Previously: "Whoa! Sorry." Edward said and turned around. I walked over to him and grabbed his hand. He turned around and I looked into his eyes. They were green. They were so beautiful. Then I looked at his lips. They looked so good. I noticed he didn't really know what to do right now so I leaned in and kissed him.
He seemed a little hesitant but still kissed me back. I could tell that he had been drinking too. I started to unbutton his shirt and he pulled it off then stopped kissing me.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" He looked at me and I knew that I did. I wanted to so bad and I didn't know why or where this was coming from. I nodded at him and then grabbed him and started kissing him again. He pushed me on the bed and started kissing down my neck trailed down between my breasts and then down to my belly button. I started moaning and was glad that there was music on downstairs.
He grabbed my skirt and started unbuttoning it and slid it off of me. He grunted once he saw my matching thong and he practically ripped them off. I was so wet and he was so hot it was turning me on. I couldn't help it. I sat up and started to unbutton his jeans and his underwear and I couldn't believe how big he was! I was sure it wasn't going to fit. He saw my panicked face and looked at me.
"Are you sure you want to do this?" I was a little scared but I was too horny to care right now. I reached behind me and took off my bra. His eyes went straight toward my chest. He leaned me down and started licking and sucking on my nipples. "Oh my god you are so hot!" He was hovering over me and he looked down he placed his dick right at my entrance and pushed in slowly.
I could feel the pain and I knew there was going to be more. I didn't know if I should tell him I was a virgin or not. Would that stop him? My thoughts stopped once I felt an intense pain. I cried out in pain and he noticed.
"Are you okay?" He looked down and I did too. There was a little bit of blood and he looked at me with a horrified expression. "Fuck! Are you a virgin?" I wrapped my legs around his waist so he couldn't pull up.
"Please don't stop!" I thrust my hips forward and I felt a little bit of pain but I didn't want him to stop. He closed his eyes as he felt the pleasure run through his body. He started slowly but couldn't take it anymore. He started going faster and the pain started to go away a little bit. I started to feel some pleasure and I liked it a lot! How could I have not done this before?
Before I could have an orgasm I heard him grunt and felt warmth fill me. He got off me and layed beside me. "That was amazing. I'm sorry for hurting you." He looked sleepy and I had to admit I was a little tired too. Before I even realized it I was sleeping in his arms.
I opened my eyes and the sun was in my face. The sun was never shining through my windows in the morning. I looked around the room and I started to panic. This isn't my room! I tried to think about what happened last night and I remember James and that guy helping me... What was his name? Ugh and then I remember coming up in this room and—OMG! No… no no no!
I got out of the bed and nobody else was in it. He must have left already. I would too. I grabbed my clothes and noticed my cell phone. I looked and saw I had 10 missed calls from Alice and 13 text messages. I hurried downstairs hoping Jasper wasn't awake. I didn't want him to know about last night and I didn't hear anything so I went straight out the door. I knew Alice must have left so I decided I would walk home.
How could I be so stupid! I slept with him and he even gave me a chance to back out but I kept going! I am never drinking that much ever again! Maybe not even drink for a few years! I looked up and noticed I was at our apartment. Once I opened the door Alice was there asking a billion questions.
"Where the hell were you? Why weren't you answering my calls? I was worried about you! What if something happened? How could you do that to me? Are you okay? What happened?" She was starting to get a little too worked up and so I sat her down.
"Alice… I met somebody. Well I don't remember the meeting because I was wasted and I don't remember his name but we had sex." I was waiting for her to start screaming and jumping up and down because I finally lost my V-card but she didn't.
"Oh." That's all she said. She looked a little disappointed. Hmm?
"Alice, what's wrong? I thought you wanted me to meet somebody. Or at least have sex finally. Now you seem all bummed." She looked up slowly.
"Well I wanted you to meet Jasper's cousin and I thought things would happen. I met him last night and he seemed so perfect. He is staying with jasper and we talked but then he left and didn't see him after so I don't know much about him but I thought you guys would hit it off." I felt kind of bad now. Maybe I should still meet Jasper's cousin. Though I doubt he would compare to the guy from the party last night. He was so perfect!
"I'm sorry Alice. I really am. Maybe I can meet him still? Do you think?" She looked up and shrugged. Was it upsetting her that much?
"Ali what's wrong? Did I do something else?" She got up and started to get out some eggs to cook.
"No, me and Jasper got into a fight and I have kind of been down. That's why I didn't stay over last night." She starting cooking the eggs and I could tell she was really upset.
"Oh Ali what happened? I'm sure you two will work it out! You guys are meant to be together."
