AU. Scott and Chris and the art of pick up lines.

This still takes place in the boarding school universe but disregards the first chapter.

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"Hey Bennet!"

"What is it MacQueen?"

"Are you a magnet? Cuz I'm attracted to you!"

"Really? I was trying so hard to repel you."

-:-

"Baby, your body is a wonderland and I wanna be Alice"

"Go follow the white rabbit somewhere else cuz you're not falling down this hole buddy."

-:-

"Bennet, do you have any raisins?"

"MacLean, I'm trying to enjoy my lunch which as you can see has no raisins,"

"Aww, well then, how about a date?"

"Piss off parasite."

-:-

"Oi Bennet!"

"What is it now?"

"I was so blinded by your beauty that I walked into a locker. I'm gonna need your number for insurance reasons."

"Okay, its 555-No chance in Hell."

"That's just mean man…"

-:-

"Are you as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside?"

"You'll never know that pleasure Christopher."

-:-

"I'm Mr. Right; someone said you were looking for me?"

"I thought you were Mr. Idiot?"

-:-

"That's a nice shirt; can I talk you out of it?"

"Those are some nice lips, can we zip them shut?"

-:-

"I lost my virginity, can I have yours?"

"Can't give what I don't have Chris."

"…Really?"

"There's a reason I don't fall for pick up lines anymore."

-:-

"Hey Scott, did you hear I just became an astronaut?"

"How interesting."

"And my next mission is to explore Uranus."

"I hope you get sucked into a black hole."

"Me too." Wink

"Actually, I hope your ship explodes during take off."

-:-

"I know a great way to work off that pastry you just ate,"

"Me too, running away from you is great exercise."

-:-

"What can I do to make you sleep with me?"

"Magically become someone who isn't a douche."

-:-

"Aw, come on Bennet, give me a smile, it's the second best thing you can do with your lips you know,"

Giggle. "I do know; wanna do the first best thing?"

"…Seriously?"

"Psyche!"

"Not fair dude!"

-:-

"Would you like to try an Australian kiss? It's just like a French kiss, except down under,"

"Even if I was a koala and you were the last eucalyptus on Earth, there's no way Chris."

"Crikey…"

-:-

"If I had a nickel for every time I've seen someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents,"

"Whatever,"

"Hey, that's a blush!"

"It is not!"

"So is!"

"If I give you five cents would you go away?"

-:-

"You look cold; want to use me as a blanket?"

"Nothing about trying to get in my pants?"

"I'm not horny all the time dude…although, now that you mention it…"

"Take your blanket and stuff it MacLean."

-:-

"If I had to choose between breathing or loving you, I would say 'I love you' with my last breath!"

"…Chris,"

"Be quiet Mr. MacLean and pay attention to the lesson!"

-:-

"Hey Chris?"

"Yeah Scott?"

"I bet you $20 I can keep my lips off yours,"

"Based on past experience I know I won't win but sure why not? Dea-Mmph!"

"…I lost."

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Yeah, I just wanted to picture Chris spewing a ton of bad lines…