Authors Note: How's this for a quick update? Hopefully it pleases. I'm not very happy with the middle description of the investigation team, doing what investigation teams do. I decided to actually describe them doing specific tasks because I just felt I couldn't keep referring to them doing just plain and vague 'work' on computers and stuff...
I think I've gone and made the whooole original investigation team alive as well - a stoopid mistake but just...ignore and accept it.
I can't believe how much there is of this so far and indeed how much there is still to be done...I've planned out a lot of it, including the difficult business of how they are going to actually bring an end the Kira Investigation, which was so very hard and complicated and there are still a couple of matters I want to straighten out.
There's still a great deal more of this to go yet so keep reading and please please do keep reviewing! Reading the reviews make me so happy, it's what makes writing this story so worthwhile!!
Thoughts and transgressions.
Light lent forward and let the water run over his skin, flowing over his body, dripping from his fingertips and into the drain. It was ten past eight.
L had arranged for new clothes for him to be bought in preparation before last night. He knew that Light didn't like to wear the same clothes for two consecutive days. It was a fact he had become acquainted with during their time chained together, one which, of course, drew a complete contrast with his own attitude. Light was not surprised when L had told him that he had arranged for clothes to be bought for him, he knew that the man had always intended to keep him incarcerated for the night. Although Light also knew that the reasons for this were entirely separate from the circumstances that had in fact unfolded.
Light ran his fingers through his hair harshly and methodically as he washed the soap out. In the light that trespassed through the hallway's glass windows Light had seen the brightness of the day that had been obscured in that windowless room. It confirmed to him the reality of the dawn, of the morning, of the rest of the city, of Tokyo sprawled out beneath him, full of people living and dying. He knew that he couldn't let his mind draw in upon itself any longer and he let himself think.
He had walked through the hallways with L largely in silence as they strayed back into the parts of the building inhabited by mechanical eyes. L had escorted him to the bathroom that Light was familiar with from the time of metal-link bonds and then he had given him a little distance, making a call to Watari. He had stood outside the room, underneath the glare of cameras, while Light threw off the clothes that he had only pulled on for the journey. Even though it had only been for the benefit of the cameras he had made certain that he looked perfectly presentable as he usually did. He had been irritated that there was no mirrors in the room and was worried about neat his hair was and whether it would betray him. He and L had used each other as mirrors, standing opposite each other and arranging each other's hair and clothes so that they looked as normal as possible. They knew each other's appearance down to the finest detail and completed the task perfectly.
From the other side of the bathroom door, which L had carefully left slightly open, Light heard L telling Watari that all camera and security operations should be restored. He gave him some other instructions also, although nothing majorly important, as usual the trivial demands that L would make of his patron, in this case largely related to the matter of breakfast.
Light had heard the door open and L slip into the bathroom after the call and he could see him through the frosted glass, standing to one side, waiting.
"You can always join me if you wish," Light offered over the sound of the roaring water. He saw L's form, distorted through the glass and the trickling water, turn and shake his head then turn away to take the seat in the corner of the room. Light didn't read anything much into L's decline of his offer assuming that the man wished to pull himself away from Light now and be alone to think. Light breathed in the heat and steam of the cleansing water and let himself enjoy it, just for a short moment.
He finished his shower quickly, not wishing to waste time, and stepped out into the bathroom to join his friend. The towels hung on hooks beside the shower and Light took one to wrap around himself and another for his hair. He usually towled his hair only a little and then blow-dried it dry. L had stared at him incredulously and with open disgust-laced shock when he had first borne witness to Light drying his hair. He had said nothing but his wide-eyed expression made it clear that he felt that a hairdryer should be as alien and inappropriate an item to a man as lipstick.
L rose from his seat when Light crossed the room and stood regarding Light's pure, wet body for a moment, his fingers playing with his lips.
"Are there Cameras in this room?" Light inquired. He knew there did indeed used to be although that was when Light was under acute suspicion.
"There are not," L replied reassuringly, "only in the other room, and in there no audio surveillance, of course." Light nodded and turned to look at the clothes that L had prepared for him. They were laid out neatly on the counter and he could see from the label and quality that they had been expensive. He appreciated the effort and trouble. He ran his fingers over the smooth material of the shirt while he considered his thoughts.
"What do you want to do in regards to our relationship?" Light asked L, raising his eyes to the older man's, "should we make sure to conceal it from the investigation team, as an imperative?"
