This Is How A Heart Breaks

By Jasmine Starlight

Full Summary: Yaoi/het. Neji/Sasu Sasuke's slightly mordant; Itachi just might be a sociopath. Maybe Gaara is from a broken home. Neji just may be in the closet. Maybe Naruto might be lonely. Maybe Kabuto needs someone to love. Maybe Kakashi might need someone to hold. Maybe Sakura might need real friends. Maybe Temari needs a reality check. Maybe Kankurou needs anger management. Maybe Jiraiya needs Tsunade. Maybe Orochimaru needs them both. Maybe Hinata needs freedom. Maybe Kiba might need acceptance. Maybe Ino needs confidence. Maybe Tenten needs medication. Perhaps Shikamaru needs love. Shino, quite possibly could need companionship. Maybe Tayuya is hiding behind her personality. Maybe Haku fears rejection. Maybe Kimimaro desires friendship. Maybe Lee is crying out for attention. Maybe Obito needs compassion.

Pairings: Neji/Sasu…Kimimaro/Haku…Obito/Kakashi eventual…then Itachi/Kabuto…Tenten/Kankurou…Naruto/Gaara Orochimaru/Jiraiya/Tsunade…Open to suggestions. Shikamaru/Temari…Kiba/Ukon! Zaku/Kin… Hinata/Shino…Tayuya/Lee. Dosu/Kidoumaru…Zabuza/Haku…then…Zabuza/Kisame! Shisui/Sakon! Ino/Sakura.

Lots of Uchiha in this chapter.

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

FILTH IN THE BEAUTY

"Since when did were we unable to pass the days smiling as we should be?
The season spent together with you is dyed white, lying thickly in my heart

Aa, the powdery snow falls incessantly in this sky
Now, I reach out my hand, and took hold of you.

What's more beautiful than the warm snow?
Falling upon and disappearing on our cheeks
Like the white flower, you were blooming"

---Alice Nine; Gin no Tsuki Kuroi Hoshi

§§§§§§§§§§§

"Would you happen to have a steak?" Sasuke said as he appeared on Neji's doorstep a few hours after his phone call.

Neji frowned in puzzlement and opened his door to let Sasuke in. Sasuke was cradling his face in one hand and when Neji went to freezer to get out ice he saw that his boyfriend's face was covered in one big bruise and his was split.

"What the hell?" he asked handing Sasuke the ice.

"Itachi." Sasuke said by way of explanation.

"Your brother?" Neji said in disbelief. "What'd you do to him?"

Sasuke glared, "What do you mean what'd I do to him? You should be comforting me or something."

Neji stared at him blankly.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

§§§§§§§§§§§

Itachi was not happy. Not at all. Not only had he not finished his paper, he had to listen to his brother's bullshit story about Kabuto, and maybe worst of all he was sitting in front of the Broken Rose in his car hoping that the silver haired boy was not one of the occupants of the many yet affordable rooms in the love motel.

Even worse than all that was the feeling Itachi had felt when Sasuke had described that afternoon's incident. He'd never felt that famed green monster before until this afternoon when it turned him into a completely different person.

Itachi hoped that Sasuke wasn't in his grudge holding mood.

§§§§§§§§§§§

When Obito pulled up to his cousins' house the next morning with Shisui already in the car he'd expected the normal backseat snarking between all teenagers present.

Sasuke would not respond to any jibe or insult Shisui sent his way, that was oddly…mature of him, Obito noted as he maneuvered the vehicle smoothly.

Itachi on the other hand was steadfastly burning a hole in the windshield with his eyes. He said nothing, showed no emotion, and barely moved. Obito idly wondered what was wrong.

But Shisui beat him to the punch, "What the fuck? Sasuke you haven't said a word—are you alive?"

Sasuke opened his mouth to say something but raised a hand to touch his bruised cheek and glared at Itachi instead.

Itachi responded by doing nothing at all. This in turn drove Shisui crazy.

"Is anyone home? HELLO!"

Inwardly, Obito had a hearty chuckle; family was an interesting thing indeed.

§§§§§§§§§§§

As it turned out, Obito hadn't had his fill of family fun yet. He was reminded of this when Sasuke, Itachi, and Shisui trooped into his classroom after the last bell had rung.

"Don't we look happy." He observed putting down the eraser on the chalkboard's ledge.

"Since neither of these two geniuses of talking I guess I have to remind you that tonight we're having that big family dinner where everyone shows up and talks and gets embarrassingly drunk." Shisui said sourly.

