I own nothing.
I just...i wanted today to be a happy day, but as luck would have it...no.
So... Reid/comment/take heart that the new season will be out in ten days. Yay?
Sorry for this...wallowing.
Reid breathes in deep.
Today is one of those days he'd rather be buried in the covers, removed from the world for once.
But sadly, he stuck behind plastered walls and florescent lighting; stacks of files thicker than his medical files and very short of coffee.
Today is not going to be a very good day.
People mill around, the clouds matching their sluggish pace as the rain unleash its fury against the window.
His chest is tight as he tries to remember what it's like to breathe; I mean really take in enough air and not feel like you're drowning.
His fingers tremble as he tries to make his hand pick up his discarded pen, but he can't. He's just so...tired; body sagging under the strain of the melancholy air.
How are they supposed to do this again?
Jump back into the gruesomeness what has become their lives. The reason they can't sleep, relationships disintegrate, lives are lost...the reason why Reid feels so alone.
So totally, utterly alone at the moment.
He doesn't even realize that he's sobbing until he feels Morgan's hand rubbing slow circles in his shoulder.
Morgan's face is dower as he wordlessly touches Reid's elbow, lifting him slightly for him to stand.
He steers a shaky Reid to an empty conference room, Reid placing his weight on Morgan's arm.
Morgan sets Reid down on a couch, turning to lock the door behind them.
Reid draws his knees to his chest, wiry limbs hugging his legs as he keens, sound filling the empty space.
"Kid..." No words come to Morgan as he stares, lost.
How can he comfort Reid when he doesn't know how to comfort himself. They're both moored against the shore.
But Morgan wants to be strong for Reid's sake, not because he thinks Reid is weak, but because Reid needs more support, he's been through so much already, they all have.
And it hurts to see any of them in pain, but when it's Reid...you just have to feel for him. It's indescribable how much Morgan wants to smooth away pain; he wants to put a smile on Reid's face for once.
Like before Prentiss, Haley, Gideon. Before Hankel and Elle, before his mother got really bad, before his father left. Before...
And it scares Morgan the most, because he doesn't think he can. He's not enough and he doesn't know what to do. And no matter how much he wants, he feels as if those are only words. And what the fuck good are words if there's no action behind them. And there's a panic rising to his chest, threatening to choke his throat as he braces himself. He wants to scream with how maddening this whole situation in. And this wouldn't have happened if Prentiss would have trusted her team, their family...him. Goddamn it, why did she think she couldn't trust him? He was right there for christ sake. HE WAS RIGHT FUCKING THERE!
"Derek?"
Morgan shivers at the sorrow in Reid's voice, startled by his first name. They never use their first names.
"Spencer- I'm sorry. I don't..." Morgan shakes his head, tears threatening to spill.
"I just...could you-" Reid stumbles, trying to catch his breathe, trying to hold on to himself.
Morgan lets out a shuttering breath as he kneels beside Reid, wrapping his arms around him tight. And Reid lets go. They both do, as the greif swells around their hearts, cresting against their ribs, rising like tides. It cleans them...it carries them away to a place where it's okay.
It's okay to feel this sadness, this terror, this darkness; as long as they have each other to help pull each other out.
They have a hope that they'll be okay one day.
A/N: I'm breaking and I don't know how to fix it.