Hey. Thanks to the people who reviewed my story. I really appreciate those who took the time to do so. So thank you to Mcalison, gizziefan118, and kristen. You guys that review my story really make me happy. I do have to say though, that it is a little discouraging to only have a few reviews. Dont get me wrong, I greatly, greatly appreciate the reviews I get, but I just wish more people would take just a few seconds to tell me what they think. It is, after all, the people who review my story, that keep me going. When people review my story, it makes me want to write. But when I dont get much feed back I have to wonder if theres something that Im just not doing right. I try to make this story as interesting as possible, but I wont know if I'm doing good enough if people dont tell me what they think. So this is part of the reason that I think Im going to take a break from writting this story. Not a long break, but a break. Maybe until after Christmas. Or perhaps until after New Years. I'm not sure how long it will be, but I am also having a serious writters block. I've just come to a spot where I have no idea where I am going with this story. I have certain things planned, and I think I know how I want to end it, but I just dont know how to get there. But anyway, this is why I think I need a break.

Well now that all that has been said, here is chapter 12. I hope everyone likes it, and please take two seconds of your time to review and tell me what you think of my story. Thank you. :-)

Kat

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Chapter 12

Izzie laid in her bed, staring up at the ceiling. She felt exhausted, but for some reason couldn't sleep. She just had so many things that were running through her mind. She was lost in thought, when she heard a soft knock at the door.

"Come in" she called out quietly.

The door opened slowly and George poked his head in.

"Hey, dinner's ready." He said with a smile on his face.

She smiled back weakly, not saying anything.

George sighed and opened the door more and stepped in.

"You're not coming down are you?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

She sighed and shook her head.

"I just don't have the energy George." She said.

"Well do you want me to bring it to you?" he asked.

She sighed, looking at him sadly.

"No, I'm not really hungry. I think I'm just going to try and get some sleep."

George sighed and gave a half hearted smile.

"Alright, I'll let you sleep then." He leaned down and kissed her softly on the head.

He smiled at her before leaving the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

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1 month later

Izzie was sitting on the edge of her bed, trying to muster enough energy to continue getting ready. She had her pants on, but had yet to pull her shirt over head. 'This is ridiculous' she thought to herself. It should not be taking this much out of her, just to get herself dressed. She just didn't know how much more of this she could take.

She was on the last day of her second cycle of treatment, and she just wanted to crawl up on her bed and let death take her. She was dying anyway, why not just let it happen? Why fight fate, right? She shook her head, reprimanding herself. She couldn't let these thoughts take over her. But she couldn't help thinking like that. She just couldn't really see how this chemotherapy was helping. Yeah they said it would give her more time, but was it really worth it? Was all this pain, and tiredness, and lack of appetite really worth it? 'Yes' she told herself. It had to be.

She sighed heavily and stood up to go find a shirt to wear. She picked out a comfy looking t-shirt and put it on. After she finished getting dressed, she grabbed her brush and began brushing through recently washed hair. She was about half way done with her hair, when she glanced down and saw something that she had feared all along.

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George was waiting impatiently downstairs. He knew that it took Izzie longer to get ready these days, but she was going to be extremely late for her appointment. He sighed and went upstairs to check on her. He went into her room to find that she wasn't in there.

"Izzie?" he called out.

He walked out of the room and down the hall to the bathroom. The door was shut and he swore he could hear her crying.

"Izz?" he said quietly through the door.

"Go away George."

He sighed sadly.

"Izzie, what's wrong?" he asked.

"Everything." She said quietly.

He decided to try the knob, hoping she hadn't locked the door. He was glad when it turned and he pushed the door open.

He looked down to see her sitting on the floor with her head in her hands.

"What's going on?" he asked softly.

She looked up at him with a tear stained face.

"I'm falling apart." She whined.

"What?" he asked confused.

"Look" she said, running her fingers through her hair.

When she pulled her hand away from her head, she held it out for George to see. At first he didn't see it, but when he did, he had to quickly hide the shock on his face. There, sitting in her hand, was a clump of hair. He looked up at her head, to see thin patches, where hair had obviously already fallen out.

He looked at her sadly and pulled her into his arms.

"I can't take this anymore." She cried.

He sighed and rocked her back and forth. He wanted to say something to comfort her, but felt at loss for words.

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When Izzie and George finally arrived at the hospital it was already past 11. She was over 2 hours late for her appointment. They spotted Addison as soon as they walked in.

"Dr. Montgomery" George said as he approached her. "I'm sorry we're-"

"Late?" she finished for him, sounding irritated.

"Yes." He said. "We had some problems."

He expression suddenly changed.

"What do you mean?" she asked concerned.

George sighed as he looked at Izzie.

"I'm losing my hair." Izzie said, taking the hat she had on her head off.

Addison almost gasped when she did this. She knew all along that this could happen, but it still seemed to catch her off guard.

"Izzie, this is common for-"

"I know." Izzie said, placing the hat back on her head.

Addison sighed and looked at Izzie sadly.

"Dr. Montgomery, I don't think I can do this chemo anymore." Izzie said, trying to keep herself from crying. "I just feel miserable. It doesn't even feel like its working."

"Izzie, you've known all along that the chemo wont cure your illness." Addison reminded her, hoping Izzie hadn't been –not to be mean, but- stupid enough to think it could cure her.

Izzie nodded. "I know, it's only to make my lengthen my life expectancy." She said. "But honestly, the way it makes me feel-" she paused "I feel miserable. I'm always tired. I never have any energy to do anything. I have no appetite at all anymore. And now this." She said, motioning towards her head. "I just don't think it's worth it." she finished.

Addison sighed, trying to figure out what to say. After thinking for a minute, she came up with something.

"How about we take some tests, and see what the chemo has done so far." She said. "And if we aren't satisfied with the results, then you can quit the treatment." She suggested.

Izzie thought about it for a minute then nodded.

"Okay." She agreed.

Addison smiled.

"We'll have you do the treatment today, since it's the last day anyway, and you can come back for tests tomorrow."

"Okay." Izzie said, not really looking forward to having to have the treatment. "What kind of tests do I have to have done?" she asked.

"I'm going to schedule you for a CT." Addison said. "So that I can get a good look at where exactly the cancer is at."

Izzie nodded and sighed. "Okay. Well then I guess I'll see you tomorrow."

And with that, Izzie headed over to have her last treatment for the month.

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Izzie was sitting there, waiting nervously. 'What was taking Addison so long with the results?' she wondered. She was extremely scared. She truly hated the chemo, but if it was working at all, then she would continue it. Anything to stall what was to come. She was thinking about going to find Addison, when the door swung open.

Addison walked in and sat down across from Izzie.

"Well?" Izzie asked, feeling impatient.

Addison looked at her solemnly.

Izzie stared back at her, suddenly not wanting to know the results. She suddenly wanted to be anywhere but here.

"It didn't work did it?" she asked.

"No, it didn't." Addison said quietly. "You were unresponsive to the treatment."