"We were really drunk and I went to go get more drinks and when I came back some bitch named Maria was grinding on him and then I saw her kiss him! And he didn't push her away! I guess it was his ex girlfriend and it was nothing but I saw what I saw. I cant believe he did that." I noticed she was crying and I went over to hug her. My night goes good for once and hers goes bad.
"I'm so sorry. Do you think you will work it out?" She nodded.
"I know we will. But I just needed a little space. Maybe two days apart will be good." I know it may seem like that is hardly anytime but for Alice and Jasper it was! They were together all the time. They rarely fought and I feel bad for them when they do.
The week went by pretty quickly. I went to work on Monday through Friday at the coffee shop down the street. Alice and Jasper made up and pretty loudly I might add on Tuesday. I hate to put headphones in and turn up my music loud so I wouldn't be able to hear the sounds coming from Alice's room. Gross.
I never really heard from that guy from the party. I still can't remember his name and its killing me. I at least want to know his name. He probably hasn't thought of me since thought so I should really just let this go.
About 3 weeks after the party and things weren't going as great. I had no homework to think about and I was so bored being at the house. I had been off of work the last two days because I haven't been feeling well. I puked again this morning and afternoon so I called in sick once again. I wonder if there is a bug going around. Alice has noticed me being sick so she has been staying with Jasper.
She called every night so far asking if I was feeling better. Apparently Jasper's cousin is amazing and he was staying for a month before heading back to Chicago. She asked when I would want to meet him. I told her maybe on Friday so I can get to feeling better.
Friday came and I was getting ready. I hadn't been sick today yet so things were looking good. Maybe they would stay that way and I can have a nice lunch with Jasper, Alice, and his cousin. I was leaving the house and we were going to meet at a place for lunch. Alice met me outside.
"Bella! I'm so glad you came. You're feeling better right?" She looked me up and down like there would be a sign on my body telling her I was still sick. I laughed at her.
"I feel fine Alice. Don't worry." We started heading inside and then Jasper came and gave me a hug.
"Bella I'm glad you could make it. This is my cousin, Edward. Edward this is Bella." He gestured his hand behind him and I looked.
Oh my god! His eyes locked with mine and I could see he knew who I was too. Suddenly I wasn't feeling so well again I ran to the bathroom. I threw up again. Alice was right behind me.
"Bella! Bella are you okay? What's wrong? Im really worried." She opened the stall and came in.
"That's him." I said before I threw up again.
"Who Bella? What are you talking about?" She looked so confused.
"The guy I had sex with at the party!"
Alice just stood there not sure of what to do or say. I got up and cleaned myself up. And started heading for the door. Alice grabbed my hand.
"Are you sure that you're okay to go out there? You wont get sick again? Maybe we should go to the doctor." She looked concerned for me. I didn't really like going to the doctors because they creeped me out. I have been getting sick a lot though. Maybe something was wrong.
"Sure Alice. I will go to the doctors and yeah I'm fine. I just got a little nervous is all." With that I walked out of the bathroom. Jasper and Edward were sitting at the table waiting for us. They both looked kind of nervous. When we got over to the table Jasper stood up.
"Bella are you okay? Are you still sick?" He looked at Edward and gave him a look. I didn't know what that was about.
"I don't know Jazz. I felt fine this morning. I'm sorry Edward; I have been feeling sick all week. I think I got the flu. I think I'm going to go home and lay down a bit." I gave Jasper a hug and then Alice. I didn't know if I should give Edward one or not because yeah we had sex but I didn't really know him.
I waved goodbye and left. I hope I didn't hurt his feelings. I got in my truck and started driving to my apartment. Once I was at our place I got on the phone and called the doctor to set up an appointment. They could get me in tomorrow so I agreed.
After the phone call was over I went to the kitchen to get some crackers and a glass of water. I went up stairs and went straight to bed. I didn't know I was that tired.
When I woke up it was dark so I turned and looked at the clock. It read 3:24. I grabbed the crackers and ate a few because I missed dinner and was really hungry. I drank my water and then turned on the small TV that was in my room.
I was flipping through the channels and found something sort of interesting I guess. I started dozing off and I fell asleep shortly after.
I woke up and it was kind of bright outside. I opened my eyes and noticed my TV was still on. I got up and turned it off. I looked at the clock and it read 10:47. I had my appointment in about an hour. I decided to get ready. I got in the shower and thought of when I saw Edward. He looked good. I wonder why he looked so nervous and Jasper gave him that look.
Edward probably just told him about what happened. That's all. He really looked good. His reddish brown hair color, his perfect lips, perfect legs. As my mind kept thinking about him I kept thinking of that night at the party. He was so good.
I got out of the shower and went to go make coffee. Alice was sitting there already with a cup in her hand and reading a book. She looked up at me and smiled. It didn't quite reach her eyes and I knew something was up. When I went to get my cup I noticed the time.
