This might be the weirdest chapter I have ever written.

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Winter boots, hats, scarves and mittens, blocked the front door; had she been thinking she would have known that Daisy was having a sleepover.

The master bedroom was empty. She glanced at the rumbled sheets. She wanted nothing more then to cocoon herself in bed and get lost in the soft warmth and simply sleep.

She stripped naked.

She pulled on one of Geoffrey's t-shirts and a pair of boxer shorts; clenching the soft cotton in her fists, she brought it to her face and inhaling the clean scent of laundry detergent.

Tears burned the corners of her eyes, but she was too exhausted to cry.

She felt dullness; inside and out.

The tile of the kitchen floor was cold against her bare feet. She didn't realize that she was crying until she saw Geoffrey slowly putting down his crossword and pencil and cautiously moving towards her.

She cried.

Her arms wrapped around herself protectively. Geoffrey's arms encircled her again, tightly, her forehead pressed against his chest.

"What happened?"

Addison inhaled sharply. She was sitting at the kitchen table, her chair turned to face Geoff's. He was leaning close to her, trying to see her face, pushing her hair away from her eyes, his palm rubbing her thigh trying to calm her down.

"Did something happen with the twins?"

She shook her head, her fingers twisted and knotted together tightly.

"Addison," Geoffrey cupped her cheeks with his palms, "Honey, what's wrong?"

"I…" she was shaking slightly, "I had to admit Meredith. She's having severe complications," she whispered, "Her baby… I …"

Geoffrey reached over and wrapped his hands around hers, "Her baby is Derek's baby."

"Yeah," she looked up in surprise,

He nodded and stared at their hands.

"It's Derek's baby," she repeated softly.

They sat silently.

"I just," she brushed a few tears away from her eyes, "what if I can't do anything?"

"You can."

"What if it's not enough?"

"Addison…"

"He's always wanted children. And now… What if I can't do anything? What if…" she fell silent for a long time, "I can't do this."

"You can."

"It's Derek's baby. Derek's baby. He's… I can't take away his chance to be a father. I still…"

"You love him."

Addison looked up in surprise.

"Addison. It's okay. He's your friend. You want him to be happy. And you have history with him. You shared a life with him."

She nodded, "We were happy. Most of the time. Until we weren't," she pulled away slightly, "It just got to hard to be together. We never should have gotten married. We were too... what we had was amazing, and we were so in love, but we didn't know how to be together when we weren't happy. We didn't know how to fix our problems. We just knew how to be in love and how to hurt each other. And then it was to late," she winced, "But we really loved each other." Using the palms of both hands she wiped the tears from her cheeks, "I know that things are better this way. We had to let each other move on and be happy. But it's just… hard, I want him to be happy and I don't think I can do it."

"So use that. Use that too help that baby."

She smiled gratefully, "I love you," she leaned forward and brushed her thumbs over his stubbly cheeks, "You get that right? That I love you? And that I don't know what I would do without you, because you are so good for me. Without you…"

"You'll never be without me. Ever."

"Good. Because I belong with you. I need you."

XXXX

The lights were off, the door was closed and the curtain was drawn around the bed.

She lay curled on her side staring absently at the alternating pink, white and blue strips of the curtain. The room was silent except for the regular beeping of the fetal monitor and the quiet crunch of paper as it steadily printed out the results. The chair he sat in was soft and overstuffed; he rested on the very edge –– his arms were outstretched, hands covering her stomach and his forehead resting on the bed. Her hand rested in his hair. Occasionally their eyes met, but they were too scared to do anything except be silent.

XXXX

"You have 2 choices," Mark sat down beside Derek and swung the wheeling bassinet around to rest in front of them.

"Sydney lets you wander around the hospital with them? Unattended?" Derek asked dull-ly.

"I do not take orders from my wife, I can do what ever I want with my daughters," Mark shot back, "Besides. She's asleep."

Derek rubbed his hands over his red eyes.

"So, do you want to hold the sleeping one, or the quiet one?"

"Wouldn't the sleeping one be quiet?"

"Not if she wakes up. Then she's the crying one."

"I'll take the quiet one then."

They sat there in silence rocking the babies.

"Which one is this," Derek asked quietly.

"The quiet one."

Derek smiled slowly, "I mean what's her name."

