A/N so I finally brought Emily's album 'Fight of Flight' which is helpful, so a big thanks to Angel who convinced me to buy it and recommended a song from it to use, which will come into this. The only problem is I don't have the Hannah Montana Forever soundtrack on my iTunes anymore and I can't find the CD so I'm relying on youtube to get those songs which is annoying. Anyway I just saw Hannah Montana Forever: I'll Always Remember You for the second time, how annoying is that ending? Still it's calling for fanfics for what happened next. No that wasn't really related to this fic but never mind. I need to give a big thank you to Paula because she gave me an idea which has helped this story dramatically, I also want to thank everyone who's still reading and reviewing despite my lack of updates, it means the world to me. And to the person who reviewed saying the last chapter was too short, it was just under 1000 which is my average, but this one's longer for you. One more thing, if you haven't heard Emily's Double Talk, go to youtube as soon as you have reviewed this chapter. Anyway, this is a long author's note so I'm going to shut up now and let you read the chapter. R&R, ly'all.

Chapter 6:

Lilly found herself reflecting on how stupid the things that caused the end of hers and Miley's friendship were as she drafted her newest song. A heated argument which stretched on and then went way too far. She knew that most of wasn't caused by her or Miley but all the people around them but it was Miley's choice to act how she was. Or at least how she had been. They had been friends for years, they had gone through so much and remained friends, she had at one time thought nothing could come between. But now she knew she should have known better, nothing lasts forever that's what her Mom had always taught her.

All I get from you is double double talk talk
Every single day day, every word you say say
When you move your mouth (mouth) that's all that comes out (out)
just a lotta lotta double double talk talk

Lilly knew the song was going to turn out extremely repetitive but that was all right. It would be intentional, it would be effective. Her first song, I Don't Think About It, had been repetitive and looking back at it now she knew it wasn't a good repetition. This time it would be though. She needed it to get her point across. She was writing about Miley saying one thing at one times and the opposite at another time. The word double meant twice, saying it twice had a double effect.

She found herself staring at the piece of paper for ages before she wrote any more. This song wasn't coming easily and Lilly couldn't be sure why. She knew exactly what she wanted to say, the words were circling her mind but she couldn't seem to find a way to get them onto the paper. In the end she wrote the verse again changing the words just slightly.

All I get from you is double double talk talk
every single time time, make me lose my mind mind
When you move your lips (lip) all I'm hearing is (is)
just a lotta double double talk double talk

Lilly started chewing her pen lid as she thought about it. No one had ever taught her what was right and wrong about writing lyrics. No one had ever told her what worked and what didn't. She was glad about that because it meant her lyrics came out more real and true to herself. She had an idea in her mind of what worked and what didn't from songs she had listened to and from the amount of time she'd spent around Robby Ray and Miley. She was nervous about this song, more nervous than she had been about any other song she had written. Even more nervous than she had been when she wrote I Hate The Homecoming Queen, she wanted this song to work and she was thinking too hard about it. She knew for it to flow properly she needed to just write what she was feeling and not worry about whether it sounded right or not. Songs were meant to be about emotion first and foremost.

She stopped chewing her pen lid and started writing again. This time it wasn't the next part of the song, she knew she was going to have to fit it together once she had everything she wanted, but it was everything she was feeling put into four lines.

I wish that I could trust you, once again
I wish that I could count you as a friend
Hit me with the truth, come on it's me
I need some honesty, yeah honestly

She knew to anyone who heard this song and didn't know everything that was behind that those lyrics wouldn't have seemed that emotive or powerful but she didn't care. They were to her, when she wrote come on it's me she couldn't stop the tears from forming in her eyes. She almost wished she hadn't reacted the way she had to Miley standing up for her. If she hadn't been quick with a smart comment and quick to have a go at Miley would they be somewhere else by now? Would they be talking? She shook her head, no, she couldn't think like that. She didn't need to feel bad about being annoyed with Miley. And she knew they wouldn't have been talking by now anyway, she wasn't sure they ever would be. And she was no long sure what she wanted regarding her. All she really knew was she wanted this to sort itself out with no more trouble but that wasn't likely. She added:

Hey, hey, get your story straight, straight
maybe hesitate, baby wait,
'cause you know it's gonna blow up in your face face

The last line wasn't so true, the chances of this blowing up in Miley's face was unlikely. And she didn't want it to. This blowing up in Miley's face would only cause more pain and problems for both of them and she didn't want that. Not for either of them.

