Chapter Nine

Miley ran straight to Lilly's house, pausing momentarily to catch her breath before knocking on the door. A pang of regret ran through her as she remembered a time when she would've just walked in, but she ignored it as Mrs Truscott opened the door. Lilly's Mom's expression when from shock at seeing Miley there to worry as Miley explained what happened. While part of her wanted to blame Miley for Lilly being distracted, looking at the worried and hurt expression on Miley's face she just couldn't.

She instantly grabbed her car keys and Miley went with her to the hospital. Miley rang her Dad on the way, who said he'd meet them there, but Miley said it would be fine, Lilly's Mom would bring her back. The car journey was awkwardly silent, it was clear Mrs Truscott was worried , maybe worried it would be worse than a broken leg, maybe worried how Lilly would react, or maybe worried about Miley going with her, Miley couldn't tell, but the worry was obvious and Mrs Truscott said nothing throughout the journey. Miley on the other hand just didn't know what to say to the Mom of her ex-best friend. She was even starting to wonder if going to the hospital was a good idea, she couldn't not go, though.

They reached the hospital and Miley went into the waiting room while Mrs Truscott found out what was going on. A minute or two later she came into the waiting room and told Miley that they could see Lilly but she wanted to go in on her own first, which Miley understood and accepted, while at the same time wishing wasn't the case. Sitting in the hospital waiting room on her own just gave her time to think. Whether she should be there or not, whether Lilly would want to see her, what she would do if Lilly didn't want to see her, what she should say if Lilly did want to see her, if Lilly did want to see here what would that mean, and a million and one other questions and worries circled her mind. Part of her wished she had taken her Dad up on his offer of meeting her here, while another part of her chided her for being so childish and told her to grow up and deal with her own problems. She had caused them herself after all.

After what felt like hours for was actually no more than 30 minutes, Mrs Truscott came out and told Miley she could go in. Miley walked out the waiting room after thanking Mrs Truscott but stopped before entering Lilly's room. She took a deep breath, come on! She told herself you go out on stage regularly and sing to the world, but you can't talk to Lilly? She sighed, plastered on a smile and walked in.

"Hi" she said, nerves entering her voice the second she opened her mouth. Lilly's leg was in plaster and raised slightly from the bed. "Broken?"

Lilly nodded "Can't wait to go to school and have long lines of people queuing up to sign it"

Miley flinched, she knew Lilly had every right to be bitter and sarcastic, but it still hurt.

"Sorry" Lilly added automatically and quickly. Her voice was genuine and Miley wondered why Lilly cared that she'd hurt her. Was there a part of Lilly who still wanted to be friends or was she reading too much into it when Lilly was just a decent person? She was unsure and she knew she couldn't ask. She went with what she could say:

"Don't apologise" she walked forward and took a seat on the chair beside the bed, looking at Lilly seriously before continuing. "I'm sorry, Lilly. I've been such a cow since everyone found out"

Lilly didn't reply and Miley was unsure whether it was because she didn't accept it or because she didn't know what to say.

"I just…" Miley gave up, just didn't know what to say to prove she meant it. She went back to the one subject which had seemed to bond them before. "You know These Four Walls? The song I sung before the ambulance arrived? I wrote that about you. Well us. Ok that just sounds creepy, like we were together or something, totally not what I meant. But…" Miley was acutely aware that she was rambling and that she was going nowhere and making no sense so she stopped and began again "It was about how the secret had come out when it had been hidden and how because of that and my reaction to it… Well no because of my reaction not because of it coming out, because I'm not blaming anyone else for this anymore… so because of me everything was ruined. And it's funny… well not funny, I mean like funny ironic not funny ha-ha..." she shook her head clearing yet another ramble "But yeah it's funny because anyone who hears it will think it's a love song, about a break up, but it's not and I think that's a problem. A lot of my fans, a lot of Hannah's fans" Miley understood now what Lilly had meant by I don't hate you, I hate Hannah "don't even care what it means. I hate that, but what I hate more is that I accepted it, I went along with it. I went against everything Hannah stood for because I was scared." Miley looked down, running her hands over her face, then tugging her hair behind her ears in a somewhat nervous movement before continuing "I'm sure you really don't care about any of this. I just… Dang, I had a lot to say considering I didn't even know what to say when I came in. I thought you wouldn't want to see me, but then you did and I was just like-"

"Miley, for the love of god shut up" Lilly finally interrupted.

Miley looked at her again, that had been no annoyance, no anger, nothing at all negative in her voice. She even noticed that Lilly was smiling. When Lilly saw Miley was looking at her she laughed, just slightly. The sound was so light and true that Miley couldn't help but smile.

"I swear you could talk for American" Lilly rolled her eyes. "It's all right" she stopped, her smile faded to a more neutral expression as she continued more seriously "Well it's not all right, it's very much not all right, it's actually very wrong. But I mean, it's all right like you don't have to explain yourself. I understand"

"Do you?" Miley asked.

Lilly nodded "You made bad decisions and you reacted in the worst possible way, but I'm not you, Miley. I may be able to sing now, but you were right, at the homecoming dance, I don't know what it's like for you and music. It's a hobby for me, but I know it's everything for you. And I know you had to adapt. I can't honestly say I wouldn't have done the same thing if I were in your shoes, so really I have no right to judge you for what you did."

"Homecoming dance…" Miley whispered, remembering it. Definitely not a good memory "I didn't mean much of what I said at that dance. I was just angry. I'm sorry"

"So am I. I mean, I spent so long angry at you for ignoring me, and letting people bitch about me, but the fact is I was a complete bitch back." Lilly replied. "God only knows what I was thinking getting up on that stage and singing that"

"To be fair, it was a great song" Miley replied, and both of them laughed. It wasn't really funny, but the situation needed something. Something that would make them laugh rather than cry.

Lilly stopped laughing first and looked at Miley "Where does this leave us now?"