Chapter 3: Explanations and Long lists
Riley Stoll's POV:

"WHY DID YOU DO THAT?" Ron screamed from Gryffindor table in horror at what I had just done… oh dear Zeus this would be a funny task!

I looked helplessly towards Dumbledore. Had he explained the situation or would I have to explain everything? I doubted that he would tell them without my permission but still. I grabbed a bit of food off of my plate nibbling at it nervously. Was I aloud to tell them, or would I get in trouble for introducing another world of danger to them?

"You may explain everything to them all" Dumbledore answered my unspoken question.

"Well, like I was telling Hermione, Harry and Ron earlier, in muggle society there's a thing called Greek Mythology. It's about what the ancient Greek people believed in. In that there were the 12 Olympians, the major Gods and Goddesses and Minor Gods and Goddesses that had defeated the Titans, another group of rulers. Anyway in Greek Mythology the Gods and Goddesses sometimes came down to earth and had affairs with mortals, people like your-selves and like the muggles who live alongside your kind in blissful unawareness. The children of these affairs are called Demi-gods or Half-bloods. Camp Half blood is a camp dedicated to bringing us together and teaching us how to defend ourselves" I explained.

"You can't expect us to possibly believe that load of rubbish" a slytherin boy called across the hall.

"I do for I tell the truth. We are trained with swords, bows and arrows, daggers and other forms of blades to protect ourselves. We are also taught Greek Mythology there so that we know a bit about our parents and grand-parents and the monsters we'll face in the upcoming war. Our Dark-lord is also coming back, only ours is more dangerous!"

"'How can anyone be more powerful than Voldemort?" a Gryffindor asked… curse them!

"Uh… I don't know… it's just that he's IMMORTAL; he has a giant army of IMMORTAL followers and, wait for it, an army of monsters that never truly die because after you kill them, they REFORM! If you're lucky they'll reform in a couple of decades, if you're unlucky they'll reform after a few DAYS!" the kids were just looking at me like I was crazy.

"And WHY DID YOU THROW THE PERFECTLY GOOD FOOD INTO THE FIRE?" Ron screamed looking rather distraught.

"I gave a sacrifice to my father Ronald! A sacrifice to Hermes, the God of messages, thieves, travellers and athletics" I said in my matter-of-fact tone. The look on the muggle-borns faces was price-less… the slytherins had no clue what was happening, except one who was looking curiously. In reality he could've passed for a child of Hades or of Nemesis but I doubted that he was. He had shaggy black hair that fell slightly in front of his eyes and looked pretty tall while he was sitting down and looked quite lanky.

Many minutes of explaining later –

"You shall be staying with Gryffindor for the duration of your stay" Dumbledore told me. This would be amusing wouldn't it?

"So when are my friends coming?"

"Tomorrow morning" with that said I was escorted to Gryffindor common room. Everything was red and gold and gave a majestic sort of feeling.

"Wow" I heard myself murmur, resulting in a few amused glances. "What, I grew up in a giant run down shack with all of my brothers and sisters… and the new comers!"

"Welcome to-"

"Gryffindor common room" two red-headed boys said coming towards me. The twins Ron told me about… Fred and George… They both put an arm over my shoulder and guided me up the stairs to what I knew was the boy's dormitory of their year.

"So what pranks-"

"Are you planning-"

"Ron told us about you and your siblings" they concluded together.

"I don't know, perhaps my brothers gave me a list of what not to do so I wouldn't obey that list!" I said innocently. "But while I'm here, watch your pockets!" I continued, smirking slightly as they watched in shock as I pulled their wallets and wands out of my pocket. Oh the fun involved in being the child of the mischievous God of thieves. Yup, father's a really bad role-model to all of his loving children!

"How, what, where?" a lot of questions spluttered out of both of their mouths as I just smirked at it all.

"It probably comes from looting the camp-store, hot-wiring the camp van and being a child of the god of thieves" I said lazily waving my hand. "But I could use some help with some of the things on the list, actually a lot of the things on the list! Here it is!"

Things I Am Not Allowed To Do At Hogwarts:

1) The Giant Squid is not an appropriate date to the Yule Ball.

2) I am not allowed to sing, "We're Off to See the Wizard" while skipping off to the Headmaster's office.

3) I am not allowed to take out a life insurance policy on Harry Potter.

4) I am not allowed to ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

5) I am not allowed to give Remus Lupin a flea collar.

6) I am not allowed to bring a Magic 8 Ball to Divination.

7) I am not allowed to say that Seamus Finnegan is "after me lucky charms."

8) I am not allowed to start a betting pool on this years Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. It's taste-less, tacky, and not a good money-making strategy.

9) I am not allowed to joke about Remus' "time of the month."

10) I am not allowed to make light saber sounds with my wand.

11) I am not to refer to the Accio charm as "The Force."

12) I am not allowed to claim that growing marijuana or hallucinogenic mushrooms is "Extra Herbology Work."

13) I will not use my socks to make hand-puppets of the Slytherin-House mascot.

14) If the thought of a spell makes me giggle for more than 15 seconds, assume that I am not allowed to use it.

