Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam 00 or any of these characters.

Warning: This is BL.

Ordinary Love

It was the middle of a battle field when I ran into him again. It was then when I realized that this boy was the pilot of the white Gundam. I had just gotten to the dispute area that had asked the Union for aid as one of the MSWAD's Gundam investigation unit. He seemed like he came to investigate for the next mission from Celestial Being to intervene in the dispute. He was still fighting as ever and his upright eyes had not changed a bit. The boy, who I thought would be fighting in Azadistan only, was standing there without a doubt, radiating and existing.

The red-colored eyes were reflecting me. Whether he had remembered me or forgotten about me, he looked at me silently and I passed him by as if I didn't know him either. I wondered why. I didn't want to share his identity with anyone. But our encounter was no accident; it was inevitable. I knew that I definitely would run into him again someday. And in this big and wide world, we did meet again.

A third meeting. The world calls it "fate".

...

Chapter Two

I'm standing in a shadow by myself.

The smell of blood was so strong that it was making me dizzy. There were spots of blood everywhere on me, which I did not know if they belonged to me or someone else. I was standing in middle of a battle field. I can't tell how many I have killed. I was with KPSA in the past and currently with Solester Being. Each organization had a different name and different motives but nonetheless, people were killed with these two hands.

「…Soran.」

Don't call me by that name. Don't call me with that voice. Whenever I am about to find peace within myself- she appears every time. Her trembling hand reaches out to me but every time I point the cold metal gun at her instead. How many times have I actually called her "mother"….?

「Why,….Soran.」

My finger pulls the trigger on its own. I kill her every time. No matter how much you regret it and try to change it, you can't because that's the past.

Am I regretting my past?

No… that's not it. I am not allowed to regret anything and that's my destiny. It's my punishment for my sins.

Her body falls to the ground, lifeless. My feet are standing in the pool of blood from her body. The blood kept on flowing and piles of people's bodies that I have killed appeared one by one before my eyes. I drop my hand gun and fall into the sea of blood. I know that I cannot let myself become happy yet. I have to fight as long as I'm alive. That is the reason for my existence.

「It's okay. You can enjoy an ordinary life when you're with me. I…actually would like to see that.」

With that, Graham smiles at me. The truth is...I have always wanted to touch his radiant blonde hair. Graham always knows what I want, even if I don't say it out loud. He always does, even right now. As if granting me the permission to touch his hair, he softly calls out "Setsuna." And pulled by his voice, I reach my hand out to him.

But before my blood soaked hand even touches him, his body jerks and falls lifelessly. His clear eyes no longer reflect me. And I'm still standing on the sea of blood, alone.

Him and I… We are together in the same space, yet somehow we are in different worlds apart.

"–Graham!"

I was panting as I got myself up in bed. It was a dream. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest and my body was soaked in cold sweat. The name that I shouted desperately in my sleep, disperses into the dark room. It was a bad and a confusing dream. I can feel my eyebrows furrowing as I sighed out loud. My heart was slowing down a little.

I had never thought that I would dream about him. I don't dream often, but my dreams are always about my past in Kurgis or the people that I have killed. Today's dream was no exception but- he appeared in it.

I already know it myself. I need to put an end with him. He is an enemy and we never know when we would be pointing pistols at each other. He and I were too different to be together and furthermore, impossible to have an ordinary relationship. Whenever I spent time with him, I felt that continuing to see him was a wrong move.

I spot the red roses across the room and I feel sick as I remember the dream again.

"….I don't like this feeling…."

But I do not know why.

It hasn't even been that long since I decided that I need to stop seeing him when he came by again. Without being able the slam the door at his face, I let him inside again. My tension died down after seeing his cheerful face. I even brought out tea for him then again was dragged out by those big hands. I kept thinking that I can't always go with his pace but I already was swept in it.

Apparently today's agenda was shopping because we arrived at a busy street with shops and huge department stores. There were huge screens on top of the buildings everywhere with commercials playing. The streets were filled with people enjoying themselves. I was sort of taken aback by the chaotic crowd but I guess Graham was used to it because as soon as he got out of the car, he smiled at me and took my hand again because "so that I don't lose you" which makes no sense. Pulled by his hand, I walked through the street and caught a glimpse of us on the show window. The reflection of him and I seemed so normal and ordinary that I thought "I guess I'm somewhat used to situations like this."

"Setsuna?"

Are you okay? he asks. I stop in my track as a thought creeps into my head. Something inside me started to question if it was okay to be like this after all. When I had stopped, Graham also stopped in his track next to me and looked at me with questioning gaze. I just stared back. I thought that… maybe…it was okay after all like this. The two of us weren't in a particularly wrong situation and I thought maybe it was okay not to end it now.

"…Bathroom."

"Aa, I will wait here."

Waves of thoughts were coming in and I needed to get myself together. So I made up an excuse to relieve Graham's worried-questioning look and hid myself against the wall as soon as I turned the corner. A burst of sigh came out. From my hand which was trembling a little, I could still feel the warmth of his hand.

