Chapter XX: Vegas in Mauville City
Brendan and May walked through this gigantic city of Mauville, and while walking, they spotted a little house, in the middle of downtown. "Who'd build a house that's in the middle of a city," Brendan asked.
"Stupid people, people who need lives, nudist…" May said.
"Nudist women are awesome!" Brendan said while running to the house. May just shook her head as Brendan absent mindedly ran to the house up ahead, but she followed him too. When they arrived at the house, Brendan ran inside grinning.
"Oh hot nudist ladies," he shouted. "Where are youuuu?" he shouted again while looking around the house.
"Sorry young man," a man said while walking up to Brendan. "But the nudist ladies left here just 5 minutes ago, and they won't be back here until next week," he said.
"Aww…" Brendan said as May walked into the door.
"But here, entertain yourself with this," the man said while handing Brendan a brown CD.
"Is it a nudist girl DVD?" Brendan asked excitedly.
"Of course not," the man said while smiling. "It's HM06; Rock Smash." He said. "Your Pokemon will have the ability to smash huge rocks!" he said.
"Uh…the name is self explanatory you idiot," May said.
"Yes well," the man said. "But, after the retarded gym leader Watson gives you a Dynamo Badge, then you can use it." he said.
"What do you mean a retarded gym leader," May asked.
"Yeah, he's retarded," the man said. "Well, not really, but the people of this city says that he should because he gives people badges, even if they aren't trainers," he said.
"Ooh, lets go to the gym, then we can get the hell out of here" Brendan said while bagging the HM and grabbing May's hand. Brendan rushed out the door with May tailing him, and as they went up the road, they saw a bike shop. Outside the shop, was a black man wearing a button up, long sleeve dark green shirt, black jeans, wearing sunglasses, and had a hat that said "San Andreas," on it. He was smoking a cigar, and he was moving his head back and forth, like he was high or something.
"Who's that guy," May asked while Brendan let go of her hand.
"I donno, but whoever he is, he looks like a gang banger," Brendan said. Growing some balls, Brendan walked up to the man. "Um…excuse me," Brendan said. "The man pulled out a 9mm, and pointed it to Brendan's forehead.
"Balla?" he asked while Brendan stood back.
"No, Brendan," Brendan said. The guy still had the gun to him, but then just put it back after another few seconds.
"Yi, yi, yeah," he said while opening the door. "Come on in to my shop, Ryder's Bitchin Bike Shop," he said as Brendan walked in. Then he turned to May.
"May, aren't you coming," Brendan asked while looking at her.
"Ah…no, no you go ahead," May while closing her eyes and smiling, as she was afraid to get killed or something.
"Suit cho'self," the man named Ryder said. "But this place can get pretty ghetto, and you in the middle of the road where drive-by's be goin on, know what I'm sayin," he said. "So stay out there if you want, you die, your boyfriend tried to help," he said as he and Brendan went inside. May looked around for a second, and then moved to the door of the shop slowly. As soon as she touched the doorknob, nearby shooting could be heard, and May ran inside the shop. When she slammed the door, Brendan and Ryder were standing in front of it, grinning to her.
"I told you she'd come inside of fear," Brendan said while turning around.
"Yi, yi, yeah," Ryder said as May blushed.
"I didn't come in here of fear, I just wanted to see some bikes," May said.
"There are some bikes outside for people to look at," Ryder said. May blushed even more, but then shook it off, and glared at Ryder.
"Well I didn't see them," May screamed at him.
"Then maybe you need these sunglasses, you blind piece of shit," Ryder said. Brendan burst out laughing, and May blushed once again. "Anyway, lemme show you around my supermarketitral palace," he said.
"That's not even a word," May said.
"Hey, hey you bitch," Ryder said. Then he paused for a minute, and kept the same look on his face. "Shut the hell up," he said while turning around.
"Why don't you…" May started.
"I'm gangsta homie," Ryder said. After Brendan stopped laughing from his quick interruption, Ryder showed them around the store. Brendan saw a bunch of cool bikes that he liked, but then when he saw the price…
"One million Poke?" Brendan and May asked in unison.
"Well, a playa's gotta make money somehow," Ryder said.
"But who'd purchase these things?" Brendan asked, still overwhelmed with shock.
"Stupid people, people with lives, nudist…" he said.
"Nevermind," Brendan said while looking around the shop some more. After another few minutes of store looking, Ryder looked at the two coolly.
"Aight yall," he said. "Yall wanna see the jackpot," he asked while grinning.
"What's the jackpot," Brendan asked.
"Well, follow me," he said while going to the backroom. May and Brendan followed him, and saw that two bikes were gleaming in the spotlight, literally. But both of the bikes were absolutely beautiful. One of the bikes looked like a blue racing bike; the handles were curved, the seat was high, and it looked like a speed demon. The other one was a normal bike, and it was orange. The handles were straight, and it also had a bell to it.
