title: love month
prompt: SASUSAKU MONTH ON LJ!
rating: T-M
summary: oo9; In which Sasuke transforms into a girl in order to snoop on Sakura. Chaos ensures.
.oo9.
Snoop
"Come on, Sasuke. Couldn't you have been a little more romantic?" Sakura said as Sasuke was bleeding through the nose, his face covered in bruises and a towel around his waist. Sakura, frowning, held her own towel over her body and one in her hair.
"Really. I mean, it's romantic when Hinata's bathing slash training in the waterfall at midnight, and Naruto just so happens to come upon her and stalk her from the grass as her body shines, but snooping in a hot spring? Really? It seems like you've been trained by Jiraiya rather than Naruto has.
"Can we, like, not talk about this?" Sasuke said, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I'll take your stupid lecture later. Right now, get down on your knees and heal me. You pack one hell of a punch."
"Not until you realize what you did wrong," Sakura scoffed. "Seriously? If you had to snoop on me, couldn't you have done it more secretly? I mean, sharingan. There's another daily reason to use it. But nooo. You use it for battle. Which, I totally understand, but there are other reasons. If I had awesome vision, I would use to its fullest extent. At least you don't have the Byakugan…oh, poor Neji…Lee's on his team, too…"
"Hey, hey, hey. I'm bleeding."
Sakura sighed, sitting down and making herself comfortable as she took Sasuke's hands away and nearly flinched at the sight of his blood. "Ouch…" she mumbled.
"Tell me about it."
Sakura then put her hands over his nose, and he immediately felt a soothing relief as he moaned and closed his eyes, replaying the short-lived but definitely worth it clip.
.
.
.
"Isn't this nice? A whole bath all to myself," Sakura said as she entered the hot spring, sighing in relief as she let the towel drop on the side and spreading her arms out. Thankfully, it wasn't a mixed bath, and the rest of her team was on the other side of the fence. Four horny men wanting to spy on women through peepholes while their erections awkwardly poked the other underwater, everyone too embarrassed to wonder who touched who.
"No obaa-sans, no Narutos, no Jiraiyas…just Team 7, with everyone else on the other side while sweet Sakura-chan gets time to herself." Sakura sighed in relief, splashing water happily. "My life is good!"
The boys, hearing this conversation through the thin fence, pressed their ears up. "Sounds like she's the only one in there," Sasuke muttered.
"No shit, Sherlock. What made you think that?" Naruto muttered as he attempted to sneak over the fence. Sai bonked him on the head.
"You idiot! We cut a hole through the fence."
"Dumbass, I think she can see," Kakashi said, reading his book while his other hand was…somewhere in the water. Down under "the sea."
All of them sighed, and Sasuke rested his arms on the rock, creating an image on what Sakura would look like through the fog and steam.
She would look so pretty…
"Hey guys? How is it over there?" Sakura said, pressing her ear against the fence. "Doing well?"
"You could say that," Sai scoffed as he lied back on the rocks. "It's good for me. Can't say the same for everyone else."
"Well…" Sakura sighed. "I think it's really great here. It was so nice of Kakashi-sensei to bring us here. Sensei? Can you hear me? Thank you!" she squealed as she continued to splash water. "I love it! It's such a vacation from training and doctor stuff and dealing with you all…oh wait, you're still here," Sakura muttered. "But it's still nice."
"You're welcome," Kakashi muttered, not paying attention. One of his hands was still unseen. The other was on his book.
Sasuke felt his nose bleed and the water around him quickly turning red. He put his hand over his nose and excused himself, putting the towel around his waist without having to flash his little red butt-cheeks to Naruto, who would laugh, and Sai, who would begin the comments likewise to Naruto's penis.
Imagining Sakura. Alone. Naked. In a hot spring.
He would have to write to Playboy about this.
.
.
.
The only way he would be able to spy on her was if he turned into a girl. Sasuke didn't want to have to do this, but…
He cursed and hid in an empty room, performing hand seals and watching his muscular body turn into a feminine one with curves, breasts, and…no, er, "thing."