"I'm not sure," Mark didn't take his eyes off the baby in his arms, "There's a 50 percent chance you are holding Roxie."

"You don't know which one is which?"

"They are identical. And 11 hours old," he lowered his voice, "When we get them home Syd is going to paint their toenails. She doesn't know who is who either." He glanced at Derek's baby, "I'm pretty sure that's Roxie."

Derek gently untangled the baby's tightly swaddled blanket and examined the ID bracelet on her ankle, "Beatrix Robyn."

"Trixie was my second guess."

"Your daughters are going to grow up to be strippers."

"My daughters are going to be librarians or judges or marine biologists."

They lapsed into silence again.

"How's Meredith?" Mark asked gently.

Derek shook his head and blinked hard "We don't really know anything yet. Addison's probably in with her now."

Mark nodded, "You should be with her."

Derek didn't respond.

"Derek, sometimes you are even more passive aggressive then Addison is. If she is going to be Meredith's doctor you can't avoid her just because you had a fight."

"We aren't fighting."

"Derek," Mark shook his head, "You need to be with Meredith right now. Screw Addison. She's just the doctor. This is about Meredith and your baby. Be the bigger person and pretend that Addison doesn't exist. You've done a pretty good job of it in the past. I'm sure you can do it again."

"She left me."

"So you and Meredith could have a life together with your baby," Mark gave him a look, "You've left her before to be with Meredith, forgive her if she thinks that's what you wanted."

"I told her it wasn't. I said that we could figure it out."

"You told her that before too," Mark placed his still sleeping infant back in the bassinet and reached for the other, "Derek, buddy, you need to take a few minutes and take a look at where your priorities need to be."

XXXX

"I have some of your labs back," Addison held up a stack of papers as she walked into Meredith's room.

"What's wrong with my baby?" Meredith wiped her cheeks with the tips of her fingers, she had clearly been crying.

"I don't know."

Meredith sighed heavily and wrapped her arms around her tummy.

"Where's…" Addison inwardly cringed, "Where's Derek?"

"He went to get coffee and he never came back," her eyes once again brimming with tears.

"Do you want me to wait until he gets back or…"

Meredith nodded, a sob catching in her throat.

Addison nodded, "Do you have other questions???"

Meredith's face contorted and she blinked quickly to hold her tears in check, "Is it a boy or a girl?"

Addison's eyebrow shot up.

"I don't want to call my baby 'it' anymore."

"It's a girl," Addison told her softly.

"Julie," Meredith whispered.

"That's pretty."

Meredith nodded. She tugged at her hospital gown, pulling it up over her tummy and tracing her fingers over the tight skin.

"Does she move around a lot?" Addison asked, reaching for the chart.

Meredith nodded, "She kicks," she traced a slow circle, "That's a foot," she inhaled deeply, her slight frame still trembling, "I've been laying here all morning trying to figure out exactly what she's up to in there. Her feet are over here, I can feel them tapping," she tapped her fingers gently against her skin, "I should have known there was something wrong, she should be kicking harder by now."

"Meredith," Addison placed a hand on top of hers – it was the first time they had ever touched, "How could you know?"

"I'm her mother, I should have known that there was something wrong," Meredith sighed – her eyes still shined with tears, "I think her hands are over here," she smiled, moving her fingers over a few inches, "Every once in awhile I just … feel something there. Like a little flutter I guess. I've spent all morning just… feeling her; trying to be more aware of her."

"That's good," Addison assured her softly, "Mom's always know more than even the best machines. You can let us know if you feel anything different."

Meredith nodded, "She's going to be good. We have a deal."

"I'm back," Derek stepped hesitantly through the door. He avoided Addison's eye and stepped over to Meredith's side and rested a hand on her knee.

Meredith looked to Addison with wide wondering eyes.

"Okay," Addison took a death breath, "It looks like a problem with your placenta. Your ultrasounds are telling us that it's not really where it should be and that along with these tests we are running have told us that the baby isn't getting enough nutrients. So we are monitoring that."

"Oh God," Meredith covered her face with her hands.

Addison glanced at the monitors, "Okay Meredith," she took a step closer, "I need you to take a few deep breaths. Ok? Another problem is that your blood pressure has been really high and it's not good for the baby," Addison spoke calmly "I know you're worried, but the best thing you can do is relax."

Meredith nodded vigorously, inhaling deeply and shakily.

