Ohayo Gozimasu Motherhopers! CJzilla here blasting out another chapter! Now, I seriously think Kappa Mikey was made personally for me. My first episode was "Mikey Likes It" and it was like the sky opened up and there was a booming voice from the heaven saying: "CJzilla, this is for you!" (CJzilla wipes tear from eye) Yes! It was awesome!
Now in this next chapter you will see what happens to the set when Ozu's not himself, Guano freaking out and Mikey getting captured! Enjoy!
As I fight other FanFiction Land monsters, alls CJzilla has to roar is this: R&R! Love me, hate me, flame or fluff... I don't mind at all!
The next morning all the actors came down to LilyMu Studios for Friday's shooting. Spirits were bright considering it was the last day to the weekend and generally, payday!
Mitsuki hadn't left Mikey's side for almost two days… not that Mikey wasn't enjoying all the attention he was getting from the blue-haired actress…
The two came walking through the studio's doors. The American was all smiles and happily skipping about while Mitsuki was shuffling tiredly behind him.
Mitsuki had to sleep in close proximity to Mikey so her night was hard. So as not to cause any concern for the American, Mitsuki had allowed him to sleep in his own house, but not without her! So she mailed herself to Mikey's place in the disguise of a giant fruit basket. The blissfully unaware Mikey had taken his fruit and stowaway inside his apartment thinking the gift was from an adoring fan. He'd eaten half an apple before he ignored the fruit basket and began to eat some candy.
For about four hours until the American went to bed, Mitsuki was crammed in that fruit basket, practically EATING her knees. But once Mikey fell asleep, Mitsuki crept out of her disguise and watched tirelessly over her crush/co-worker/fellow actor/friend. And throughout the night the onslaught of attacking agents did not stop. By the time morning came, Mitsuki was ready for bed. But nay nay. They still had the last part of an episode to film.
Blinking the sleep out of her eyes, Mitsuki saw Guano pacing the set looking angry.
"Good morning Guano!" Mitsuki chirped, keeping a tired eye on Mikey as he excitedly watched a tiny, tiny yellow caterpillar crawl through the studio.
The director/writer/actor/plushy and purple dude spun on his heel and glared at her.
"There's nothing "good" about right now!" Guano blurted out, his arms flailing. "THINGS ARE FAR FROM "GOOD"!"
The purple director fumed as Mitsuki ducked out of the way of his anger flames.
"What's wrong?" she peeped.
Guano raked his teeth together before he pointed to the equipment. There was Yoshi and other anonymous cameramen, editors, set-changers, and audio dudes were just lounging around the studio like they didn't have a job to do. Even the studio's water boy was taking a bubble bath in the middle of the set.
"Will you just look at that!" Guano snarled angrily. "Ever since Ozu lost his nerve, everyone's been lazy! Look! Even the caterers are slacking!"
Cut to the snack table… Raccoons were nibbling off of the nasty, cheap takeout that looked centuries old and several were treating the punch bowl like a hot tub!
"Where's the pride in your work!" Guano was chewing everyone out as he stepped off the set's stage. "Where's the high-quality work ethic!"
The plushy writer was glaring Yoshi right in the eye while the cameraman was playing cards with himself. The cameraman flicked Guano on the nose without thinking much of it.
"Chillax purple doofus," Yoshi remarked unexcitedly as he moved his cards around. "I'll get to filming when I want to."
Guano's mouth fell open as he held his smarting plushy nose.
"FORGET IT!" Guano blasted. "WE ARE RUNNING OUT OF TIME! WE NEED TO FINISH THIS EPISODE BY TONIGHT!"
Yoshi and the other LilyMu staff thought about the risks for a second, then shrugged.
"Yeah, yeah Guano," Yoshi frowned, then he took a card from his deck and flicked it at the director. "I'll get to it in about three hours… I got a lotta personal hygiene to take care of."
With that the cameraman tore off his shirt and began licking off the food residue from breakfast. Guano cringed in disgust.
"YOU WILL ALL GET BACK TO WORK! RIGHT NOW!" Guano blasted, arms flailing.
The LilyMu crew laughed and scoffed at the purple dude. Something inside Guano snapped and as his anime appearance shifted into a towering inferno of anger flames, there was an echo of a familiar LilyMu producer.
