Hey so if anyone reading this remembers the weird neighbor guy Clay from the first and second books, he is in this fanfic. However, I didn't remember his last name and was too lazy to look for it. Thanks.
It had been a week and a half since we had all arrived in Cousins. I still couldn't shake the feeling that Susanna was in the house with us. The other day, I thought I saw her when I was out swimming. Since the first night, I hadn't had a real conversation with Conrad. Jeremiah, on the other hand, couldn't get enough of real conversations. I didn't really want to talk about myself, so I just asked him questions and then pretended to be nterested in the answers. As much as I loved Jere, my heart only ever belonged to one guy. My breakfast thoughts were interrupted by the doorbell.
"I'll get it." I said sarcastically. I got down off my stool and took my cereal bowl over to the door with me. I opened it to find a very attractive blonde in a very tight fitting outfit. Wow she was pretty.
"Hey. Is Conrad home?" She asked surprisingly sweetly.
"Um..no he isn't. Do you want me to tell him you stopped by?" I smiled politely.
"Um, yeah I guess. Just tell him his girlfriend stopped by." She reciprocated a polite smile and waved as she turned around and walked away. I stood in the doorway with my jaw on the floor. Oh my god. How dare he. I couldn't even express my anger, the amount of betrayal I felt. All this time I hadn't even looked at another man. I knew that he was the only person I could ever want. I guess he didn't feel the same.
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What? A girlfriend? Why wouldn't he tell me? Okay, I know why Conrad wouldn't tell me. Because hes an asshole. But my mom? Steven? Jere? I can't believe this. I was sitting on the couch contemplating this when someone walked in. It was the boys. I stood up and twirled around quickly and put on a smile. I decided at that moment that I would wait for him to tell me about his sexy little girlfriend.
"Hey guys." I started walking towards the stairs.
"Hey Belly. What's up? Jeremiah turned towards me and gave me a sincere smile.
"Hey. I was going to go to the farmer's market to pick up some stuff...do you wanna come?" I didn't look at Conrad as I invited Jere out.
"Sure...lemme put this stuff down and then we can go." Jere quickly disappeared into the kitchen. I stood with Conrad for about a minute in awkward silence before I looked at him. I silently conveyed how annoyed I was, but before I could say anything, Jeremiah was back.
"Ready?" He raised his eyebrows at me and dangled the car keys in the air.
"Yep." I snatched them and moved past them both towards the door.
"Um three is probably good. I don't eat apples that much. Maybe my mom will eat them." I shrugged and handed Jere a plastic bag and a twisty tie.
"Jere!" An obnoxious yell came from a couple yards away. Clay Fisher came walking towards us with a huge grin. Jere met him half way.
"What is up man!" Jere did some sort of man hand shake/hug with Clay.
"Y'know, here for the summer. What are you guys up to?" Clay still had on a goofy grin.
"Me and Belly are just doing some shopping." Jere gestured to me as he spoke.
"Anything fun going on don't know about?" Clay threw a lemon up and caught it again.
"Nah, man. Just chilling actually. Ask Con maybe." Jeremiah was being evasive now. He knew Clay partied hard. Hearing Conrads name struck a chord. I couldn't really explain why I said what I said next.
"Actually...we're having a party tomorrow night. You can bring whoever you want. In fact, spread the word." I smiled and definitely did not look in Jeremiah's direction for his confused expression.
"Bells.." Jere started before Clay interrupted.
"Sweeet! Sounds good. Will you be there Belly?" Clay said.
"Yep. You might want to tell everyone to bring some stuff, my mom isn't too big on the drinks." I knew Jeremiah was getting more upset at every word.
"Cool. Well I have to go but I'll see you guys tomorrow?" Clay walked away excitedly. Jere took my shoulder and lightly spinned me around to face him.
"What the hell was that?" Jeremiah looked extremely confused.
"What?" I played dumb.
"That! Since when can you just decide to throw a rager at my moms house?" Jeremiah was getting a little angry.
"Actually, your mom left it to all of us. Lighten up Jere, it's a party. My mom will be at home, she has a business meeting and she is spending the night in the city." I kept the tone very light.