15) I will not lock the Slytherins and Gryffindors in a room together and bet on which House will come out alive.

16) I will not charm the suits of armor to do a rendition of "The Knights of the Round Table" for the Christmas Feast.

17) I am not allowed to declare an official "Hug A Slytherin Day."

18) I am not allowed to sing my own personal spy music while wandering the hallways.

19) It is not necessary to yell, "BURN!" Whenever Snape takes points away from Gryffindor.

20) I will not say the phrase, "Get a Life" to Voldemort.

21) First years are not to be fed to Fluffy.

22) I will never ask Harry if his Voldie senses are tingling.

23) It is not necessary to yell, "BAM" every time I Apparate.

24) I will not steal Gryffindor's sword from Dumbledore's office and use it to patrol the hallways.

25) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write, "Told you I was Hard Core."

26) If a class-mate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.

27) House Elves are not acceptable replacements for Bludgers.

28) I do not weigh the same as a Duck.

29) I will not lick Trevor.

30) I will not dress up as Voldemort on Halloween.

31) It is a bad idea to tell Snape he takes himself too seriously.

32) I will not tell Sir Cadogan that The Knight's Who Say Ni have challenged him to a duel, then have all the students say, 'Ni' from various directions.

33) I am not the King of the Potato People and I do not have a flying carpet.

34) "To conquer the Earth with an army of flying monkeys" is not a career choice.

35) I will not tell the first years that Professor Snape is the Voice of God.

I pulled out the other list that my brothers gave me after that.

Things I am not allowed to do at Hogwarts: part2

1) I will not, under any circumstances, ask Harry Potter who died and made him boss

2) Professor Flitwick's first name is not Yoda

3) I will not give Hagrid Pokémon cards and convince him they're real animals

4) I will not sing the Badger Song during Hufflepuff-Slytherin quidditch matches

5) When Death Eaters are attacking Hogsmeade, I shall not point at the Dark Mark and shout "To the Bat-mobile, Robin!"

6) Any resemblance between Dementors and Nazgul is simply coincidental

7) I will not refer to the Weasley Twins as "bookends"

8) I will not scare the Arithmacy students with my Calculus book.

9) I will not hold my wand in the air before I casting spells shouting "I got the power!"

10) I am not allowed to paint the house elves blue and call them smurfs.

11) I will not slip Malfoy a Love Potion in his morning goblet of Pumpkin Juice.

12) Should I chance to see a Death Eater wearing a white mask, I should not start singing anything from The Phantom of the Opera.

13) I will not call Dumbledore "Santa Claus!" during the Christmas Holidays.

14) I will not put Muggle fairy book in the History section at the library.

15) I will not send Snape a bottle of shampoo for Christmas.

16) I am not allowed to tell Hufflepuffs there is no Santa Clause.

17) I am not allowed to refer to myself as the New Dark Lord.

18) I am not allowed to sneak into Professor Snape's private chambers to watch him sing I Will Survive in the mirror, as it is disturbing.

19) I am not allowed to steal Professor Flitwick's wand, hold it over my head and laugh as he tries to reach it.

20)I will not replace Madam Pomfrey's Skele-Gro with pumpkin juice.

21) I will not replace Professor Snape's pumpkin juice with Skele-Gro.

22) I will not impersonate the Swedish Chef in Potions class.

23) The next time that I see Rita Skeeter, I am not to threaten her with a can of Raid.

24.) I will not subvert the lock on the fourth-floor girls' bathroom and sell its location to first-years as "The Chamber of Secrets".

25) When applying for a post at the Ministry of Magic after graduation, I should not cite "Fred and George Weasley" as my greatest influence at Hogwarts.

26) Putting down "Lord Voldemort" is probably not best either.

27) A Muggle "vacuum cleaner" is not acceptable Quidditch equipment, even if it has been enchanted to fly.

28) Hogsmeade village is not "a wretched hive of scum and villainy. "

29) I will not tell Professor Trelawney that I prophesied her death.

30) I will also not tell Professor Trelawney that I had a vision of her killing the Dark Lord.

40.) Sending rings to the nine senior faculties at Yuletide, with the return address "Voldemort", is not funny.

41) Insisting that the school acquire computers and network the buildings is a pointless request as they claim that a quill and parchment is sufficient.

42) Calling the Ghostbusters is a cruel joke to play on the resident ghosts and poltergeists.

43) I may not have a private army.

44) I must not substitute chocolate-flavoured laxative for Professor Lupin's prescription-strength chocolate.

45) Nor am I to in any way substitute, alter, hide, or otherwise tamper with Professor Dumbledore's candy.

46) I am not the wicked witch of the west.

47) -I will not refer to Professor Umbridge as such either.

48) I will not melt if water is poured over me.

49) -Neither will Professor Umbridge.

50) I shouldn't use Photoshop to create incriminating photos of my house prefects or tutors.

51) I will not enchant the Golden Snitch to fly up the nearest fan's nose.

52) I do not know the Avada Kedavra curse, and pretending I do to people who annoy me is not funny, no matter how much they injure themselves diving for cover.

53) I will not test my Potions assigments by spiking Snape's drink with them.

