CHAPTER 17

Luke circled around his X-wing, inspecting the craft and pulling at the S-foils as had become his superstition before a mission. Over the past year his pilots had taken up his habit of personally inspecting their spacecraft, that he himself had picked up while piloting all types of unreliable ships on Tatooine, so that the entire squadron was shuffling around the hangar before preparing to leave for yet another mission. Off in the distance, Han and Chewbacca were loading supplies for the Rebel base into the Millennium Falcon. The older man met Luke's eyes and they shared a wave, while Chewbacca gave a hearty howl in good-bye.

Luke was just about to climb the ladder into his cockpit when he felt a small hand fall on his shoulder. He turned around, almost expecting to see Mara, but was pleasantly surprised to see Leia instead. "I just wanted to say good-bye before we left," Leia said. "You almost ready to go?"

"I think so," Luke replied, glancing around the hangar to the rest of the pilots, who were either finishing their inspections or getting settled into their X-wings. He wondered why Leia had felt the urge to say good-bye to him; maybe for the same reason he'd felt unnerved about the upcoming mission for the past few days. "You?"

Leia glanced back at the Millennium Falcon, then nodded. "I guess so. This will be an interesting trip at the very least."

"Han still giving you trouble?"

"He's always giving me trouble; why should that have changed?"

Luke shrugged innocently. "No reason."

"Whatever." Leia smacked his arm. "You of all people shouldn't be giving me grief."

"Oh, why's that?"

"Wedge told me what happened."

"He did, did he? You guys really are trying to control my life, aren't you?"

"Not at all. If I was, I would be grabbing you by the shoulders and telling you to stop being an idiot and go for it with Mara."

Luke stared at her in shock. "What? You of all people think I should lie?"

Leia nodded. "I agree with Wedge. I think it'd be for the best."

"Well did he tell you my decision?"

"Considering Mara isn't over here saying good-bye, I'd wager that you refused their plan."

"I did."

"May I ask why?"

He glanced back to Mara, who was doing her best to focus on her X-wing and avoid staring at Luke and Leia. He sighed. "I just can't keep something like that a secret. I like her a lot, Leia. It wouldn't feel right. I'd be living a lie."

"I understand that, but the Rogues are right, Luke. You need to do something about the situation before you get yourself hurt."

"I know. And I will, when we get back. Wedge has a plan."

"Wedge has a plan? Oh dear. Well, whatever you decide, you know I'll support you—right?"

Luke smiled and they hugged. "I know, and thanks." He pulled away and gave her a mischievous smile. "And you know the same is true for you, right?"

Leia straightened up and affected her best "Princess" pose. "I don't know what you are talking about, Commander Skywalker."

"Sure you don't, Your Highnessness."

"Oh, don't you start that now, too!"

He pulled Leia into another hug. "Be well, and don't kill Han on the way to Drunost."

"I can't promise that."

"Leia."

"Fine! I promise I won't kill him, as long as he promises to act like a civilized human being."

"Hey, Your Worshipfulness! We're waiting for your pretty little behind to get onboard!"

Leia's face turned pink and Luke clasped his hand over his mouth to cover up his laughter. "Looks like Chewbacca is gonna have to fly the Falcon by himself," Luke teased.

"Oh, shut up. Go kiss your girlfriend good-bye."

"Leia!"

"Bye, Luke."

"Good-bye, Leia."

He watched his old friend approach the Falcon, exchange several harsh words with Han, then climb up the ramp in a huff. Han turned to give Luke a thumbs up, that trademark grin plastered across his face. Luke laughed and saluted in return.

Finally, Luke turned back to his X-wing…and came face-to-face with Mara.

She swallowed hard, looking like she was wondering why she'd approached him in the first place. "Um, hi. I just wanted to say…um…fly well."

Luke's lips turned into a warm smile. "Same to you, Mara."

The redhead smiled back, looked down awkwardly at her feet, then pointed back to her ship. "I guess I should get going…"

"Wait." Luke's voice stopped her cold, and he stepped forward to place his hand on her shoulder. Wedge had reported to him earlier that morning with full details of his devious plan, and Luke had to hand it to his XO—the plan was definitely inspired. Now all he needed was to speak with Mara about it.

