Author's Note:

First off I want to thank everyone that reviewed last chapter. You guys have no idea how much I appreciate it.

Anyways, a few things happen towards the end of this chapter but rest assured that this story is staying at a T Rating. That's what it started out as and that's the way it's staying. I realize that not everyone enjoys reading lemons, some people even get aggravated by it, so I will not be incorporating a lemon into this story. So if a few of you were worried that I was going to do that I hope this comes as good news to you. Also this chapter is in Paine's POV if any of you were wondering.

I hope you enjoy this chapter! I certainly had a lot of fun writing it.

Chapter XIV:

Leave Yourself Behind

"Which key opens your front door again?" Baralai asked, handing me the set of keys that he found among my motorcycle wreckage that morning.

It had dawned on me the previous night before I fell asleep that we had no way of getting inside my house. My spare keys were in my bedroom but that wasn't going to help us any. Baralai almost jumped up right then to go find them, already dialing his father to ask for his car back. I stopped him though, telling him that he had plenty of time to get them in the morning. Dr. Allbrook told me he was going to make his decision on whether or not I would be discharged in the morning. So if I wasn't going to be released then he would have enough time to drive out to the crash site and search for my keys in the morning.

Coincidentally, the doctor decided to release me after all. Baralai spent almost half an hour on the phone with his father practically begging for his car back. After the first fifteen minutes I was skeptical that he was going to relent so when he told me that his father would be delivering his car to the hospital in the next hour I was taken aback. When I asked him what kind of car he had he only smiled and said I would find out when I saw it. I'm glad he didn't tell me what it was because as soon as I saw it I was insanely jealous.

I was scared to even look at his sleek, top of the line muscle car for fear of scratching it. That was the kind of car I would want if I liked cars. When he pulled up to the curb with it I was shell shocked. Out of all the possible cars I imagined he would have the one that was in front of me now hadn't even entered my mind. The white paint was immaculately shiny, no trace of dirt was visible anywhere. The sun glinted off the navy blue racing stripes that arched gracefully across the hood, roof and back end. The deep thrum of the engine only made my jealousy flare even more. He jumped out of his freaking amazing car and ran around to the passenger door, swiftly pulling it open before jogging over to me. We both thanked the nurse that was waiting with me then he helped me into the passenger seat before driving away.

Now I was watching as he walked towards my front door, the correct key in his hand. While I waited I turned my attention back to the strange pockets in his hood. I had meant to ask him on the ride from the hospital but I had still been coming down from my 'awesome car' high. I was so star struck, in fact,that I didn't even realize it when Baralai pulled into my driveway. I squinted my eyes as I leaned forward to get a better look at the hood and almost hit my head on the roof when I saw a shadow out of the corner of my eye.

Baralai was leaning on the doorframe with a mischievous look in his eyes. One corner of his mouth curled up as he followed my line of sight. "What are you staring at?" He asked, a hint of laughter in his voice, as he opened the door to help me out.

"Those…holes in the hood. What are they?" I flinched as he swung my legs out of the car and pulled me up.

He chuckled as he wrapped his arm securely around my waist; the blush that colored my cheeks could have been seen from a mile away. "Those are called channels. They provide down force for the front tires. They're the equivalent of a wing. Here, let me show you something." He carefully propped me up on the side of the car next to the door then, instead of going towards the front, he walked towards the back and opened a compartment directly behind the cab. "This is a mid-engine car so it needs channels in the hood instead of a wing to provide the correct amount of down force to keep the car on the road."

I had to physically hold my jaw shut to prevent it from dropping open again. I decided then and there that I was going to persuade him somehow to let me take it for a spin. His whole engine compartment was spotless. It looked like he had just driven it off the lot. Well he had been grounded for a while. He's probably had more than enough to time to keep it maintained. "Do you have any idea how jealous I am right now?" I asked as I leaned forward to get a better look.