"THEN YOU'RE ALL FIRED!" Guano screamed out, his once meek and small demeanor did a complete 360˚ into a very tall, loud, scary plush man.
As LilyMu Studios fell dead silent and everyone on the set starred at Guano in wild wonder, Guano was panting from his angry outburst but he still looked crazy angry. For a second everyone took him seriously… for a second…
Then everyone then laughed at Guano. The LilyMu crew then grabbed the director/writer/actor and tossed him onto the catering table. Guano was promptly covering in half-rotten food and then attacked by the raccoons.
"Oh dear," Mitsuki voice over Guano's screams.
She passed a glance at Mikey who was now doing the "worm" with the caterpillar.
Then Lily walked into the studio, lugging "Ted" with her and accidentally stepped on Mikey's caterpillar friend… Mikey was horrified. Mitsuki watched as her roommate plopped her educational anger management exercise dummy on a chair and wiped beads of sweat from her forehead.
"Hi Lily!" Mitsuki chimed. "How are you and… your… friend?"
Lily glared at Mitsuki.
"That gross landfill reject is not my friend," the blond LilyMu sweetheart hissed pointing at Ted. "The only reason that nasty smell-maker was put on this earth was to annoy me and get me mauled by a crowd of dummy-haters! Just look at my hair!"
Cut to just minuets ago… Lily was being chased again through Tokyo's streets. The crowd of dummy-haters with an aversion for educational dummies had swelled to Vikings, dogs, parade floats and one really, really angry tourist!
Back to the studio…
"That thing is nothing but trouble!" Lily pointed at the dummy. "I've gotten attacked, spurned and kicked out of a restaurant that serves stinky tofu! Stinky tofu! There's nothing that smells worse than stinky tofu!"
"Your temper is rising," Ted beeped. "Count to ten and visit your happy place. Remember, people will like you more if you are calm and collected."
Lily smacked her forehead.
"This is so frustrating," Lily told her blue-haired friend. "I gotta keep most of my anger up here in my head so the dummy doesn't talk to me…"
The blond pointed over at the lifeless dummy as one of the dummy's eyes popped out of his head.
"And I'm not very good at keeping my anger inside," Lily growled, anime sizzle lines appearing above her head. "I know that's hard to believe."
"Of course it's not!" Mitsuki beamed, throwing her arms around Lily. "I've always known you've had violent anger tendencies! But that's why I love you!"
Lily glared at Mitsuki.
"You're not helping Sooks," she hissed through her teeth.
Just then they heard a big yawn. Looking to their left, a pile of fizzy juice cans moved. Then Gonard popped out from under the mound of empty cans, yawning like a hippopotamus. The actor was all sticky and fruit flavored as he walked up to the actresses.
"'Mornin'!" Gonard cheered then shook all of the juice from his hair.
"Ew, Gonard," Lily complained as she ducked behind Mitsuki to shield her from the pop. "What did you do? Sleep in that pile of fizzy juice?"
Gonard looked offended.
"NO!" he blurted out, eyes wide. "I came in this morning and I accidentally tripped into that pile of cans, which used to be full."
Cut to a couple minuets earlier when Gonard came walking into LilyMu Studios, tripped on a power cord and fell into a tower of fizzy juice cans. Then about two minuets later, all the juice was gone.
Back to now…
Gonard shrugged.
"You tripped into the fizzy juice?" Lily cocked an unimpressed eyebrow.
Gonard nodded proudly.
"So I had fizzy juice for breakfast this morning!" the actor chirped then let out an earth-shattering burp.
Mitsuki gasped as she read the label to one of the cans.
"That stuff contains 97 sugar!" the blue-haired actress clapped her hands on her face. "You can't have that for breakfast!"
"Your voice volume is inappropriate," Ted beeped. "Count to ten and visit your happy place. Remember, people will like you more if you are calm and collected."
Mitsuki sweat-dropped and glared at Ted.
"Says you," Gonard stuck his nose in the air. "Ozu doesn't normally let me drink half a tanker load of fizzy juice, but since Ozu's been kidnapped and replaced by the patsy, I can drink two tanker-fulls of fizz juice and no one can stop me! NO ONE!"