I must have been thinking a little bit too long in the shower because I needed to leave soon.
"Ali my doctor's appointment is in 15 minutes and I really need to go. We will talk after because I can tell something is up." I put down my coffee and started to the door.
"Wait Bella I have to tell you something. You know that night of the party. Jasper told me something that Edward told me and—"I cut her off my shutting the door. I didn't mean to be rude but I really needed to go.
I was driving and trying to concentrate and where I was going when Alice called me. What does she need to tell me that can't wait? I didn't want to talk on the phone while driving so I just ignored it. When I was parking my car I started to get really nervous. What if I was really sick or what if something was wrong?
I got out of the car and walked to the building. I told the person at the desk that I was here and then sat down. I started tapping my leg and I couldn't think. I hated doctors. They scared me.
"Bella." Some brown haired girl named Jessica called me back and told me to sit down. She asked me a few questions about what was going on. "The doctor will be in here in just a moment." Then she was gone. I have never been here before so I didn't know what to expect.
"Hello my name is Dr. Denali. What's going on with you?" She seemed really nice and had blonde hair. I told her about me throwing up recently and that it was going on for about a week now. "Bella are you sexually active?" That question confused me.
"No. I'm not." Then I started thinking and there was Edward. "Well there was this one time. But it was only once." No. She can't be saying what I think she is.
"Were you two safe about it? Are you on birth control and did he wear a condom?" I starting thinking and I didn't remember him putting on a condom but I was drunk so I don't remember a lot of things.
"Um I don't think so." She wrote something down and then handed me something. It looked like a little cup.
"I need you to go pee in this and bring it back to me. You know there is a chance you could be pregnant." I could feel myself start to cry and I headed toward the bathrooms. Stupid Edward. Stupid stupid Edward. Wait. No. Stupid me! I let him! How could I be so stupid?
I went and peed in the cup and then brought it back to her. She left the room. I didn't know what to do. Or what to think. I can't be pregnant. I felt my stomach and nothing seemed different. It was still flat. I didn't know what to expect.
When she came back in she was smiling. That must be good. She is happy so it must have same out negative right? "Congratulations! You're going to be a mommy!" No. You can't be happy about that. Why is she so happy? I wanted to punch that smile right off her face.
I didn't remember anything after that. I couldn't think. I didn't know what to think. All I remember is driving. I don't remember where I was going but I ended up at my apartment. I don't remember walking but I was at the door. As I opened the door two people came beside me and asked me questions but I didn't really hear it. I saw him. He was sitting on the couch looking nervous.
"You." He looked up at me. "Get out of my house! How could you do this to me! I was drunk! You couldn't wear a condom! What is wrong with you! I hate you! Get out now!" I was walking toward him and yelling then I fell to my knees and started crying. They all knew. They had to. That's what was making them nervous. Edward told Jasper he didn't wear a condom and—I can't do this. I can't be a mom.
"I can't do this." I whispered. Edward was still in front of me and he heard what I said.
"I know you don't want to but we have to. I'm sorry. I was drunk too but that's no excuse. I'm sorry. We will do this. Together." I knew he wouldn't do this. He was leaving in a week. How is he going to help me when he is in Chicago? He can't. I got up and went to the phone book and grabbed the phone. I saw what I was looking for and I dialed the numbers in.
They answered and I wasn't going to waste anytime. "I need an appointment for an abortion." I was in a different room because they went to talk in a different room, probably about me. I set up the appointment and then said bye.
I was walking in the room and they were all whispering but stopped once they saw me. "Hey Bella." I set the phone down and ignored the person who said that.
"Alice I have an appointment for an abortion on Wednesday and I need you to come with me." She gasped and I looked at Edward. His face was blank. I figured he didn't care so I just walked away. As I was leaving the room I heard a big bang.
"That's my child too Bella! You cant just decide that on your own!" And I heard another loud noise like a door shutting and then nothing. I started thinking about it and I don't know if I could do that. I don't want a baby because I am not ready but killing it? I heard a knock on the door.
"Bella, I think we need to talk. Are you sure you can do that. Edward doesn't want this and it IS his too." She started rubbing my leg and I started crying.
"I shouldn't have had sex with him Alice. I need to go away. I think I'm going to go visit my mom and tell her and she will tell me what she thinks I should do." Alice and I started talking more and we were thinking of what to do. We decided I wouldn't get an abortion yet until I decided what I wanted to do. I got a flight to go visit my mom and no return ticket because I didn't know when I would be ready to come back.
I packed all my things and Alice told Jasper what was going on who probably told Edward. I got to the airport and got a text but didn't recognize the number. It only had two words.
Thank you.
My flight was being called so I put my phone away and went to my flight.