Chapter Eight: To Forget is A Sin

Darkness. His whole word filled to the brim with darkness. His body felt heavy with emotions and yet it felt almost dreamlike. All of his memories drifted slowly in and out of his mind and he just viewed them like a spectator. A spectator to his own dreams. Suddenly, his surroundings brightened and Shepard found himself on his knees still holding his gun between his fingers.

"What the hell is going on?" he whispered as he stared at his instrument of death.

"You did something I never thought I'd see." a voice responded.

Shepard peered up and there stood Liara with her arms folded across her chest. She stared down at him with an aggravated expression.

"Are you alive?" he found himself asking.

She shook her head as she paced around.

"Shepard, giving up like that is not like you. You're giving up on everyone who needs you, including me."

"How? How am I giving up on you? I already failed you." he said, his finger twitched on the trigger.

"I need you to finish what we were sent out to do. I need you to be strong like you were the day I met you."

He looked up at her clearly not understanding.

"I can't keep going without you, not after what we've been through."

"Shepard, nothing is far from your reach."

"You are."

She smiled.

"That's where you're wrong. I'm never far away and trust me, when the time comes, you'll see me in action."

"What do you mean?"

"That's for another time , right now, you need to go back and face yourself."

"Must I?"

"You must. You don't have much time left so I'm not going to bother to go and find her to show you."

"Who?"

She smiled...

Shepard opened his eyes, he remained in the dark but his environment felt the same. He stood and noticed his gun only several feet away from him, the confusion of whether or not he had really shot himself stood in his mind. At this point he didn't care.

"Seems you have awaken." said the disembodied voice, "I was getting worried."

Shepard ignored it as he picked up his gun and cocked it.

"What are you doing?" it asked.

Again he ignored it as he began walking through the darkness.

"Where are you going? Don't come this way."

Shepard continued on, his senses taking over his actions.

"Stop! Stop right there!" the voice begged.

Shepard did stop but not in obedience. He placed his hand on a softly gleaming wall that stood before him and began to push into it.

"Stop that!"

Shepard wound up his fist and plunged it into the glass pulling a Salarian from within its depths.

"How the hell did you know of the viewing window?" asked Anolais.

Shepard only gripped the Salarian's neck tightly.

"I'm not even going to ask how you managed to escape arrest. I just want answers."

"You'll get nothing from me, stupid human."

\ "Wrong answer."

Shepard rocketed the Salarian into parts of the viewing window still bearing fragmented glass ignoring the creature's yell of agony.

"You wanna tell me now?"

"To hell with you!"

He jammed Anolais's face into the wall next to the window with such force Shepard thought for a moment he might have killed him.

"Human filth..."

Guess not.

"Tell me, did you send an assassin to deal with me?"

"So what if I did? She was obviously unsuccessful."

"Considering you said 'she' I'll take that as a definite yes. Are you helping the Reapers?"

"Please, I'm much more civilized then that. I sent the bitch to kill you in return for my freedom from prison. Now I realize I was unsuccessful in my end. Go ahead, kill me. I'll be dead once they realize you still breathe."

"I should kill you. But I have a better idea."

The entrance hatch of the Normandy lifted and there stood Shepard holding Anolais by the shoulder. The shocked faces of everyone who waited anxiously for his return lit the room in a fiery wave.

"What the hell is HE doing here?!" roared Ashley as she rotated her shotgun around her waist and into the face of the Salarian.

"Stand down!" said Shepard, "He's an ally."

Confusion spread like wildfire.

"What the hell do you mean he's an ally? Where's Liara?" asked Tali.

Shepard glared at her before answering.

"Our good old friend, Anolais, has decided to lend us the rest of his private squads. And is even allowing us to use Noveria as a base."

"Wait, I thought Anolais worked for people who owned the planet? How does he have jurisdiction?" Garrus quarried.

"The old owners were involved in the conflict back at the citadel when Saren tried to take it over, as a result, they were killed and since there were no beneficiaries, Anolais was next in line to gain control. Simple huh?"

Everyone nodded but the thought of an enemy becoming ally was not very fathomable. Shepard called Ashley to take the disgruntled Salarian into contempt for the time being while he retreated into the comm room.

He entered feeling the sudden loss of Liara hit him with a devastating blow. He had to stay strong for the crew, the moment they realize their commander was beginning to break their moral would plummet. But it was difficult, she was no where to be found when he regained consciousness. Was her body taken? Was it possible she was still alive?

No... she died in his arms.

"Commander? Are you alright?"

The softness in Ashley's voice was actually somewhat smooth, something he never thought existed.

"I'm fine, Williams. Report back to your duties."

"Commander, even though we are both professionals which forbids us to get closer than normal it doesn't mean I don't care for you."

These words she spoke, were sudden.

"Williams, I thank you for your caring nature but we're on a mission and it cannot be disrupted."

"Stop calling me by my last name. You know damn well what my first name is."

"Ashley, just leave" he said feeling his heart beginning to become distressed.

"Not until you tell me one of two things. Where is Liara? Or what's wrong with you?"

Silence filled in the gap where Shepard's response should have been.

"She's not coming back is she?" she asked raising her hands over her lips.

Shepard looked down and then to her.

"No," he began, "she's not coming back."

"You two... were involved... weren't you?"

He nodded.

"Not to make things worse but I had a feeling you guys were an item. Call it girl's intuition." she said stepping close to him.

Suddenly, she wrapped her arms around him resting her head on his back.

"I know how it feels to lose someone you loved." she said, "I still owe you thanks."

"For what?"

"If you haven't pulled me away from that beacon, I would have surely been killed. My mind is strong enough to see what you have seen." she said.

"No problem."

"Remember her, she was a good woman."

"I will."

"To lose someone is a shame, to forgot is a sin."

"I know. I'll find a way to win this war."

"I know you will."