Ohayo Motherhopers! Here's another chapter for you Kappa Mikey-love hungry fools! In this chapter you will find out whether or not the LilyMu cast gets anywhere with their rescue...
As I stomp flat this city, alls CJzilla has to roar is this: R&R! Love and/or hate me... Don't care.
Cue boogieing sushi rolls!
Mitsuki was killing time. Gonard, Guano and Lily had to have enough time to get Mikey and themselves out of the building. And the blue-haired actress had to keep Agent F busy and dumb to the fact that his leverage over her was escaping in a pair of really tall pants.
Mitsuki stood on the other side of Agent F's desk just glaring at him. The Agency head-honcho was grinning smugly at her.
"Impressed Agent M?" Agent F jeered. "It took my men many, many, many, many tries but we finally have Mikey Simon in our clutches."
"You just got lucky Agent F!" Mitsuki snarled leaning over the desk and pointing a finger in his face.
Agent F gave one nod.
"We did," he admitted. "You were never easy to turn from a set course Agent M. You were always stubborn… That's why you made an excellent agent and why you could never turn your back on us!"
Mitsuki raked her teeth together before straightening her posture.
"Fine," she relented. "You have me here, you have Mikey. Now let my friend go!"
Agent F studied her for a quick second as he pursed his lips.
"No… I don't think I will…" he smiled evilly.
Mitsuki wasn't expecting anything less from the mailbox man.
"I plan on keeping my control on you Agent M," he added. "If I was to let the cockeyed chucklehead Mikey Simon go, what's to stop you from walking out with him? No, I plan on making him a fixture here at Agency HQ…"
Agent F took pleasure in seeing Mitsuki's face twist with rage.
"Oh don't worry Agent M," the Agency boss-man stated. "You'll be able to see your lover-boy, behind six inches of glass! Like a monkey behind a glass wall like at the zoo! But, you know, without the smell and peanuts and ravenous little kids running amuck."
There was a sound of a bird tweeting before Mitsuki narrowed her eyes at her ex-partner/boss.
"You've sunk to a new low this time F," she hissed with venom.
"Oh! You forced me to do things I didn't wanna do, Agent M!" Agent F returned, waddling around his desk to her. "If you'd just come back to the Agency, NONE of this would have happened!"
"What part of "retired" do you not understand?!" Mitsuki snapped. "I retired because I didn't want anything more to do with the Agency… OR YOU!"
Agent F gasped, his anime mouth falling open in shock. Then he scowled angrily.
"Don't make this harder for yourself M," he snarled. "You can either be my friend and things will go back to the way the used to be… or… you can annoy me and I'll take your brain and put it in a robot!"
"You wouldn't!" Mitsuki gasped.
"Yes!" Agent F leaned forward. "Yes, I will! I put the janitor's brain inside a telephone because he didn't listen when I TOLD HIM HE WAS PUTTING TOO MUCH WAX ON THE FLOOR!!"
Cut to some point in time in the Agency when the floor was very waxy… Agent F had fallen and was sliding around the Agency's hallways like a buttered-up air-hockey puck on an ice-rink made outta frozen jell-o. It didn't help that the other agents were continuing their lives without helping him out…
Back to Agent F's office…
"I floated around that hallway for days before I came to a stop on some carpet," Agent F reminisced as the sound of a kuku clock cut through the air then he grabbed a phone right next to him. "YOU HEAR ME CHESTER! YOU ARE A BRAIN INSIDE A PHONE BECAUSE YOU REFUSED TO-!"
"I'm sorry, your call cannot be completed at dialed," the phone beeped. "Please hang up the phone and dial again."
Agent F sweat-dropped and put the phone back on the receiver.
"Wrong phone," he explained. "The Chester phone's around here some where."
Mitsuki sweat-dropped as the sound of a gong cut through the air.
"You have me here," Mitsuki voiced. "Now, what was the impossible mission only I could complete?"
"Oh!" Agent F realized. "Yes! The mission is called…: "Operation Kosher"."
"I'm listening," Mitsuki stated, cocking an eyebrow.
Agent F nodded.
"I have the paper work right here," he stated, waddling back to the other side of his desk.
He bent down to his desk drawers, and how he did that in a mailbox costume, we'll never know. But then he placed a jar of kosher dill pickles on his desk. An anime question mark appeared above Mitsuki's head.
"What is this?" she gestured to the jar of pickles.
"Pickles!" Agent F beamed in a happy anime face.
"But-… what about "Operation Kosher"?" Mitsuki asked, very confused.
"This is it!" the Agency head-honcho cheered.
Mitsuki's mouth dropped to the floor.
"The Agency can't get this jar of kosher dills open," Agent F explained with a sweat-drop. "It's embarrassing yet very crippling at the same time. But I can't have a decent sandwich without a pickle."
