XFurubaX: Hey people! Glad you are liking the story! A little warning/tip: I highly suggest you listen to Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy/ Dance of the Reeds from "The Nutcracker" in case you don't understand some of the choreography. Personally, I think once you memorize the beat of the song, you'll (hopefully) be able to figure out what I want Clare to do. I hope you like this chapter! It was by far, the most fun to write! ~ XoXo XFurubaX

The first rehearsal was held that Sunday. The Nutcracker March was being played on the piano. Mrs. Alvaraz was choreographing the two leads and the back up dancers. Clare stood in a small crowd of other cast members. She was the lead Sugar Plum Fairy, then she was with a male partner for "Dance of the Reeds". She smiled upon remembering her parent's faces when they saw her name in the list. For the past few days her parents haven't fought. She felt like she had Jake to thank, she hated to admit it but he was the one who told her to find out what they had in common.

"Edwards!"

Now it was her time.

She taped her toes that day. Less pain, but more difficult to stay on her toes. But right now, she had to focus.

Focus Edwards Focus!

She had been given basic instructions ahead of rehearsal though, to show her what she can do before final choreographing. She had bought the entire Nutcracker soundtrack and listened to her main songs way too many times. She had watched you tube videos praying to god she would be able to keep her composure as well as those ballerinas.

She saw Mrs. Alvarez look at the pianist. He began with the first few beats of the song. She leisurely stepped in, one toe step after the other, lifting her arm, showing that she knew it was all about her at the moment.

He began the first verse of the song.

She somewhat skipped in, toe by toe, then slightly twirling. She then, balanced herself on her right toes, kicking inwards 3 times with her left. Then she hopped onto her left toes, kicking inward 3 times with her right. Three more inward kicks with her right then she twirled around, having fun with it, enjoying the feeling of being on her toes now. She slowed down a little on the twirl before repeating her kicks on the second verse.

"Smile Edwards! Smile!"

Smile?

She smiled, naturally at least she tried. She toe-skipped to her left, twirling, then the last of her kicks before the first interlude. The more she concentrated on smiling, the harder it was for her to keep on her toes.

How the hell do these people smile while doing this? Focus! She thought, interlude!

She stood on her toes, crossing her ankles. She rapidly stepped to her left, did a gentle side lift with her right leg, vice versa, then twirled, fully on her right toes, lifting her other leg completely and stretching it out backward, lifting her arm, just to add some effect. Surely that would impress her teacher.

Crap! Smile!

She then realized it was the second part of the interlude. She switched legs, now on her left toes with her right leg lifted and stretched, switching arms as well. To match the beat, she bounced a few times on her toes, trying not to break them.

She suddenly remembered, her pose…it was an arabesque.

She went back into a standing position. Did a typical ballet hop here and there, repeated her little leg stretch routine along with the bouncing, one more typical ballet hop, then instead of repeating, she began to 'walk' around the studio on her toes, stopping, doing a little bow to her left. 'Ballet walk' little bow to her right.

And That was only the first verse, only…two more.

Fuck! Ok, you did it once, you can do it again!

During the mini transition into the second verse, she trolled around the room merrily and gracefully, acting as if she were in fact, a care-free sugar plum fairy. She didn't realize it, but she was repeating exactly what she did before. It suddenly became natural as it became easier to smile. She felt like she was waltzing rather than dancing ballet. Graceful, slowly, calmly.

She did her leg stretches, bounces, twirls exactly as she did before.

Is this good?

She knew she couldn't look at Mrs. Alvaraz, she knew she'd be concentrating more on what she thought than 'feeling the part.'

But for a second, Clare realized she was feeling the part. She found herself smiling as the moves naturally came to her head when she recognized the notes. She even began to dance more comfortably, knowing what she was doing.

She was on the second interlude.

She crossed her ankles, high on her toes, she gently did her side lifts, becoming quite confident.

Yes! You go Edwards! she loved her rare feelings of cockiness.

