I want to apologize for the failed British slang. My friend Emily helped me write this…not that I don't take full responsibility for the shit that's about to come out of Arthur's mouth…but it's mostly her fault!

Ivan was lying in bed that morning, even though the meeting was
starting in a couple of minutes. He was having a wonderful dream. He
was running through a field of sunflowers while holding hands with
Lithuania. They danced around and drank vodka together. Toris was
beginning to get drunk and leaned in to kiss Ivan. Ivan closed his
eyes as Toris's lips touched his. Ivan could taste the vodka in his
breath. He wrapped his arms around Toris's waist and began to pull him
closer...

"Ra-Ra-Rasputin! Russia's greatest love machine! It was a shame how he
carried oooooonnnn!"

He picked up his cell phone.

"What the hell do you want, da?" he shouted, "This had better be
fucking important comrade or I will pound your face into dust!"

"Ru...Russia? Help me!"

"Lithuania? What's wrong?" he asked, worried.

"Please...come back home! I need you! I'm...in danger...come...need...save..."

"Lithuania? I can't hear you!"

"...I...van" Russia heard before he lost connection.

"Lithuania? Lithuania! Toris!" he shouted.

Russia hung up and sat down on his bed, burying his face in his hands.

"Toris." he whimpered.

"Ra-Ra-Rasputin!"

"Da?"

"Bloody hell Ivan! Blimey! The fucking meeting started fifteen minutes ago you
git! Where have you been doing you gobshite? Frigging in a cottage? Get
your ass down here you plonker!"

"I'm going back to Russia comrade." he told England while getting dressed.

"Who the hell are you calling comrade you pillock! You're not going
anywhere you helmet!"

Ivan hung up. Damn, that Brit could be annoying! He wanted to teach
him a lesson, but there was no time for that. He had to go save his
precious Lithuania!

"Bollocks! That wanker hung up on me!"

"Whatever, let's just start without him!" said Gilbert, glad he was
getting a day off from Russia.

Ever since he had caught him with Hungary last week, things had been
very awkward. At least they were for Gilbert. He could sense that Ivan was
somehow jealous of him. That made him very uneasy. He tried to keep
her close at all times.

Hungary didn't mind this at all. She welcomed Prussia's clinginess and
possessiveness with open arms. She had never had that with Austria; he
had always been so distant. She just needed to feel loved. She'd stop
him if he went too far.

"We need eight countries you sod!"

"Elizaveta, how would you like to be an honorary G8 member for the
day?" he asked, grabbing his amazing girlfriend by the waist.

"Quoi? We're aloud to invite people to join?"

"Of course we're not, you git!"

"Yay! I'll call Tony!"

"Ve! I'm going to get Romano, maybe he'll play go fish with me!"

"I'll play go fish with you Italy!"

"I'll go get Greece." said Japan, heading towards the door.

"Calm down everyone! Can we please just start the meeting!"

Japan walked back to his seat, looking disappointed.

Russia couldn't stop worrying about Lithuania. He thought about him
for the whole plane ride. What if he didn't get there in time? What if
he couldn't save him.

As the plane landed he realized he didn't even know where Lithuania
was. He had never felt so helpless in his life. The one he loved was
in danger and there was absolutely nothing he could do about it.

"Ruuusssiiiaaa! Over here!"

"Lithuania!" said Ivan, running over to hug him, "You're alright, comrade? What happened?"

"I'm sorry, I lied to you! She made me!"

Oh God. His sister was involved in this. What had she done to Toris? How had she found out about his feelings for the Baltic nation? He had always tried to keep it a secret from her.

"What did she do to you? Are you alright, da? I'm so sorry!"

"No, I'm fine. Well she had a knife against my throat during the phone call…"

Russia was infuriated. How dare she lay a hand on his precious Toris!

"Please Russia! You have to help me! Your sister took Poland!" he pleaded.

Poland?

"Belarus wants to make a trade. You for Poland. I don't want to do this but if something happened to Feliks… I just…" Lithuania explained, trying to hold back tears.

Russia had been so blind! All this time he had been watching Toris, he had never realized Lithuania had feelings for Poland. He couldn't stand watching Toris cry, especially over another man. He didn't want to do this, but he wanted to help the one he loved. It hurt to know that Toris didn't share his feelings, but he couldn't ignore his tears.

