title: love month
prompt: SASUSAKU MONTH ON LJ!
rating: T-M

summary: o20; It was a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare. They saw each other in their sleep. Sakura will do anything to see Sasuke again, and Sasuke can't keep his mind off her.

.o20.
Dreams/Nightmare

Sweet dreams,

Or a beautiful nightmare—

Either way I

Don't wanna wake up from this

Sakura woke up, drenched in sweat. She had the same dream that she always did before, and the song would always play in her dreams as she tried so much not to think about it.

It was always about Sasuke.

There were some good dreams about him, and also some bad. Most of the time they were memories of the genin days, but there were also nightmares about when he went crazy.

Sometimes she would imagine "what ifs?" as in, "What if Sasuke-kun never left me? What if I went with him? What if Itachi never killed anybody…what if I could change everything?"

And then she'd always end up crying until she went back to sleep.

Every night Sasuke's beautiful face would haunt her in her sleep. Seeing the man she loved all the time, even when she couldn't control her thoughts...

Was she having sweet dreams? Or was it simply a beautiful nightmare?

Like Sasuke, it was both.

.

.

.

Sasuke always woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, too. He would always get angry and punch the walls in disgust, feeling as if he couldn't breathe anymore. His dreams were always the same.

They weren't about how he killed so many people. They weren't about Konoha. Hell, they weren't even about Itachi or the massacre.

They were about Sakura.

Seeing her smile in every dream, or seeing her tears fall, and remembering how good the feeling was protecting her…

Pink would always cloud his dreams. When he was awake, he could decide to think about what he wanted to think, but when he was sleeping…he was vulnerable. Cursing himself, he wished he could have been like Gaara—not needing to sleep.

But at the same time, it wasn't like he didn't enjoy it. He enjoyed the dreams very much.

It was just that his heart ached every time he woke up.

.

.

.

Every night was something she looked forward to. Sakura didn't care if it hurt her later or if she cried after she woke up. She just wanted it to happen and would often take multiple sleeping pills to knock herself out.

"Sakura-chan, please stop eating them. I don't think that's healthy and I'm worried," Naruto said, watching as she swallowed another pill. "Plus, you get tired all the time and then fall asleep."

"I'm fine, Naruto," Sakura said as she was waiting for the effects to happen. "I don't need you to mother me."

She knew that she was being a little harsh, but she wanted to fall asleep and dream the day away. Her dreams were the closest she could get to Sasuke and she didn't want anybody to take that time away from her. It was like her own little secret—she met Sasuke in her dreams and was only his for those eight to ten hours.

Sometimes he held her, kissed her, hugged her, cried to her, touched her, killed her, fucked her…

And made love to her.

She imagined that he must have been a harsh lover, but in her dreams, he was gentle with her and caused her no pain at all. She, even as a virgin, could feel him inside of her, wriggling around, but when she woke up, the feeling was gone.

Sakura wanted that feeling again. She wanted Sasuke to hold her as he thrust into her and spilled himself in her.

She fumbled for the bottle and swallowed a fistful.

.

.

.

Sasuke had a bad feeling. For some reason, he felt like Harry Potter—he could see what was going on with Sakura in visions and it would come true.

He dreamed of kissing her softly, embracing her, holding her tight, spilling out his memories and fears to her, crying to her, touching her gently, making sweet love to her…

Sasuke shook his head. He didn't have time to be thinking of that at the moment. Although he very much wanted to go back to sleep, he forced himself to stay awake so that he could control his thoughts about Sakura.

His eyes continued to flutter as he pinched himself repeatedly, cutting and stabbing himself so he would stay awake. Then, he figured, five minutes wouldn't hurt—and laid his head onto a rock, setting his body on the grass.

Through his dreams, he saw Sakura smiling—then angry at Naruto for something. He didn't know what. Sakura then had another peaceful look on her face as she smiled again, and then began to cry uncontrollably. She went home and looked through her drawers—

—reaching for a bottle of white pills, frantically looking for water without success before deciding to swallow a fistful. Soon, she was knocked out onto the ground and had a smile on her face.

She was beautiful, Sasuke thought. But this was a beautiful nightmare.

He woke up abruptly, hoping it wasn't true. Sasuke put his hand over his chest and felt his heart race. Would somebody find her in time? Or would it be too late?

"Sakura," he said quietly, remembering how easily the words flew through his mouth. "Don't do this."

Sasuke now had a reason to stay awake for the rest of the night.

.

.

.

"Sasuke-kun," Sakura moaned as he unzipped her shirt, revealing bandaging to bind her chest from getting in the way. "S-Sasuke-kun –"

"Shh," he said, putting a finger over her lips. "No one will know, sweetheart." He kissed her softly before moving down to her neck, placing multiple hickeys on her skin before unwrapping the bandages with his teeth. Her chest heaved up and down as his teeth finally reached her skin, her nipples aching for his touch.

"You're beautiful," he said, looking at her with admiration. He met her eyes. "You really are beautiful."

"S-Sasuke…"

He kissed her again, before she saw that he was undoing his belt and pulling down his pants.

"Sasuke-kun, wait—"

She felt a harsh punch in her stomach, and woke up to see Naruto, Sai, and Kakashi all in her room, worried. Sakura saw her own vomit on the floor, the pills scattered around her, and the saddened looks of her friends.

"Sakura-chan, why did you…are you…?" Naruto began to cry, holding Sakura close to him. "Sakura-chan, don't do this to me. Don't do this to us. We love you very much and know that you're suffering, but we promise that we'll bring him back—"

"Naruto—" Sakura began. She pushed him away harshly. "Why did you do that? I wasn't going to die! I just—I just wanted…"

Sakura, too, buried her face in her hands and turned away, ashamed. "I just wanted to see him again."

"Sakura-chan…"

.

.

.

Sasuke saw through his vision that somebody had saved her. It was Naruto, but yet, Sakura continued to cry over the hurt. Was she suicidal? So sad that he had left? Sasuke didn't know what she was dreaming about, but nonetheless, he wanted to help her.

"Sakura…" he murmured again, feeling the words flow like river water. "Why are you—"

He sighed again, pinching himself. "Stupid Sasuke. Don't think about women right now. You're a man."

Even while he was awake he couldn't control his thoughts about Sakura. And he hated himself for that.

Deciding it was Suigetsu's turn to keep watch, he went back into his tent, ignoring Karin's shrill cries and Juugo's muttering, along with Suigetsu's whining.

He lied back down on his tatami mat and sighed, holding the pillow to his chest.

"Sakura…" he said once more, his lips wanting to say her name over and over again. Then, he rolled over so that he forced himself not to look at anything but the mat.

"Sweet dreams, Sakura."

But the sleepless Sasuke and the crying Sakura knew that they wouldn't be having any sweet dreams at all.

Instead, their beautiful nightmares haunted them for what seemed like forever.

BEYONCE

Slight changes 7.8.14!