She looked up at him with her beautiful green eyes, and Luke took a deep breath. "Mara, I was hoping…when we get back…I was hoping we could talk."

"Oh?"

Luke bit his lip but still held her gaze. It was now or never. "About us."

Mara looked down at her feet. "Oh."

Great, now you've made her uncomfortable!"We don't have to, I understand completely, it was just a thought, just say the word and I'll never mention it again—"

"No." Her word was emphatic, and she stepped towards him until her body was almost flush with his. "No…I mean…I would like that a lot…Luke."

He broke out into a huge grin. "I'll be looking forward to it." Then, in a surge of recklessness that probably would've gotten him killed in most situations, he leaned in to kiss her on the cheek. She turned her face at the last minute…and their lips touched.

It only lasted a moment, but Luke never wanted it to end.

They broke apart immediately, and her fingers were on her lips and her cheeks were flushed. Luke wanted nothing more than to grab her and pull her into the nearest storage closet and kiss her until the galaxy stopped turning, but he had a job to do—they both did.

Their conversation—and the kiss—would have to wait.

With a bounce in his step, Luke climbed up the ladder to his cockpit and pulled on his helmet. He was the last to get in his X-wing. With renewed confidence, he keyed on his comm. "Rogues, this is Leader. All wings report in."

The Rogues went through their roll call, some teasing and others with a congratulatory tone. Mara, for her part, sounded confident and, dare he say, flirtatious. He smiled as she spoke: "Rogue Ten, ready when you are." Oh, I hope you are.

After Zurel had reported in, Luke again turned on his comm. "Alright Rogues, everyone is in the green. You are clear for launch. May the Force be with us."

Luke's X-wing rose on its repulsorlifts, then slowly exited the hangar behind the Millennium Falcon. The other Rogues followed him, getting into formation just outside of Home One.Luke set the jump timer; once it hit zero, he hit his hyperdrive lever and the stars collapsed on themselves.

Luke leaned back in his ejection seat and smiled, the taste of Mara's lips still strong on his. He closed his eyes, and imagined what it would be like to really kiss her... He hoped that, soon, he would find out.

He had no more misgivings about the upcoming mission. For the first time in a long time, Luke truly felt that things were looking up.

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Leia was hunched over the dejarik table, furiously scribbling notes from the information Intelligence had provided about the upcoming mission to Drunost. She was always slightly anxious before a mission, this time even more so. One of the groups seeking to join the Alliance was led by an Adarian named Yeeru Chivkyrie. Adarians lived by rigid social standards based on one's tier and Leia wanted to be certain that she didn't make any gross mistakes on this mission. It was deeply important to gain more support in the Shelsha sector, and Mon Mothma had once again entrusted Leia to get the job done.

Leia often wondered why so many people placed so much faith in her abilities. Everyone seemed so confident that Leia would never fail on a mission, that she knew what she was doing, and generally that was the case. But she was only twenty years old, and while nobody would ever say so to her to her face, she couldn't help but think that some people thought negatively of her because of her youth. She vowed never to let her age affect how anyone felt about her, and so she worked even harder to accomplish every task set in front of her.

Winter said that Leia was working herself too hard, a comment that elicited hearty laughter from the Princess. Winter herself was a known workaholic, and thanks to her photographic memory Intelligence was always clamoring to send her on reconnaissance missions. Their passion for their work was one of the things that brought the adopted sisters together, and it helped keep them whole after their world was destroyed.

"Princess?"

A male voice brought Leia out of her reverie; she glanced up to find Han standing in the entrance to the hold. When they'd first met, Leia had been infuriated by his insistence on calling her "Princess." Since then, however, Leia had learned that "Princess" was one of his more polite nicknames, so she didn't mind it anymore. It was almost…nice.

"Hello, Han," she said, nodding politely. She wasn't quite sure when she had stopped solely referring to him "Captain Solo," and she wasn't quite sure what she felt about that development.

"Mind if I sit?"

She did—she had work to do, but she knew Han wouldn't leave her alone, so she moved over on the acceleration couch. Han sat down, leaving a polite distance between them. Leia expected him to start antagonizing her at any moment, but he surprised her by bringing up a topic that never went well between them—only this time, his tone was actually congenial. "So how was Luke?"

Leia glanced at him warily. "He was fine. Why?"

