"The Visitor Complex: The Stairwell Entrapment"
Chapter 3 of 6

Sheldon usually knew better than to knock on Penny's door too early, but in this case, as far as he knew she was expecting him. Leonard couldn't drive him to work that morning, and it had taken the promise of banana bread, but he'd convinced Penny to give him a lift. He would still point out her oft abused 'check engine' light and she would still ignore him… It was becoming routine for him… a dangerous, life-threatening routine… With his bag slung around him, he left the apartment, shut the door, then took the four steps across the hall and stopped at Penny's door. He knocked three times in quick succession.

"Penny," he called. He gave three more. "Penny," he repeated, and after three more knocks, "Penny." He waited, staring at his shoes, and then he heard a voice… not the one he'd called for.

"She's not here," Brittany's voice came through the door. "Who is it?" His head shot back up.

"Wh… It's Sheldon. Sheldon Cooper. From across the hall…" he explained further, annoyed.

"Oh, right," he heard the door unlock and then it swung open to reveal the blonde standing there, slippers on her feet he recognized as Penny's. "She went to get gas. She says you're impossible when she has to stop at the gas station on the way." He would have argued, kind of wanted to, but there were more important things to bring up.

"Did you sleep here?"

"I wanted banana bread," she told him, eyeing the loaf in his hand. He looked down as well. With a frown, he held it out, and she snatched it away. "Thanks," she moved into the kitchen like she'd lived there for years and unwrapped the loaf on the counter, pulling a knife to slice it. She took two slices, put them in a paper towel, and then looked up at him. "Okay, let's go," she moved to the door, kicking off the slippers and slipping on her sandals. Sheldon startled.

"Go? Go where?" he asked. She looked back at him.

"Penny wanted to take the day off to take me places, but she couldn't so she took the afternoon off. I'm going to hang out at the restaurant again…" she trailed off, and he had to wonder what it was that put the hint of excitement in her voice, if it was the promise of more cheesecake or more shaker filling… He wouldn't be surprised with either answer. Either way, he was still brought to a single conclusion: she was coming with them in the car… She was not getting the front seat away from him; not today.

"Alright, let's get to it, I guess," he moved to the door and they walked out together, bound for the stairs.

"I don't like the gas station either," he heard her voice from behind, and he looked back at her – was she trying for small talk? Was he supposed to talk to her?

"It's not that I don't like them, but most people show a complete lack of respect for the institution," he shook his head.

"I don't like the smell," was her response, and he set off.

"The smell is one of the best parts after the bell!" he insisted.

"It makes me feel like I'll be sick," she shuddered.

"Well, then, it's a good thing we're not going to one today," he hoped this would spell the end of the conversation. If it went on much further, he could be tempted to address her schooling, which Leonard had begged him not to do, even if it could only be the best option to solve the issue as early as possible while she was still young. For a little while, it seemed maybe he would have his peace and quiet, but then… All he had to hear was an intake of breath from behind and he knew… there was more coming.

"What's so different about that last cushion? On your couch?" He stalled and she nearly bumped into his back. He looked back at her, about to ask her if she'd sat on it. "Penny said some things, but it was really fast and it made no sense."

"Well that's Penny…"

"Why can't you sit somewhere else?" she asked. He sighed.

"I can sit somewhere else, but I would rather not. My seat is the best seat, for a number of reasons you apparently could not understand. But I know it's the right place, and that's what matters."

"It's stupid," she told him, and his face twisted into the shackles of his self-restraint, which would not hold for much longer if she kept poking at it. He could hear her munching on bits of banana bread as she went, could smell the loaf he himself had baked while everyone else was out showing the Ohio girl around Pasadena the night before.

"Well that's your opinion, and although I have many… many points in which that is so very wrong, but I've been promised a hoard of items from Leonard, Koothrappali and Wolowitz if I played nice, so I'll just take comfort in the fact that you at least know not to sit in my seat."

"You kind of remind of this girl back home," she frowned.

"Does she get aggravated at you, too?"

"What?" her voice got higher all of a sudden. "Rachel's not dead!" she shook her head.

"I never said that," he looked at her, now completely confused. "Where did you get that?"

"Aggravated… Doesn't that mean to put in a grave?"

"Oh, I do not have the patience for this…" he muttered to himself as he tried to hurry down the steps, even though every time he did that he would hear his Meemaw's voice in his head, telling him not to run down stairs or he would trip and break his head open. It didn't seem physically possible, but he wasn't going to challenge the woman's judgment. When they got the bottom of the stairs, Penny was just coming back through the door and he barrelled toward her. "If Leonard can't drive me tomorrow, I'm calling in sick," he told her.

"Hey, Brittany," Penny called happily over his shoulder, completely ignoring him. "How's the bread? Good, uh?" she asked, and she got a 'uh-uh' from within a mouthful of the baked good. Finally she looked back to Sheldon. "Tell me, what are you going to do tonight, if Leonard can't drive you home?" He paused to consider this, then started back up the stairs. "Hey, where are you going?" Penny called out after him.

"Getting a blanket. It gets chilly in my office. I'm not going to freeze to death if I'm going to sleep in there."

"Do you want me to come with?" Brittany asked as he passed her.

"No! No… no, no, that's alright," he hurried along. Brittany looked back to Penny, who came over and broke off a piece of the bread for herself.

"See? And I live across the hall from that…" Brittany just smirked.

TO BE CONTINUED (TOMORROW)