He chuckled underneath his breath and carefully shut the hatch. "Yeah, I could tell as soon as I saw your expression back at the hospital. It was my sixteenth birthday present." He tapped a button on his keychain and the horn chirped once, signaling that the alarm was set. "If you don't mind I'd like to pull my car into the garage once I have you settled. A nice car like that never goes unnoticed."

I nodded. "Sure, I'll find my extra garage door opener." My breath caught in my throat as my conversation with Baralai took my concentration away from walking and the toe of my right foot caught itself on the edge of my doorstep. I instinctively reached for him, the thought of falling causing me to grind my teeth together, but his strong hands had already wrapped firmly around my upper arms. I took a couple deep breaths to calm my racing heart then gently patted one of his hands. "Thank you. I'm okay now."

The pressure on my arms lessened and I began to move forward once again, thinking he was letting me go, but I gasped audibly when I felt his breath on my neck. Goosebumps popped up all over my neck and I didn't fight the shiver that travelled down my spine. Before I even realized what I was doing I tilted my head to the right so he could move closer to me. I blanched at my reaction, shocked that I had done something like that. Just as I was about to correct my lapse in judgment I felt his breath blow across my ear, effectively holding me in place and making my chest shudder.

"I'll just have to help you work on walking and talking at the same time then huh?" He inquired, his voice a low, husky whisper that was making my stomach do somersaults.

"Yeah, that sounds good," I replied, unable to hide the waver in my voice as I stepped away from him as quickly as I possibly could.

As soon as I passed through the threshold of my front door and entered my house for the first time in what felt like an eternity the first thing I wanted to do was lay down on the floor and smell the carpet. There were no words I could use that would express how happy and relieved I was to finally be back home. I had missed my bed, my couch, my shower. I knew from now on to never take a home cooked meal for granted. You never know when you might have to go on a strict diet of dried meat, bread, mountain grown mushrooms and water. I didn't have to look at myself in a mirror to know that I had lost weight.

"I'm pretty sure you want a shower, right?" Baralai asked innocently as he closed the door behind him.

"Yeah, I do." I froze as his question fully sank in and turned towards him apprehensively. The nurses at the hospital had given me sponge baths and the thought of Baralai doing that made my whole neck and face flare an unsightly bright red. I nervously swallowed the lump that had settled in my throat and tried to act nonchalant. "I don't have to keep getting sponge baths do I?"

Baralai's jaw dropped open when he caught the meaning behind my question. I could tell he was just as embarrassed as I was. "Um, ye – I mean, no!" He stammered in exasperation. "The doctor said you can shower by yourself as long as the incision isn't submerged. I'll redo your dressing once you get out." As soon as he was finished speaking he beat a hasty retreat back out the front door, more than likely to wait for his own blush to fade.

I carefully made my way back to my room using the wall for support. When I saw my bed the only thing I wanted to do was lay down in it and inhale the familiar scent of my sheets for a little while. I was on the brink of giving into temptation when I heard my shower calling my name. For only a few seconds I was torn between my bed and my shower but, in the end, the shower won. I quickly grabbed a spare set of clothes before rushing into my bathroom like I was on a time limit.

I climbed out of the shower almost forty-five minutes later, much happier than when I had gotten in. The hot water had helped my back muscles relax and that did wonders for my healing vertebrae. Baralai had checked on me a few times to make sure I was doing and when I dropped the soap bar he came running in like his heels were on fire thinking I had fallen. I thanked Shiva for the frost glass of my shower doors and the obscene amount of steam filling the room or else he would have seen a lot more than he meant to. He apologized up and down before running back out, quickly closing the door behind him.

After I was fully dressed with my back brace strapped back in place I emerged from my bedroom, combing my fingers through my wet hair. I could hear Baralai rooting around in the kitchen, more than likely familiarizing himself with the layout. I felt an odd twisting sensation in my gut when the thought that he would be living with me possibly for the rest of the school year popped up in my mind. I knew already that nothing good would come from this. I couldn't explain my feelings towards him and, frankly, I didn't want to I was almost willing to go as far as to say that I didn't want those feelings at all but I knew that was a lie. I sighed when he came into view, standing in front of the fridge and looking through my meager provisions. I felt my shoulder droop, wondering if I could really trust him.