"No reason. I just haven't gotten a chance to talk to the kid lately. Wanted to make sure he was doing alright."

"You mean, you wanted to make sure that his crush on Mara isn't making him crazy?"

Han grinned. "Something like that, yeah. I feel bad, not having seen him around much. He could probably use some good advice."

Leia snorted. "Don't worry. I think he got his fair share of Corellian advice from Lieutenant Antilles the other day. Apparently, the Rogues ambushed him."

"Nice! I knew I could count on Antilles to hold up Corellian tradition. So what happened?"

"Nothing." Leia shrugged. "They advised Luke to ignore regulations and go for it with Mara, that they'd help him cover it up if the two of them got caught and even if they did, Command wouldn't care. But he refused. Said he didn't want to lie."

Han groaned. "That kid! I swear I don't get him. So what were you talking to him about, huh? Congratulating him on taking the high road?"

"Actually, I wasn't."

"You weren't?"

"It seems like there really is a first time for everything, Captain," Leia said, grinning. "We actually agree on this matter."

"Really? You think Luke should throw out regulations so he can kriff Mara?"

"Han!" Leia shoved his arm hard, remembering why she was always so wary about him, and why she constantly reminded herself that he was a no-good scoundrel. "Don't be rude!"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he said, holding his hands up in apology. "But come on, Leia. You know how guys his age are."

"And what about men your age, Captain Solo?"

"Oh, you'll just have to find that out for yourself," Han replied, leaning back in the chair with a smug look on his face. Leia shook her head in disgust and looked down to resume reading her datapad, but he snatched it out of her hand.

"Hey!" Leia exclaimed.

"Don't worry, sweetheart, I'll save your place," Han promised. "But you need to relax."

"I'll relax when the mission is over. Please give me back the datapad."

"No."

"No?"

"No."

Leia snarled and reached for the datapad but Han pulled it away at the last minute, leaving her almost lying on top of him. She instantly pushed herself up to the other end of the couch. "I don't have to sit here and take this—"

But Han's hand was on her arm, pulling her back to the couch. "Sit, Leia. Relax. I promise, I'll be nice."

"I don't think that's possible."

"Well, you should stay and find out. You might be surprised."

Leia glared at him as he flashed one of those stupid grins and for some reason, she found herself agreeing to his request. "Fine."

He leaned towards her, looking a little too full of himself for her tastes. "So, you really think Luke should ignore regulations so he can go have a nice cup of caf with Lieutenant Jade?"

Leia almost laughed at Han's overtures to be polite, but at the last minute she remembered that she was frustrated with him and stopped herself. "Actually, that's exactly what I think. Like the Rogues pointed out, Luke hasn't been as focused as he normally is. I think it would do him a world of good to stop thinking and do something about this. Most of all, he really likes her, Han. A lot. All the Rogues make fun of him for it, but there's something more there doing on between them. I think he might even love her."

"Whoa, whoa whoa—that's a mighty big declaration to make after knowing each other a few months!"

Leia narrowed her eyes. "I didn't say that he should tell her that, Han. I don't even know if it's true yet. But if he gives it a chance, I think that he will eventually. I don't know how to explain it. I just think there's something more there than meets the eye."

"Well, isn't that romantic."

"What's wrong with romance, Captain Solo?"

"Nothin', sweetheart. I happen to love romance."

"I'm sure you do," Leia scoffed.

It was quiet for a moment. Leia's hand slowly crept across the dejarik table towards her datapad, but Han pushed it farther away in return. She nearly stuck her tongue out at him in frustration but caught herself at the last minute. She wouldn't let him goad her like all the other times. There was too much at stake in the upcoming mission for her to allow herself to be distracted.

"Can I ask you a question, Princess?"

Leia sighed. She knew that she should say no, but she also knew that Han wouldn't let up until she gave in. "Sure, why not."

"Why did you never go for it with Luke?"

Leia stared blankly at him for a moment, wondering if she'd misheard him. "Excuse me?"

"You know, Luke. You two are the same age. He saved you on the Death Star. You're obviously pretty close. It doesn't take a genius to figure that you two would've made a good pair."

"It just wasn't like that, Han."

"He wanted it to be."

