Chapter XVII: Brendan's Infatuated Rival
Previously on my stupid ass story…
"No!" the voice yelled. "It's Dr. Phil," he said while walking out of the shadows and a faint light came on. "I've taken you here for one reason and one reason only," he said while unzipping his pants…
And now, the exiting conclusion on what Dr. Phil will do to Brendan…later! Right now, lets go check May and Drew out...
"Hmm…" Drew said while pushing his hair back like a girl. "You did a nice job today May," he said
"You too Drew," May answered.
"But don't think I'll let you step on me in the finals May," he said while pushing his hair back again.
"I never thought that you would," May said.
"Well, this is exactly what's gonna happen," he said. "You and I are gonna face off with those other losers who won, then we'll win, then we'll face off with each other, I'm used to this sort of thing." He said.
"Um…" May started.
"Look, if you lose the semi-finals, then you'll never become a good coordinator," he said. "I even bet you don't know how to use a berry blender." He said.
"What," May asked.
"Just take the antidote, and you'll be fine," he said while hugging her, then walking out of the room laughing. May just looked confused as hell. But then she grinned from what she stole from him during the weird hug. She took out her Swellow, then had him eat some cube shaped things.
"Here are some nice Pokeblocks I stole from that retard Drew," she said while Swellow at some of the blocks…
"Ha," Drew said from in the hallway. "The stupid bitch doesn't even know I stole her wallet," he said while looking at all the money inside it…
And now the exiting conclusion on what's happening to Brendan…
"What are you doing," Brendan yelled. "I don't go that way!" he screamed. Dr. Phil just stared at Brendan in confusion.
"I know, but I'm just going to the damn urinal that you're beside," he said. Then Dr. Phil walked to the urinal, and then started to use the restroom beside Brendan, who was still tied up.
"Why am I tied up," he asked.
"Oh that's gum," Dr. Phil said as some lights came on, revealing that Brendan was on a huge wad of gum.
"Then get me out of it," Brendan said.
"Well can you wait, I'm taking a piss here," the doctor said.
"Hurry," Brendan said while struggling.
"Okay, this is how you do it," Dr. Phil said. "All you do is stay calm, then the gum wad spits you up." He said. "If you squirm too much, it'll suck you in," he said. Brendan started to relax, but as soon as he did, the gum wad started pulling him in! "Sorry, other way around," Dr. Phil said as he flushed the urinal, and started to wash his hands. Brendan continued to squirm, then it finally spit Brendan out.
"Now, for the thing that I came in here for," he said while holding his hand out to Brendan. Brendan was about to take it, the Dr. Phil took it away. "No, I'm not helping you up, I want the money you owe me for helping that guy see the light and not kick your ass to a pulp," he said while holding his hand out.
"But the guy said that he was going to run naked in the Petalburg Woods; that's the last thing that that forest needs, another guy running in the woods naked. Why can't it be girls," he asked.
"Wait, there's another guy running naked in the Petalburg Woods," Dr. Phil asked. "And if there is, how would you know?" he asked while eyeing Brendan suspiciously. Brendan just walked out of the bathroom without another word…
After another few minutes, Brendan and the rest of the crowd went back to the seats of the Pokemon Contest. The first people who were going to battle were Shannon vs. Dylan. When all of the men saw Shannon, they laughed at her name. All the women didn't understand what was so funny, but some of the men where yelling at her to control her Negro problem (even though it wasn't the Shannon from the video). The girl had a Chimeco, and Dylan had a Scyther. Brendan pulled out his Pokedex for this one.
"Scyther, the Mantis Pokemon. Scyther is blindingly fast. Its blazing speed enhances the effectiveness of the twin scythes on its forearms. This Pokemon's scythes are so effective, they can slice though thick logs in one wicked stroke," The Pokedex said. Brendan nodded, and then pointed to put his Pokedex up in his pocket…
Dylan won, and he was heading to the finals. Then it was May and Drew who were going at it afterwards. The winner would go to the finals, but it would be interesting to see who would win. Brendan looked at his PokeGear, and saw that it was 2:55! He ran down to May to tell her that he had to go.
"You do," she asked. He showed her his PokeGear. "Oh, well, good luck in your Battle Tent," she said while hugging him. Everyone in the arena gave an "Aww," at the two. They didn't even abruptly let go this time.
"Excuse me young man," Nurse Joy asked from the judges table. "Who are you, and what are you doing down here?"
"This is my friend," Brendan answered. "And I'm just telling her that I'm going to the Battle Tent next door." He answered.
"Son, that doesn't start until the Contest is over," one of the men said.
"Oh," Brendan said while blushing and going up to the stands. When he got back to his seat, some guy elbowed Brendan.
"You banging her kid," he asked.