"Aight now see here," he said while walking to the blue bike. "This here is the Mach Bike," he said. "But I call it 'Bitchin Fast Bike,'" he said while walking around it. "Because it's 'fast as a bitch,'" he said while following up with a laugh. Then he walked over to the orange bike. "But this other bike here is an Acro Bike," he said. "Or as I call it 'Bitchin Trick Bike,'" he said while putting his hand on the seat. "It don't go as fast as that bike right dare," he said while pointing to the Mach Bike. "But this bike can do tricks, like the bunny hop, kickass wheelies, ride rails; you can even ride on the walls…" he said.
"Then it's settled, I want the Acro Bike," Brendan said while going on it.
"Yeah, and I like this Mach Bike," May said.
"Aight then, y'all got Ten Million Poke?" he asked.
"10 MILLION POKE?" May and Brendan asked in unison.
"Damn right," Ryder said. "Five Million Poke each. You done think that I wuz gonna have two kickass bikes just be one million like my other boring bikes did you," he asked.
"Oh come on," Brendan said. "That's just plain retarded," he said.
"I know, I want to go fast on something," May said.
"Gimme 10 Million Poke, then you can have them bikes," Ryder said. Brendan shook his head miserably, and got off the bike.
"Come on May," Brendan said. "Let's get out of this rip off's store," he said.
"No wait a second," May said silently angered. She hoped off of the Mach Bike, and grabbed Ryder by the collar…
"Thanks for the 500,000 Poke that you gave me and Brendan Mr. Ryder," May said.
"Yeah, and these cool new bikes," Brendan said while smiling. Brendan and May laughed as they rode their new bikes away, and Ryder was on the ground holding his balls, and whimpering.
"Shit…" Ryder said. May and Brendan rode their bikes down the street some more (May being ahead of Brendan, he bike goes very fast) and they saw a humongous purple building while heading to the gym.
"Maybe that's the gym," Brendan said while riding on the side of the wall to the entrance. They looked at the sign on the side of the building, and it said "Mauville Gambling Corner."
"Mauville Gambling Corner," May asked while stuffing her bike into her fanny pack (hey, it's a bottomless fanny pack).
"Cool, I love that show, Las Vegas," Brendan said.
"What's a Las Vegas," May asked while looking at Brendan stupidly.
"I donno, but I think that's another name for toilet," Brendan said while stuffing his bike into his book bag. "But I have heard of a Las Venturas!" Brendan said. "So let's go gamble," he said while dragging May into the gigantic building. When they got inside, they were exposed to a whole lot of slot machines, horse racing machines, a few poker tables, and another few black jack tables.
"Woah," May said while eyeing the slot machines. "What kind of place is this," she asked.
"It's Mauville Gambling Corner," a woman said at the entrance desk on their right.
"Mauville Gambling Corner?" May asked. "Hey…I thought it was Mauville GameCorner," May said while looking at the woman suspiciously.
"It was, but we figured that parents need to stop bringing their bratty ass kids to this place so we could gamble properly." She said. "Those brats thought it was a Chucky E. Cheeses or something. So we changed the GAME to GAMBLING, and we knew that the parents would act like irrational Americans, and not come here with their children," she said.
"So you could have the parents hire a baby sitter, have them come over here, and gamble away their money," Brendan said. "So no bratty ass kids, and a raise in your paycheck; everybody wins!" Brendan said.
"Exactly," the woman said. "Tell you what; I'll give you two these nice little Coin Cases, and you can go gamble for coins over there," she said. "All you have to do is put 50P in one of those Slot Machines, and if you get identical three patterns, you win some coins," she said.
"What about the horse racing ones," May asked.
"That one's different; see you put any amount of cash in that machine for the race. You pick a horse you think will win, and if it comes out on top, you get doubled the amount of cash you put in." she said.
"And if we lose?" May asked.
"Pss…we lose cash stupid," Brendan said. "What about those tables," Brendan asked.
"Poker, Texas Hold'em, Black Jack…damn Brendan don't you know anything?" May asked.
"Correct little girl," the woman said while handing May and Brendan the coin case. "Now, if you two win at least 1000 or more coins, just go to that front desk over there for a prize. Go check them out," the woman said. Brendan was about to jet over there, but May grabbed his collar and glared at the woman.
"Hold up," she said. "We're little kids, we're 11 at the matter," May said. "Why let US in?" she asked.
"Well, the second alternative is I call security…" the woman said.
"We'll take the first," Brendan said while freeing himself from May's grasp and running up to the prize desk to check them out. May walked away slowly while keeping her eyes on the woman.
