A/N: My friend said this one to me today and I got an idea, so I wrote another one right away. There's probably gonna end up being a lot of these, because I love nearly every quote I hear :) This one has one-sided romance--Harry likes Severus, and Severus is friendly with Harry, but not necessarily romantic-friendly. It's more about the banter than anything else.

enjoy!

"What a sodding git!" Not for the first time, Ron emerged from the Potions classroom, fuming and having lost a fair few points for his house, which none of his mates appreciated. Harry, rather than being irritated at Snape like Ron, was silently laughing, believing Ron quite deserving of the detention and point loss. After all, when you throw lacewing flies at Professor Snape, declare he is the most annoying git in school, and then blow up a potion, turning yourself blue, what do you expect?

Harry found himself understanding Severus Snape's sense of humor much more recently, and, consequently, his temper as well. Therefore, Harry now knew what was and was not safe to do or say during class. Insulting the Master in his own domain—on the list of things to not do.

"Really, Harry, how can you be attracted to someone so—like him?" Harry threw the redhead a glare, telling him to keep his trap shut. He had not yet told the student body, and he would prefer them to not find out just yet. "I know, but still?" Knowing the idiot would keep talking until Harry said something, he chose to ignore the other teen in favor of speeding ahead to Charms.

It was hardly Harry's fault that shortly after realizing he was gay he had also realized he was attracted to Professor Snape, right? Of course, in Ron's eyes, being gay was completely his choice, not the way he was.

Hermione had been much more understanding, saying whatever he did or was in life, she would accept—being a Death Eater was pretty much the only exception, she claimed.

As if by magic, Severus Snape stepped straight into Harry's path, and, of course, he had not been paying attention.

Somehow, the Boy-Who-Lived managed to make falling to the ground look graceful, or so he was later told. He was too focused on his things scattering across the floor and Snape a mere two feet away.

"Really, Potter, acting once more as though you own the school is not the way to be, wouldn't you say? You always manage to end up on the floor." The intimidating man simply raised an eyebrow as Harry chose to ignore his words. Lately, he had taken to not responding to the biting words, afraid something he didn't want to come out would.

"Turned mute, have we?" Harry looked up, attempting to look passive and unaffected. He desperately wanted to say something, anything, but everything he thought of sounded stupid.

"Nope, just don't want to talk to you, Snape." That one would get him detention for sure.

"No, I just couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't sound stupid, Professor." One way trip to mockery and, possibly, a detention.

"No, just deaf." Had he just said that one out loud? The look on Snape's face informed that yes, yes he had.

"Well then, your lip-reading skills have tremendously improved, Potter. Maybe you should apply the effort you did to that to your studies." And Snape had—NOT—given him detention; the surprises kept coming.

"Just because you're a git doesn't mean I can't do Potions," was what almost came out. What came out instead was—

"But if I did well in Potions, who would you mock?" Was he really bantering with the Professor in the halls for all to witness?

"As we've all just witnessed, Mister Potter, I do believe Mister Weasley would satisfy that position. Do not presume to think you are irreplaceable."

"I know I'm not irreplaceable."

"I am one of a kind, and you know it, Sn—Professor." The Potions Master gave him a secretive grin disguised as a smirk; the man was having as much fun with this as he was.

"Unfortunately, this is true. What would I do without you having the gall to steal from my stores or fall asleep in my class?" Harry was surprised to discover the Professor had a bit of drama in him; he would have done well in a muggle play.

"Rejoice?"

"Perhaps manage to finish grading papers and assignments on schedule."

"Perhaps, Mister Potter. I do believe you are late for your next class; you should pay better attention." And with that, the sinister-looking, quick-witted man turned on his heel and billowed back to the dungeon.

As Hermione was handing him his last book and Ron began commenting on how odd that was and how everyone must be gong daft, he grinned. He was getting better at talking to Snape without losing points or ending up in detention; maybe it wouldn't be such a bad year after all. He heard his name and turned to the direction it was called from.

"Mister Potter, detention tonight after dinner."

Then again, maybe he still needed a little work.

*It is easy to sound smart. Simply think of something stupid to say, then say the opposite.*

PLEASE REVIEW! NO FLAMES! Other than that, I LOVE your opinions!!!