"I know." Leia shrugged and began to twist a strand of loose hair around her finger. She knew all too well what Luke had thought about her in the early days. She had felt such a strong connection with Luke immediately, and he was such a wonderful friend…and then things grew complicated once it became obvious that he wanted to be more than friends.

And she didn't.

Han was right—on the outside it seemed like a perfect match, but on the inside it just felt wrong to Leia. For a time, she'd considered throwing caution to the wind and seeing if she could have a relationship with her new friend, believing that she was overthinking things as usual and that she needed a distraction from all her new burdens. But every time Leia thought about Luke, she just couldn't consider him as anything more than a friend. It hurt her, knowing that her disinterest was hurting him. She didn't want to make him upset. She wanted him to be happy. But she wasn't the right person to make him happy, and she didn't know why.

Perhaps that was the reason why she believed so strongly that Luke should now throw caution to the wind so he could be with Mara Jade. Leia wasn't blind, and knew that some people believed that she was jealous of Luke's new closeness with the redheaded pilot, but it wasn't like that at all. Her connection—her friendship—with Luke was something completely different, something she couldn't explain. But it was there, and it was special, and she and Luke were finally free of all the awkwardness that had plagued those first few months, and she was glad.

Finally, Leia glanced up and met Han's curious eyes. "It just didn't feel right."

"That's it? It didn't feel right?"

"Yes."

"You women and your emotions. Sometimes, I really don't get it."

Leia rolled her eyes. "I thought you knew everything about women, Captain?"

"Most of 'em, yeah. But some…some of you keep me flustered."

He stared at her boldly and Leia held his gaze as long as she could before finally turning away in a huff. "Well, anyway, I just never felt that way about him. Plus, I had other things on my mind."

That seemed to pique Han's interest, and he leaned even closer. "Really, Princess? What 'other' things?"

"My work in the Alliance, of course."

"Really? Is that all that was keeping your mind off of Luke?"

Leia suddenly realized what he was insinuating and blushed furiously. "Whatever you're implying, Captain Solo, you'd do best to forget about it."

"Oh, I don't agree with that at all."

Once again Leia made a grab for her datapad, but Han blocked her hand and she found herself almost flush against him. She looked up, gaze lingering on his full lips, before locking eyes with him once again. She abruptly pushed herself away. "I don't have time for these sorts of things, Captain Solo. That's why nothing ever happened with Luke."

"I thought you said nothing ever happened with Luke because you didn't feel the same way about him?

"I…yes…you know what I mean!" Oh, he was so good at making her flustered—she wanted to scream!

"I think I do, Princess. And I think that you're wrong."

Leia remained facing away from him, but he still reached out and began to slowly trail his fingers along her arm, sending shivers down her spine. She tried to pull away, but she just couldn't. Nobody had ever touched her that way before and surprisingly…it felt good.

Nobody had ever touched her that way before…

Her head snapped up abruptly and her hand grasped his, stopping his movements, but she didn't let go. Her gaze turned hard as she finally admitted to herself that yes, she did have some romantic feelings for Han, but nothing could ever come of them even if he reciprocated. "I am ten years younger than you," she reminded him softly.

Han swallowed hard. "I know."

"You…you've been around the galaxy and back. I'm a sheltered Princess."

"You ain't sheltered."

"You've said so yourself."

"Well I take it back."

Leia almost—almost—smiled. "I'm just a girl, Han. I'm not what you want."

"Oh, don't you worry, Princess—you are all woman to me." His voice deepened and his other hand reached out grasp her shoulder, pulling her closer to him. Her mind screamed at her to pull away but she couldn't…she just couldn't…

He leaned his head down to whisper in her ear, "And you are what I want."

"No I'm not—"

Without giving her a chance to finish her words, Han leaned in so his mouth was mere millimeters away from hers. He stopped at the last minute, giving her a final chance to pull away, but she didn't. She couldn't. Instead she looked up at him through hooded, lustful eyes, and tried vainly to convince herself that this was a bad idea—

"I don't think we should be doing this…"

His mouth, so close to hers, turned up in a smirk. "That's the problem, sweetheart. You think too much."

