Synchronous Rotation: Always Facing

Chapter 6

My Immortal, Evanescence, Edward/Bella (For Stephanie Meyer)

There's just too much that time cannot erase

The night passed very slowly for Edward. With Jacob drifting in and out of sleep, he could no longer busy himself downstairs. But after reorganizing his expansive music collection seven different ways, he finally gave into the urge to hunt.

In retrospect, it was the perfect way to pass the time, as it would take Edward hours of stalking and eating to ensure a full stomach. But he knew he could lose himself for those hours and perhaps lose precious time. To compensate, he kept his cell phone with him, which he usually left behind for its own safety. As it was, the only consequence of the excursion was a slightly bloodstained phone and no calls.

It was still early morning when he returned to his home to find Jacob's scent was different. He frowned at the more animalistic smell and wasn't surprised to find a giant wolf now sleeping in the middle of the living room. Jacob was still very much asleep and his dreams were less than pleasant. Edward had seen Jacob sleeping before, but he had yet seen him during such a nightmare.

He listened in for a minute, remembering their conversation from last night. Jacob must have phased, perhaps unconsciously, once the nightmare started in order to save himself some emotional trauma that he would otherwise feel as a human. Edward couldn't hear how Jacob was feeling, but his heart rate was down, even as his muscles were tense. And as it was a nightmare of the memory of his battle with the vampires, he was maintaining himself rather well.

Shrugging, Edward walked over to his piano. He wondered if it would be rude to play and wake the sleeping wolf, or perhaps it would be a favor. It reminded him of the many nights he spent with Bella as she slept. It was very hard for him at first to maintain silence and stillness so she could rest easily. His body could stand to not move for hours, but his mind needed activity. Sometimes he read, but most of the time he contented himself with just inhaling her intoxicating scent.

Well, he couldn't do that with Jacob, certainly when he was currently residing in his wolf form. Edward would much rather sniff a mountain lion than the wolf lying in his living room.

His cell phone broke the silence and Jacob lurched to his feet, only to collapse on one leg. Edward eyed the injured shoulder that was probably broken again from the stress of shifting. But he pushed that aside to answer his phone.

"Bella?" He had to force his voice to a proper volume, his throat was so tight.

She took a moment to answer, breathing quietly. "I have to talk to you."

He closed his eyes, concentrating on not crushing his phone. "I'll be right over."

"No!" She breathed in deeply. "Sorry, but I'd rather not disturb anyone else. Can we meet at your house?"

Edward wondered why she sounded so hesitant, but then he remembered that he hadn't informed her that he was living there again. "Yes, I'm here now," He paused, "and so is Jacob."

Somehow he could tell that her silence was a shocked one. "Jacob? Really?" Her voice suddenly sounded stronger and there was a muffled sound. Edward frowned, wondering if she was laughing.

"It is nothing of consequence," He wondered if she could understand him, his teeth were clenched. "I was just wondering if you would like me to send him away."

"Oh, no. It's fine that he's there. More than fine really," Her voice was lighter now and Edward realized how tense she sounded before. "I'll be right over."

They hung up and Edward looked over to the giant wolf trying to remain standing. He was still very groggy and not putting any weight on his bad leg. 'Bella is coming?'

The vampire nodded, eyeing his leg. "Is your shoulder re-broken?"

Jacob flinched, as if remembering that it hurt. 'Maybe, or I just pulled it.' He clumsily lay himself back on the floor, making the couch and television shudder.

Edward approached. "May I look at it? I wouldn't want Bella to think I've been breaking your bones."

Jacob tiredly lay his head down. 'You have been breaking my bones.'

"Bone."

'Same difference.' He yawn, then whined at the pain.

Edward kneeled down. "I'm assuming you can't shift back, though I would rather look at a human shoulder than a dog's."

'I don't think I can manage. I don't think it's broken again anyway.'

Edward rolled his eyes. "We will see," He reached out tentatively, just realizing that this was the first time he had ever willingly touched a werewolf. Jacob's fur was coarse, but much softer near his skin. His body felt like it was radiating heat and Edward had never before felt how numbingly cold his hands were.

It took a moment to locate the proper bone in the shoulder, Edward had never been to veterinary school. Jacob growled as he touched the sensitive spot, but stayed relatively still. Edward felt carefully around the area, somewhat impressed that the wolf did little than growl and snap at the air. He had read Jacob's mind before as a wolf, but tired and injured, the wolf's instincts were flaring beyond control. Edward knew it was only through the great practice of being a wolf for long periods of time could Jacob keep himself from ripping Edward's arm off.

"It doesn't seem broken to me," He finally assessed, running his hand away from the injury and down the leg. "Though I can't tell for sure. I would recommend not shifting at least until tomorrow."

Jacob sighed, relieved that the examination was done. His eyes were dropping again, exhausted from a long night and a painful morning. 'Looking for something?'

Edward realized he was still running his hand through Jacob's fur, feeling the muscles slowly relax. "I've got an injured, exhausted wolf in my living room, why wouldn't I take the opportunity?"