There were many people in the street but no one stared at Graham and I; two guys together. At first he was an persistent enemy then he became a strange guy. And now, he's become a routine in my life. The relationship between us was not normal but no one seemed to have noticed. Someday I may be pointing a gun at him, but I also know from a numerous fights that he won't die that easily. So…wouldn't it be okay to be a little selfish? For just a little bit, wouldn't it be okay for me to hold onto him? A dream is only a dream.

I looked down at my hand and clenched it as I thought, hoping to catch the last of the warmth that was disappearing.

"It might be okay."

I wanted to believe it so I said it softly to myself. Maybe I wanted it to be like this from the very beginning. But then again, I didn't know how to reject. Because I'm already tied to him, perhaps there's no other way. He is my enemy but because I know what kind of person he is, I do not wish to hurt him. That does not mean that I will stop my fight to eradicate all wars.

Yet.. maybe with this hand….

I may have my wish without having to kill him if I continued to live on. Having hopeful thoughts, unlike myself, took some pressure off of me. Let's go back, to where he is. Feeling all the warmth gone, I opened up my clenched hand. There is nothing in this hand. No warmth, and thankfully no blood or guns.

I got myself off the wall, turned around the corner, and spotted him right away within the crowd. Just as before I had left, he is standing at the same spot waiting for me. I picked up my pace towards him and the distance between us began to close.

He was very focused on something as he waited for me. I realized as I got closer that he was watching some program on one of the big screens on the buildings. Actually, it wasn't just some program. In the giant screen, which had taken Graham Aker's full attention that he didn't notice me, was spreading its wings- the big news maker; Celestial Being's white Gundam, my Exia.

"Exia…."

I whisper as I stop in my track. Why is it that Exia is at the end of his gaze? His gaze that seemed to be so full of love and excitement. Why is my beautiful and strong Gundam there? My face darkens as I look at him and he realizes after I called out my Gundam that I was beside him. He seemed perplexed. All I see now is him and Exia. Any resolution that I had made seconds before fades right away now that I'm shaken. I knew it, I was wrong.

I felt.. as if a part of my chest deep inside had a hole.

"Ah..Setuna, I.."

"Don't ever come see me again."

"What?"

Graham opened his mouth to desperately make excuses as he stepped towards me. But it seemed like the Exia behind him in the screen was telling me to come to my senses, telling me not to get mixed with him anymore, and blaming me. The next scene was Exia fighting- me fighting. As if dancing, swinging the sword without stopping- Exia was a noble sinner. I have sins that cannot be forgiven by the gods themselves, and having me inside, Exia was my "god" and Gundam. I know more than anyone else that I'm that sinner inside the Gundam on the screen, so I clenched my hands.

Graham and I- no, even if it wasn't Graham, the thought of living an ordinary life with someone or anyone was my arrogance. The only permitted moment in my life is to fight with Exia. Therefore, I have cut this string, this connection between us. I shout, interrupting and not listening to him. I felt so sick that I had to shout and get something out of me.

"The one you are interested in is not me! It's Exia. Can't you say that it isn't so? Graham Aker! You were only looking for glimpses of Exia within me!"

"Setsuna!"

Graham, you told me that you wish for me to enjoy an ordinary life when with you. But...if I was just an ordinary boy, would you have looked at me to begin with?

"Don't touch me!"

I shouted at him and shook off his arm violently as he desperately grabbed for my arm. A clear rejection. I had never refused him this strongly. Graham who seemed like he would be persistent and never let go, flinches and steps back. I couldn't bring myself to look at his face and turned around to run. I could feel his gaze pulling me back but I closed my eyes shut and ignored it. A boundary line is drawn again, between him and I.

How did we become so twisted? No use of regretting the first moments, we were...I was too twisted in this.

To Be Continued...

Thank you for the reviews and subscriptions... I was honestly expecting no responses since Graham x Setsuna is a bit of a minor crowd.. I think..

I don't think there's that much of Gundam 00 yaoi stuff out there to begin within the western society YET. Last summer, I remember purchasing quite a few doujinshi (by few, i mean 10) from Osaka. There were so many doujinshi but sadly it was hard to find Graham x Setsuna even then. I'll be honest, I was Lockon x Setsuna at first... but something clicked and I switched, hahaha.

Well it wasn't the fastest upload, considering that all I have to do is translate my-already-written-jabbers into English... But Gundam 00 Movie: A Wakening of the Trailblazer- was kind of depressing for me. I won't give anything away but it was weird. Definitely weird- like this post 2008 super out of this world stuff, like Code Geass's second season? But I definitely enjoyed it, no doubt. Just had to run around the house for 10 minutes yelling and swearing about it after thinking some things through. Definitely go watch it- :) Files started to float around the internet shortly after Christmas.

If you liked it/hated it- please leave reviews or let me know.

I...just wanted see our Set-chan being jealous of Exia~~~~~~~~ T_T