A/N: Warning: A little hanky, no panky.

Chapter 5 – Ambush

As Ianto parked his car, he had to avoid hitting Gwen who was blocking his spot while she climbed into the SUV. Ianto put the car in neutral and gunned the engine. She mimed slowing down even more. He wasn't amused. She finally got in and, with exaggerated slowness, closed the door. He parked and jumped out. Gwen lowered the window and Jack yelled at him from the driver's seat.

"A 999 call last night mentioned a location known for Rift activity. Might be a coincidence, probably nothing. Jump in."

Ianto didn't like the sound of that. He didn't see himself as a field mission kind of guy. Sure, if they were shorthanded or needed something packed and lifted, he was your man. Jack already had Tosh and Gwen. That was plenty to investigate a vague possible problem. Clearly they weren't taking it too seriously or Gwen wouldn't have been wasting time getting into the SUV.

"Are you waiting for me to get out and open the door for you?" Jack sounded mildly annoyed, but then he smirked. "Why Ms. Jones! Your hair looks lovely! I'll get that door for you," Jack said taking off his seatbelt.

"I can manage, sir," Ianto said opening the car door and climbing in the back behind Gwen.

"Did you have fun at the spa," Gwen said laughing. "I swear, if I took a morning off to get my hair done..."

"...it would still only look half as good as mine," Ianto finished. Ianto was not in the mood for these people to ruin his day. It had been going so well.

Tosh giggled and put her hand over her mouth. Even Jack laughed.

"As it happens," Ianto began, "I also went by the tailor and ordered a new suit. Jack, I need to go back for a fitting Friday."

"Can't you buy off the rack," Gwen asked.

"Do you really want to keep feeding me straight lines?" Ianto glared at the back of Gwen's head.

"I'm just saying I've got nice outfits for Rhys down at the Outlets. You could go there after work and get something a lot easier than going to a tailor."

"No offense, Gwen," Jack said pulling the SUV onto the street, "but I've seen how Rhys dresses to take you out on the town. I don't think I want Ianto emulating his style."

"Which reminds me," Gwen said, "you owe me a night off."

"Fine, pick a night. We will only call you if absolutely necessary and no matter how badly I'm injured by a Weevil, I promise to not interrupt your date," Jack said.

"Fine, tomorrow night."

"Done. What about you Tosh? Want a guaranteed Torchwood free night?"

"That's okay. I feel bad about leaving at 6 yesterday."

"Don't feel bad. Everybody lit out early. Well, except Ianto. He was hard at work all night to make up for taking this morning off. I'm guessing it'll be another late night tonight if he's taking Friday morning off."

"Absolutely. Wouldn't dream of doing otherwise. And it's Friday lunch time actually," Ianto said.

"Noted. We are on our own for lunch Friday, ladies! We should start planning the debauchery now!"

They arrived at the dilapidated house and quickly found rats in the walls, bugs under the carpets, and a small amount of residual Rift energy.

"Gwen, Tosh, you two look around this floor. Ianto, let's check upstairs."

Jack bounded up the stairs. Ianto carefully stepped up the stairs worried they would give way under his weight. The railing shook under his touch. He caught up to Jack in a room at the end of the hall. He looked out the window through an inch of dirt at the neighbor's house with his hands on his hips.

"It would have been mighty loud for the neighbor to hear it from...agh!"

Jack interrupted Ianto's sentence by grabbing him from behind. Jack grabbed Ianto's right nipple with his left hand and gripped Ianto's right hip with his right hand. He pulled Ianto flush against him.

"God, you look good," Jack growled against Ianto's ear grinding his hips.

"You don't have to call me God," Ianto said mimicking Jack. Ianto moaned as Jack's tongue connected with his newly shaved neckline. "I was thinking about that for hours." Jack's left hand massaged Ianto's chest. His right hand crept unto Ianto's crotch.

"I can tell. Zero to diamond cutter in two seconds. When we get back to base, I'm going to fuck your brains out," Jack growled.

Ianto twisted around and grabbed Jack's face. He kissed him hard and shoved his tongue against Jack's mouth until it opened. Jack pushed forward with his tongue. Ianto, refusing to take a subordinate role, sucked Jack's tongue. He lightly bit Jack and they broke apart gasping for air.

"I'm not the only one getting a little excited," Ianto said fondling Jack's erection through his trousers. Jack groaned then let go and took a few steps back from Ianto.

"Okay, we've got to get some control. I don't want Tosh and Gwen coming up here and catching us." Jack shook himself. "You are so getting it when we get home!"

"I'll meet you in the Archives, D room." Jack leered and nodded.

They looked in the various rooms and found nothing. After a quick clothing check and adjustment, they went back downstairs.

"Find anything," Jack asked casually. Ianto looked at him enviously. He looked perfect – no flushing, not a hair out of place – back to his usual perfect self as if someone had waved a magic wand. He, on the other hand, felt like he was wearing a sandwich board announcing he groped his boss on one side and "I really liked it" on the other. He noted that in spite of the warmth, Jack kept his overcoat closed. Ianto counted it as a minor victory.