'To pet me?' Jacob's mind was becoming a bit blurry at the edges. He rolled over to put less pressure on his leg. It also gave Edward a small expanse of stomach to run his hand through.

It was softer there and much warmer. He could feel Jacob's heart beat slowing down until he would eventually fall asleep. He noticed that running his hand along the stomach, Jacob would emit a sound not unlike a purr of a cat. Edward wondered if he had any control over it "No, just examining my enemy," He commented lightly.

Jacob huffed, like he was chuckling. 'Sure, sure' He was rapidly loosing consciousness.

"You know Bella is coming over, don't you want to be awake for her?"

'Hmmm, I know,' He sighed, lying more comfortably and slightly closer to Edward. 'But she wants to talk to you. She'll wake me if she wants me.'

He was gone and Edward wondered about this strange, brief interaction or why his hand was still buried in the soft fur of Jacob's throat. He was becoming disturbingly comfortable with this wolf. If it was thirteen years ago, he would have never tolerated a wolf in Bella's presence, nonetheless his own. Even without wolves in La Push, he avoided their boundaries to ensure he would never meet one.

If he had never left, would he have even let Jacob talk to him? Unlikely, with Bella to protect, he would take no risks around the volatile creatures. Even now he would be very wary around any werewolf besides for Jacob.

"Besides for Jacob," Edward murmured to himself. He gave a small smile as Jacob's mind unconsciously repeated the words, still not in a full sleep. Giving an experimental scratch around Jacob's chin, he felt the massive throat give a soft grunt of pleasure. Edward wondered if Jacob would tolerate this if he was more conscious. It alarmed Edward to think that he probably would.

It was seconds too late that Edward picked up Bella's scent. The wolf's smell was so overpowering, that he completely missed it until she was nearly through the front door. He straightened up quickly, but she had already spotted him from the entry.

"Morning, Edward," She murmured, giving him an unfamiliar smile. It took him a moment to connect it with the way she looked at her daughter. A soft, warm smile. She had never quite looked at him that way before.

He walked to her. "He injured his shoulder in the night. I tended to it so he wouldn't phase back."

She nodded, still smiling. "I'm glad you're helping him," She put a hand on his arm, "Can we go for a walk?" She kept looking to Jacob, obviously not wanting to disturb him.

Edward led her outside to a family path they used to walk so many years ago. And, for that moment of silence, it felt like Edward had never left. Bella wrapped her arm around his and he kept her steady from the uneven ground. He even softly kissed the top of her head and she leaned into him, putting her head on his shoulder.

Despite the familiar embrace, it made Edward's chest ache. He wasn't sure if it was because he knew that is wasn't the same as thirteen years ago, that so many things had changed between them. Or if it was the strange comparison happening in his mind of how Jacob's body was so much warmer than hers.

The house was out of sight before Bella began to speak. "I've been keeping secrets Edward," Her hand tightened on his arm, but her voice was level.

"You've always kept secrets from me," He replied.

She looked up at him, frowning. "I'm sorry-"

He put a finger to her lips, feeling her warm breath. "Anyone whose mind I can't read deserves to keep some secrets."

She looked like she wanted to smile, but it came out as a wince. "But you won't be happy about this one."

The warnings of his family came back in full force and Edward schooled his expression. "Tell me, Bella, and we will find out."

She bit her lip and stared up into the tree tops. "Yesterday wasn't the first time I've been to the doctor's about my headaches," Edward wanted to interrupt with a hundred questions, but he knew it was best to let her speak. "I've been there several times. But most importantly, I went to get a MRI scan a few days before you came into town," Her hand gripped onto his arm so tightly, it was white. "The results were…not good."

She was close to tears and Edward pulled her close, his mind going into dangerous, panicked thoughts. He needed her to keep speaking, but her face was muffled in his shirt and she was slowly creating a damp spot from tears. It took the small eternity of thirty seconds for her to finally lift her head.

"It's a tumor, Edward. They wanted to remove it, but I was so afraid," Edward tried to wipe away the tears pouring down her face, but he couldn't seem to keep up. "They aren't sure how big it is, if it has spread, if it's possible to remove it, or even how long it has been there," She took his hand, simply pressing it to her face. His fingers felt limp and useless. "I didn't know what to do and then you showed up on my doorstep," She gasped, almost choking. "I was…so happy to see you, Edward. So happy. I didn't want to think about it. I didn't want to think about…brain surgery," She looked up at him, her eyes too wet to really focus. "Is that bad?"

He wanted to run a hand through her hair. He wanted to kiss her just like her used to. But she was still holding his hand and he couldn't really feel it. "No, my beautiful Bella, I understand," He didn't know how his voice came out calm. "Can you tell me what you did at the doctor's yesterday?"

His calm voice was working on her and she took a couple of deep breathes. "It was being with you this past week that made me rethink everything. I've seen you so happy and happy for me, I knew I couldn't run from this any longer. I just went to talk about the…options again."