"I'll help you comrade. Where do we have to go, da?" Russia told him, trying to act like his usual cheerful self.

"R-really? Oh thank you Russia! I'm sorry, I don't want to do this but Feliks is…he's ...I…"

"I understand. You just want to protect him, da?" Russia said, smiling sadly.

Lithuania nodded and wiped away his tears.

"Lithuania… I think it'd be better for you and Poland if you stopped spending time with me."

"But we're friends!"

Now Russia was the one who felt like crying. Friends. They had been friends. And now he had to end it.

"It's just that my sister can get a little crazy sometimes, da! I wouldn't want you to get hurt."

Lithuania nodded and led Russia to Belarus's hide out.

"This is so, like, totally not cool!" said Poland, who was tied down to a chair.

"Shut up! Can't you just shut up! I've had enough of you! Oh my God you're so annoying! I can't take this!"

"Bella? I'm like so totally hungry right now! Make me a sandwich."

"Don't call me Bella you son of a bitch!"

"Why not, Bella? It's like such a totally cute nickname! But it, like, doesn't really suit you…"

"Onii-san had better get here soon or I swear to God I am going to kill you!"

"Feliks!" Lithuania shouted running towards Poland.

"Onii-san!" Belarus exclaimed, running towards her brother.

"Oh Feliks! I was so worried about you! Are you alright?" Toris said, untying him.

"I missed you Tory." Poland said, blushing.

"…I missed you too." Toris mumbled.

He could feel his face getting red. He grabbed Poland's hand and began to walk away. He turned around to face Russia.

"Thank you." He said, smiling weakly.

Ivan watched as Toris walked away with Feliks. Toris was happy but Ivan was devastated. He collapsed next to his little sister.

"See Onii-san. Other people will only hurt you." She aid patting her brother's head, "That's why you have to stay with me."

Russia flinched. His sister had found the cruelest way possible to let him know that he didn't have a chance with Lithuania.

"You…You planned this?" he asked, backing away from his twisted little sister.

"He was going to hurt you Onii-san! I had to protect you!" Belarus told him.

"I hate you!" he shouted before running away as fast as he could.

He wished that what he had said was true. He wanted to hate his little sister, but he couldn't. Every time he tried to hate her he would remember the poor neglected little girl she was when they were kids. He would remember how he and Ukraine raised their little sister together. He would remember how cute she was when she was a kid. He would remember that deep down, underneath the terror and the revulsion, he really loved his little sister. But not like that.

Ivan was confused, upset and scared. He needed to talk to someone. He ran to the only place that he felt safe.

"Ivan?"

"Please! Let me in Katyusha!"

Ukraine let her younger brother in. He immediately locked the doors and closed the windows.

"I-Ivan? What's wrong?" she asked him.

"She's coming for me! I just can't take this anymore!" he said, sinking down to the floor.

"Aren't you supposed to be in Florida?" his sister asked him, sitting down next to him.

He told her what had happened. He was crying by the end of his story. She pulled him into a hug.

"I'm so sorry Ivan."

"Who's that?" Kumajiro asked, walking into the living room to find his guardian hugging a strange crying man.

"Kumajiro! What are you doing up? You should go back to bed, you're still sick!" She said, running over to check his temperature.

"I didn't know you had a son, da!" Russia said, surprised.

"What? No, it's not like that!"

"Oh! Kolkol, I know you! You're Canada's son!"

"I'm going back to sleep." Kumajiro said rolling his eyes.

Wait wasn't Canada's son at the meeting in Florida yesterday?

"What is he doing here?"

"He got sick so Mathew asked me to take care of him until he got better."

She called him Mathew. Katyusha never used people's human names. They must be really close. He didn't know his sister was friends with Canada. Why hadn't Canada told him this?

"Are you two close, da?"

"Yeah," she said blushing, "We talk on the phone every night. I can't wait for him to come back from his meetings!"

His sister was in love with Mathew! But wasn't Mathew dating that strange frying pan girl? That son of a bitch was cheating on his sister! He was going to teach him a lesson when he got back to the States. Why was he so surprised? The kid was related to America and England, so of course he couldn't be as perfect as he seems.

"I need to get back to Florida, da!"

"I know a way we could sneak you out of the country without Natalya finding out."

"Great! Let's go!"

