Sorry for the double post of this chapter Beta noticed a mistake and I fixed it right away...Enjoy!
I wanted to take just a moment to share a link with you all. I know that many of you read several stories at one time, much the same as myself. I know that you all have viewed a story that talks about being nominated for this or that award. There is a new award nomination going on right now called the Inspired awards. Please take the couple of seconds to check it out. Nominate your favorites in the categories it has listed...This is geared at getting the un-known's out there noticed. (Remove the spaces and ( ) to access the link)..There are only a few days left to make those nominations, please make your favorites known, and give your favorite authors that much needed and deserved pat on the back.
http: / inspiredfanficawards (.) blogspot (.) com /?zx=1d6f0ceacdbecb70
OR
Check out I Read Dirty Fan Fic on Facebook and find the link there. This is well worth your time.
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All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. Characters may belong to SM, but this story using them belongs to me. No harm is intended by use of these characters, just giving them some adult pleasures.
My experience in the BDSM world is non-existent. I am doing research and have asked for some advice from a person who has experience. There is no way possible for me to convey the 100% true feelings, trust, and devotion involved in the BDSM lifestyle. I hope that no one is offended by the way that I portray this lifestyle and its choices, and please believe that I would never purposely do , write, or say anything to make this lifestyle or the choices of those in this lifestyle seem bad. I truly hope that you all enjoy this fictional story.
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Chapter 4: Up to Hump Day
EPOV
Waking up in a cold sweat with a rock hard cock is not a good start to my Monday morning. I take a cold shower, think of a lot of nasty things, and finally get my libido in check. Then I grab some coffee, the packet of papers, and head off to work. It is colder than a well digger's ass outside for only early October. I don't know if I will ever get used to the cold Iowa fall weather, much less the bitter cold winters.
I get to work and settle into my office. I have a meeting today at two about the design and build of a new hotel. The rest of my day is pretty free. I only have a few designs that need a tweak here or there. I quickly get all my work done, except for the meeting, and begin going through the paperwork my Mistress gave me to review. First, I want to look at her limit sheet. According to the directions, I am to go over the entire list and decide if I have questions on anything or any additions I want to discuss with her.
Domme's Limits List:
Green:
* Anal sex (giving and receiving)
* Cunnilingus
* Double penetration (giving and receiving only if one item of penetration is a toy)
* Use of toys
* Fellatio
* Intercourse
* Swallowing/licking cum (giving and receiving)
* Bondage
* Collaring
* Cuffing
* Gagging
* Harnessing
* Rope restraints
* Spreader bars
* Suspension
* Foot worship
* Leather wearing
* Caning
* Clips and clamps
* Flogging
* Light scratching
* Whipping/spanking (giving)
* Wax
* Ice
* Blindfolding
* Non-permanent branding
* Dress-up play
* Role play
* Set scene play
* Forced nudity
* Food play
* Exhibitionism
* Kneeling
* Hair pulling
* Humiliation (private)
* Licking (receiving and giving)
* Massage (receiving and giving)
* Romantic play
* Sensory deprivation
* Serving
* Shaving whole body (except head)
* Teasing Tickling
* Verbal humiliation (private)
* Voyeurism
Yellow:
* Videoed scenes
* Pictures
* Tattoos
* Piercing
* Hood
* Strait jackets
* Stocks
Red:
* Impaired play
* Mummification
* Saran wrapping
* Breath control
* Brown showers
* Golden showers
* Menstrual service
* Eating or drinking of waste
* Permanent branding
* Burning
* Needles
* Cutting
* Electricity play
* Bottoming/switch
* Spanking (receiving)
* Anything not listed on Domme's list, will be considered red, until discussed and correct placement on this list has been determined.