She fell silent again, her eyes moving past his right shoulder. He so desperately wanted to put his hand on her face, but he couldn't seem to lift it. "And?"

Her voice was far away. "I've scheduled a surgery in three days in Port Angeles. He…" She swallowed thickly, "the doctor assured me that this kind of…thing happens all the time. The surgery is common and mostly successful," She began to shake, her eyes still not meeting his. "I'm going to have brain surgery in three days, Edward. I'm going away from home and I'm…so afraid."

His limbs came back to life at her shuddering and he pulled her into his arms again. He held her so tightly, she probably couldn't breathe. But Bella wrapped her arms around him and held on with as much strength as she could. Edward closed his eyes, inhaling her scent. He could never forget it, he would never forget it.

"I'll be there for you," He whispered over and over. "I'll be there for you, even if they try to kick me out. I'll be there for you and I'll be the one to bring you home."

Edward was afraid, more than afraid. His family had warned him of something terrible, this was certainly it. But he knew they wouldn't have been so worried if this turned out to be a false alarm, or if she made a complete recovery. Edward was afraid, because he knew that Bella's fears were about to come true.

The thought drained his strength and he loosened his hold on her. Bella looked up at him, her eyes searching his for conviction, for strength. He knew she didn't find it. "Alice," She whispered.

He didn't understand. "What?"

It felt awful for her to back up a step and suddenly she whirled around. "Alice knows something!" Her voice was louder and desperate.

He took a step forward, but she flinched at the sound. "Bella-?"

"Don't!" She gasped. "Don't look at me or talk to me!" She pressed her hands against her face and Edward could smell the renewed tears. "I can't know how this will turn out. I can't. And you know."

He pursed his lips. "I don't know-!"

"Please, Edward," Her voice was rapidly loosing strength, "You do know something and I can't stand to see anything in your eyes. Just…leave me alone," Her hands dropped, as if she couldn't hold them up any longer. "I need to go home. Don't find me, Edward. Please don't find me."

She was walking away and Edward wanted to take her and shake her until she understood that he didn't really understand. But he remained still, because he did know something. He knew he would only stay for fifteen days. Only two more weeks.

Edward had to stop himself from think about the ever dwindling list of outcomes of Bella's surgery. A large pine tree took the effort and it was only after he carefully shredded the fifty foot tree from root to tip did he trust himself enough to think again.

He had to leave. He had to leave now. There was no way he could sit around his house for three days without going completely insane. Or thinking of horrible conclusions from this surgery. He would find the one he feared the most and he would have to kill himself to rid the thought.

Edward was walking, and then running. He was sprinting through the trees, going away and away. Not to North Dakota, perhaps not even as far as the Canadian border. But he needed t leave Forks, he needed to loose himself for a time.

A large, russet wolf tackled him from the side. Edward growled, wrapped his arms around the fleshy neck, ready to twist the head off. But he couldn't do it, he could hear Jacob's panicked thoughts.

'Edward! Don't! Please listen to me!'

The vampire didn't loosen his hold, but felt his head collapse into the soft fur. The blood pumped quickly next to his ear. "I can't be here…I need to go," He whispered.

'You said fifteen days, didn't you?' The voice was desperate.

Edward managed to relax slightly. "Yes, I did. I'm not leaving, I will be back in three days."

Jacob's mind was a flurry of thoughts and images. Bella had just told him the news as well and he hadn't the time to take it in like Edward. The horrible news and the sprint to catch Edward before the border was enough to suddenly crush the wolf and Edward found himself holding a shivering, naked human.

Jacob fell to his knees, clutching his injured shoulder. It was probably re-broken from the run. But only his unconscious seemed to noticed, his eyes were broken, staring at Edward. "Why are you going?"

Edward still had his arms around Jacob's shoulders, unable to let go yet. "My family warned me."

"But you said they weren't specific! What if you are overreacting!" Jacob was sounding more hysterical and Edward found himself running a hand through the other man's hair, as he had wanted to do with Bella. The gesture calmed both of them.

"Pray that I am, but I still can't be here for three days. I will return and nothing will be in my control," He didn't feel like he was even there. He felt like he was dreaming and drifting away.

He could tell Jacob wanted to grab his arm and keep him there. But Jacob was injured and drained. "You said you wouldn't forsake me," He pleaded.

Edward remembered his words from so many days ago. He let his hand slide down to Jacob's chest, feeling the strong heart beneath his palm. "Your heart still beats," He said by way of explanation. "And your blood will continue to flow until I return."

Jacob leaned forward, pressing Edward's hand more firmly against his chest. But that was not his intention, as the vampire read his thoughts. Later Edward would wonder why he didn't move away, as Jacob leaned forward to kiss him.

It was as soft as the smile Bella gave to him that morning, and that thought alone made Edward remain still until Jacob pulled away. The man's breaths were hot on his face and his scent was something Edward could have never figured out. "I have considered you, Edward Cullen. And if you can think of nothing else for three days, consider me."

Then Edward left, the strange scent of Jacob Black still on his lips.