Rage flames engulfed Mitsuki as she seized the pickle jar, popped the lid off and dumped it all over Agent F.
"There!" she snarled.
Agent F spit out a mouthful of pickles and gave Mitsuki a sheepish look.
"I said only you could do it M!" he said carefully. "You are very well qualified for opening pickle jars and… no one else could do it! Everyone who tried either broke their hand or will never be able to look at pickles again!"
Agent F and Mitsuki looked to the right to see several agents in full-body casts or in a fetal position with a "no pickles 4 ever" T-shirt on. Agent F puffed out an anime sigh.
"See?!" he looked at Mitsuki. "But now "Operation Kosher" is complete! YAY! You hear that guys?"
"Hazza!" the agents in the corner of Agent F's office cheered as the sound of a victory horn cut through the air.
Mitsuki had an anime question mark above her head before she burst into anime anger flames.
"You… stink… Agent F!" she hissed in all rage.
Agent F stuck out his bottom lip in a sad pout.
"Don't be like that M," his anime eyes filled with gooey anime tears. "Hurtful words hurt."
Mitsuki snarled, pulling on her hair.
"My fists are going to hurt more than words Agent F!" she hissed grabbing Agent F by the costume and yanking him to her face. "YOU YANK ME OUTTA MY LIFE, PUT MY CRUSH IN DANGER AND THEN SHANGHAIED HIM JUST FOR A STUPID JAR OF PICKLES??... I'm gonna give you the worst power wedgie you've ever-!"
Just then the two agent guards from the piranha tank room burst into Agent F's office.
"Agent F, sir!" one of the men blurted out. "Something's fishy! And it's not just YOUR breath!"
Cue awkward cricket chirp through room as Agent F smelt his own breath.
"What's wrong now?!" the Agency boss-man snarled. "You are cutting in my time with Agent M!"
Another awkward cricket chirp.
"First, there were three agents that said that you personally asked them to guard Mikey Simon," one of the agents began. "Then they said there were donuts in the break room… but HQ doesn't have any break room!"
Agent F and Mitsuki sweat-dropped.
"Is that it?" Agent F's eyes were beady.
"NO!" the agent went on. "It gets weirder! Then when we came back, they left and now Mikey Simon hasn't blinked for the last ten minuets… That and the hall monitor found the three of them wandering around trying to find the snack machine."
Then one of the men leaned out the door and hauled Lily, Gonard and Guano into Agent F's office.
"Everyone that works here knows we don't have a snack machine! These guys aren't one of us!" the agent pointed at the three "agents".
"We've updated security since you've been gone Agent M," Agent F beamed at Mitsuki. "We have a hall monitor who patrols the halls on roller blades."
Through the opened door a hall monitor could be seen glided over the waxy floor on a pair of roller blades before a golf kart full of agents ran him over. Everyone cringed as the hall monitor screamed as he was ground into the floor by the golf kart.
"Serves him right for tattling on us," "agent" Gonard folded his arms. "I just wanted a candied pretzel and he goes and writes us up for loitering!"
Now that everyone's attention was put back on her disguised friends, Mitsuki was starting to panic as Agent F studied them carefully.
"What are your names?" the Agency head-honcho asked.
Lily, Guano and Gonard subtly glanced at each other but their nervous sweat-drops were just flowing from their faces.
"Agent L."
"Agent 007."
"I am Agent Frank."
Lily and Guano glared at Gonard. Gonard gave a sheepish shrug.
"Of course," Agent F nodded, a sly glint in his eyes. "Agents L, 007 and Frank…. Riiiiight…. Let me make you more uncomfortable."
There was an awkward cricket chirp as the Agency boss-man's words sunk in.
"Don't you mean "more comfortable"?" Gonard asked.
"………. No!" Agent F pondered before he pressed a button on his desk.
And then several paralyzer beam weapons popped outta the ceiling, chairs and potted plant on Agent F's desk.
"Hands up imposters!" Agent F barked.
Gonard, Lily, Guano and the other two agents raised their hands.
"Not you two," Agent F's eyebrow twitched in annoyance. "Just… stand over there!"
And the two men moped over to the corner.
"Who are you three?!" Agent F barked, looking back over to Gonard, Lily and Guano. "And why are you here?!"
The three actors remained quiet but nervously eyed the many laser beam guns pointed at them.
"Nothin'," Gonard returned twiddling his thumbs together.
Agent F scowled.
"I suggest you be honest with me," the head-honcho said through his teeth. "Because my finger's getting tired."
Through the opening of his mailbox costume Agent F held a big red button in his hand and held his finger over it. Lily, Gonard and Guano gulped hard. Agent F snorted and turned to Mitsuki.
"You look nervous Agent M," he noted. "Are these your friends? And is this some sort of haphazard rescue attempt?"
Mitsuki looked back at her ex-boss/partner with wide eyes.