Looking at the limits, I have no issues with any of them. I am glad to see the romantic scene on the green list as well as both surprised and delighted to see she likes to be fucked anally as well. This thought does not help the ache in my groin, which reminds me I want my Mistress in many ways, much more than I probably should. I pick up the packet marked 'rules'. There is a cover letter saying the rules apply to both the sub and the domme and will be specifics made regarding certain rule situations. Also before the signing of the contract, rules will be discussed and altered as needed.
Suggested rules for Domme, submissive relationship:
Between: Domme, Isabella Marie Swan and submissive, Edward Anthony Cullen
Safe word system end and walk away word option will be used by both Domme and submissive at all times while submissive is collared or in a submissive situation with Domme. System is as follows.
Green: All is good keep going
Yellow: Okay, but do not push any harder or further
Red: Stop and end immediately
End and walk away word option safe word can be used at any time with no questions asked, by either participant. End and walk away safe word is knick-knack.
No consumption of alcoholic beverages before playing. The only exception is wine with dinner, if applicable. No playing at all if either Domme or submissive are impaired, even slightly, by alcohol.
The submissive will always refer to Domme as Mistress when collared and Ma'am when not collared, unless in public. The submissive will refer to Domme as Ma'am when not collared. In public, submissive may call Domme Isabella, only if absolutely necessary. The submissive should try to avoid speaking Domme's name unless no other choice is available.
While at public meetings and special events, rules will be established and used according to what is agreed upon per situation.
No swapping, sharing, role-playing, intimate or sexual acts of any kind with anyone besides each other while under the Domme/submissive contract. Failure to comply is immediate termination of contract and Domme/sub relationship.
Domme will provide all after care while being aware and in-tune with any of the sub's needs, at all times. Domme will provide all items, products, and procedures needed to fulfill all portions of the contract.
The submissive will not touch or pleasure himself, unless under direct order from Domme.
The submissive will not have an orgasm without his Domme's permission.
The submissive's orgasms belong to his Domme while under the contract, collared or not. Failure to comply is punishment.
Domme will collar submissive Friday evening at six and will remain collared until Sunday afternoon at three. After collar has been removed, the submissive and Domme will spend no less than two hours sharing open communication.
Neither submissive nor Domme will date or be with another person in any way considered non-platonic. If either needs a date for a work or private obligation, advance notice is expected and will be provided. Last minute notice may work, depends on scheduling.
All non-collared communication will be done respectfully.
Communication is extremely important in this Dom/sub relationship: lies, half-truths, and omitting things will be punished. During the week, Domme or submissive may reach the other via cell phone, by landline phone, email, or texting. Domme will provide a Blackberry cell phone with internet for insurance of communication.
The submissive, when collared, follows every direction of the Domme, no questions asked. If an issue arises, use your safe word and resolve the issue. Failure to comply is punishment.
The submissive will make sure his entire body is clean and clear of all body hair; except hair on head, eyes, and eyebrows. Failure to comply is punishment.
The submissive will participate in and keep a set physical fitness regimen. Failure to comply is punishment. Personal trainer will help set up a regimen. First meeting will be Saturday morning after contract is accepted. Regimen will be altered as needed.
Punishments are at the discretion of the Domme, who will use the limits sheet as reference to acceptable punishments.
I have no issues with any of the rules and really want to be with Isabella. I cannot remember ever wanting a woman in my life as badly as I want her in mine. I look forward to seeing her Wednesday, missing her presence already.
Tuesday at the office was chaos. I had meetings all day long and there was no time to dwell on my Mistress. When I did think of her, I knew I had to redirect those thoughts because sitting in my office sporting massive wood in my pants was not conducive to discussing design details with my clients. That night, I had an early dinner meeting, feeling very out of place since I was the only stag person, and remembered I need to be sure to ask my Mistress about future outings. I begged off early and was home by eight.
