Ok sorry for the delay in chapters yeah its my fault for your suffering yes I know forgive me :) OK here I will make a flash back for one of my reviewers I love to make these things and you gave me an idea because my mind has been blank as to what I should wright as in a battle scene so without you my trusty reveiwer I wouldn't be wrighting this because my mind has been drawing a blank ok here we go,

I do not own Inuyasha

Kagome's fingers gently ran over the forever embetted scar on her neck wishing that she could go back to the exact night Inuyasha laid it on her neck.

Flashback: Kagome's POV

Today we did something I didn't even think possible. Defeting Naraku took five years of my excistants but I wouldn't give anything away. Even though now that Inuyasha has sprinted off after Kikyo who unfortuently helped us win the battle taking with him the jewel fragments. Who knows what he is off to do? Most likely between turning human for her or making her alive once more which I'm sure would take my live seeing as though a live can not survive without a ful soul or at least half of it and I have almost all of our soul she would have to take my half leaving me dead. Sango and Miroku thinking Inuyasha stayed with me ran off after Kohaku.

Inuyasha didn't even glance back when he sprinted off even though I was being untterly surrounded by miasma left by Naraku's corspe. My skin no burned as my eyes struggled to stay open as I fought my way out of the smoke or at least tried to yet a hopeless effert. I could not see or breath which was making it incressingly hard to move. I coughed and could feel my knees hit the ground, what an insunificant way to die. Not being killed by the enemy himself but mearly by his rotting flesh after you have killed him. In the end maybe Naraku was meant to kill me, maybe Inuyasha was suposed to go to Kikyo and maybe Sango and Miroku were supposed to take Shippo and run just to make sure he was safe.

I could hear faint aproching of foot steps as my eyes shut and someone cursing. Yet before I could see who exatly it was I was very tired and aching from the pervious battle and the recent lack of air so I let myself give into the deprevation of oxegen and pass out.

Someone was hovering over me I could feel it but I didn't dare open my eyes. I whezd most likely because I was still alive but who knows maybe Kami thought it would be in their amsument to make me have my human quilties so much for a perfect peaceful live after death.

"Kagome" I heard somone mutter and I knew the voice of I knew it only too well. Inuyasha who had appreantly come back for me or had been called back by Sango who had found her brother, and in this case knowing Inuyasha and his intense feelings for Kikyo and I only being second best I can only assume that it was the later choice. I cracked my eye open expecting sunlight yet I found only a room lite by a hazy candle flame.

"Are you ok?" He asked draping the stray hair that had slide into my face behind my ear. I coughed slightly after attempting to speak once and finally stuttered out, "I think so". "You scared the shit out of me" Inuyasha muttered as he pured me some water from a jar that lay by my bed. "I mean only you could be killed after the battle by a corspe" He said handing me the small glass. I hadn't noticed before but my clothes were changed, "Did you..?" I choked out he shook his head. "No Keade did" He answered. "Oh" That was all I could say as I let the water flow down my throat. It eased it a bit I hadn't noticed but my lips were extremly dry.

"So why did you come back?" This question seemed to catch him off gaurd. "Huh?" He asked turning back around away from his pervious engagment of trying to pry the Ramon package open. "I was wondering why you came back? I mean weren't you going after Kikyo? Why come back? Did you forget something?" I asked sadly I haven't felt any feelings of hope for quiet sometime. I love him but it became a very obvious fact that he would never choose me over Kikyo so I just as well think of myself as a knock off of the original like when a company makes a baby doll that can move talk and do mayngreat other things then a company trying to make as much money as the first so they make a doll trying to create it like the first but the second can barly keep one eye open. "Yes" He answered my last question. "What was it? Ramon?" I asked letting my heart ack with every word as it did most of the time. "No not ramon" He said as he put down the ramon he had been holding. "Umm I gave you the jewel was there piece missing? Becasue I'm not sure if I have any more" I said he looked at me as I dug around my bag that lay next to me. "Kagome stop" Inuyasha took the bag from me and tossed it to the side. "Well if you forgot something I would like to help you find it or at least know what it is because you would like to leave soon right? I mean isn't Kikyo waiting or something? Speakign of Kikyo why are you here helping me I'm fine now she is probably waiting for you shouldn't you be.." Inuyasha covered my mouth with his hand. My eyes learned how to control my tears and this time only one had excaped but his sensitive nose picked up the suddenly saltiness and quickly stopped me.

