Sorry for the late update! My parents are being so protective of me that they don't want to be exposed to too much radiation. And sometimes..i kinda feel lazy. Anyway..hope you'll enjoy this chapter.
I cannot consider this as a NatsuMikan chapter..uhm..but the last part..they have their scenes so please read until the end. Thank you!
After 3 days in distress, Mikan finally woke up from an almost forever lethargic condition. Opening her eyes, and adjusting with the bright light that welcomed her and the new surroundings of the area where she was and the feeling of the softness of the bed where she was laid, she immediately searched for Persona. Well, since she was sleeping, she felt like she had just undergone a murky nightmare and that the moment she opened her eyes,,the reality hasn't changed..that Persona's shadows would be the first feature she would see and it was better to be ready as always. But her rumbling mind stopped panicking when she had seen those white curtains..the white blanket, the white tiles and the white wall and felt the white wind coming from the air-conditioner. Was she already in heaven? Everything was white..except herself and she doesn't have any wings to be an angel..for the completion. Her eyes had cope up with the seemingly new surroundings and they revealed the figures of Yuka, Narumi, Kaoru, Tsubasa and Misaki, and her classmates. No sign of Natsume's presence and aura but she didn't seem to notice it. This was not the right time to notice it. Her circumstance might become worse.
Come to think of it, even if she noticed it, would she be shocked? Never did Natsume care for her, so it wouldn't be something if he wouldn't be there. She could have doubted if Natsume would even care to know what happened to her being absent for few days ( she was not aware of the number).
She's not that important to him…she may never become one. She's nothing to him. Huh, nothing..but only the worst.
Seeing that Mikan had become more conscious, Yuka started prattling if Mikan was feeling well. And with her high-pitched tone, Mikan sure was startled.
" Oh..Mikan…I'm very glad, you've already awoken, don't make me worry again. I don't know what would I do if I would lose you again," and with that she hugged her tightly, bestowing her all the affection she has for her. She promised herself she would do that more often.
Mikan hugged her back..this is the most thing she would miss if ever she was forced to aboard the train in the "departure area." Even if, sometimes..Yuka is being mean to her…shoving her to be what she doesn't want to be..and making her carry out the mission she detests the most..she still loves her. She waited for life just to meet her mother. And that's one of the innumerable proofs how strong and resilient the bond of a mother and daughter is.
Next to speak..was the one she has been considering as an aunt..not blood-related nor business-related, but perhaps bonded by a peripheral force that attached them to each other.
" Oh,,yes..Mikan-chan..happy to see you're ok..I apologize for Natsume's sense of irresponsibility, he should be with you when-,"
By just mentioning the name, Mikan, though aware of the fact that it's a disrespect to suddenly butt in while one especially an older person is delivering her line, but in this case..it's a predestined necessity.
" Uhm..thank you..Kaoru-san," she was suppressed for awhile she considers her as an aunt. Does it automatically require her to call her Aunt Kaoru? It's kinda clichéd. What would Natsume think if he hears that? That she is feeling close with her mom..when they don't have any relationship at all aside from being classmates and seatmates? Hedging her bets, she decided to use the polite expression.. –san.
And then she continued, " Iie, uhm..it's ok..even if Natsume wasn't there..anyway it's not really his responsibility to be with me and protect me. It's my fault for being careless," she explained..though every word maims her. In any moment, this may accumulate up to the point it can no longer be sequestered until it kills her.
Oh..the right time arrived. She finally noticed that Natsume wasn't around. Good, or else..they would again fight and that would adversely affect her plan. Not really a plan..but she is planning to distant herself from Natsume gradually so as to put a discontinuity in the rope tying them, then as it gets bigger..it will form a gap..eventually there will come a time..it will finally break. And if she would do her part quickly then in no time..the rope would be………
Narumi being mindful of Mikan's blend of emotions decided to interrupt before she cries.
" Next time, Mikan-chan, don't go alone by yourself..ok?" he cautioned her..like a father reprimanding her daughter for walking off alone at the middle of the night.
Then Yuka informed Mikan about Narumi's heroism.
" He saved you from Persona, Mikan-chan," she beamed at her then she glanced at Narumi who was looking at her as well.
Mikan painted a wide range of a smile, Narumi really satiates her longing for a father, still she could never forget her one and only father.
" Narumi-sensei, I owe you my life! Thank you!" Narumi approached her and patted her head like saying telepathically " No problem, Mikan-chan,"
Next was Hotaru.
" Oi, baka..what were you thinking, fighting with Persona? You're making me have wrinkles. Anyway, I'm happy to see you alive, it's boring if my best friend is not around..no idiotic victim for me to play with," and then she grinned sheepishly. But after that she smiled, really relieved to see her sitting up straight on the bed than lying there like the clock stopped for good.
Mikan cannot be that dense when she's infront of Hotaru. She knows her that much..even if she's like that..she can still understand her. Now she knows what she means..she cares for her. And she's thinking that maybe what happened to her is not that bad after all, Hotaru rarely shows her actions of concern to Mikan..and good thing, this situation made that feeling of Hotaru to tower out.