When I get home, I check the answering machine and listen to a message from my mom. I call my parents to see how they are and let them know I will be at dinner Sunday night. We talk briefly and my mother does her best trying to set me up with an old school mate's daughter, telling me the girl is divorced after twelve years of marriage and has no children. I interrupt my mom, telling her firmly that I'm not interested because I am seeing someone. Then, of course, I have to field off questions asking when I will bring her over to meet them. I sidestep her questions and manage to get off the phone without being interrogated much more.
I have not taken a woman home to meet my parents since my third year at Harvard. It took me many years to get past the hatred and animosity I felt when my last relationship went south.
I fell hard and fast for Sue. She seemed to have such a pure heart. Everyone loved her and thought she was supportive, loving, giving, and just beautiful. At Christmas our senior year, I proposed to her and moved her into the huge condo I shared with my three guy roommates. We had always gotten along and they had no issue with her being there. They told me they loved her cooking. I gave her everything money could buy and served it up with my whole heart on a platter.
The day I got sick with the stomach flu and came home four hours before I was expected was the worse day of my life. I found her in our bed with not just one of our 'friends', but with all three of them. I was shocked and could not even move. I guess I found out what my 'girlfriend' cooked up that my friends really liked. They didn't even notice me standing there outside the open bedroom door watching. When she finally noticed me, she smirked at me. All I remember her saying was, "it felt so good finally being fucked by anyone who knew how to take control".
I moved out the next day, taking only my personal and private things. I even left her the furniture. I never looked back. Sue tried taking me to court for palimony. She quit her job when she first moved in with me. I didn't worry much about it then, figuring she needed the extra time to study. I had enough money to support both of us so it was never an issue.
Luckily, I won the case and didn't have to give her any money. The judge ruled she had quit her job on her own accord and not because of any pressure on my part.
To this day, outside of the lifestyle, I've deliberately chosen to be alone and not partake in any relationship. Although at first it hurt, knowing that she only wanted me for my money, I no longer hate Sue. I do regret the time I wasted with her and know, for her, our relationship was nothing more than a lie. Sue was a master of deceit, managing to fool not only me, but also my entire family. It was a costly mistake, but one I won't make again.
It took me a long time to find this lifestyle, to realize and accept this is where I belong. Sue was correct when she said I don't like being in charge. Nothing makes me feel more cared for and needed than when I entrust myself in the hands of another. I feel the click of rightness with my Mistress and am thankful to Peter and Charlotte for helping bring us together.
I fall asleep with a smile on my face knowing in less then twenty-four hours I will have the honor of being in the presence of my Mistress.
BPOV
This past weekend blew me away. I struggled with the desires Edward evoked in me.
I have only been in one previous relationship that did not entail BDSM. It was with Mike Newton. Other than my involvement with him, I haven't regretted anything I have done in my life.
I loved Mike with all my heart. We were Junior and Senior High School sweethearts. Prom king and queen with all the wonderful rite of passage crap. We went away to college together and even lived together off-campus from the get go.
Mike was very controlling. I always let him make all the choices for me, including having a joint checking account and allowing him complete control over our financials. He was studying to be an accountant. If there was something I wanted or wished to do and he said no I just let it go and dropped it. Shortly after I started my second semester of law school, my world came to crashing halt and things changed me forever.
It was extremely cold outside. I came in the apartment and started removing all the layers of clothing I wore. I took my stuff, put it away, and went in to change into my 'stay home' clothes. I knew Mike would be home from his job in about an hour, so I went in the kitchen, washed my hands, and started cooking dinner. Dinner was almost ready when Mike came in and right away I could tell he had been drinking. I knew something was wrong because he never drank. I asked him what was going on and he told me we needed to talk.
He sat down at the table and proceeded to dump a steaming pile of shit all over my world, telling me he had fallen in love with a co-ed three years ago. He had been with her secretly almost every day since he met her. All those business trips with his new firm were not really business trips. All the late hours and weekend work was a lie. Now he was leaving me for her because she was pregnant with his second child! He cried, kept repeating how sorry he was, and how he'd never meant to hurt me.