He bent down, closing the final distance between them—

The Falcon lurched, its trademark movement of being pulled out of hyperspace, ending their kiss before it could even begin. Leia fell forward onto Han and he instinctively grabbed her waist with one arm while grabbing the dejarik table with the other, keeping them from flying across the hold. The room was suddenly filled with an awkward silence.

But then Leia looked up at him, a sense of dread growing in the back of her mind that had absolutely nothing to do with her lying across Han's lap. "We weren't supposed to revert yet, were we?" she whispered.

Han shook his head, his expression as serious as her words had sounded. "No, we weren't."

Chewie's howls from the cockpit punctuated their concern. Without another word, the pair bounded off the acceleration couch and sprinted towards the cockpit.

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Running her hands across her instrument panel, Mara checked her hyperspace timer. There was only two hours left before they would arrive at Drunost. She shifted in her seat, trying to stretch her legs and get comfortable. She'd gotten used to sitting in cramped cockpits for extended periods of time, but it was always somewhat uncomfortable. She never complained, nor did any other of the Rogues, but she wouldn't have objected to traveling to their missions in a larger starship. Of course, that was impossible due to the lack of command ships and the need for secrecy on their missions.

Since they'd left Home One, Mara could do nothing else but think about those last few moments with Luke. She placed her finger to her lips, remembering what his had felt like against hers, still in disbelief that he had kissed her…

His lips had felt warm and soft and oh, how she wanted to taste them again. The kiss had sent shivers down her spine, an emotion no man had ever drawn from her before.

Then again, she had never felt so strongly about a man before. She'd had dalliances back in the Palace but nothing serious; she would never have let a relationship come between herself and her work. A relationship would have been a liability, and although he'd never spoken of it directly, she'd known that Palpatine would not have approved of her becoming anything other than physically involved with a man.

But now...the things she felt for Luke were much stronger than a mere teenage crush. She truly cared for him, wanted to learn more about him, wanted to be with him. Even more, she had felt his emotions and knew that he felt the same way about her. She'd been somewhat shocked, wondering when exactly such a strong connection through the Force had manifested, and wondering what would happen between them in the future.

Could they be together? It was against the rules as long as she remained in his squadron. He was her commanding officer. There was one simple solution: she could leave the squadron.

Could she do that? Could she give up something she'd worked hard for, just so she could have a chance at romance, and a normal life?

Luke was special; that had been clear since the moment she first laid eyes on him. And he felt the same way about her—that she was special, too. In the Empire, many men had clamored to be with her, but they hadn't known her at all. She'd just been an ornament, a pretty girl to use as arm decoration or some quick pleasure, not a real person with emotions and feelings and a personality.

But Luke...Luke knew her and he still wanted to be with her.

Oh, how did her life end up this way? A year ago she was the Emperor's Hand, serving the Empire without question, confident and feared. Now she was a pilot in the Rebellion…and completely and utterly lovesick for her commanding officer.

She wondered about the conversation they would have once they returned to Home One. Had he figured out a way for them to get around regulations? Would he ask her to hide a relationship? Would he ask her to leave the squadron?

Would she actually consider doing such a thing?

Hadn't she already done just that?

She closed her eyes and saw Luke taking her in his arms. She saw herself sitting close with him and confessing her deepest, darkest secrets while he nodded in understanding, hugging her intimately and telling her that everything would be okay. She saw them serving together throughout the war, until the fighting finally ended with the Emperor's death.

Her eyes snapped open—had those possibilities been the results of her overactive imagination, or had they been a message from the Force—visions of the future?

Was that even possible?

Mara didn't have a chance to consider.

Her X-wing lurched and the hyperspace patterns outside her window dissolved into stars. "What the—?" she exclaimed, banging against the console. Had her hyperdrive gone out? She glanced around and saw the other ships around her, so that couldn't be a possibility... "Red, what's going on?" she demanded.

Her astromech blurted a plaintive tweet, and she looked down at her data screen. "Gravity well? But our plot didn't take us near any planets…"

Wes's voice was loud in her helmet as she banked her X-wing in a tight roll, coming up on Tycho's starboard side: "Son of a schutta!"

"Cut the chatter, Five!" Luke yelled back, but his admonishment wasn't as harsh at it normally would be.

And, once again looking outside the cockpit, Mara understood why.

They'd been pulled out of hyperspace by an interdictor cruiser.

And directly facing them was the Executor.