Obito raised his eyebrows. So that was tonight. Inwardly shrugging he retrieved his coat and keys and went to the teacher's parking lot.

§§§§§§§§§§§

Obito felt warm in the pit of his stomach as some delicacy he couldn't identify was shoveled onto his plate. He suppressed the urge to yawn and made a beeline toward the basement where the Three Stooges had congregated.

Shisui practically radiated relief at someone who would at least reply at his quips, if not fire a scathing one right back.

The basement was the usual place for the four of them to go when the clan dissolved into drunken adults loudly telling stories that circulated during Christmas and holiday time. Although technically Obito was an adult, now that he had a real job and his own place.

Shisui was saying something, annoying in his ear like a bee but Obito was thinking about what could have driven Itachi and Sasuke to act so weirdly. Waiting until he was sure Shisui was silent he asked the loaded question: "So why are you guys angry at each other?"

The tension was palpable; Shisui looked uneasy.

Obito was fine with the fact that the brothers had decided to ignore his question, he was about to turn his attention back to the muted television when Sasuke replied voice quiet and even.

"Itachi's "friend" has been doing some illicit things." he said vaguely, pushing the food on his plate around, not even blinking when his brother shot him a venomous look.

"What? It's true. Don't even deny it. You can't—you went didn't you? You saw him." Sasuke said suddenly, words flinging themselves at Itachi like weapons.

"Shut up." Itachi said, his voice steely, his grip on his fork becoming white-knuckled.

"No. Admit it." Sasuke said defiantly.

The only sound in the room that mattered was the grinding of Itachi's teeth. The TV had long been ignored and Shisui was too engrossed in this exchange to get up and turn it off.

"Say it. Or can't you? Can't you admit that you Uchiha Itachi made a mistake in judgment?" Sasuke went on.

Obito and Shisui shared a look; Shisui closed the door and locked it. It wouldn't do any good if parental figures heard this argument.

"Shut up. Shut up. SHUT UP!" Itachi shouted.

Obito had an uneasy feeling in his stomach; he regretted his decision of coming down here.

"Stop talking about me like you have any idea what's going in my life Sasuke. Just keep your trap shut for once."

"Why? Because I was right and you can't stand it?"

"People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones. Don't you think I know about you and Hyuuga Neji? Mom and Dad may be blind but I'm not. Do you really think that he's going to give up his life for you? His friends? His sports scholarship? Stop kidding yourself; he's just playing with you. I'm surprised you haven't gone down in flames already." Itachi replied viciously.

Sasuke recoiled as if he'd been hit. But returned fire; "Like Kabuto's playing with you? Like he pretended to act all innocent with you and then disappeared from school and solicited sex from older men in love motels? Like that Aniki?" Sasuke's voice cracked.

Shisui foolishly tried to placate the siblings, "You guys--"

"We should what Shisui? You of all people giving us advice—you're the poster boy for the closeted and the ashamed. Why would Sakon ever love a coward like you?" Sasuke said stabbing the one chink in Shisui's armor. Obito's intervention was the only thing that prevented Shisui from physically rendering his younger cousin to pieces.

"I think that's quite enough from all of you."

Itachi scoffed in disgust and crossed his arms; it wasn't fair that Obito was the only one with peace of mind. If Itachi was going down in flames he'd be damned if everyone one else wasn't going down with him.

"You're a hypocrite like the rest of us, Cousin. Tell me how is Kakashi-sensei?" Shisui and Sasuke were eyeing Itachi like he was a caged animal.

Obito stared at his younger cousin.

"What do you mean?"

"Does he take you out to dinner? Does he send you flowers? Does he call you? Does he wrap his arms around you? Does he touch you and kiss you and mark you all over? Tell me, does he make love to you?" Itachi's eyes were red, not with anger but with tears.

Obito felt the bubble that he'd been living in for the past few weeks pop. And now he was falling, oh was he falling. This couldn't be true.

"I bet he does. I bet he loves you—but Cousin I hope it isn't in the way he loved me. In closets or in empty classrooms. Cousin I hope you get the decency of a bed." Itachi said his voice barely above a whisper.

§§§§§§§§§§§

"Why'd you want to come over?" Naruto asked quizzically as he opened the door and let his best friend in. "And what happened to your face?"

"Long story. Do you have any really violent video games that we can play?" Sasuke said darkly, ignoring the mess in Naruto's room and sitting on the bed.

Naruto blinked and stared at Sasuke, who'd been acting weird lately but as of this moment had begun acting his weirdest yet.