"Sniveling bitch," May said while walking up to the prize counter. She looked at all the prizes, and saw a little list of them…
Mauville Game Corner Rewards:
TM32 (Double Team): 1500 Coins
TM29 (Psychic): 3500 Coins
TM35 (Flamethrower): 4000 Coins
TM24 (Thunderbolt): 4000 Coins
TM13 (Ice Beam): 4000 Coins
Treecko Doll: 1000 Coins
Torchic Doll: 1000 Coins
Mudkip Doll: 1000 Coins
"Oh my Kyogre," May said while eyeing the Torchic Doll. "Oh my gosh, the Torchic doll looks so cute!" May squealed while eyeing the Torchic doll (obviously).
"Cool; you can win TM13 here?" Brendan asked. "I can teach it to Muddy, and then he'll kick even more ass with Ice Beam!" he said excitedly.
"Brendan, what about TM32, Double Team," May asked. "Power isn't the only thing about battling you know," she said.
"Well then, I guess I'll have to gain some coins!" Brendan said while jetting to a Slot Machine, putting 50P inside, and started to play away. May looked at Brendan oddly, and then shrugged her shoulders.
"Ah what the hell," she said while going to the machine in front of Brendan's…
After a few hours of sitting on the Slot Machine, Brendan came out with only 1996 Coins, and May got 2004. The two were addicted to that game, but then they decided to move on over to the tables.
"Let's play some Poker first," May said while grinning.
"Yeah, sure whatever," Brendan said. They made their way over to one of the poker tables, and saw a game end horribly with one guy have a Full house, but the dealer had four of a kind (I only understand poker hand ranks, so just bare with me here).
"Damn man, you suck," Brendan said while stepping up to the seat, and pushing the man who lost out of it. "I think I can whoop your ass in this, Mr. Dealer," Brendan said.
"Vell then little boy," the dealer who had a French accent said. "Let us play…" they went on with their business playing the Poker game, when Brendan ran across four 8's and a Queen.
"Sorry my man," Brendan said while throwing down his cards. "I play a Four of a kind," he said while grinning. The crowd around them went ooh and aah. The man looked up at Brendan sadly.
"Well, I guess everyone can't win a Poker game…" the dealer said.
"HA, I win 8,000 Poke!" Brendan yelled.
"But that doesn't include me…" he said while putting down a Straight Flush of a Queen, Jack, 10, 9, and 8
"AAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWW!" Brendan said as the dealer took away Brendan's 8000 Poke. "Son of a bitch, I'm going to the black jack table!" Brendan said while leaving to the other set of tables. May sat in Brendan's seat and grinned at the French dealer.
"I'm not as stupid as your last guest, so how about I kick your ass the Las Vegas way," May said.
"What, a toilet?" the dealer asked.
"No…it…" May said. "Oh nevermind you gay Frenchman; let's play some Poker!" now this Poker Game was very intense (as I said, I don't know how to play, just card ranks, so imagine a close game of Poker between Dealer and Prey), but as soon as the last cards were drawn, May frowned at her hand. The dealer laid down another Straight Flush of 5, 6, 7, 8, and 9 while grinning miraculously.
"Hmm…looks like another win for me," he said as he reached for the 500,000 Poke of May's.
"Hold it punk," May said while looking at him. "I'd say that a Straight Flush is good," she said while turning her look into a grin. "But I'd also say that a ROYAL Flush is better," she said while laughing and slapping down an Ace, King, Queen, Jack, and a 10. May took her 500,000 Poke back, plus another that the dealer had to lay down. He slapped his head, and then grasped onto his hair as his legs began to shake.
"Comment cette petite fille pourrait-elle me batter (how could this little girl beat me translator)?" he asked while going crazy. May just put all of her money up, and shook her head at the man on the ground going mad. All of a sudden, Brendan shot up from his seat in glee.
"YEAH!" he shouted while holding up some cash, and then some. "Alright, I hit 21! I get 550,000 Poke back, and then some!" he yelled while getting his cash, and putting it up. After Brendan and May celebrated together on their mega money wins, they shifted right back to slot machines. And then after another few hours, Brendan spent his 5500 Coins on a TM13 and a TM32. May spent her 5000 coins on a TM35 and a Torchic Doll. Everybody said goodbye to May and Brendan, as they were the first one's to win the Poker and Blackjack tables. The Frenchman was in the fetal position while sucking his thumb as they left the building. But when they got out, they saw that it was nighttime…
"Um…Jessica," Brendan said while opening his Pokedex. "What time is it?" he asked.
"11:45 p.m." Jessica said.
"Damn, we gotta go to the Pokemon Center quickly…" May said. The two pulled out their new bikes, and May sped down the road as Brendan did a wheelie all down the street…
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Chapter 20 you guys. I hope you guys enjoyed the gambling and games. The fun and jokes were fun, but now it's time to get back to business (but I'll still be funny, don't worry). Next chapter Brendan and Watson will face off in their battle. And yes, Ryder was based off of Ryder from Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. Please Review, and wish me luck with my gay school…