I walked down the darkened hallway in search of my nephew. My eyes began adjusting to the darkness and I soon heard muffled cries coming from the living room. As I stumbled into the living room, I found James curled up on the couch wrapped in his Haley's sweater. The tears streaming down his face caused my heart to break. I knew he missed his mom. James probably missed her more than I did.

"Hey buddy." I said as I began to see him more clearly.

I received no response. Maybe he was mad at me too. I walked closer to the couch and could now see him perfectly. He had Nathan's CD player with him. It wasn't on but he had the headphones over his head. His eyes were closed and he pretended like he heard music. I sat down next to him and his eyes immediately opened.

"Unkie Luke is pass tyour bedtime."

"Isn't it past your bedtime too?"

"Yeah."

"Then why aren't you in bed?"

"I wann lisen to mommy."

"Why don't you give me the CD player and I can put it on for you?"

"Otay." He said as he handed me the CD player. I opened it and made sure that a CD was already inside. Inside was a burned disk that read HALEY'S GOOD NIGHT TO YOU. I closed the lid and turned it on. I handed the headphones to James. He eagerly took one and he handed me the other. I shook my head and he climbed onto my lap and put the ear piece in my ear. He lay on my chest as we began listening to Haley talk.

"Hey Baby James. It's mommy. Did you have a bad dream baby?...Yeah. I'm so sorry baby. Let mommy sing to you….Wait let me guess. Uncle Luke is with you. Yeah I figured he would be. You know, Uncle Luke is my favorite person in the whole world. If you ever have a problem, Uncle Luke can help you. I promise. Now close your eyes and listen to mommy and remember this is a secret."

Her words were so kind and so earnest. I could feel the tears well up in my eyes when she spoke. I missed her so much and hearing her say that I was her favorite person, it just made me sadder. I would be there for James, just like she promised. I would never let either of them down. When she began to sing, I knew why she wanted it to be a secret. It was her song 'When the Stars Go Blue' with Chris Keller. Nathan hated this song. It reminded him of the bad times in their relationship. I wonder what Nathan would think if he knew that I almost slept with Chris Keller.

I looked down during the song and discovered that James had fallen asleep during the song. I picked him and walked to the spare bedroom. I guess it's his room now. I look around and see his belongings everywhere. Yeah, this is his room. I lay him down on his bed and slowly back away. I never took my eyes off of him. I closed the door and left it open just a crack. Then I returned to my room…well our room. At least I hope it could be our room – mine and Nathan's.

I walked back into the bedroom and saw that the light was still on. I hesitantly pushed the door open and saw Nathan's eyes fixed up the door, like he was waiting for me to come back.

"Hey you." I said with a hint of sexiness in my voice.

"Hey back. How is he?"

"He's asleep. He just missed his mom."

"Thanks for taking care of him Luke. I don't know if I could have handled it."

I turned and looked at him and saw the pain in his eyes. I sat on the bed next to him and began tracing my name on his abs.

"We can do this Nate. We can make this work."

"I know. I just want James to be happy. He deserves it."

"So do you. I will do whatever it takes to make you both happy."

"Why? Why are you so willing to put me first?"

"Because, I love you Nate." I confessed while staring into his eyes.

"I love you too Luke. Being with you makes me so happy. I love your smile, and your laugh. I love watching you sleep, and I love holding you in my arms. I love everything about you."

Hearing that I could say anything. I stared up at him and I could feel my heart skip a beat. 'Have I found the person I am supposed to be with?'

"Lucas, say something."

"Umm…I love you too Nate…with all of my heart."

He leaned in and our lips touched. Softer than ever before and just as gentle as I could expect. Our lips molded perfectly together and I took this as a sign that we were meant to be together.

Nathan slowly pulled away and stared deep into my eyes. Our breathing was labored and coming in spurts.

"Would you do something for me Nate?" I breathed.

"Anything baby." He responded.

"Make love to me. Softly…and passion…atley." I said between chaste kisses.

"If that's what you want."

"Of course. I want you to be my first. My one and only."

"Okay. Just promise me that you'll tell me if I hurt you."

"Promise." I said as I molded my body into his. I heard him pull a condom from the drawer which was finally followed by the tearing of the aluminum packaging.

"Are you ready baby?"

"Of course, Nathan. Just go slow." I said while lying on my back.

"Absolutely." I said as I felt him begin entering me.

I inhaled sharply and put my hand on his chest. I could feel him begin pulling out and I shook my head at him.

"No. Just go slow."

"Okay." He replied as he pushed me further inside me. I soon began relaxing and could feel all of him inside me. The pressure was painful but well worth it.

"Thank you." I told him as I stared up at his gorgeous blue eyes.

"Anything for you."

He began pulling out and the pressure began subsiding. The only problem with that was now I wanted him inside me again. I bit my bottom lip and glared at him, letting him know that I wanted him.

He leaned closer and positions his lips close to mine. I lifted my head and met his lips for a quick kiss. Again he leaned closer and this time he began whispering in my ear.

"Tell me you want me, Luke. I need to hear it baby."

"I want you Nathan. All of you inside me. Please."

"You want it."

"Yes."

"Good." He said as he thrust every inch of him inside me. My moans were filled with lust as I bucked against him. My breathing became labored and my eyes felt like they were glued shut but I didn't care. I matched my thrusts with his as he led me to a climax like no other.

"Nathan….oh god Nathan….here I come….oh …ohhhhhhh." I shouted.

His grunts told me that he was close as well. As I came I could feel him tighten inside me which was soon followed by a warm feeling. We did it. Finally we had done what I had only dreamed of for years. It was more than I had ever dreamed of and at that point I knew that we could be together.