"You know it," Brendan answered. May and Drew had their face off, and the winner would go to the finals
"Go Swellow," May yelled during the middle of the match between her and Drew. "Use Whirlwind," she shouted. Swellow started flapping its wings the fastest it could. Roselia was trying to hold it, but it looked like it was almost out.
"Roselia, use Toxic, but point your right arm northeast," Drew yelled. Roselia pointed its arm up into the air, and faced the crowd, then shot some purple stuff out of its arms. It flew to the crowd, and then the wind shot right into Swellow's eyes. The Swellow pushed the wind even harder, and then Roselia went back into Drew's Pokeball due to Whirlwind's effect. Then Swellow fell onto the ground but still on its feet.
"Roselia was returned due to May's attack, but Drew had a nice plan to infect Swellow while the wind was blowing. They both lose all their points, so we'll turn to the judges to see what they think." Vivian said. The three judge's heads huddled together, then after about 45 seconds, they faced the audience. The judge at Brendan's left pressed a button, and then May's head appeared on his screen. The audience clapped. The middle judge pressed a button, and Drew's head appeared on his screen. After the audience's clapping again, they turned to Nurse Joy, and her screen appeared as…
Brendan and May were walking next door to the Battle Tent, and May was clinging onto Brendan's shoulders in agony.
"I trained so hard with my Swellow," she said. And that bastard judge put Drew's face on the damn screen." She cried. Then she looked up to Brendan. "Hey Brendan," she asked.
"Yeah," he answered as they walked inside the odd red, white, and blue tented shape building with a very weird blue and white Pokeball symbol surrounded by three little blue balls.
"Win this Battle Tent," she said. "Please have at least one of us win here in Slateport today," May said while wiping a tear.
"Alright May," he said. They entered the building and looked at the woman at the front desk.
"Are you here for today's Battle Tent appearance," she asked.
"Well, I'm competing, and she's watching," Brendan answered.
"Well then," the front desk woman said while pointing to a door. "Competers go to the door that says "Battle Competers," she said while pointing to the door with the sign in big blue letters. "And the audience goes to the up the stairs." She said while pointing to the stairs.
"Oh, well, may I head upstairs," May asked.
"Well, looking at the local news," she said while looking up at the television set on the wall. "The finals of the Pokemon Contest is still going, so uh…yeah sure go ahead," she said while shrugging her shoulders. May turned around, and headed upstairs. The woman then looked over to Brendan, and grinned.
"I saw your little girlfriend lose the contest," she said. "Sucks to be her huh?" she asked while laughing afterward. She laughed but then noticed that Brendan stared at her dully.
"You know, had this been two weeks ago, I probably would have laughed with you," he said. "But, something inside is telling me that you're a stupid bitch, and no wonder your boyfriend left you to run in his birthday suit in the woods." Brendan said while walking in the Battle Competers door. He closed the door hearing the girl starting to cry…
It was another 15 minutes until the Battle Tent arena started to fill. The other competers came in the room Brendan was in, and they waited to start the Battle Tent just like Brendan was. Ten minutes later, the arena was filled, and they were about to start the battle(s).
"Alright kids," a man said while pulling out a bunch of Pokeballs on a stand. "Pick three of these Pokeballs, and if you win a match, you can chose one of your opponents Pokemon," he said while smiling.
"Uh…can't I just use my own damn Pokemon?" Brendan asked.
"No cursing here young man, this is a family building," he said while smiling at Brendan with his eyes closed.
"Uh…can't I just use my own damn Pokemon?" Brendan repeated.
"Listen kid," he said. "You and your damn competition chose three of these Pokemon, and either compete with them, or shove them up your ass. Pick one!" he yelled to Brendan. Brendan just stared at this fool for another few seconds, then picked three of them.
"That's what I thought, he said while turning around, but when he did, Brendan shoved a Pokeball up his ass!
"How about I shove these balls in you ass, but I'm sure you've had bigger than any Pokeball enlarged!" Brendan said while pushing the button to enlarge it. The man screamed, and then fell onto the ground with an enlarged Pokeball up his ass. Brendan picked up the other Pokeballs, then another one from the stands.
"Good luck crapping that one out," Brendan said. All of the other trainers just stared at Brendan in awe. "Eww, I'm washing my hands," Brendan thought…
Brendan didn't know much about his other Pokemon, but one of them that he chose kicked ass so much. Brendan picked some odd Pokemon called Primate (all noted Pokemon Pokedex entries of the Pokemon he saw at the end of Chapter). He won one battle with Primate alone, then decided to chose his opponents Pelipper. After that, he won with the same Primate, beating his opponents four Pokemon, and he chose their Alakazam (a kickass Pokemon).