It was over an hour before Lilly got the song lyrics together in a way she was happy with. And even then she wasn't sure about it. But she left them how they were, she knew that if she didn't she would just keep changing it and never just accept it. It was all right, it got her point across, it said everything she wasn't to say. That was what mattered, it expressed what she wanted to say.

Miley pulled a notebook out from the drawer of her bedside cabinet and started writing, wondering how it had come to writing in a diary rather than talking to someone.

Dear Diary,
How wrong does that sound? I've never kept a diary in my life. If I had something I needed to say before I just said it, I told someone whether it was good or bad. And if I couldn't say it to someone I would write it in a song. But now I can't do either of them. Whenever I try to write a song it ends up going no one. I can't get the emotion right or say what I want to say.

I haven't got much that I want to say, there's just a couple of things. Both of them sound so simple and yet they're so major to my life. They're separate but they're connected because if it wasn't for one I wouldn't need to say the other. Firstly I just want to tell the world that I'm an ordinary girl all that happened was my dream came true. I meant what I said today at school today, Lilly singing was no different to me singing, because music is music. It's emotion, it's expression. That's all I ever wanted, I wanted to be a rock star so I could tell the world exactly what I wanted to say and I'd got that. I never thought I'd make it as an international popstar, that was just beyond words. But it was still all about the music, it was always about the music. The music and getting my message out to the world. And now I'd lost that because I couldn't say what I had to say. The world still cared, the world would still listen, but I've learnt that everyone around me, everyone at school, on the beach, doesn't care about the words of my songs, they just care that they have Hannah Montana living in their town.

The second thing I want to say, well really it feels like I need to say it. I need to say sorry to Lilly but I think it's too late. I don't think she'd listen now if I tried and if she did I don't think she'd accept it. To be honest I couldn't blame her if she didn't. I kidded myself for ages that I made the necessary changes to fit the bad situation but I didn't. I made the easy changed to fit the situation, I became what everyone wanted me to be. I went against everything Hannah Montana stood for because I was too scared to just be Miley. I actually managed to make myself think that I wasn't in the wrong, anyone who disagreed with me was. I was such a bitch to Lilly throughout it, I never did anything directly but I was aware of the comments that were being thrown in her direction and I never did anything about it. I can't believe I was stupid enough to hurt Lilly, and let our friendship become this. I stood up for her in the end, today, but it was too little, too late. I can't bare me and Lilly not talking, and it's worse knowing it's all my fault. I can't bare that I've lost my best friend, but what can I do about it? I have to do something. I can't let Lilly go on thinking I want her to leave me alone. I need to sort this end. I need to do something.

You know, I never thought I'd think this, especially with how great the past few years have been, but I'm started to wonder if the best of both worlds was ever a good idea. Would it have been better if I'd chose one or the other? If I'd chose to just live a normal life me and Lilly would've always been friends and none of this had happened. If I'd chose to be famous me and Lilly would've stopped being friends a long time before her friendship started to mean so much to me and none of this would've happened. I know that becoming Hannah Montana was the right decision, it's lead to so many amazing things, things I wouldn't change for the world. But I wish I could go back and sort this out before it got this messy. I wish I could go back and stop everyone here finding out, or just change the way I acted when they did find out. I wish I had stopped trying to be Hannah when my true friend was happy with just Miley.

But the past can't be undone can it? There's no way to stop pain that's already been caused. No way to undo all the pain I've caused to Lilly. I've got to live with knowing I've made my best friend's life hell. I just hope it's not too late to stop this in its track and pull it back into control. I just hope Lilly doesn't hate me. She did say she didn't hate Miley and I just want to be Miley. I want to go back to being Miley in everyday life and Hannah on the stage. I don't want this anymore. Can I put it write?

Miley.