My head was reeling with his revelations, but then the story got even worse. Mike managed to drain every dime in our joint checking account and was overdrawn by almost five hundred dollars. I guess he received notice the same day our rent check bounced like a rubber ball. When I learned all this, I was never so glad to know most all of my money was in a separate account, at the advice of my parent's attorney who handled their will.
The only money in the joint account was the money deposited into the account each January, which was only what I needed to pay our living expenses each year. It was now almost November and with the estimated three thousand a month allowance, he could not have spent more than six thousand dollars. Not that I wasn't upset he got away with it, but at least he didn't get his hands on the money in my big account. I had never been so happy I listened to Mr. Cope's legal advice and kept my inheritance separate from the everyday expense money at the bank.
I know now Mike would have spent of all of the money if he could have gotten his hands on it, leaving me penniless and alone. He tried talking me into buying a house several times in the months before the breakup. I am so glad I never let him talk me into that. It was bad enough I stupidly put his name on the title of the car I bought, giving him the ability to take it when he left.
My mom died shortly after I was born. She was killed with her parents in an accident while heading to the funeral of her only aunt. Oddly enough, my mother was an only child and grew up having only her parents and her aunt as family. Therefore her parent's estate was left to her and me by default. In addition, the aunt who passed away was a spinster who left her estate to her only niece and me by default. Growing up I never wanted or needed for anything, except a mom and family other than my dad. My dad did a great job, but it was just him and me, no aunts, uncles, grandparents, or mom. I had more than enough money, but money does not buy happiness or family closeness.
The day of the accident, at only ten days old and too small to travel, my father stayed home with me. My father was the chief of police and loved his job. After mom died, his job became his life and his fellow officers at the local station, both men and women became the family we didn't have. We ate dinner at the town's only diner every day and most of our holiday meals were at one friend's house or another until I was old enough to learn some cooking skills. My father never touched any money left to me. It was for my college and adult life he always said.
When I was in high school, he allowed me to use enough money to purchase a new car. He let me spend a decent amount, wanting me to have the safest rated vehicle on the road. During my senior year I got the acceptance letter to attend Colombia University. I always wanted to be a lawyer and they had a prestigious law school. I was excited to move to New York and attend a top rated Ivy League university.
My father was so proud of me. Sixteen days before graduation he was killed in the line of duty. His insurance policy paid me an amazing amount of money, adding to the sum I inherited from my mother, her parents, and her aunt after their deaths. While I'm not a multi-millionaire I could easily live well for the rest of my life without working. I may be rich, but am all alone in this world. When Mike left me, I was crushed.
I tried dating several times, but only managed to feel more and more put off by the way most men tried overpowering me. I graduated and decided to go into business with a classmate from a small Iowa town. We studied together and passed the bar, both of us starting entry level at his father's firm.
Iowa is not bad. The summers are muggy and the winters are snowy and cold. I still only date sporadically and still have anger issues over Mike. Deciding it best to get over it, I began seeing a therapist who told me I have a very dominating personality and a part of me will always feel the need to control.
I let Mike call all the shots, but still lived by my own accord. He may have paid the bills, but I knew it was my money. He may have made the choices of whom we hung out with or what movie we saw, but I was always the one that supplied the means.
My first therapist sent me to meet with a different therapist specializing with issues like mine. I first met Peter in a support group. Peter became my mentor and I now trust him with my life. I have been out of therapy for a long time and in the BDSM lifestyle a long time as well. I guess I learned I do need to dominate to be happy. I also learned living my life as a dominant is not a bad thing, just intense.
Here it is Wednesday morning and I am looking forward to tonight. I am excited to see Edward again and have stopped myself from picking up the phone several times to call him. I have never felt this way about a man. I almost feel like a piece of me is missing when I am not with him. I called Peter about my feelings and he agreed to meet me for lunch today.
