Never again!
Author's note: yeah, I wrote this since I wondered how Sideways would react to finding out what he finds out in this chapter. It's mostly random after he wakes up in the medbay...won't say anymore, just read for yourself!
Today, Tai was so moody, being randomly happy, then sad, then pissed off and spending a lot of time in the bathroom and once had to ask Peaches to get her "tampons", which the Pretender was happy to do.
"Peaches, what are those things?" her sparkmate asked after she had come back from doing that.
The red and orange femme replied "They are human girl things and that is all you need to know."
"Does this have anything to do with how Tai has been acting?" Sideways asked, a bit confused.
"Yes. Don't you dare find out more; you will regret it." Peaches stated in an "I'm warning you" tone of voice.
Sideways just shrugged and walked off. Why would he not want to find out more? He would do so anyways…
A few hours later after an argument with Devastator which had to be stopped by Optimus Prime, Peaches was alone and calmed down. She was in her human form and walking her dog Snowball around the beach when she heard a crash. When she went over to look, she immediately got worried.
"Ratchet, Sideways fainted!" she shouted.
Ratchet and Jolt came over and lifted the unconscious ex-Con and took him into the medical bay. Peaches followed them but was locked out and had to wait.
"Damn it guys, he better be okay!" she screamed. "Mentally, that is…" she quickly added.
The Pretender assumed that her sparkmate had done something she had told him not to do and as it turned out an hour later, was correct.
"Peaches, he's fine, just a bit shocked. " Ratchet said. "You may go in and see him now."
The orange and red femme did so and asked "Did you look up what I told you NOT to find out more about?"
Sideways was reluctant to admit it. "Yeah I looked up 'tampons', then 'menstrual cycle'…" He almost fainted again but was still conscious enough to say "That was…disgusting doesn't even begin to describe it."
"And now you know what every human female goes through once a month; that was the one of the many things I never had to go through but I do know what it is having had to learn it in health class in high school." Peaches said. "I'm disappointed that you tried to understand something only meant to be understood by that select group of humans."
"Now I wish I didn't know…" the blue mech muttered.
Peaches then grinned evilly. "That time of the month also prepares human girls"-she dragged him out of the medbay and into their quarters and locked the door-"for this."
"Don't do this!"Sideways shouted to the Pretender as she forced him onto the berth and got on top of him.
"Oh, I will interface with you. I think it's the perfect punishment." She stated, as the two carried on with their "business" with Sideways screaming and refusing to give in for a very long time…
Two hours later, Arcee had gone to find Peaches. "Abby needs her bottle, Peach." The pink femme said, and then she tried to override the lock on the door.
"Leave us be….energon cookies!" Sideways groaned then randomly shouted, then went back into recharge.
"I don't want to know…" Arcee immediately walked away to tell Tai that the latter needed to take care of Abby for a bit longer…
Author's note: Yeah, Peaches idea for a "punishment" wasn't the best thing I could come up with but it was kind of more random than anything else in this one shot. Don't know if Peaches and Sideways should have their own "biological" (for lack of a better term) sparkling.