"…I can't. I have to stay with Kuma-kun."

"Well can't you get a babysitter, da?"

She obviously couldn't call her sister. Ivan had just had a breakdown; this wasn't the time for a family reunion! She didn't know who else she could ask.

Ivan began trying to find a babysitter. He couldn't face Lithuania right now, so he was out of the question. Latvia was still a child himself and besides that he was completely incompetent. He had no idea why he kept that brat around. This only left him with one option. Yeah, he'll do. He's always babysitting Latvia anyway.

"Estonia? I need you to do me a favor, da?"

Ukraine was exhausted. She spent all day taking care of Kumajiro, who was getting worse, because her sister hadn't shown up today. And when she found out what her sister had been up to she wasn't impressed. She spent hours comforting her poor little brother and helping him get out of the country. Then she spent all night working in the fields because she hadn't gotten anything done all day. On top of all this she now owed Estonia money for babysitting all afternoon.

She was about to keel over when she heard her sister banging on the door.

"Is he here? Is Onii-san here? Let me in!"

"I haven't seen him sis." She said, letting her into her house, despite the fact that she was about to black out.

She spent another three hours listening to her little sister's complaints and trying to comfort her.

"He hates me now! I didn't mean to hurt him! I…I just…" she cried.

"I know, Natalya." She told her little sister, hugging her.

"Is ok if I spend the night?" Natalya asked.

Ukraine nodded.

"…Hello…?"

"Oh, you were asleep! I'm sorry Nicky; do you want me to call you back tomorrow?"

"No don't go! I want to hear your voice!"

Mathew was shocked. Nikita wasn't the kind of person who would say things like that. She sounded exhausted. He began to worry about her.

"Did you have a bad day or something?"

"The worst! …Matt?"

"Yes?"

"Can you call me Nikita again? I like it when you call me that."

Mathew blushed. She really wasn't acting like herself. She sounded worn out.

"Can you tell me what happened Nikita?"

"…Belarus kidnapped Poland and Lithuania ran away with him and Poland is annoying and Ivan's heartbroken. Belarus tried to kill everyone and Lithuania has nice hair and Ivan hates Natalya but he doesn't and he really loves her as a sister and Poland is a slut."

"…What? You're not making any sense!"

"I don't know anymore. I can't take this! Natalya wants to marry our brother and Ivan is scared of her. She wants me to help her and he wants me to help him and I don't know what to do!"

That made more sense. Everyone knew about the strange relationship between Russia and Belarus, but Mathew had never thought of Ukraine who was caught in the middle.

"Maybe you should just stay out of it…"

"But they're my brother and sister! I have to do something! Our family is falling apart; I can't just stay out of it."

"This is all my fault!" she cried.

"No it's no-"

"Yes it is!" she shouted, "I wasn't a good mother to her, that's why she turned out like this!"

"Nikita…" he murmured.

"I was always to busy at the farm and helping Ivan with school to spend time with her. It's my fault she's so close to Ivan! If I had paid more attention to her…if I had raised her better she wouldn't have turned out like this! She…was such a sweet girl when she was little. I must have done something wrong…" she revealed before bursting into tears.

Matt was horrified. He didn't know what to do. He just sat and listened to her cry. He wished he could be there to comfort her. He wanted to take her into his arms and tell her everything was going to be ok.

"Nikita, I think you've done a great job raising Belarus and Russia. I can tell that they love you very much. You have too much on your plate. If you tell them that I'm sure they'd understand."

"You think so?"

"Yeah, I do. You're working way too hard. You need a break. I know! When we get all this stuff sorted out, let's go on vacation, just the two of us."

"Really?"

"Um, yeah… I mean if you want to…"

"I'd like that." She said smiling.

She knew that it probably wouldn't happen. That Kumajiro wasn't going to get better, that her siblings wouldn't suddenly start to get along, that her workload wasn't going to suddenly diminish and that Mathew wouldn't stop going to all the endless G8 meetings and world meetings that were always going on. But she really liked the idea of spending a few days alone with him.

"Matt?"

"Yes?"

"Hurry up and come back."

Why was writing about PrussiaxHungary, my favorite pairing ever, so difficult, but writing that LithuaniaxRussia kiss was so easy? I purposely wrote about the straight pairings because I thought it'd be easier for me to write than the yaoi ones but apparently I'm wrong!