And Gonard went diving head-first into a random pile of peanut brittle, and then was joined by the raccoons that were once at the snack table. Mitsuki and Lily watched their friend/blue-haired dude/actor and the raccoons stuff their faces with the candy with a sweat-drop.
"Oh dear," Mitsuki put a hand on her chest. "Here's hoping Ozu gets back to his old self before things get really bad."
Lily scoffed.
"Things never went right if you ask me," the LilyMu sweetheart raised and dropped her caustic eyebrows.
Just then Guano stumbled over to the two actresses, fur all akimbo and his purple plush no longer purple but covering in half-rotten noodles and rotting fish. Wiping some of the crud from off of his plushy face, Guano panted with effort after fighting off the raccoons.
"Things have all ready gone to the bad place Mitsuki!" the director snarled. "Today is the deadline for this episode and the show's imploding! If we don't finish taping today, the scheduled debut of this episode is going to get knocked forward another week! Let's see Ozu keep his pansy attitude when all the television stations call and demand a refund!"
"Your temper is rising," Ted beeped at Guano. "Count to ten and visit your happy place. Remember, people will like you more if you are calm and collected."
With that Guano pounced on Ted and started mauling him.
"Hey!" Lily barked at the director/panicking fuzzy dude. "Beat on someone else's educational dummy you furry spaz!"
And the blond went to save her dummy from the purple spaz mauling it. Mitsuki watched her friends meltdown around her. She sweat-dropped but managed a nervous chuckle.
"Gee," Mitsuki said out loud. "It looks like we're gonna have to shoot late tonight, huh, Mikey?"
The blue-haired actress didn't hear a response.
"Mikey?" she questioned again spinning on her heel to look behind her. "Mikey? Mikey!"
The American was no where to be seen. Mitsuki cursed to herself. She turned her back for one second and Mikey was gone! By now, he could be in the Agency's hands! Mitsuki went scrambling around the studio, trying to find Mikey.
Cue rocking sushi…
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♪♪♪♪♪♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♪♫♪
Bursting out of LilyMu Studios' doors, Mitsuki saw Mikey. He was about to take some candy from an agent who was leaning out the door of a car with a net behind his back.
"Well I don't know," Mikey said thinking for a moment. "That's not sour is it?"
The exasperated agent dropped his head.
"No," the man whined. "For the millionth time, this candy is whatever flavor you want it to be! Just come a little closer and get it."
Mikey still wasn't convinced it was the type of candy he wanted.
"It's not cinnamon flavored is it?" the American asked.
The agent groaned loudly and jumped out of the car, butterfly net in hand.
"Stealth schm-ealth! You're comin' with me now!" he exclaimed angrily, lifting his net above his head to capture the American.
Even in the face of danger, Mikey cocked a brow.
"What kind of Candy Man has a net?" he asked, oblivious.
But before the overly frustrated agent could bring the net down over Mikey and haul him off to Agency HQ, Mitsuki pounced. Giving the man's shin a good kick with the front of her LilyMu costume boot, the agent cried out in pain and dropped the net. Mitsuki then grabbed the net and busted it over his head. With the man semi-conscious and wearing a butterfly net-like skirt, the spy turned actress gave the man a shove back into his car. The car then took off down the street with a squeal of its tires.
Mikey crossed his arms.
"What kind of weirdo Candy Man works out of a car with a net?" the American thought out loud. "Very weird."
Mitsuki whirled around to her friend/crush/fellow actor.
"Mikey!" she snapped. "What were you doing! You're never supposed to take candy from strangers!"
Mikey blinked at her.
"Oh yeah," he replied, thinking out loud again. "Something having to do with Santa knowing your every move…"
Mitsuki slapped her forehead before she grabbed Mikey's shoulders.
"No!" she shook her friend. "He was gonna kidnap you! That guy was-… was- was a vampire… Yeah! And he wanted you to take the candy and join his army of the undead! You're lucky I stepped in or you'd be an undead bloodsucker by now!"
Okay that was a lie, but Mikey bought it. The American's eyes were wide like saucers.
"Plus," Mitsuki whispered out of the side of her mouth. "That candy… was sugar free!"