I quickly regained my composure and tried to pretend that I was having a difficult time when he saw me. He smiled then quickly joined my side, guiding me over to my small dining room table so I could sit down. "Well I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" He asked as he went back to the fridge and continued looking through it.

"I don't really care," I replied, trying to cross my legs but realizing too late that wasn't such a good idea.

"Alright, bad news first then. Most of the food in your fridge has gone bad."

"Well I could have guess that one."

"Yeah, but the good news is we get to go shopping for groceries."

"You like to shop?" I asked incredulously. He didn't look like the shopping type at all.

"Oh yeah, especially when it comes to food," he replied with a half-smile.

I rolled my eyes. Typical guy, I thought. I should have known that one too. Tidus and Gippal were the same exact way. It was a nightmare when all of us went out to eat at a buffet. Those two could pack away obscene amounts of food. It was unbelievable how much they could eat. "Okay then. Write up a list and we'll go to the store."

So two hours and over five hundred gil later we were finally on our way back to my house. We had already decided from the get go that we were going to split the cost of all the food and, even though I had a small fortune tucked away in my bank account, I was still flabbergasted by how much we had spent. The small storage compartment in the front of his car was filled to capacity as well as my side of the car. I can only imagine what other people were thinking when they saw a head sticking out of all the plastic bags. Baralai had to be one of those that went food shopping hungry; whenever he saw something he liked he grabbed it. When we went to check out we had almost three full carts – including the basket on my little buzz cart – and I wished I had a paper to put over my head. Of course all the store employees and other shoppers knew me, practically everyone in Luca and half of Spira did. It only made it worse when he told the unlucky clerk that we were having a wild party. I could have died of embarrassment right there.

All he did was laugh when I told him that I was going to kill him.

It was two weeks later when the situation between us was given a violent shove from awkward to intensely interesting.

Before I get into that though… After the first couple days I became shocked by how easy it was to live with him. He kept up on the housework better than I did before my accident and even helped me with dinner. By the way, we had bought so much food that we wouldn't need to go shopping again at least for two months, but with the way that Baralai ate I wasn't sure if we would even make it that long. He was just like Tidus and Gippal in the aspect that he could eat all he wanted and not gain a pound. He would make a fortune if he could bottle his metabolism.

Anyways, he told me after about a week that his parents had to fight with him to get him to do housework. I couldn't help but feel just a teensy bit special but didn't waste any time in telling him that when he went back to his own house that he needed to pretend that I was there just so he would help his parents. He laughed and said that would be hard.

Anyways, after our most recent 'situation', I had locked myself in my bathroom to try and screw my head back on because Baralai had literally blown it off.

I had just gotten out of the shower and had forgotten to turn on the fan so the bathroom was filled with steam. I opened the door so all the heat could escape, not even thinking about my current housemate. I thought I had closed my bedroom door but, of course, I had forgotten that as well. Baralai knows that whenever I open my bathroom or bedroom door after I take a shower I'm decent enough for him to come check on me.

Tonight that was not the case.

I was completely naked in front of my mirror drying my hair with my towel when I heard his soft footfalls crossing the small space of carpet in between my bedroom door and my bathroom. Everything around me suddenly began moving in slow motion like it did in the movies sometimes. I could remember exactly what happened even it should have been moving too fast for me to comprehend. I ripped the towel away from my head and tried moving out of his line of sight at the same time, which turned out to be a very bad idea.

Since I didn't have my back brace on the sudden movement sent my back into painful spasms that made me lose my footing on the slick tile. I remembered looking down at the floor and thinking about how much hitting the floor was going to hurt when I felt Baralai's arms wrap around me. There was about two seconds of feeling suspended before he unceremoniously lost his balance and crashed to the floor. I cried out when my head smacked the floor, causing flashes of light to burst behind my eyes. My toes twitched as sharp stabs from my back travelled down my legs.

