Author's Notes:
Shoutout to Sareface, shiftyless, and The Hollow Inside for the reviews!
I'm sorry this took so long to get to you. I've been dealing with moving, camp, and just general RL messiness. However, I've come up with a much better way of drafting these letters, so you should be seeing them more frequently now (I hope).
Reviews are always welcomed. Thanks to Heather for the beta.
Chapter Summary: We must, regrettably, inform you that your prank has failed. We are smarter than that.
Dearest "Harry,"
We – that is, the Marauders: Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs – must confess ourselves astonished that you were able to remember these events, most of which occurred when you were not present. Those at which you were present still occurred while you were little more than a year old. That kind of memory is an impressive feat; did you use a Pensieve or are you simply a genius?
Unfortunately, there are some portions of your account that we find suspect. Most egregious are the errors in characterization. Mister Moony has kindly pointed out that Professor McGonagall holds no love for dear James, while Hagrid likely doesn't know of Lily's existence. I, Mister Prongs, find it difficult to believe that Lily Evans could have such a horrible sister. Even harder to believe is the idea that Lily would consent to marry me – er, James.
Furthermore, as Mister Wormtail has reminded us, most babies are not possessed of the kind of magic required to defeat a dark wizard so horrendously powerful that no one dares speak his name. While Mister Moony holds that it is possible Voldemort might have lost his nerve when faced with murdering a toddler, we all agree that losing his power is a bit much.
Taking all of this into account, we must, regrettably, inform you that your prank has failed. We are smarter than that.
Sincerely,
Mister Prongs
Mister Moony
Mister Wormtail
Mister Padfoot
P.S. Unless your prank was to convince Mister Padfoot that he ought to buy a Muggle motorcycle and enchant it to fly, in which case you have indeed succeeded. It took the rest of us ten minutes to calm him down enough to sign this letter.