She began to do her bounces with her arabesque as it was the final half of the second interlude. She didn't even realize it herself, but she was smiling and didn't even realize it. Of course "Clare" wasn't there at the moment. It was a Sugar Plum Fairy, dancing merrily, enjoying the wonderful spirit of Christmas, beautiful snow flakes, bright colorful lights and the smell of peppermints. She had no idea why she was thinking all this as she danced but she liked it.

She felt…unbelievably happy.

It was the last verse. She continued her inward kicks and transitioning legs, inward kicks, then she realized this was the tag. As much as she wanted this dance to last forever, it had an end. Instead for the first (and last) half of the interlude, she twirled around the studio, slowly, in her little waltz, then finally after a pause as it did in the song, she straightened herself up, holding herself on up on her toes in a mini arabesque.

She had a smile on her face.

In her head however, "Thank god. Thank god its over!" she felt a few beads of swear in her hair but ignored them. She thought it was nearly impossible to sweat in nearly 30 degree weather.

Mrs. Alvaraz walked up to her, Clare couldn't make out her expression but she leaned in, in a soft voice, "See me after class." Clare's stomach flipped a bit. What did she do wrong? Fuck!

"Alright, next cast, Chinese Dance!"

Clare went and sat with the rest of the cast who wouldn't be in this scene, nervously looking at her teacher, god forbidding saying what she thought she was going to say.

X-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-X

Eli was walking to the Dot. He originally intended to walk around his neighborhood to get out of the miserable atmosphere that was his home, but walked just 3 miles longer. When he walked inside the first person he saw was…Jake. He stood at the door. He was sitting at a table with Alli, both with coffee's in their hands.

"You know I don't know why we need final exams every semester to see what we learned I mean, isn't that what end of the year finals are for?"

Alli was talking about school as usual. Eli didn't pay any mind and got in line.

"Hey, when does Clare's ballet class end?"

Ballet?

He turned his head, suspicious as to how the hell he knew Clare took ballet? And when the hell did Clare start ballet? He leisurely scooted out of line and sat down at a table right next to theirs.

"Why do you always talk about Clare?"

"Fuck! Are you kidding me?" Eli scooted his chair a little closer.

Jake scratched the back of his head, "Well…I guess,"

"I guess you should haul your ass away from my girlfriend…"

"I guess I know how divorce feels and…I want to be there for her." he sipped his cup so he wouldn't have to say anything anymore. Alli raised an eyebrow.

"Divorce?" Everything made sense now, the ignoring, the crying, making a big deal over missing a two month anniversary. God, why didn't he figure it out?

"Well…" Alli took a sip, "I guess it's good that she had one friend who can relate to her in a way."

Jake was about to say something, then Alli realized what she had said and pointed a finger, "BUT she has a friend who can relate to her in every other way!"

Jake laughed.

Eli started to think, why the hell is Clare taking ballet? It was a little out of the blue for him. To get away from the family fights? His excuse to get out was going for a 'walk'. Then he wanted to know what ballet studio. He would ask but hell, he barely knew Alli, and Jake…all he knew was his name is Jake.

Hey I'm Eli, Clare's boyfriend who hasn't talked to her for what reason god doesn't know.

Yeah, go with that…

The one ballet studio he saw signs for everywhere was The Star Kirov. It had to be that one. It was the only one in their city. Then he knew how to get him and Clare talking again!

He'd support her. Every moment, no matter what he had to do, he'd be there with her. Showing her he does care. If only he knew where the mother fucker studio was, and if his car was working, his plan would carry out much more easily.

Then he realized computers existed for a reason. He walked out of the Dot, forgetting about Jake and Alli completely.

They were still there, laughing and talking.

Ballet rehearsal was over, Clare grabbed her bag and meekly tried to get off of her knees as she watched the others leave. She had never seen such beautiful dancing in her life, some slow and graceful, some fast and fun, god how she wished she could do all that with her eyes closed like some of them could.

"Clare, can you come here sweetheart?"