Mikey's horrified scream could be heard throughout Tokyo. Jumping out of Mitsuki's arms, the terrified American ran like a crazy turkey, back into LilyMu Studios. Mitsuki puffed out an anime sigh of relief. Mikey was almost captured. Mitsuki was going to have to work harder on keeping an eye on him. She walked in after Mikey, shaking her head.
Cue a dancing sushi trio….
♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♪♪♪♪♪♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♫♪♫♪
"LilyMu!"
The LilyMu Action Team's hover jet soared through the air, the roar of its engines echoing through the city of Tokyo. Weaving through the web of tall buildings the jet slowed as four costumed crime-fighters jumped out of the aircraft. Falling to the paved jungle below the superhero team raced down an empty street.
"There's Gonard! Our scanners were right!" the blue-haired tough girl Mitsuki pointed. "He is trying to plunge Tokyo into another dimension!"
In the distance, there was a tall foreboding figure of a ray gun draining reality from the sky in the form of a black hole. And a laugh from the ray gun's owner, the evil villain Gonard.
"Run, run, run as fast as you can Lily-Flops!" Gonard jeered. "Can you stop me and my evil plan?"
More maniacal laughter from the LilyMu Team's archenemy.
"Faster team!" the LilyMu leader extraordinaire, the American "Kappa" Mikey Simon called out to his team. "We can't let Gonard destroy our dimension!"
"Guano Guano!" Guano the team's plushy one-line wonder replied.
The rift in reality was growing bigger and bigger.
"We'll never make it!" LilyMu sweetheart Lily cried out.
"We have to! Reality depends on it!" Kappa Mikey returned and poured on more steam.
The whole LilyMu team went into a full-on sprint, racing to save our dimension. Seconds later they were at Gonard's dimension sucking machine.
"Stop where you are Gonard!" Kappa Mikey commanded. "This is not your dimension to trash!"
"At least not yet Kappa "Moron"!" evil Gonard laughed. "With my doom machine, I will create a dimension that is all my own!"
And he let out an evil laugh.
"Mikey!" Lily cried, her eyes wide with terror. "Our dimension is collapsing! We need to stop him!"
"Guano Guano!" Guano agreed.
"Don't worry team!" Kappa Mikey proclaimed courageously. "Gonard will not succeed!"
Kappa Mikey broke out his orb, cranked his arm back and threw the orb with all his might. The orb flew straight and true, hitting Gonard in the chest, making the villain fall off of his doom machine. Letting out a defeated cry, Gonard fell and fell with a splat on an under-inflated safety pillow.
"CUUUUUUUUUTTT!" Guano screamed.
The cameras stopped rolling and the soundstage stopped recording.
Gonard was face down on what looked like a deflated bouncy balloon. Mikey, Mitsuki and Guano came racing to Gonard's side.
"Oh Gonard!" Mitsuki sympathized. "Are you okay?"
"He fell from a fourteen-foot prop onto a concrete floor… with his FACE, Mitsuki," Guano sweat-dropped. "How would you feel?"
Mitsuki sweat-dropped and gave an embarrassed chuckle.
"Oh, okay," she replied sheepishly.
Mikey, meanwhile, flipped Gonard to his back and was waving his gloved hand over his best friend's face.
"Gonard! Gonard! Gooooonaaaaard?" the American coaxed but no response from Gonard, who had anime "X"s for eyes. "Gonard look! A parade float made entirely outta sandwiches!"
With that Gonard was up and salivating like nothing happened.
"WHERE! I thought I smelled a wounded sandwich!" and the actor was scrambling around trying to find a sandwich that didn't even exist.
Guano smiled at Mikey.
"Good work Mikey," the purple director/writer/actor/plush man beamed. "Now what happened to the safety balloon?"
They all saw the raccoons nibbling on a corner of the safety balloon. A huge hole in any air-filled object will cause immediate deflation. Guano slapped his plushy head.
"Who let those raccoons in anyway!" he called over his shoulder. "They've just ate through our only safety balloon!"
The raccoons hissed at the purple dude and Guano hissed right back.
"I bet that was a disappointment for the raccoons," Mikey voiced. "You know, not finding cream filling inside that balloon."
With that Mikey started nibbling on the deflated balloon.