"Kagome" He said I looked at him His gaze was intense I wanted to turn away but I couldn't his golden eyes had me locked into a trance. He removed his hand from my mouth but before I could make another comment about Kikyo his lips covered mine. I hadn't any idea what was going on so I went with first instinct to kiss back. I had a million questions floating around my brain, Why had he kissed me? Why had he come back? and many more. I had to breath and obviously so did he he pulled back and held my chin, "Kagome I forgot you. I know that Kikyo is waiting for me and yes I did plan to go back to her after I got some ramon from you because I was already going through with draw syptoms but I saw you. Nearly suicated in the miasma I nearly had a heart attack. I'm selfish I relize that but I just ran off leaving yo alone. I swear in my defense I thought Sango was there or at least coming back and I hadn't thought of the miasma. You looked so sad when you handed me the completed jewel, I hadnt relized until I saw you passed out in the miasma that you were sad because I was leaving you for Kikyo" Oh that hit one of my very hidden nerves. "So why are you still here? Why did you kiss me? You've said it many times proved it to me that you love Kikyo no one else why suddenly do you change your mind? Or was that a pity kiss? Becasue trust me I would have much rather die there then be brought back here and told I was still just second best to something made of dirt and clay. I mean I know I am but really you don't have to say it to my face. You could of perfectly gone on with Kikyo and forgot I ever excisted and I could of died semi peacfully and give Kikyo her soul back and you could have you happily ever after." I said as I pulled my chin from his grasp. I let the tears held back by my brick wall of numbness and let the tears fall in a swift motion down my cheeks. He looked sorta helpless to stop me as I pulled the blankets off and stand up. I was still shaky from the miasma but stable enough to make it out of the door way before I callasped onto my knees sobbing.

I lost my mental stableness aprently, diagnosted clncly depressed by a thrpist and given Depression pills to stop the swift change in mood and one horrible side effect of my pills is that it causes my normal suicidal thoughts to come back ten times as much as it should usually be when I haven't taken them for a day. And today was one of those days, my knees were bleeding I liked it to see that blood trickle. I was still crying I could tell and I was cold shivering. No one was out at this time of night a full moon rest in the sky surounded by stars. I wanted so much to just rip my heart out and make sure I couldn't feel this anymore.

Inuyasha had smelled the blood judging by his face and came out to retreve me. He picked me up the bitterness of how warm I felt in his arms. He carried me inside and dug around for the first aid kit in the bag. "Let me do that" I insisted I really didn't want him to discover what I kept in my first aid kit. He ignored me and found it, He opened it. "Whats this?" He asked showing me a razor with my dried blood on it and the bottle of depression pills and sadly my lovely pills of delight. He didn't seem happy with any of the things he held my arm which was saftly wrappped in my long sleeved shirt and pussed it up. Reveiling my scraed wrist. "Kagome!" If you could see the disappointment in his eyes you would have the acking feeling that you disapointed another person too. I tore my arm away from his grasp along with the first aid kit.

He watched me as I took out the depression pills and open it. "What is that?" He sounded irritable. "Medication" I said how was I to tell him that I was depressed? I mean would he understand that it was his falt or would he blaim me the one who is so very much in pain she can barly kep her eyes open. "What kind?" He growled. I didn't answer, "Answer me!" He said grabbing my arm. I looked at him, His eyes grew darker reder really but he hadn't transformed he was just very angry with me, "Their depression pills". I tore my arm from his once more and took one of the pills, "For what?" He asked he wasn't calm just yet. "My lack of self controll my inabilty to take a tiny ounce of pain or sadness" I answered quietly as I took the last pill and lay back down. "Kagome" I didn't know how much this would upset him but it did. He held my hands to the floor as he staired down at me, "Why would you not tell us?" He growld. "Why would you care?" I asked softly the truth hurt I knew why would he care any way I'm not Kikyo obviously I am not worth the time of day muchless alittle compassion. He reliezed this too and released me, It stung to see him leave the hut and leav me alone.

I got up letting the tears slide freely down my face as I reached for the first aid kit, I popped the clasp open and took out my razor. Nothing goes better with alittle heart break then a little blood. I pulled up my sleeve to where Inuyasha had just been looking and sliced my wrist. It didn't sting anymore just to watch the blood for only a moment made me feel like a ton of bricks had been lifted from my pethetic heart. I let it drip onto my leg and trickle onto the floor as I leaned against the wall.

"Kagome" Inuyasha was back at the door. Probably smelling the blood he came rushing back or maybe he really did forget something important, "Was there something of importance you forgot this time?" I asked looking at the blood once more then wrapping a bandage around my wrist and putting my razor back into the box and closing it. "Kagome" He kneed infront of me pushing a peice of hair from my face, "Yes?" I asked trying to keep my mind off the tiny shred of forgotten hope he came back because he loved me. He hugged me a tight loving hug but as nice as it was I still hated how much it hurt for him to be teasing me, "Kagome" He said nuzzling my neck. "Kagome just let me talk for a minute ok?" He asked I nodded slightly in shock he let go of me and sat next to me his back against the wall. "I went after Kikyo but only because I felt I had too. She gave her live, yes she also has repeatedly tried to kill me and has once almost suceded," Here it comes Kagome I love her not you so go home or something like that, "But if it wasn't for her I'd never be here with you" that was new. "She pinned me to the tree as you remember?" How could I forget pulling the arrow from his chest. "I would like to say she is the one I love and will always love and this would be alot easier" horrible feelings of pain shot through my chest I nearly lost my balance. "But she's not. You are" Huh? "And that wasn't a pity kiss believe me if it wass it would of been shorter" He smiled I looked at him and I was very confused. Was I the one he loved? I don't think he would eever love me so why is he acting like he does. Before I had time to ask if he was joking he had claimed my mouth in another kiss this time it became mroe heated and he had me on my back.

Too Be contuined : )

He he it made my heart hurt writing this but I love stories that do that so cool ok enjoy! I'll have the next one out tomorrow