"Yeah," Brendan said while holding up Alakazam's Pokeball. "I am on a roll," he said while grinning. Afterwards, he beat his opponent with just that Alakazam, and picked his opponents Flaffy. Then the finals came up (kinda rushing here, I'm sorry). Brendan was facing off with some girl named Terra. Terra had long blonde hair, brown eyes, and was wearing light blue jeans, black shoes, and a black wife beater (for some odd reason). Here's a chart on what happened so far (Brendan's Pokemon are always first)…
Alakazam defeated Persian
Alakazam and Amphoros: stalemate
Primate was defeated by Arbok
Cascoon was defeated by Arbok
Farfetche'd defeated Arbok
Farfetche'd and Raichu: Stalemate
Mawile and Ludicolo: Stalemate
And now for the final battle of Brendan/Amber.
Brendan was running out of options here: him and Amber had only one Pokemon left, and Brendan had no clue what it was. He didn't know half of the Pokemon he had was with him. But he knew that he just had to try.
"Pokeball, go," Terra yelled. Out popped a three headed bird thing, Dodrio. Brendan picked a Pokeball himself, and threw it out to the playing field.
"I chose you…whatever," Brendan yelled as he threw the Pokeball. All of a sudden, a yellow blob with webbed feet emerged from the Pokeball.
"Psy I I (it was just gibberish)," The Pokemon said. Brendan turned it around to look at it's face, and saw two eyes, and a big bill. It's arms were on his head.
"Um…" Brendan said after getting his analysis on the Pokemon. "Go Psyduck, use…" he said while looking in his Pokedex to see the moves it could do. "Got it…Psyduck use Fury Swipes," Brendan said. Psyduck just stood there, and cocked it's head to the side.
"Dodrio, use Peck on Psyduck's head," the girl said. The three headed bird Pokemon ran and started pecking the life out of Psyduck.
"Keep going," she said while looking at Brendan. But she wasn't just looking at him, she looked like she loved the guy. "Keep going," she said.
"Stop that," Brendan said. All of a sudden, Psyduck's eyes glowed, and he stood up to glare at the three headed bird. All of a sudden, it lifted it's arms, the birds levitated in the air, and then Psyduck telepathically slammed them against the side of the arena. It looked like it was knocked out.
"Alright," Brendan yelled. "We won…" but while Brendan was prancing around the arena, Dodrio stood up, and glared at Brendan. Then the heads stretched out, they opened their mouths, and these colored energy's came to their mouths. The left head had a red one, the middle one was blue, and the right one had yellow. Brendan noticed this ad tried to have Psyduck move, but the birds launched their attacks. The left one shot a fire attack, the middle one shot and ice attack, and the right one shot electricity. Psyduck would have moved, but it was to busy celebrating with Brendan.
"Move dammit!" Brendan screamed. But all three attacks swirled together, and hit the duck Pokemon with the three terrible blasts. Psyduck slammed to the other side of the arena, badly knocked out. Brendan stared at this scene in absolute shock, but then just returned Psyduck, dropped all 6 of the rented Pokemon, and then slowly walked out of the arena as the crowd rushed to the girl, and congratulated the girl. But what they were to stupid to see was that the girl wanted to go to Brendan, and she was declaring that she didn't intend on winning.
"Let go of me," she said while trying to get to him. "Brendan don't go," she screamed from the crowds applause. Brendan walked past the guys bathroom and saw a bunch of guys surrounded by the door. And the reason they were surrounded by the door was because a guy was moaning in there.
"What's going on," Brendan asked while walking up to them.
"Some guy shoved a Pokeball up a judge's ass, and he's trying to crap it out!" a little boy said. Brendan looked at the door and shook his head before walking off.
"COME ON YOU DAMN POKEBALL, GET OUT OF MY ASS!" he screamed as the kids were laughing silently, and Brendan walked out with his head hung low…
Later on that evening, May and Brendan walked out of the Battle Tent, both of them with their heads hung low, and devastated. Neither of them said a word as they made their way to the local Pokemon Center. But May decided to speak up.
"Gosh, today was rough," she said as they turned a corner.
"Yeah, Dr. Phil came…" Brendan said.
"And we lost the events that we came here for," May said.
"I got the mess beat out of me," Brendan said.
"You were almost killed," May said.
"By a damn AK," Brendan said.
"Drew's gay," May said.
"And that girl who beat me is coming," Brendan said as they heard footsteps running to the two.
"Brendan…wait," she yelled in between breaths. Brendan and May stopped and looked at the girl coming to them. When she finally caught up, she put down her big trophy full of Poke Dollars inside, and she was holding a gray and light blue egg in her hands.
"You forgot to take this prize," Terra said while handing Brendan the odd colored egg. He stared at it for a minute, then took it with an emotionless face expression.