"Are you okay?" Baralai asked, his eyes wide with fear. I could detect a frantic tone in his voice.

I nodded, unconcerned about my back or the throbbing in my head. Those trivial things didn't concern me; it was the horrifying realization that I was lying on the floor naked with Baralai on top of me. My towel had managed to conceal at least a small amount of my dignity but that was irrelevant. Baralai's eyes kept flitting up and down, the same realization more than likely running circles through his mind. I was frozen in place, too scared to do anything but stare wide eyes up at him like a chocobo caught in the head lights.

I was even scared to breathe. His chest was flush against mine and every time I took a breath I could feel his heart racing from its place in his ribcage. I could hear my own heart thrumming a beat similar to his and I knew without a doubt that, if I could feel his, he could feel mine as well. I tried to think of something, anything, that I could say that would help dispel this but I couldn't get my brain to cooperate.

That's when weird thoughts started filtering into my head. The same thoughts, in fact, that I had every time I was a little too close to him. Just one whiff of his cologne was enough to send my senses into a frenzy. Those ridiculous commercials about women being drawn to man only because of his cologne were really starting to make sense. It was almost like I was intoxicated by it and the scary part was I loved it. I really shouldn't be so close to him. It's bad for my health, I thought as I felt myself relax almost against my will.

My breath caught in my throat when he shifted his weight. My hands tightened into claws, the tips of my fingers grasping at the tile beneath me. He moved closer to me, his pupils shrinking into tiny circles, and I tipped my head back a fraction. I knew what he was going to but this time I wanted it. I couldn't even put to words how much I wanted him to kiss me. I could feel the yearning bubbling in the pit of my stomach, steadily driving me insane. It was like he was moving slow on purpose, like he knew what I wanted and was taking delight in torturing me.

That's when I decided to take matters into my own hands. I thrust my right hand up, fisted it into his hair and slammed his mouth down onto mine. His sharp intake of breath through his nose and the way his body stiffened against mine told me that he hadn't been expecting me to make such a bold move. He recovered quickly though and wasted no time in returning my kiss with just as much fervor. One of his hands began crawling up my side and I almost stopped him but the more carnal side of me forbid it. All of my inhibitions were steadily disappearing every second I continued kissing him the funny thing about it was that I wanted that and needed it in the worst way.

I was tired of having to guard my heart like a fortress. I'd been doing it for so long that I couldn't even remember when I had started. Rikku had told me once if I never put my heart on the line I was never going to find "the one". And dammit, she was absolutely right. I was a fool to think that I was above having my heart broken. I was still in high school. I could start worrying about if Baralai was Mr. Right after we graduate. So, with that new mindset, I deepened our kiss and buried both hands into his hair, figuring he wasn't going to mind if I mess it up a little. A moment later I reluctantly pulled my hands out of his hair and dragged them slowly down the sides of his face and down his neck until they came to rest on his shoulders. I let them explore every plane of his back and marveled at how muscular he was. For a second I actually thought I was having a very good dream. That is, until I realized that, before now, I had never thought – or dreamed of for that matter – of doing anything like this.

A myriad of shivers shot down my spine when he ran his tongue across my top lip before sucking it into his mouth, causing me to dig my nails into his shoulders. He moaned then, low and in his throat, and I suddenly felt the urge to be a little more daring. I carefully hooked my left leg around his right then slowly pulled it up his body until it was wrapped snugly around his waist. He responded by grasping my thigh and gently kneading the soft flesh. His mouth moved away from mine and travelled to my neck, planting soft kisses all over my heated skin and even going as far as gently sucking on the space where my shoulder joined my neck. One of my hands returned to his to his head, my fingers once again burying themselves in the soft down that was his hair and clutching him like my life depended on it.