"So it is then," Agent F surmised. "Then where's Mikey Simon?"
"He's still in the piranha tank room!" one of the agents in the corner stated.
Agent F pursed his lips and glanced between Mitsuki and her friends.
"With the disguises and infiltration, you clearly thought this out and so you wouldn't come all this way just to leave Mikey Simon hanging… that doesn't make any sense," he voiced. "Like as much sense as "Jumbo Shrimp" makes or the word "groovy"."
"HEY!" Gonard barked and folded his arms. "I get jump shrimp! It's YOU I don't get!"
Everyone looked at Gonard like he's said something that didn't make sense.
"Is there anyone else inside your monkey brain besides you, "Agent Frank"?" Agent F questioned, eyebrow twitching.
"Only the pirate voice in the ceiling," Gonard returned, still pouting angrily.
Cue awkward silence.
"Go get Mikey Simon! AND BE QUICK ABOUT IT!!" Agent F blasted.
The two agents that were once in the corner took off like the wind and in half a second they were back, holding Ted the dummy. Agent F's mouth fell open in shock.
"See! He won't blink! Look!" one of the agents touched "Mikey's" eye and nothing happened.
"Ew!" both agents gagged as that one kept poking Ted's lifeless dummy eye.
And then Ted's eye popped out and both agents when pale with horror as the eye rolled around the floor.
"HE'S ROLLING HIS EYES AT ME!!" Gonard shrieked and ran around in a circle as the glass eyeball was in hot pursuit.
"That's not Mikey Simon!" Agent F voiced. "That thing's too quiet."
Then the Agency boss-man turned to Mitsuki and gave her an intense glare.
"Where is he?!" Agent F barked.
"Your temper is rising," Ted beeped. "Count to ten and visit your happy place. Remember, people will like you more if you are calm and collected."
But no one was listening to the dummy. Mitsuki didn't answer and Agent F turned to her.
"Where is Mikey Simon, Agent M?!" he growled then whipped his laser beam control remote into her face. "I'm losing patience M! Tell me where that bumbling dead-weight, Mikey Simon is or I'll turn your friends into Swiss cheese!"
Just then the purple dude's pants sneezed. Agent F whirled around.
"Did your pants just… sneeze?!" he barked at Guano.
Guano sweat-dropped as Lily, Gonard and Mitsuki held in a gasp.
"N-n-no! Of course not! That would be stupid!" Guano answered. "I sneezed! Yeah, I'm allergic to laser beams."
Guano quivered at the many laser beam guns pointed in their direction. Agent F wasn't buying it. He narrowed his eyes at them.
"Hey! One of you! Get your butt over here and check that guy!" the Agency head-honcho barked.
One of the horror stricken agents was on his feet and began to frisk Guano. When the man passed his hands along Guano's "legs", his pants giggled.
"Poke him again!" Agent F ordered.
The agent did as he was told and sure enough, his pants giggled again. An anime lightning strike of realization struck the background behind Agent F.
"PANTS 'IM!!" he exclaimed.
The agent grabbed Guano's pants and gave it a sharp downward pull. With a good yank, Guano's pants were on the floor. His stilts and a nearly naked Mikey Simon were exposed to everyone's eyes. Mitsuki, Gonard, Lily, Mikey and Guano gasped. Agent F's eyes narrowed further.
"Brrrrr!" Mikey shivered as Guano fell off of his stilts. "There's a breeze in here!"
The sound of a spring cut through the air as Agent F slapped his forehead.
"Why are you always losing your clothes?" the Agency boss-man questioned.
"We had to put something on the dummy!" Gonard replied.
"RHETORICAL QUESTION!!" Agent F shouted.
The mailbox agent was now fuming mad as he turned to Mitsuki.
"Well now that I got all of your friends in one room…" he began, sinister look in his grey eyes. "We can feed them all to the piranha! Four birds with one tank of piranha! Brilliant!"
The Agency head-honcho gave an evil laugh. But before anyone else could make a move, reinforcements busted through the door. Ozu and Yes Man kicked down the door and knocked down everyone in front of the door. They were in full-on Marine gear; complete with face paint and really, really big guns.
"DO NOT TRY ANYTHING FUNNY OR I'LL USE THIS THING! YOU KNOW I WILL!!" Ozu screamed holding a Doberman Pincher launcher in his arms.
"TRIGGER HAPPY!!" Yes Man shouted holding a stinky sock bazooka.
Mikey, Guano, Lily and Gonard peeled themselves off of the floor.
"Hi Ozu!" Mikey cheered. "Good to see you're not a softy pansy anymore!"
Ozu gave a nod.
"It's good to be back, Mikey," he voiced, cocking his weapon. "I know I'm creepy when I'm nice."
"DISTURBING!" Yes Man shouted.
