A/N: Yeah I wasn't really paying attention when I wrote this, so if some bit (or the whole thing) isn't very good please tell me.
Disclaimer: Yeah. Not really any copyright infringement, but just in case you didn't know, I DO NOT OWN SCRUBS. Just in case you've been living under a rock or something...
Inner Turmoil
I love him.
I know that I do.
But, I don't want to love him. Why oh why do I love him?
He can't love me. He's straight. He has a (sort of but not really ex-)wife, for Christ's sake. And trust me, you can't not be straight if you're with Jordan. That lady is a woman.
I don't get why I love him. He is sarcastic, mean, showoffy, rude, smart, handsome, clever... Oh. Yeah, that could explain it.
He is really smart. I swear I'd never have made it through being an intern without his mentoring. And even as a resident, I couldn't handle it without him. He is usually right, even when I don't want him to be. And he always knows how to handle the tough things.
If only he had feelings for me. If only- but he couldn't. He doesn't even care about me, I'm just his girly Newbie. The new doctor that follows him around endlessly asking pointless questions. Well, I can't help that the questions are pointless! It's not my fault I can't find a good reason to follow him around!
But I will always follow him around.
That's the closest we'll ever be. Me the baby duckling whose two letter name is so hard to remember he must call me girls names, and him the smart, funny, sarcastic mentor that has a family, and absolutely no interest in me.
None at all.
But a girl can dream, can't I?