I had a busy morning in court and was extremely glad to leave the courthouse at ten. I'm meeting Peter at Granite City at one, so I hurried back to the office, letting my secretary know I'll be gone for the rest of the day, and glance over my email. Finding one from Edward, I click it open eagerly and read through it.
Ma`am,
Your submissive wants to let you know he finds himself in a dilemma of sorts. He has a business meeting and dinner he needs to attend in Chicago on Thursday, the twenty-ninth of October. Your submissive's issue is an award ceremony held on Friday, the thirtieth and must attend, as he is the recipient of the award being given. Your submissive is in need of an escort for said ceremony and dinner both nights. Your submissive begs your forgiveness in the fact this notice is quite short, having received the information just minutes ago.
Your submissive will see you later this evening.
Thank you for your time.
Your submissive,
Edward
I want to go with him. I buzz my secretary, checking my schedule to see if it's possible for me to accompany Edward. After a quick discussion, I inform her to move the meeting I have to the following week and clear the two days I won't be in the office. I then ring my partner, Jason Jenks, informing him I will be leaving town the night of the twenty-eighth and will not return to the office until Monday the second of November. Having no disagreements about my impromptu few days off, we joke about how it will be 2010 before we know it.
I decide to tell Edward in person tonight. I close out of all my computer programs, lock my office door, and leave to meet Peter. I arrive at Granite City by a quarter to one and settle at the table. When Peter arrives, we quickly give our drink and food orders to the waitress.
"I just love this place," I say, glancing around appreciatively.
"The décor here is nice and relaxing. So what is going on Bella? Where's your head at?"
"No beating around the bush with you, is there Peter?" I chuckle. Keeping quiet, he waits for me to continue with a smirk. "I really like Edward and, as you know, have asked him to be my submissive. I find myself in a place I have never been before though and it concerns me a little."
"I am not sure what you are feeling unless you tell me. I will tell you this though. Before you tell me anything else, consider this, Charlotte was completely convinced you would pick Edward and he is the one for you." The waitress drops off our drinks and appetizer while I think about the words Peter just said.
"Peter I don't know how to describe it, but there was an instant connection between us last weekend. I feel almost excited about seeing him tonight and we are only meeting to go over the rules and contract. I actually left him alone a lot of the time, and I just let the strange feelings I had cloud our time together. I am feeling like I let him down as a Domme and dropped the ball. I never wanted to give myself to someone the way I want to give myself to him. I really am looking forward to seeing him, but am confused by my feelings."
"Bella, you don't need me to tell you are a strong domme. You do know it is okay to have feelings outside of the lifestyle for someone, even if that someone is your submissive. Don't you?"
"Peter, you know me well enough to know I do not do 'feelings'. I only just met him. How can I possibly have feelings for him?"
"You, my dear friend, are a fool if you cannot see the nose on your own face. Charlotte told me this would happen when you told me you were interviewing him. You know how she is and has this uncanny knack, if you will, to read things very clearly. She said to tell you that you should call her and talk to her. She also told me to tell you it is not the Domme stuff you're questioning, it is all about your heart. Oh, look here is my Cuban sandwich and your Asian salad."
I was taken aback by what Peter just said and shocked to know Charlotte is convinced this is a matter of the heart. I thought a lot about it as we ate our food in the mostly quiet atmosphere. We made small talk here and there, but nothing was taking my mind off the serious thoughts whirling through my mind. How am I going to figure this out? I'm not sure what my feelings are. I know three things for sure. One, I was born to be a Domme just as Edward was a natural submissive. Two, I do not want a fulltime 24/7 Domme-sub relationship. Three, I never want Edward submitting to anyone besides me.
"Maybe I should come over and talk to Charlotte," I said out of the blue.
"She said you should talk to her before you meet with Edward tonight and to tell you she will be waiting with tea at three-thirty," he said smirking once again.