"Okay," Addison stepped back again, "We are also watching the baby's heart," she eyed Meredith carefully, "The heart rate is lower than we would like it to be and I'm worried that if it gets any lower than the baby is going to go into distress and we are going to have to deliver early. So it's really important that the baby feels calm."

"There is something wrong with the baby's heart?" Meredith asked breathlessly as she reached for Derek's hand.

"We don't know that for sure. We are still running more tests."

Tears started running down Meredith's face.

"Meredith," Derek soothed.

"I'm… okay," she choked out, her breathing becoming shallower "I'm… I'm trying… I…" She gasped and sobbed, clutching her stomach tightly. The monitors started to beep loudly and Meredith struggled to breath deeply as tears streamed down her cheeks.

"Meredith," Addison touched Meredith's shoulder, "Meredith your blood pressure is going up, you have to calm down." Addison reached for the oxygen mask, praying it wasn't to late to prevent what looked to her to be a panic attack.

"Ohhh," Meredith groaned loudly, clutching her side.

"Damnit," Addison turned quickly to check the monitors.

"Meredith, was that a contraction?" Derek murmured.

Meredith shook, her eyes wide with fear.

"Meredith," Addison repeated, "If you don't calm down now the baby is going to go into distress."

"Was that a contraction?" Derek asked Addison quietly, his eyes big with worry.

Addison nodded.

"Meredith," Derek gripped her hand hard, "Take a deep breath ok. Just breathe."

"Damnit," Addison turned to Derek, "The baby's heart rate plummeted and Meredith's blood pressure is spiking. If she has anymore…"

"Then what?" Derek demanded.

Addison gave him a look but didn't reply.

"Then what?"

Meredith's sobs intensified; she gripped Derek's hand harder, vainly trying to prevent the sobs from escaping while fighting the fear that was intensifying by the moment.

"Meredith, calm down," Addison ordered.

"Mer, it's ok," Derek ran his hand over her hair, "It's ok."

"Ohhhhh," Meredith cried out.

"Shit," Addison glanced at her watch then hit a button on the wall.

"What are you doing," Derek demanded, "What's going on?"

"We need to deliver the baby now," Addison grabbed various things around the room as people started rushing in, "Meredith," Addison spoke loudly, "Your having contractions. If we wait or try to stop them then it's going to put too much stress on the baby, okay? You're going to have the baby now."

"What? No! It's too soon," Derek protested.

"We don't have a choice Derek," Addison said dismissively, she turned to the anesthesiologist that rushed in from the room next door, "General anesthesia," she instructed.

"General!" Derek exclaimed, "Is that necessary?"

"Derek," Addison touched his arm to move him out the way but he wouldn't move.

"No."

"She needs this Derek. If she doesn't calm down then this is only going to get worse."

"The baby…"

"I am going to have that baby out before…"

"No," Derek shook his head, "No."

"Derek!" Addison argued.

"I think that maybe we should consult with someone else…"

"Are you kidding me?"

"I don't think that it was a good idea that you be Meredith's doctor. Obviously you are to close…"

"Derek! Right now you are either helping me or in my way."

"I want someone else…"

"Oh, don't do that. Don't you dare try to say that I am not doing everything to save your daughter. If anyone is going to kill themselves saving her you better damn well believe that it is going to be me."

"Daughter?"

"It's a girl. Congratulations."

XXXX

Complete silence.

Around her was the usual hustle and bustle, but in her head it was completely calm and serene. She made each cut, each movement with textbook precision. She was utterly and completely focused.

"Derek," She said softly, calling him to her side, "In about 45 seconds I'm going to deliver your daughter," she told him calmly, "When I hand her to you take her straight to the team, tell her you love her, and step back and let them work. Okay?" She glanced up quickly to see him nod. "Okay." She slid her hand carefully under the baby's neck and firmly tugged her out. She cradled the baby against her chest for a moment, her eyes traced over the baby's dark hair and delicate features, she smiled and turned to Derek.

Their eyes met for a long moment as they carefully maneuvered the baby from her arms to his. He stood there motionless for a moment, staring at his daughter, and then looked back at Addison – his eye's full of tears.

"I'm a father."

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I'm not really one to beg for reviews, but if you don't give me TONS of feedback I am never writing again.

Awwwwwww McBaby.