"Now I know how being a girl feels like…hm, this is probably why Naruto likes gender-bending so much. So that he can play with his own tits," Sasuke said, looking down at his newfound breasts. "Not bad."
He looked beautiful, to say the least. After all, he was handsome when he was a guy and so it should have been normal to be beautiful as a woman.
Putting on a firm face, he muttered, "I'm going in."
.
.
.
As Sakura said, the women's bath was a lot less full and more relaxing. He only saw a couple of old ladies there talking in accented Japanese, and a few teenagers having fun. But there, in the middle, was Sakura. Sakura, who was naked from the shoulder down and lying her head on the towel that would cover her body…
Sasuke got another nosebleed. However, he managed to wipe it before anybody could see, and then slowly entered the hot tub, making his way over to Sakura.
She doesn't know you're Sasuke. Act like his, er, cousin. Yeah. The cousin that he never killed off.
"Hey," he said. He debated on shooting her a wink, but then thought otherwise.
Good choice.
"Uh, hi." Sakura looked at the she-male awkwardly, then looked down at her own chest, and blushed. Sasuke didn't realize why a girl's bust was worth being awkward about. It was two gaping piles of fat flesh with a nipple on it.
Attractive? Well, to him, yes.
Sasuke lied back on the rocks, his arms on either side of them. Sakura scooted away nervously. He didn't seem to notice.
"It's nice here, huh? You know? Just us girls on this side of the spring while those testosterone filled horny men are on the other, separated by a fence…" secretly, Sasuke had to thank Naruto for forcing him to watch reruns of Gossip Girl and 90210.
"I know, right?" Sakura moaned as she sank deeper into the water. "Isn't this nice?"
"Yeah…"
Just by observing Sakura, Sasuke nearly got another nosebleed. He could take her right here, right now, under the hot spring and she wouldn't know what hit her.
Well…metaphorically.
"W-What—is that—SASUKE!" she shrieked.
Apparently, his jutsu had worn off since he didn't know the proper chakra technique to handle it under the stress of hormones and…hormones.
The next thing that happened was Sasuke's ultimate dream. Playing Final Fantasy. Except that seeing Sakura naked (at least he got a good look at her bod) was nearly almost his final fantasy, he was punched over to the other side, floating in the air for about four minutes until he landed in the scalding water ten feet above.
Ouch.
.
.
.
"You're a pervert, you know that?" Sakura said as she healed his nose. "Really? You couldn't find something better to do? And, by the way, if that was your ultimate plan, couldn't you have been sneakier? I mean, duh, you're Uchiha Sasuke. A legend himself."
"I don't want to talk about it," Sasuke muttered.
"Too bad, because we will. Anyway, why couldn't you have just done the Naruto thing? Peep through a hole? Even that's better than transforming into a girl." Sakura sighed. "Wow. Just…wow."
"Shut up."
"No, not until I have my full share of gloating in your face."
Suddenly, Sasuke brought Sakura's head down to his own and pressed his lips against hers gently, feeling her waist against the white cotton towel.
Her hands were on his chest, feeling his torso and running her fingers down, her head moving to the right to get a better angle.
Pulling apart, Sasuke smirked. "You know, you're pretty when you're wet."
"You perv!"
"I know, but doesn't that make me all the more lovable?"
Sakura sighed. "Yeah. I guess it does."
"Come here."
He held her against him again, leading her to the hot spring, which was empty, and had her sit on his lap underwater (the poking part didn't happen until later, but even then, they just ran their courses) while he kissed her, his hands holding her firmly on the waist and nowhere else (due to the fact that she slapped his fingers away most of the time).
"You're beautiful," she murmured against his neck.
"Tch, I know," Sasuke said, chuckling. "Tell me something I don't know."
Sakura, growling, playfully elbowed him in the shoulder and he shrugged it off before holding her face in his hands again and leaning forward.
.
.
.
"You know, Sakura, if you really wanted to see it, you didn't have to transform into a guy. Plus, what heterosexual guy has pink hair?"
"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" she screeched. "So I was interested. Okay?"
"And…?" he smirked.
"And…I wanted to actually see if Naruto did have one or not."
Sasuke frowned.
Slight changes 7.8.14!