She walked over to the piano where Mrs. Alvaraz was. Mrs. Alvaraz has been a ballet teacher for years. She was a ballerina herself for quite a while, with a notoriously strict teacher. She had straight, auburn hair with a fringe, emerald eyes, she was shorter than most of her students, only about 5'1" but had a powerful voice with a deep Italian accent. She had her arms crossed, with a stern face.

Clare felt a stutter coming on, "Yes…Ma'am?" Manners. They always gave a good impression.

She sighed, "Alright." she straightened her posture, "First of all…your dancing was beautiful."

Clare looked at her confused, "Really?"

"Yes, it was very natural, not so controlled, but so…" she took a dramatic pause, "passionate."

Clare smiled, "Thank you."

"But…there is a bad part."

Clare looked…well, down at her.

"How hard was it to stand on your toes?"

Clare got confused again, wouldn't this be one of those questions she asks to the entire class?

"Well, it was difficult, but, it's hard for anyone unless if they were doing this style of dance since they were two. Right?"

She pursed her lips nodding, scanning Clare up and down. "Yes, but," the pauses were starting to annoy Clare, "How hard was it to keep on your toes?"

"Well…" she clutched the strap of her bag, "My legs were a little shaky most of the dance, but I think part of it was because I was nervous…but even now their pretty sore."

She took a step closer to Clare, "How much do you weigh?"

Clare's cheeks grew red as she let out a small laugh. "What?" she smiled unsurely.

"You heard me."

"Heh…115.…" she clutched the strap even more, taking a step back. With an embarrassed and confused smile.

She looked Clare in the eyes, stepping closely to her, "Lose wieght."

She stepped back, it took Clare a second, but then it hit her…hard. "What?"

"Yes Ma'am." she said, imitating her a little.

She stuttered, trying to find the right words. So many things she wanted to say to her…but all she could say was, "Why?"

"Ignaro! Think about it!" yup, she was definitely getting annoyed with her. "The thinner you are, the easier you can hold yourself up."

She was making sense and Clare knew it, but she was still determined to talk, but before she could, Alvaraz had beat her to it, "The easier people can lift you!" she said, raising both her arms on 'lift'.

She was getting bitter, she tried to stay polite, she found herself gritting her teeth, "Mrs. Alvaraz-"

"Ascoltare signorina! You must weigh 90 pounds!"

Damn her….she thought bitterly to herself, talking to her as if she was her pet…her daughter. Damn her… she then hated herself for not taking Italian.

"90 pounds?"

"Have you seen, those other girls?"

Yes, Ma'am…and they're disgusting, and bony.

"Look at how easily they can hold themselves up with nothing left to lose."

"Ma-"

"Ah!" she held a hand up. Clare angrily bit back her tongue…it hurt.

"If you don't weigh 90 pounds by night of show, your out of production. I can replace you," she snapped, "Just like that."

Clare wanted to cry, she felt angry tears in her eyes, but she fought them and choked them to stay away.

"Yes Ma'am." she was hoping she wouldn't see how blood shot her eyes were becoming.

She looked at Clare for a short second before saying thank you. Clare calmly walked out into the hallway, before running down it then bursting through the lobby doors. She couldn't help it, she breathed in, tears falling. Wiping her eyes and snot with the sleeve of her jacket. She sat on the bench, wearing herself down with the gasps, sobs and tears that were seemingly endless.

She felt insulted, taunted and disrespected. This couldn't possibly be the way show bussiness works.

She put on her mittens, hands suddenly numb. She wrapped her arms around her chest, cold. She felt, what felt like extremely cold water fall into her hair. She looked up. It didn't look like rain. She held out her hand, now warmed by the mitten, still a little sulky.

It was about time, it snowed. Very lightly, she stood up from the bench watching the flakes fall and kept telling herself to get home before it really starts. But she couldn't. It was absolutely perfect. The gray sky, light traffic, the cold wind nipping at her nose and cheeks. She loved it, it was peaceful.

She always new that once the snow melted, it would be spring. Spring was her favorite. She loved watching the snow fall because she knew once the bitter, coldness was over, a beautiful, bright new offering would appear.