"Thanks," he said while putting the egg in his bag to keep it warm.
"And I wanted to give you the prize money I won, 50,000P," she said while dumping out the contents of the trophy to revel a bunch of dollars wrapped in thick rubber bands. All of the money had Lance's face on it, the 1000P bill. And there were 10 bills in each band, and 5 bands of money came out of the thing. Brendan picked up a band of money, and then threw it to the ground.
"Keep it," he said while starting to walk away.
"Brendan wait…" she said while grabbing his shoulders. "I…please take the money. It'll make me feel better…"
"I'd feel better if I had won," Brendan said. "But your trophy has your name on it, so take the damn money," he said. Terra picked up her trophy, then looked as though she'd walk away.
"I didn't command Dudrio to do that finisher attack know," she said while looking at him. But Brendan's back was facing her still. "I only told it to attack your Pokemon's head because I knew that Psyduck's psychic abilities would kick in," she said. Brendan just shook her head, and the girl walked away. "I'm sorry," she said while getting out of sight. Brendan just stood as she was for a bit, and May looked at Brendan in worry.
"Is she gone," Brendan asked silently.
"Yeah, I can't see her anymore, why," May asked. Brendan turned around, and started picking up the money while grinning. He handed two of the bands of cash to May, and took the other three. He grabbed one of his three, took off the band, and gave May five of the bills, and he took the other 5, and walleted them.
"There you go, half and half," he said while grinning and bagging the money beside his new Pokemon egg. May looked at Brendan.
"Are you serious," she said while smiling.
"Damn right, I worked hard in that tent, and you worked hard in that contest. I ain't letting our losses go without prizes. And bullshit if I do," he said while closing his bag, and standing up. May looked at Brendan while smiling.
"Thank you," she said.
"No problem, now lets go to the center," Brendan said as they ran to the Pokemon Centre…
Terra walked 1 block from Brendan, then realized that he was beside a girl before. She rushed back to wear Brendan and the girl was, and saw that other than the two kids, the money was gone as well.
"That bitch," she said. "She took the money I gave to Brendan…I'm gonna kick her ass," she said while glaring at the road…
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Arbok, the Cobra Pokemon. This Pokemon is terrifically strong in order to constrict things with its body. It can even flatten steel oil drums. Once Arbok wraps its body around its foe, escaping its crunching embrace is impossible.
Raichu, the Mouse Pokemon. This Pokemon exudes a weak electrical charge from all over its body that makes it take on a slight glow in darkness. Raichu searches for electricity by planting its tail in the ground.
Alakazam, the Psi Pokemon. Alakazam brain continually grows, infinitely multiplying brain cells. This amazing brain gives this Pokemon an astoundingly high IQ of 5,000. It has a thorough memory of everything that has occurred in the world.
Psyduck, the Duck Pokemon. If it uses its mysterious power, Psyduck can't remember having done so. It apparently can't form a memory of such an event because it goes into an altered state that is much like deep sleep.
Primape, the Pig Monkey Pokemon. When Primape becomes furious, its blood circulation is boosted. In turn, its muscles are made even stronger. However, it also becomes much less intelligent at the same time.
Pelipper, the Water Bird Pokemon. Pelipper searches for food while in flight by skimming the wave tops. This Pokemon dips its large bill in the sea to scoop up food, then swallows everything in one big gulp.
Ludicolo, the Jolly Pokemon. Upon hearing an upbeat and cheerful rhythm, the cells in Ludicolo's body become very energetic and active. Even in battle, this Pokemon will exhibit an amazing amount of power.
Ampharos, the Light Pokemon. Ampharos gives off so much light that it can be seen even from space. People in the old days used the light of this Pokemon to send signals back and forth with others far away.
Mawile, the Deceiver Pokemon. Don't be taken in by this Pokemon's cute face - it's very dangerous. Mawile fools the foe into letting down its guard, and then chomps down with its massive jaws. The steel jaws are really horns that have been transformed.
Dudrio, the Triple Bird Pokemon. Apparently, the heads aren't the only parts of the body that DODRIO has three of. It has three sets of hearts and lungs as well, so it is capable of running long distances without rest.
Farfetche'd, the Wild Duck Pokemon. Farfetche'd is always seen with a stick from some plant of some sort. Apparently, there are good sticks, and bad sticks. This Pokemon has been known to fight with others over sticks.
Another Chapter folks. I hope you liked it, and I hope you guys know by now that this Brendan/May adventure story is a whole lot different than any other one on this website. And if you don't believe me, go check them out and see for yourself. Please review, I turned on the anonyms reviews again for the people who don't have accounts, but love to read stories (everyone's done it at least once, don't lie).