Yes, she can still get a grasp of Hotaru's feelings unlike with Natsume's..very unpredictable. Or maybe she doesn't have that high aptitude to comprehend Natsume's actions. But it doesn't really matter.
" Oh, thank you..Hotaru..you're really my best friend," she replied with so much gratefulness.
" Sakura-san..are you really feeling okay now? Be more careful next time." Ruka then asked at the same time advised her.
Mikkan thought for a jiffy that Ruka is such a pleasant guy..really. He's very gentle, loving, caring, handsome, and also a smart one. He possesses all the ideal characteristics of a guy every girl dreams of. And she also concluded that Hotaru would sure be lucky to have him, if Hotaru's indifference will be disregarded. Until now..Hotaru does nothing but to invent sophisticated machines and earn money. She can only care about her outside world if some imbalances would be happening like in Mikan's case. But caring about the world beyond the reality..but beneath the fantasy..the world of Love..well..she has never got that far.
" Hai! Ruka-pyon..i'm feeling fine, thank you!" And then she tittered.
How comforting it is to answer questions like these…concerning about yourself..your condition..your state of feeling. How relaxing it is to feel like everybody around your circle is loving you.
" Kouhai, glad you're still alive!" Tsubasa then made his way to talk to Mikan.
Instead of Mikan replying, Misaki stole the chance.
Spanking Tsubasa's head, she jeered, " Of course, she would still be alive!"
Tsubasa retorted while rubbing his head," I'm just kidding!"
Those two really make a cute couple. They both have authentic sense of humor. Well..their friendship has been progressing and even if no words are being spoken because they both preferred it to be that way, it's obvious..they are entering the next level.
" Next time, mikan-chan..call me if you want to fight with him so that I can protect you," Tsubasa added like he is the hero of everybody..you know like Superman..but Superman never have a star beside his left eye. ( no offense).
Again…Misaki reacted, " Don't fool around, Tsubasa,,you can't even protect yourself.. if not for your shadow manipulation..you would be hospitalized for a year. Anyway, Mikan-chan, take care, ne!"
Tsubasa could just be a servile when it comes to Misaki speaking. It is a bit true, he can't really protect himself. Unlike Misaki..her words can already scare away her enemies even those who are willing to fight with him. Nevertheless, he cares for Misaki a lot..and he would do everything to protect her.
Mikan again giggled about that scene.
" Hai! Thank you Misaki-senpai, Tsubasa-senpai!" she replied vividly.
And then the whole class asked her if she's feeling okay..or if anything hurts: Same questions, different emotions or different questions, same emotions.
After few moments, the whole class left telling her that Jinno-sensei is really strict and terror..giving them a forty-page assignment. Hotaru, brilliant as she is, she let her robot, the one she made resembling her in every manner, do the assignment, and now the assignment was finished. Narumi said he still had works to be done and that he would just come for a visit if ever he would have a vacant time, while Kaoru also said that she had some unfinished business..actually she had an appointment with someone..with her manicurist and she couldn't just admit it of course.
Yuka stayed longer but Mikan seeing her mother tired, she insisted her to at least take her rest.
She couldn't withstand seeing her mother groggy because of almost sleepless nights waiting for her to even have a blink. And now that she's already 18, she herself would still be fine even if she's alone. And that's what she reasoned out to her mom to persuade her.
" Mother, it's okay now, don't worry anymore, take your rest or else I'll be mad at you!" she added while threatening her with a playful voice. She knows her mother's weakness, Mikan herself.
Yuka could just chuckle. Mikan's liveliness is coming back.
" Hai..hai..okay..sure? Want me to leave you?" she asked her for reassurance.
" Yes, mother!" and she nodded.
With that, they exchanged goodbyes.
And Yuka exited the door which was at the right side of Mikan meaning it wouldn't be that easy to see the person entering and exiting the door right away without glancing to see it with your own eyes.
Mikan decided to grab a magazine from the piled up collections on the table next to her bed. And there, she started browsing..not really reading..just admiring the beautiful models in their great poses.
After five minutes, the door clicked open. It seemed like Yuka forgot to lock it for her. Mikan, assuming that was her mother..she didn't glance to see the person for welcoming. It was her mother anyway..as what she was thinking.
And then she put aside the magazine and sighed in frustration, Yuka sure was quite firm. Her body needed a complete rest and still she did nothing but to worry about Mikan. Okay, there was nothing wrong with that..since she is her daughter..it's normal. But at least care for herself, too..right?
With that she again advised her.
" Mother..you should be------," and now she was cut.
" Oi..Polka..," And she turned her head to her right to meet the eyes of Natsume.
Now..destiny is really irreversible. She didn't remember wishing Natsume to visit her. What a narrow escape from the reality. For once, she needed a peace of mind and she could be able to do that while she was there..staying there in the hospital wherein she believed Natsume wouldn't go to..especially if she would be the reason. Well, there's one exception: if he would be the one to be hospitalized or maybe her mother or someone special to him and she's definitely excluded from the list.
