he disentangled himself carefully, not wanting to accidently hurt Bella. He had just lifted the last tube when he heard his name.

"Jacob…" the sound was soft, hoarse, and the most beautiful thing that he had ever heard.

His neck jerked his head around so quickly he felt his tendons crack in protest, and he looked down, his heart almost giving out when he realized her soft brown eyes were staring up him.

"Bella…" he gasped, and he couldn't stop his hand from reaching down to stroke her cheek, almost terrified that he would discover he was dreaming.

"Thank you…" she managed, and her tongue darted out to moisten her cracked lips. He turned awkwardly on the sheets, reaching for her cup of water. He held the straw up, and he smiled as she gulped it greedily. She sighed, and her eyes closed for a half second before reopening to gaze at him. "Jake…?" her voice was quiet, confused.

"Yes, honey?" He asked hopefully. His heart was full to bursting, overflowing with all of the things he had always wanted to say to her, but in the moment, it was all he could to stop himself from kissing her until they were both breathless.

"Why didn't you tell me?" she asked quietly, and her eyes were full of pain.

His brows knit together in puzzlement. "What are you talking about, Bells?" he asked, a deep pit of dread pooling in his stomach.

She sighed, and a small tear leaked from one eye. "You should have told me… it was wrong to keep it from me. I… trusted you more than him."

His chest tightened and Jacob forgot how to breathe. "Told you what, honey?" He choked out, but the answer was obvious.

Bella turned her head to look up at him again, wincing with the effort it took. "I always knew, Jacob, even when I forgot." Her delicate hand rose off the bed, and one trembling finger traced the contours of his bronze cheek. "But the accident gave me the opportunity to… learn things."

"Like what?" he said softly.

She gave him a painful smile. "Now I know that you would never hurt me…"

Her voice trailed off, and she waited for him to understand. Bella felt overwhelmed by the sensation that she only have moments left, that she had to make it see before it was all over. She wouldn't be allowed to stay – she knew that now. But he would know before it took her.

Recognition hit him like a 10 ton truck, and he felt like his lungs would collapse under the weight of it. "Bella…" he breathed, and he lowered his face to hers, capturing her tiny, cool lips with his warm ones. She gasped, her upper body rising up off of the sheets to be closer to him.

It was agonizing and freeing, this kiss, but it was also desperate and fleeting. As quickly as it began, she pulled back, and he groaned at the loss of her. "Please…" he moaned softly, his handsome features twisted with disappointment and fear.

To his complete surprise, her brown eyes filled with tears, and he felt her fingers trembling on his cheek. "I'm sorry, Jake…" she whispered, and her hand fell away.

"Bella…" he started to say, his tone full of dread. The hair on the back of his neck tingling, and he felt the growl, low in his abdomen, the danger obvious to his wolf.

But then he could not but watch as her eyes rolled back in her head, her spine stiffened, sending her torso rising upwards in jerky motions, her limbs rigid and flailing. Her body swelled with convulsions, and she began to make a sickening choking noise.

He was pushed to the side as the medical personnel flooded the room. The doctors and nurses surrounded her bed, shouting orders to one another.

"She's having a seizure!"

"Someone get the crash cart!"

"Hold on her on side! Keep her still!"

"Nurse! Give me Klonopin – we need to stop this seizure, now!"

"She needs entubated - she's aspirating!"

"Page Dr. Stevens! This could be the clot rupturing!"

"...aneurysm..."

"... low BP..."

"...erratic heartbeat..."

"Where is Dr. Stevens?"

Jacob managed to position himself in the corner, wedging himself between the wall and the window, but he couldn't see anything because of all the doctors. Tears flooded his eyes and he knew he could only blame himself. He slowly sunk to the floor, burying his head in his hands. His large frame trembled in fear, his shoulders shaking with heavy sobs.

And now all he could was pray.