"You know I love her to death, and I love you the same. However, sometimes you both really piss me the hell off!" I laugh and snort at him when he gets a mockingly offended look on his face.
"Oh Bella, Charlotte will have so much fun with you this afternoon. Lunch is on me. Get going. Do not keep my wife waiting. You know she will have lots of things to share. You know how I always say do not bet against her? You should heed that advice."
I shake my head and laugh leaving the restaurant. I drive the short distance to their beautiful estate outside the city limits. Buzzing the gate it springs open for me. Parking the car in the front drive, I walk to the door. It opens before I can reach for the ornate handle.
"I knew I was right. I knew you would be here. I just hope you are ready to open that stubborn mind of yours and listen to what I say."
"Well, hello to you too, Charlotte. Yes, it is lovely to see you again. I have been well and how are you doing?" I reply sarcastically.
"Point taken, my friend, come in and have tea with me while I tell you what I think."
Driving home around five I dial Edward's number. "Hello Ma'am."
"Edward, can you come earlier and join me for dinner?"
"Ma'am, I'm leaving work now and can meet you in half an hour. I need to run home to get my things and change out of my work clothing."
"Chinese takeout sound okay?"
"Whatever would please you, Ma'am."
"Alright Edward, I'll see you in forty-five minutes. I will be in the kitchen just come on in. See you soon." With that I hang up, call Tang's, and place the order to be delivered. Driving the rest of the way home I thought back to what Charlotte said.
"When you meet with him tonight, keep things casual. Call him by his name, talk to him, get to know him as a person not as your submissive. Treat him as if he is a close friend and open yourself up to a normal conversation. See if these 'feelings' are worth checking out or if they are because he is one gorgeous man."
I get home about twenty minutes before Edward is supposed to arrive. I let Felix know to expect a delivery from Tang's and that Edward Cullen will be arriving earlier then scheduled. Pulling into the drive and entering the house, I turn on some music and quickly change my clothes. When I enter the kitchen, I grab plates for our orange chicken, bowls for the sizzling rice soup, and cups for the hot tea. I put the water on to boil and pull out the tea. I sit a small pan on the warmer for Saki and warm up enough for two small cups. I manage to get the table all set before Edward walks into the kitchen. He does not drop and kneel, but does keep his eyes to the floor standing feet shoulder width apart with hands clasped behind his back.
"Good evening Edward, have a seat. Dinner will be here any moment. We will talk after we eat. You are not collared right now and I expect you to behave as you would if we were having dinner in public. Since the contract has not been signed yet, I am Isabella right now and while we eat I would like to be casual and have a normal conversation. Afterwards we can get down to business."
I see his whole body relax at my words and before I could comment the doorbell sounds, announcing the arrival of our dinner.
"Edward, please tend to the tea kettle while I get our supper."
Charlotte is right that man is gorgeous and heaven help me, I do have feelings for him. As soon as he entered the kitchen, my whole body was buzzing with current I feel when he is near me. I get the food and sign the slip for the charge with a large tip. Walking back to the kitchen I decide tonight will be different for me. Isabella, the Domme, needs to let Isabella, the woman, take charge tonight. As I walk into the kitchen I send up a silent prayer that I make it through the night.
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First and foremost I want to give a huge shout out to the wonderful AUNT BELL who is my Beta for this story. Thank you for well…FOR...everything.
Thank you to Jess and Lisa for pre-reading and supporting me with encouraging words. It means a HUGE amount to me.
Thanks to Emms and luvrofink….For helping with some wording and ideas.
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My posting schedule will be changing at the request of my Beta to have this story post on Mondays. So in two weeks on Monday I will post the next chapter…if it is read before then I will post ahead of time. Next post will be Monday the 7th of Feb.
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I am writing a Fandom out take for My Sisters 3 to help with the flooding and devastation caused by the flooding. Please watch for further info on this out take.
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Finally….
Thank you so much for reading,
and PLEASE review.
Peace,
TAT~