Then, before I could even comprehend what was going on, he had lifted me off the floor and set me in his lap. My right leg immediately copied my left, pulling our bodies just that much closer together. The fact that I was naked in his lap with only a towel between us no longer mattered to me; he could have taken me right then and I wouldn't have cared. He continued to ravage my neck and I tightly gripped his shoulders as I arched my back, earning a half-moan, half-growl from Baralai. But then he pulled away from my neck and that's when our gazes met for the first time since all of this started. As soon as I saw his lust filled gaze my mind came to a screeching halt. I gasped and, even though my back protested loudly, I pushed away from him while wrapping my towel securely around me. I scurried away from him almost like I was frightened of him and the ramifications of what I had almost allowed myself to do hit me full in the face.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, wishing I could look away from him but unable to take my eyes off of his face. "I'm sorry. I can't."

I heard him breathe in deeply. "It's alright. I should be the one apologizing. I just didn't want you to get hurt." His clothes rustled together as he got up and his footsteps disappeared down the hall. The sound of his door closing a second later echoed through the house.

I stayed there on the floor a few moments longer, the only thing I could hear was my heavy breathing and my racing heart. A sense of foreboding buried itself in my stomach as I wondered if I had just made a very big mistake by rejecting him so harshly. I let out choked gasp as I pulled myself up with the help of the bathroom counter. My feet felt like lead weights as I stumbled towards the door, peeking my head out to make sure the coast was clear before carefully shutting the door and locking it. I pressed my back up against the cold wood and felt the burn of tears as my vision blurred. I wiped my eyes though and got dressed, trying to block the hurt that I saw in Baralai's eyes before he left. I stood like a statue in front of the mirror, the last ten minutes replaying over and over in my head.

And that's what I've been doing for the past hour. My brain was on auto-pilot; I didn't even know what to think. I kept asking myself why I had stopped. I hadn't even meant to. My instincts had taken over to the point where I no longer had control of my body. Once I had seen that rejected look in his eyes – the eyes that I had come to love – I knew I had made a huge mistake. I was currently torn between two options: going to him and finishing what we had started or just going to bed. I wanted to go to him but I couldn't bring myself to walk out of my bathroom and I had no idea why. Every time I thought of what he had made me feel while he was kissing me made me want much, much more. I sighed in defeat and gently combed my fingers through my hair.

"To hell with it," I said, giving into my feelings and walking towards his room. I sighed in relief when I saw that the light in his room was still on and assumed that he was still awake. At least that's what I was hoping. I just about lost my nerve once I was outside his door but I quickly knocked on it before I had the chance to second guess myself. "Baralai? Are you awake?"

When I didn't hear a response I almost turned around and went back to my room, my bravery hanging by a thread, but instead I pushed the door open to prevent myself from running away. When I saw him awake, lying on his bed and staring at the ceiling, the realization that he had purposefully ignored me both angered and disappointed me. I knew he was angry at me but that didn't help the rejection that was building up in my chest. Is this how I made him feel? I asked myself, regretting ever hurting him. My actions earlier were the reason why he was angry so I had no place to be angry back at him. I could tell that he was forcing himself not to look at me, which made me feel even more disappointed and almost sad. I huffed and marched into the room. If he wasn't going to acknowledge me willingly then I was going to force him to look at me.

Instead of choosing to sit on and stand next to the bed I climbed up and straddled him, shooting him the best glare that I could and still look serious. He kept his face aggravatingly devoid of emotion for about ten seconds before a smile slowly spread across his face. He wrapped his hands around my hips and drew soft circles on my skin with his thumbs. "What took you so long?"

"I had to kick my own butt a couple times. Stuff like that takes a while," I replied, smiling a bit myself. Then I remembered why I had come into his room in the first place and got serious. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have stopped you." While I was saying this I leaned over him and circled my arms around his head. His fingers slipped under my tank top and began inching slowly up my back, becoming hesitant when he brushed over the healing incision. "Actually I shouldn't have stopped myself."

His hands continued their exploration. "Why did you?"