Their reunion was cut in half by a cocky chuckle out of Agent F.
"It's so nice to see the whole family back together!" Agent F said sarcastically, sarcastic anime tears running down his face. "Touching, really. But I'm afraid none of you will be leaving anytime soon."
Agent F still held the laser controller in his hand, with his finger hanging just above the big red button.
"My Doberman launcher begs to differ cupcake!" Ozu snarled.
"LET MY PEOPLE GO!" Yes Man shouted, cocking his stinky sock bazooka.
Agent F narrowed his eyes at the old man.
"Just release my friends Agent F," Mitsuki voiced, stepping between Agent F and Ozu. "Let them go and I'll work for you again."
"Mitsuki!" Mikey called out. "NO! Don't!"
The blue-haired actress ignored the American and looked into Agent F's eyes. Agent F studied his ex-partner's eyes and found them to be sincere.
"It'll be just like old times," Mitsuki added. "Just let them go… and I'm all yours."
Glancing between Mitsuki and the others in the room, Agent F came to a decision.
"Fine," he barked. "But they need to leave HQ… NOW!"
Mitsuki gave a nod and turned to her friends.
"You guys go…" she gave a smile. "I'll… catch up."
Everyone's mouths were slack, but Mikey spoke up first.
"NO!" the almost naked American fumed. "You are walking out with us Mitsuki! You gotta!"
Mitsuki gave Mikey a kind smile.
"I'll be right behind you, Mikey," she beamed.
But Mikey stomped his foot.
"NO!" he blasted again. "You're walking out with us or nothing!"
And the clumsy American moved like the wind and grabbed a hold of Agent F's laser control remote.
"HEY!" Agent F exclaimed. "That's my laser gun remote!!"
"Oh, no you don't!" Mikey was trying to wrestle the controller out of Agent F's hands.
In the melee the remote's many buttons were being smashed and so the lasers were shooting off in all directions, making everyone dive for cover. Coffee makers, TVs, telephones, copiers and massage chairs were going off all over the building. Everything was chaos until…
"Agency HQ self-destruct sequence activated," a mechanical voice rang through the air. "One minuet and thirty seconds until self destruct."
Everyone gasped as red lights and sires sounded throughout the building.
"SHE'S GONNA BLOW!!" Guano screamed.
"Quick!" Mitsuki cried. "Everyone out!"
Everyone gasped again.
"Book it!" Ozu cried and dramatically pointed toward the door.
"TAKE TO YOUR HEELS!" Yes Man cried.
"Save Senior Puddin'!" Gonard cried and then tried to pick the dummy off of the floor but found that he was stuck to the floor. "SOMEONE'S STAPLED PUDDIN' TO THE FLOOR!!"
Lily giggled evilly as she threw a stapler over her shoulder.
"Go on without me," Ted beeped. "I have done my job."
"No you haven't!" Gonard objected crying over Ted's stapled dummy body. "Lily's still as nasty as a wolverine that just ate a bucket of jalapenos!"
"Then (cough) I have given everyone a cheap laugh over my ineffective anger management training," Ted then gave a loud electronic death rattle and kicked the bucket.
"NOOOOOOOO!!" Gonard screamed as Guano and Ozu dragged him off of Ted.
"One minuet fifteen seconds until self destruct," the mechanical voice beeped.
"C'mon Gonard!" Lily grabbed the big lug and hauled him to the door.
Ozu, Lily, Gonard, Guano and Yes Man zipped out the door.
"Mitsuki! Let's go!" Mikey called to the blue-haired actress as he paused for his friend.
She nodded and looked toward Agent F who looked like someone just dropped an ice-cube down his costume.
"This agency is not worth your life F!" Mitsuki held out her hand to him. "Let's get out of here."
Agent F snapped out of his shock and gave her a wily grin.
"I will not leave this empty handed Agent M!" he grinned.
Then he pressed another button on his remote and a glass tube dropped from the ceiling and fell over Mikey. The American gave a surprised yelp as he banged on the glass.
"Mikey!" Mitsuki blurted out and ran to him.
Agent F let out a laugh and as soon as Mitsuki turned to her psycho ex-boss/partner there was a flash of brilliant light as his office wall blew. Hovering within feet of the hole in the building was a get-away helicopter. Smoke and debris was kicked up from the whirling blades of the flying machine. Though the helicopter's spotlight was on her and blinding her, Mitsuki saw Agent F's outline as he got into the helicopter. In that same second, a grappling hook shot out from the copter and clasped onto the glass tube Mikey was in.
"Take care Agent M!" Agent F cackled and the helicopter began to pull away from the building, taking the American with it.
"Mitsuki!" Mikey cried as his glass tube was being dragged through the office.
Without thinking Mitsuki jumped on the glass container and was then taken for the ride of her life.
R&R! LONG LIVE ROCK AND ROLL!!