"Whatever, just don't expect me to clean up this mess." He shrugged, still confused.
"But you're coming rightttttt?" I smiled innocently as we walked toward the car with our food.
"Yeah, yeah, as long as you don't take advantage of me. I know you can't keep your hands off of me." Jeremiah laughed at his own joke as I smacked him on the arm.
"Just drive you goof." I laughed as I got into the car.
I knew that as soon as we got home Jeremiah would find the first opportunity to tell Steven and Con about my spur of the moment party plans. Steven would be pissed at first, but then psyched about a party. Conrad would be disapproving and pretend like he didn't care but then show up and act like he didn't care again. Typical. So, as soon as we got home, I ran to my room and turned on some music so nobody would come in. I wasn't paying attention and accidentally knocked over my old jewelry box that Susanna gave me. Luckily, it didn't break, so I bent down to gather up all of the stuff that had fallen out. I first just knelt down. I picked up an old necklace with a rubber string and a cheesy dolphin charm. I sat down to get more comfortable as I looked through my old stuff. Jeremiah had bought me that necklace for my 8th birthday. I remember Susanna's face when she saw it. She was so proud of Jeremiah. She was always the most proud of them when she saw them making me happy. She always said I would end up with one of them.
"It's beautiful Belly." Susanna smiled, and her eyes sparkled. There she was, sitting right in front of me in my room. I shook my head and put my hand over my eyes. When I looked again, she wasn't there. I shook off the feeling and threw everything back in the box and slammed it onto my dresser. Not here, not now. Things were different, Susanna is dead. And I have a party to plan. I left my room and went downstairs to find nobody there. Conrad probably knew by now, so I decided to get out of the house before he had the chance to talk to me. About thirty minutes later, I found myself in the Cousins liquor store in the alcohol aisle. I didn't even recognize half of these bottles, let alone know which ones were expected to be at a party.
"Belly?" A voice surprised me from behind. I turned around to find Clay.
"Hey, Clay. What are you doing here?" I made conversation.
"Just picking up some brewski's. You getting ready for the party?"
"Yeah, actually I was just picking up some drinks...I left my i.d. at home though." I lied.
"Ah, no problem I've got it. Just give me the cash." Clay shrugged. Even when he was doing me a favor he was still annoying.
"Cool. Thanks Clay." I turned back to the selection and sighed. For the next five minutes, Clay told me exactly what to get and we picked out at least 15 packs of beer, a couple huge bottles of vodka and tequila, and some hard lemonade. Personally, I never really loved alcohol or the fact that it made me sick the next day. I didn't plan on drinking at this party, partly because I was sure that Jere, Con, and Steve would never let me. When I got home, I had to figure out how to get all of the alcohol into the house without making a show of it. I decided to leave it in my car until I needed to bring it in. I went into the house and hung my keys up. Shit, I didn't realize how late it was. I guess I had been out all day. I heard my brother and Jeremiah's voices in the living room.
"Haa you suck at this game man." My obnoxious brother threw down his controller in triumph. I walked into the living room and plopped onto the couch.
"Do you guys want to watch a movie or something?" I put my feet up on the coffee table.
"Fine but I get to choose!" Steven sprung up and walked over to the dvd collection. Jeremiah popped up off of the floor and sat next to me on the couch.
"So, where have you been all day?" Jere took a bowl of cheetos and threw his hand in and then looked over to me curiously.
"Out." I smiled at him and laughed.
"Okay mrs. mysterious. But just to let you know, I know that you have been going to see my mom." He looked in my eyes. I didn't know what to say. "Your secret is safe with me." He smiled at me apologetically and turned his attention to Steven. "Pick anything yet you goon?"
"I've got it. The Terminator. Perfect." Steven threw it in the dvd player and sat next to Jere on the couch. We watched the whole thing, but both Steve and Jere fell asleep towards the end. Once it was over, I woke them both up and they groggily made their way to bed. I wasn't quite tired yet so I went out to my car and grabbed a bottle of beer. I leaned on the side of my car and took a few sips before making my way to the backyard. I looked around and saw that there was no lights on in the house. I took of my clothes and chugged the rest of the beer before diving into the pool. It was cold and refreshing. I swam a couple laps, almost forgetting that I was kind of tipsy and completely nude. I stopped swimming and held onto the edge, taking in the night. I took a couple deep breaths, looking at my breath in the cold night air.