"I think we should act cautiously," L replied promptly, it seamed that he had already been debating the matter, "I think we should keep it private as a personal matter between the two of us, but not attempt to conceal or deny it drastically. I would not suggest that we announce it or volunteer the knowledge to anyone but I do not think we should deny it if asked or avoid it if relevant conversation arose. I do not mind if you feel it is appropriate to tell someone, I know that you will only do so if you judge the situation to ask for it. But," L stared intensely and his tone became a shade more focused, "whatever happens it must be clear that this is simply a personal and emotional relationship between the two of us and is irrelevant to work and the investigation. On no accounts may the matter of our relationship and the Kira Investigation be seen to be in any way connected."
"Yes," Light nodded, "yes I agree." L nodded slightly and then was still a moment more before reaching out to push back Light's wet hair, running his fingers through it. Light smiled warmly and lent forward to kiss his lover. L lent into the warm feel of Light's mouth and wrapped his arms around his neck.
The day ran relatively smoothly, Light seated himself and assembled all the necessary materials required to create the façade of studious work and exercise for the day, running through past statistics and evidence of killings for patterns in numbers and anomalies. This had been the area he had been exploring since the capture of Higuchi. In fact on whole there was no real difference between the uninterested pretence he had been maintaining before to the one he would be conducting now. In fact, if anything, Light was actually more engaged in the work at hand now as he was aware that he was going to have consider all factors when he and L made whatever monumental choices and plans they did.
Aizawa was the first to arrive and considered nothing strange about the fact that Light was there working early. He and Ide had been assigned the task of looking over all the physical evidence that they could gather from Yotsuba's buildings and Higuichi's properties in an attempt to track down the source by which he had obtained the notebook. Mogi was assisting this operation but also focusing specifically on video footage from both the capture and what they had obtained from Yotsuba's office's own surveillance cameras before, during and after the company had possessed the notebook. The three men arrived within a few minutes of each other and after the usual exchange of pleasantries started work.
Light's father was investigating all of the other members of Yotsuba and their actions and movements leading up to when they had obtained the notebook. Soichiro Yagami had entered as he usually did and greeted everyone politely but went over to his son immediately to anxiously confirm that he had not indeed been subjected to any type of torture or been otherwise hideously mistreated. A long look over his handsome and neat son, well-dressed and seated working comfortably was enough to reassure him and Light smiled and greeted his father pleasantly. The man smiled with relief and started work.
Matsuda was assigned specifically to assisting Mogi, largely employed in spending hours watching almost certainly useless footage that Mogi could not be bothered to. Matsuda was also just fulfilling any general tasks that might arise within the task force. He was, as usual, the last to arrive, a little late.
The day progressed smoothly and in the usual manner however after spending over half of the day in one corner at his computer, eating, L quietly arranged for the task force to be split between three separate rooms. The workspace was becoming untidy he reasoned and arranged for Ide, Aizawa and Mogi to have one room which was more equipped for analysis of evidence while he, Light and Yagami san remained in the main investigation room they had been using. Matsuda was banished, to his devastation, to an isolated visual room in which he could watch the tapes upon several screens. This seamed a logical move to make as surface space had been growing scarce and, apart from Matsuda, the members of the team accepted it readily without any question or objection.
After just over an hour had passed under this new arrangement however L had addressed Soichiro Yagami and requested that he might have a private discussion with him. This request appeared to be a truly horrific one to the man, judging from the expression upon his face when L had asked him. Light had narrowed his eyes as he watched them across the room in the reflection of the computer monitors however he tried to appear natural and unaffected when his father glanced across to look at him anxiously.
He left his work and rose to leave the room with L, the large heavy doors closing behind the two men, leaving Light in the large room alone.
"What exactly is this about, L?" Soichiro demanded impatiently the moment that they were in the small and comfortable room that L had picked out for the discussion.
"Please, Yagami san," L said in his soft, monotone voice, "don't be concerned." This advice, as usual when it was delivered from L, did not seem to achieve the desired effect. The man before him looked as if he was becoming increasingly tense by the moment and L watching this process, with his unnerving fixed stare, did not seam to be helping the matter.
"Please," he said gesturing to a chair, "do take a seat." With his eyes angrily fixed upon the young detective before him Soichiro complied. The situation was very similar to that when the investigation had first begun and L had insisted upon interrogating each member of the team in turn. L settled into his usual position in front of him, and rested his head against his knees in an almost child-like way for a few moments while he gathered his thoughts. There was a few moments of silence before L spoke.