"Not until you tell me what's up." Naruto said closing his bedroom door and Sasuke clenched his fists and looked skyward.

§§§§§§§§§§§

Naruto and Sasuke had relocated to their old childhood haunt, the decrepit playground swings at the elementary school they'd attended.

Naruto was silent, "And then we got into the biggest argument I've ever had with any of them. Suffice it to say that we don't have anymore secrets."

"A lot of big traumatizing secrets that really should never have been told."

Naruto nodded appreciatively, "Like what?"

Sasuke eyed Naruto speculatively before replying, "Like Kakashi-sensei and Itachi were sleeping together."

For once, Naruto's only reaction to something shocking was silence.

"Yeah. Imagine that reaction only multiplied times a million." Sasuke said, having said enough.

The only sound for awhile was the creaking of the swing set as they sat there in amicable quiet.

"So has Gaara made a move yet?"

Naruto flushed and looked down at his feet. Sasuke felt the corners of his mouth quirk in a grin, "Has he done more than that?" he teased poking Naruto in the arm.

The ramen loving boy was now as pink as a pansy, and Sasuke laughed.

"That's cool. You guys are perfect for each other."

Naruto's face cooled to its previous color, he checked his watch, "Hey you want to stay for dinner?"

Sasuke thought about it, dinner at Naruto's usually consisted of ramen and some kind of vegetable with folic acid. It was way more appealing than dinner at his house but Sasuke decided that enough was enough.

"As much as I love spinach casserole and beef ramen I think I'll have to pass. Time to fight it out again." Sasuke said resolutely.

"If I fall asleep call me on my cell to tell me about WWIII."

"Can do."

§§§§§§§§§§§

Sasuke said hello to his mother and some semblance of a greeting to his father before making his way up to his brother's room. Setting his bag down outside the door he knocked and then entered.

Predictably Itachi was sitting at his computer trying to finish something.

"Itachi. I think we need to talk." He said quietly waiting for his brother to look at him.

"Really? I think we've talked enough." Itachi replied, voice hollow.

Sasuke rolled his eyes, "Stop acting like a girl. You said really mean things and I said really mean things. Can we call it even?"

"Even? You're kidding right?" Itachi turned to stare at his brother.

"No I'm not because unlike you, instead of spending all this time in my room alone typing something that obviously doesn't hold my interest I would be out asking Kabuto why he hasn't come to school in months and why I saw him at a love motel with some guy when I'm apparently in love with him."

Itachi was silent, if he was gearing to throw something at Sasuke's head, his little brother was ready.

"Yeah. I noticed that—even if you hadn't. So you can talk as much shit as you want about me or Obito or Shisui—it doesn't matter. Bringing other people down doesn't make you any better."

Itachi was silent; his continued reticence spurred Sasuke on. "What're you afraid of? Dad? I hope not because he hasn't intimidated me since middle school."

Sasuke ended with this gem: "So in closing, we all owe each other apologies but before that we should fix our fucked up lives. I nominate you to go first."

§§§§§§§§§§§

Life is pretty good, until the other shoe drops. I mean what're the odds that in the same family there are so many secrets that should have been obvious before. But we just ignored them.

Hindsight is always 20/20.

§§§§§§§§§§§

Sasuke sighed as he sat in his usual booth at the coffee shop where he usually snarked at Shisui.

Shisui was late—but Sasuke supposed he deserved it for what he said.

His cousin slid into the booth and an awkward silence commenced.

"I'm sorry." Sasuke said bluntly, resting his hands on the table.

Shisui stared at him blankly.

Why can't he stop being a stubborn ass and accept my apology? Stupid Uchiha pride.

Sasuke was about to speak when Shisui cut him off, "When you and Itachi were fighting and then you said that thing to me. It made me think. Why don't I just ask him out? Why don't I talk to him more? Why don't I do all these things? What am I afraid of? So today I asked him out."

Sasuke blinked.

"And he said yes."

END

YoungSasuke- I don't know about that. I haven't decided whether or not Kabuto should get saved. Thanks.

DancingDragonBlaze- School is ugh. Sadly no NejiSasu in this chap. Uchiha conflict. Sakura's lesbianism shouldn't be that much of a surprise. The first IM conversation is Chapter Ten is Sakura and Ino. Why am I putting them through hell? That's what high school is I guess.

Taiy-Chan- Thanks.

BlackPanther17- There's no way Neji could be straight—look at that hair. It is some kind of sick fan service. I love it.

Dragon77- Thanks.

Xkaarinax-Shh—no guessing until the end.