"What are you doing Belly?" I turned around and saw Susanna standing at the edge of the pool with a smile on her face.
"What are you doing here?" I looked at her in disbelief.
"Drinking Belly? Parties? Skinny Dipping at two in the morning? This isn't the Belly I know." Susanna sat on a tanning chair.
"Knew. You're dead now. Remember? Which is why I ask again, what are you doing here?" I rested my chin on the edge of the pool.
"Don't you miss me?" Susanna smiled.
"Of course I do. It's just hard when I keep...seeing you." I shook my head. When I looked back up at her for a response, she was gone. My heart clenched and it felt like I was having a heart attack. I always got that feeling when I missed Susanna too much. I let myself sink underwater and closed my eyes. I thought about one summer about 5 years ago. I was entering my pre-teen years, and Susanna had convinced the boys to let me go with them to paintball. Steven told me a million times that it wasn't something i'd like, and that it wasn't for girls. Him saying that only made me want to go even more, mostly to prove to Conrad how cool I was. After I ended up crying because Steven hit me in the stomach with a paintball, Conrad took me in the car and waited for me to stop crying and bought me ice cream afterwards. Not even Steven said anything on the way home because he knew Conrad would be mad. I would've kept daydreaming underwater but I heard my voice so I opened my eyes. I looked up from underwater and saw a man standing there. Jeremiah?
"Belly?" His muffled voice was hard to hear from underwater, but I could still make out my name. Then it dawned on me that I wasn't wearing any clothes, and oh yeah, I can't breathe underwater. When I resurfaced, I only floated high enough so my head came out of the dark water. I gasped for air and looked up at him.
"Hey, Jere." It was pretty awkward considering the fact that I was naked. I was desperately hoping he didn't see my clothes on the lounge chair behind him.
"What are you doing?" He furrowed his brows.
"Swimming." I kept the conversation short so he would leave and I could shamefully put my clothes back on and run to my room as fast as the time when Steven was chasing after me for taking the last blue popsicle.
"Well when I swim I usually come up for air." He said jokingly with a hint of concern.
"I was just thinking. I do my best thinking underwater." I kept a straight face for a moment then smiled. Jere cracked up. He started walking towards the house and turned when he grabbed the handle to the sliding glass door.
"Belly, if something is wrong, you know you can talk to me right?"
"Yeah. Of course. I'm just really nervous about college and I'm just dealing with some...stuff."
"Well, you know where to find me." He looked at me one last time before going inside. The truth was, I wasn't nervous about college at all. The real truth was that I was still in love with a boy who I thought loved me, but actually loves someone else. Or at least is hooking up with her. It's been almost two years, and I can't seem to move on from Susanna's death. Truth is, I keep seeing her, and I don't know whether I am confused or crazy.
The next morning, everything seemed like one long hazy dream. Except that it wasn't. I heard voices outside my window so I peeked outside. Conrad and Jeremiah were going surfing. Conrad had his long blue board and Jeremiah's was faint yellow. I quickly threw on my cousins beach t-shirt and a pair of jeans and went downstairs. Steven was sitting in the living room watching some game show and eating lucky charms. I walked past him and went into the kitchen to get myself a bowl of Cap'n Crunch. Jeremiah's favorite. Usually Susanna was the one to buy all the sugary cereals because my mom always wanted whole wheat and grains. My mom must have bought them this time. I didn't notice myself smiling until Steven pointed it out.
"What are you so happy about?" Steven walked into the kitchen to put away his bowl.
"Nothing. What are you doing today?" I poured the milk into my cereal bowl.
"I don't know. I think I might apply for a job at the crab shack. Make some more money before sophomore year.
Random place to stop, I know, but I felt like I needed to update.
Let me know what you think would happen at the party!