But now..here he was..ready to bring havoc to her life.
And she could just mutter under her breath," Oh………Natsume,"
And now she was thinking: Was there a speck of chance that Natsume was indeed worry about her?
" I see, this was the stupid thing you did next, fighting alone with Persona? Hn. What are you trying to prove?"
And she never get wrong. He was there to ruin every sane thought she had. What was his problem anyway? Is she that despicable for him to throb anytime he wants? And was that even stupid? She tried her might just to have a fight with Persona and win over him then after that.. mission accomplished, they would be free for good. And is it her fault to be a "weak" human?
And most especially, she never wished to fight alone with Persona. It was true she had the second thought of running away when they had encountered but can Natsume blame her for trying to be strong and worthy of his attention? And what did he expect her to do? She was alone that time. Was there a need to call him?
" It was your fault for leaving me alone when I needed you..," she thought wishing her facial expression could convey the message to this callous guy. Her face was so pale and wistful.
Yes, she did want to cry. After the pain inflicted by Persona..here she was again facing another one who was again ready to mete out a deeper pain to her. Oh…doesn't she have the right to recover?
Instead of crying, she snapped, " Hell..Natsume..if you're just going to tell me that I'm stupid then better go out of my room, you're not helping me to feel better," she glared at him.
Tch. Wrong move. She knew very well, he was not there to help her feel better. Why on earth did she even say it?
" Who told you I want to make you feel better? Never," Oh..there another second of rejection has just passed by Mikan.
Natsume really could only give a cold comfort..crap..no comfort at all.
She could foretell, the next scene would be her playing the leading role..crying and she hates that..especially now..she was infront of Natsume.
" Ugh! I'm telling you Natsume, get out! And please for one whole week, don't ever make me see your face, jerk!"
She could only mean those words for one whole week..not for a lifetime. She couldn't. Well.. even if Natsume would be happy not to see her for the rest of his life, it would be the other way for Mikan.
Natsume sort of cringed. Even if he has that stone heart, he can also receive pain..he can also feel it. And I wonder, did he ever think that if someone like him with a pure stone heart could be affected by pain..what more if that same pain would be wreak to someone like Mikan who has a very soft and sensitive heart? Will he be able to take back all the pain he has given away..especially to Miakn? These kinds of questions have never crossed his mind yet.
If Mikan wanted an argument..ok..now he was on it.
" Hn. Better luck next time, baka. Try making some improvements cause until now..you're still the worst," Again, he emphasized his favorite phrase. With that remark, he decided to leave. He was already opening the door when..
" I'm trying to prove that I'm not the worst like what you think Natsume," she said in a cold, serious tone.
With that, Mikan turned to the other side..and decided to have a rest, not wanting to know what would be Natsume's expression. She had enough of that unreadable face of Natsume.
Little did she know, before Natsume shut the door..completely leaving,
" Sorry..for that..," he whispered guilt-ridden and very softly that maybe even him wouldn't be able to hear if he really did not mean it.
And so for one whole week, Natsume didn't see her because she was still bedridden. It took her a long time to recover considering the fact that Natsume gave her an additional millstone by just telling and clarifying to her that he was never made to make her feel better.
One day, he was just shocked to see Mikan already seated at her place..there beside him. And he couldn't believe his eyes. Was that she for real? Or maybe a replica made by his own wishing eyes? He made a move to prove it.
" So, you're already here? Nice recovering," he teased not really having the intention of making her feel like she was not welcome there anymore.
The girl infront him had a face devoid of any clear expression.
And then she replied, " If you don't want me here, fine, I'm leaving," with her voice resonating the remnants of the pain from her yesterdays.
She never gave Natsume a chance to speak another word so she stood and walked away..proceeding to the empty space beside Hotaru. Hotaru's seatmate was not yet there luckily. At least, she could see..there was still an empty space for her to fit in aside from the world she was trying to infiltrate to be a small part of it.
" Good, I'm not dreaming..it's her," Natsume thought while smiling that no one has seen yet. His subject for teasing is now present. Finally, he'll have a good day.
But wait..something's wrong.
" Is she mad? At me?" and then he tried another move to confirm his hypothesis.
" Hn. Just make sure you're not coming back," he told her coldly.
Being familiar with Mikan, he expected her to rejoin and have a spat but she didn't. He didn't receive any word from Mikan as she continued walking until she finally sat down beside Hotaru alarming the latter a bit. But seeing Mikan's weird mood, she decided to delay her questioning.
Natsume raised his eyebrow, having a hard time absorbing the current situation.
" What's wrong with her?"
There..i don't know when will be my next update..classes will resume soon so I may not have enough time to type. Anyway..i'll still try my best. Sorry for any inconsistency in my grammar..quite confused what tense should I use..and I was not able to edit this chapter except for those typographical errors. And it was due to time constrain.