"I got the impression that you were a little concerned when I requested that Light stay last night," he said, his black eyes flickering to the man before him, "I gather that it must be difficult for you to have a son so greatly involved within the investigation on such a precarious and unusual position within the team." The wording was very careful but both of the men knew that generally L was not one for tact and that he would say things openly and directly soon enough. Soichiro pushed up his glasses and lent forward, eyes upon the man before him intently. L's attention was upon his toes as he sat there as if he was oblivious to the charged emotion and atmosphere that the situation had brought forth.
"I want you to know," L said raising his eyes up to the older man's creased and tensed ones, "that I have been completely convinced of your son's innocence. I am now completely certain that Light is not and has never been Kira."
There was a slight pause in which the older man's mouth dropped open and then his body fell forward in a great sigh and he ran his hands up over his face as the tension drained from his body. He actually almost laughed, a strange gasping noise of relief.
"I apologise for the stress and suffering that my investigations so far may have caused you and your family. I assure you that I only acted in the way which I considered right and appropriate given the apparent evidence and circumstances."
"You don't need to apologise," Soichiro replied, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose and massaging his temples, "you explained your reasons and justified yourself as we investigated. I did agree with them, largely, despite how they might affect me personally." L nodded slightly then leaned forward to rest his head upon his knee again and raise his fingers to his lips. There was a significant stretch of silence before L finally asked, quietly, his fingers still playing with his bottom lip,
"what would you have done if your son was Kira?" Soichiro looked up immediately, his face drawn in a pained and irritable expression,
"Please, you know I never liked that game, even when it mattered-"
"It still matters," L cut across him quickly, his voice suddenly dark and serious, "It is still something that I need to know. It is necessary. I can assure you that I am certain Light is not Kira but this is a fact that I need to know. It is still important, to the investigation and to me, to know this fact, to test this scenario. I need your absolutely truthful answer!" He stared at Soichiro, his black eyes very wide and haunting, "I know it must be hard for you, you must feel that you have gone through this enough but I have never had a true answer from you, with complete and fearless sincerity." Soichiro stared at L in desperation for a few moments then let his head fall down again and ran his fingers through his thinning hair forcefully.
"I don't know," he said, slightly croakily, "I just don't know. I never wanted to think about it, I just focussed upon finding the truth. The matter would not have been my decision in the end and I never wanted to consider the concequences…" He voice grew hoarser towards the end and he hid his face entirely in his hands.
"That is my problem," L whispered, "you only ever fought to find the truth, that is the extent to which you desperation lead you. Even when you volunteered to have yourself incarcerated along with Light, even when you drove him out in the car and threatened to shoot him, all these terrible and extreme lengths were only to discover the truth, not in reaction to it. Light is not Kira and that does change everything entirely, but there will still be a terrible and great future ahead of your son due to his talent and ambition and this may well place you in a devastating position in the future. I need to know where you stand on this kind of matter. It is not only still completely vital to this investigation but beyond it.
I'm sorry," L said as he saw Soichiro open his mouth to speak, "I can't explain this to you further, at this point. I need to know this though. I need to know what you would have done if your son was Kira. What you would have done if you had that knowledge and the choices that came with it."
L stared at the man with his glassy black eyes pitilessly as he groaned and his eyes pleaded out from within his unbearably pressured skull. Eventually he managed to give an answer, strained and hopeless from the back of his throat.
"I would have to bring him to justice, I would have to give him up to the police, help have him arrested. He's my son and I love him, with all the strength and resolve of any parent, but I couldn't have protected him if he were Kira. All I could do is fight to do what I could for him within the system, once the business was resolved." L nodded slowly at the distraught man before him.
"I see," he murmured thoughtfully, "I understand your feelings. In some ways they aren't that far from my own way of thinking. However it seems clear to me, after all, that you don't love Light to the degree that I do…"
Arggh a lot of this sounds really...bad at the moment, because L's basically following out just his thoughts and trains of possibilty at this point and he and Light haven't actually resolved anything or made a plan. But I promise it will all make so much sense later and the way that L and Light work together is killer!!
And I'm sorry that L declined Light's offer to shower with him, he really was just busy thinking. In any case they'll be plenty of time for that later for them, at that moment there was other things at hand. And in any case L knows that really Light likes space in the mornings when he's going through his routine.
Basically right now L is thinking about possible consequences of any kind of alliance between himself and Light. He knows that if necesary a great number of people might have to be killed, perhaps even the investigation team and he wants to consider how he could deal with the worst.
But of course he carelessly talks about his feelings without hesitation. Stay tuned for the reaction. 0.0
And in the meantime please do review!!