"This...thing is covered in Rift energy," Tosh said gesturing to a metal cylindrical object. It was only five inches high and 3 inches in diameter. It was closed on one end, but open at the other. Random looking patterns were cut out of the metal. Inside the cylinder was a tie-dyed colored psychedelic candle that was about 8 inches tall or at least what was left of it was. Globs of melted wax had dripped down the side and fused the candle and makeshift holder into a single unit.

"Alien bric-a-brac," Ianto said underwhelmed.

"Is it the candle or the candle holder," Gwen asked eyeing it suspiciously.

"The holder, but we should take the candle, too," Tosh answered.

"I didn't think acid trip décor was your style," Jack said. Tosh smiled.

"Not even close, but it looks like that candle holder is bleeding energy into the candle. Besides, Owen will like it." They all nodded.

"It looks to me like some kids have been using this as a hangout," Gwen offered. "Beer bottles, cigarette butts – they must have been having a party when the police showed up and the kids ran."

"Could be," Jack said. "Okay, Ianto, bag up the knick-knack. Careful you don't get too close to the wick."

"Sir," Ianto asked not understanding.

"With your new haircut, you're so hot you'll ignite it!" Jack threw him a quick glance and a wink. He ruffled his hair as he walked by and into the next room. Tosh giggled. Gwen hurried after him.

"Careful you don't get burned, sir," Ianto called after him playfully.

"Jack," Ianto heard Gwen say on the other side of the paper thin wall, "I think you do need to be careful. I think Ianto is starting to take your joking seriously."

Tosh looked up from the object to Ianto. He put a finger to his lips and crept to the doorway.

"Joking? You mean my flirting?" Ianto could hear the smile on Jack's face.

"Whatever you want to call it," Gwen said in a conspiratorial tone that seemed louder than her previous voice. "What would you do if he suddenly threw himself at you?"

"Think Christmas came early?" Tosh put her hand over her mouth to keep from laughing. Ianto moved a little closer.

"That's exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about! It's cruel to lead him on like that."

Ianto looked at Tosh and mouthed the word 'cruel' and shrugged. She shrugged back and shook her head.

"I was talking to Owen," Gwen continued, "and we think Ianto has developed a, well, a crush on you."

Ianto wasn't laughing at that. He thought he'd been very discreet.

"What makes you say that," Jack asked. His curiosity was palpable to Ianto. He was eagerly awaiting the answer as well.

"He always tries to sit next to you in briefings. He gathers up our paperwork so he has an excuse to visit you. Owen caught him staring at you walking across the Plass on CCTV. Do you know what he said? He said he was admiring your coat."

"Ianto does love this coat. Sometimes I think it's the only thing that keeps him working for Torchwood."

"Jack..."

"Gwen," Jack interrupted, "Ianto sits next to me and takes the reports because he manages the paper flow and he always knows what I'll need before I know I need it. He's probably the most efficient employee Torchwood has ever had." There was a pause before Jack continued. "And I think I covered the coat. It's a little unusual, but as long he's happy and keeps it scotch guarded I can live with his little kink. A few years back we had an operative who thought it was hot to have sex on the invisible lift. He did a good job so what could anybody say?"

"They could say 'Jack, put your clothes back on'," Ianto said entering the room. Gwen jumped back. Jack smirked. "Are you telling ribald tales without me and Tosh? You know how we look forward to story hour, sir."

"Gwen and I were just chit chatting," Jack said.

"Bric-a-brac, knick knack, chit chat – I'm getting a Suessical vibe from this mission," Ianto said. "Speaking of the mission, what was the 999 call about?"

"Someone reported a loud noise," Gwen said slightly redder than normal. "My theory is kids from next door party in this abandoned wreck. The Rift spits that thing out and they decide to use it. Then the cops show up and the kids run." Nobody commented. "Any better ideas?"

"It's a lot of melted wax. I'd say it was burning at least 12 hours," Jack said. "It doesn't look like it would be very noisy."

"Maybe something else came through that was noisier," Ianto offered.

"Or maybe this thing isn't just decorative, but functional. When you turn it on it gets noisy," Tosh supplied joining them.

"That's exactly what I've always said about Ianto," Jack joked. Ianto closed his eyes and shook his head. Gwen's eyes bulged. Tosh just laughed.

"We should probably get going before I change my mind about going back and working in the Archives. I feel a sick day coming on," Ianto said glaring at Jack.

"Right, pack up and let's go," Jack said quickly exiting the house.

Ianto returned to the room with the candle holder. Tosh had wrapped it and placed it in a black case. He picked it up and was about to leave when he spied a cigarette lighter on the table where they had found the alien object. He picked it up and, feeling a little thrill similar to the one he felt when he had been a teenage shoplifter, put it in his pocket.

Maybe I do still have a little criminal in me, Ianto thought as he joined the team outside.