54) - Especially not all of them at once.

55) I will not try to hock off my old piercings as "priceless Muggle artifacts."

56) I will not claim my X-Files tapes are "Auror Training Videos."

57) Professor Snape definitely does not have pointed ears, and under no circumstances is he to be addressed as 'Spock'.

58) I am not able to see the Grim Reaper, nor am I to claim that he is standing by the Headmaster, tapping an hourglass and looking at him impatiently. Or, for that matter, Harry Potter.

59) When being interrogated by a member of staff, I am not to wave my hand and announce 'These are not the droids you are looking for'.

60) Thestrals do not resemble the Muggle toys known as 'My Little Pony'.

61) The four Houses are not the Morons, the Borons, the Smarts and the Junior Death Eaters.

62) Despite my personal beliefs, Quidditch would not be improved by the introduction of muggle firearms.

63) Though they are doubtless more athletic, battle-axes are not acceptable either.

64) I will not claim there is a prequel to Hogwarts, A History that explains about Bilbo Baggins.

65) I will not use the Marauder's Map for stalking purposes.

66) I am not allowed to introduce Peeves to paintballing.

67) I am not allowed to ask Professor Dumbledore if the size of his beard is 'compensating for something'.

68) I will not create a betting pool that Voldemort is Harry Potter's father.

69) Headmaster Dumbledore is of no relation to Willy Wonka.

70) Professor Snape's proper given name is not Princess Silvermoon Fairywing GlimmerMcSparkles.

71) Harry Potter and Ron Weasley are not the magical equivalent of "Batman and Robin".

72) I will not play the Imperial March theme for Professor Snape.

73) However, when Lucius Malfoy visits, I may play it.

74) If I insist on carrying out my plans of producing "Riddle-de-dee: The Voldemort Musical", I will do so under a nom-de-plume.

75) I will not attempt to recruit the title character to play himself. Even if he looks good in tap shoes.

76) I should not refer to Malfoy, Crabbe and Goyle collectively as "Team Rocket" either.

77) I am not allowed to discuss my theory that Voldemort is actually the second cousin of Sauron.

78) I am not a 'ninja sent here by Lord Voldemort to destroy Harry Potter' and should stop shouting this at meal times.

79) It's not tasteful to approach Cho wearing a shirt that says All the good looking ones die young with a picture of Cedric Diggory on it.

80) I will not yell "Hey look it's Lord Voldemort!" at Hogsmeade

81) I will not tease Voldemort about the time he needed his pink flowery teddy bear to comfort him when he had that bad, bad nightmare about Harry

82) I will not charm a poster of Britney Spears on Draco's wall

83) I am not allowed to begin each Herbology class by singing the theme song to "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes."

84) I will not call Professor McGonagall "McGoogles".

85) I will not sing the entire Multiplication Rocks series during Arithmacy exams.

86) There is no such thing as the chamber of Double Secret Probation.

87) My name is not "the Dark Lord Happy-Pants" I am not allowed to sign my papers as such.

88) Bringing fortune cookies to divination class does not count for extra credit.

89) I will not douse Harry Potter's invisibility cloak with lemon juice to see if he will become visible while wearing it and standing by the fire in the common room.

90) I will not tell first years they should build a tree house in the Whomping Willow.

91) I will not teach the house elves to impersonate Jar Jar Binks.

92) I will not give Gryffindors pixie sticks.

93) I am not allowed to refer to Susan Bones, Hannah Abbot, and Justin Finch-Fletchley as Blossom, Buttercup, and Bubbles.

94) A time turner is not a flux capacitator I should therefore not try to install it in a muggle car.

95) I shall not refer to DADA professors as canaries in a coal mine.

96) When fighting deatheaters in the annual June good vs. evil fight I will not lift my wand skyward and shout "There can only be ONE".

97) A wand is for magic only, it is not for picking noses, playing snooker, or playing drums no matter how bored I become.

98) It is generally accepted that cats and dragons cannot interbreed and I should not attempt to disprove this theory no matter how wicked the results would be.

99) 42 is not the answer to every question on the O.W.L.S.

100) I am allowed to have a cat, rat, toad, or an owl. I am not allowed to have reticulated python, snow leopard, Tasmanian devil, or piranha.

101) No matter how good an Australian accent I can do I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

102) I will not refer to the Defense against the Dark arts professor as Kenny, even if he is wearing an orange anorak.

103) Dumbledore is not Gandalf, and the Triforce is not hidden in Hogwarts.

"Do you see why I need your help?" I asked hopefully.

"Yes, you can't"

"Use magic" one of them finished.

"Yes, you are correct. And remember we only have one year to do all of this!" with that I grabbed the sheets of paper and walked back into the common room, realizing everyone had already gone to bed I sighed. My brothers were so much more fun than these people! I gave another bored to death can Hades just kindly take me away from this place sigh and resentfully walked into the girls common room for a good night sleep…

Annabeth and Percy would so kill me tomorrow!

Hey guys please review and also I will be adding a game of Truth or Dare every know and them between all the characters so send in any Truths or Dares that you have for any characters… I mean all of them!

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