"Yuck! Tastes like a tire!" the American gagged spitting out a mouthful of balloon.
Mitsuki and Guano sweat-dropped at Mikey. Then Guano pulled on his plushy ears.
"Great!" he was about to have an anger attack. "WHAT ELSE CAN GO WRONG!"
Just then Ozu walked in... And was wearing something scary… A robin egg's blue suit. The LilyMu producer came walking up to everyone, smiling like a sunny idiot.
"Good day everyone!" Ozu cheered. "How is my favorite LilyMu cast?"
Mitsuki jumped behind Guano as she cringed at Ozu's appearance.
"Is that Robin's egg blue?" Guano asked blinking at his boss/dad's suit.
Ozu gave Guano a proud nod.
"This color causes calmness in people," he beamed. "I want people to feel comfortable and calm around me! Because I am so loveable!"
Ozu then hugged himself, making a cute squeak sound. Yes Man then jumped out from behind Ozu and bounced behind Mitsuki, behind Guano.
"Yes Man is frightened!" he whispered, eyes huge.
Guano slapped his forehead.
"I respect the personal improvement Ozu, I really do," the purple writer/director/actor stated. "But you're changing in all the wrong areas. The lack of your leadership is crippling the show! Since you've become a SPINELESS SOFTY, NO ONE'S LISTENING OR WORKING!"
Guano pointed at the lazy-pants crew, catering people and the now lounging raccoons.
"SO YOU BETTER GET YOUR ACT STRAIGHTENED OUT OR LILYMU'S GOING DOWN THE DRAIN!" Guano fumed, anger flames engulfing the studio.
Ozu's face went straight and just when you expected him to blow up back at Guano, he smiled and picked Guano off of the floor.
"You're so tense Guano and a hug will cure that," Ozu hugged his son/actor/employee.
Guano's anime eyes went beady.
"There's no hope for the show now," Guano looked back at his friends. "Ozu's gone irreversible. We're doomed."
Everyone sweat-dropped.
"That's the beauty of anger management!" Ozu cheered. "If only we all improve with our anger!"
Guano squirmed out of Ozu's arm. Starring his boss right in the eye, Guano shoved his finger up his nose.
"Look Ozu!" the purple plush man danced. "I'm picking my nose. That's something you hate! Doesn't it make you angry?"
Ozu blinked at the director. The others got wise to what Guano was doing. He was trying to get Ozu mad and back to his old self.
"Look Ozu!" Gonard cheered, then ripped of Ozu's pants. "I'm eating your pants!"
Still nothing out of the LilyMu producer.
"Hey Ozu! Look!" Lily jumped on Mitsuki's shoulders and they paraded around in a circle. "Synchronized horse play! That's something you don't like!"
Nothing but a cricket chirp out of Ozu.
"Ozu look!" Mikey cheered. "A bunch or anonymous dudes in suits on your stage!"
Every craned around to catch the American get carried off by half a dozen men in black suits.
"Mikey!" Mitsuki cried and raced after him.
But then she was swamped by more agents. No matter how many judo chops, kicks and head-butts she threw at the men, Mitsuki was swarmed and could only watch as she was pinned to the floor as Mikey was carried away. The kidnappers ran out of the studio's doors and then the squeal of tires were heard.
"NO!" Mitsuki wailed, finding some superhuman strength to thrash all of the agents around her.
Flying out the doors and to the street, Mitsuki caught the last bit of the agents' getaway vehicle, Mikey's terrified face in the rear window. The vehicle zoomed out of sight.
Mitsuki fell to her knees.
"Mitsuki!" Guano came running out after her. "What just happened! Who were those people who took Mikey!"
Gonard, Lily, dummy Ted, Ozu and Yes Man were on Guano's tail, literally.
"What happened!" they all asked in unison.
Mitsuki's eyes were cast on the ground in front of her, hair cascading, covering her face. The silence was intense and angry. Then Mitsuki stood. Her friends cringed at the totally seething look on her face.
"I have a job to do," Mitsuki stated in a serious, serious tone. "Don't try to stop me."
OoooooooOOooooooh! Even when Mitsuki uses her serious voice, I still don't take her serious... Now I gotta question... WHO STOLE MY COOKIE!
R&R! LONG LIVE ROCK!