I didn't really want to tell him because I was kind of embarrassed about it. It was a lame excuse and I knew it. "This is going to sound really stupid. I saw the look in your eyes."

He frowned and his hands stopped moving. "What do you mean?"

"I could tell what you wanted by the look in your eyes and I guess it scared me."

"You guess?" He echoed, one of his dark eyebrows arching gracefully.

"I told you it was a stupid reason," I mumbled, playing with a strand of his to keep from looking at him.

"Hey," he said as he touched my cheek in an attempt to get my attention. I met his gaze hesitantly. "I know you have no reason to believe me but I would never use you then throw you away. I'm not like that."

I sighed and nodded, grabbing his hand so I could lace our fingers. "I know and I want you to know that I'm trying. I'm tired of having to guard my emotions all the time. Believe it or not, I wasn't always like this."

"I'm willing to put up with you, if you'll have me." He flashed a full smile at me then and somehow I knew I could trust him. I didn't quite know how but I did and that was all I cared about.

I hesitantly lowered my face towards his but stopped right before our lips touched. "Then I'm going to have to learn how to put up with, aren't I?"

His smile widened and he closed the miniscule distance between us, pulling me into a tender embrace. I sighed into his mouth and fisted my hands into his shirt, melting into his embrace. When he slowly began to strip my clothes off of me I didn't offer any kind of resistance and even helped to relieve him of his own clothes. That night easily took the top spot on my Best Night Ever list.

When I woke up that morning the smile that spread across my face was almost too big to comfortably fit on my mouth. Memories of the previous night came rushing back and I welcomed the warmth that they brought me. I reached toward where I knew Baralai would be but frowned in confusion when the space next to me was empty. I lifted my head off of the pillow and my frown deepened when he wasn't even in the room. I spied his shirt on the floor next to mine but his jeans were nowhere to be found. I was surprised that he had managed to get up and put his pants on without even waking me up.

That's when I smelled the coffee.

My smile broadened as I unwrapped the blankets from around me and got dressed, substituting his shirt for my own. I tried not to drool when I saw him shirtless. I hadn't really been interested in looking at his body the other night. I was preoccupied with kissing him. I would have never guessed how muscular he was when I first met him a month ago. I wouldn't have even pegged him as the Blitzball playing type. At first, it seemed like he was more book smart than anything.

My smile grew even wider when I saw that he was making breakfast. Even though him cooking breakfast in the morning had become a routine since he moved in now that we were considered 'together', if that's even what we are, made it feel different somehow. I realized a little too late that my hands were frigid when I touched his shoulders. He jumped then immediately turned around and wrapped his arms around me. The kiss we shared then was long and made my head spin.

"Good morning," he said, reaching behind him and handing me a steaming mug of coffee. "I knew you would be up as soon as you smelled this so I took the liberty of starting it for you. I'm not sure how much cream you like."

I kissed him again just to let him know how much I appreciated the gesture. "Many thanks," I said, opening my fridge to get the cream.

He came to stand behind me while I stirred in my cream and left soft trails of kisses down my neck and shoulder. It felt like my lips were turned up into a permanent smile and it actually felt good to be so happy again. I leaned into his embrace and reveled in my newfound freedom, letting my eyes slide shut as he worked his magic. I was just about to turn around and kiss him when a sharp knock came out of nowhere. I frowned and looked at Baralai, finding my expression mirrored on his face. I swiftly pulled his shirt off and handed it back to him.

"If you don't mind answering that I'll be right back. I don't think I should be answering the door in your clothes."

He chuckled as I walked away. "I guess I have no choice now, do I?"

Instead of grabbing the shirt that I had discarded in his room the previous night I went into my room to find a bra and different shirt. Since I was in the back of the house I didn't hear what Baralai said when he answered the door. I'm glad because the scene that I saw in front of me as I made my way back into the living room almost made my legs give out.

A short brunette was climbing all over an angry Baralai like he was a jungle gym inside my house. My anger flared so hot that I saw red. My body started moving forward without my permission and that's when I blacked out.