Hey, guys. I'm terribly sorry for the delay. I hope this chapter is worthed for your waiting :)

Thank you to my beta, xx-twilight7-xx (Anita) for beta'ing the chapter. She will spend her holiday in Vanuatu. Let's hope she will have a great time there ^^

This is chapter 12.

[Previously]

He leaned closer to me rendering me still. Edward paused a few inches from my face and our lips were nearly touching. My breathing turned shallow and my stomach knotted. "Bella..."

"Edward!"

Edward quickly put distance between us while I still sat there with a stunned expression. What just happened? Did he try to...kiss me?

"Bella? What are you doing in here?"

I blinked several times and slowly turned my head to see Carlisle standing at Edward's door. "Oh...I...uh...wanted to...meet you, but I saw Edward and then he invited me in," I answered breathlessly.

Carlisle raised his eyebrows.

I cleared my throat. "Can I see you now?" I asked him.

Carlisle nodded.

I slowly stood from Edward's bed while Edward followed my movements with his eyes. I smiled and took one of his hands. I placed the colourful cube gently in his hand. "Tell me when you finish this," I said to him.

Edward smiled and held my hand which still held the cube. "I will."

I smiled back and slowly pulled my hand from his. I glanced to Edward briefly before I walked out of his room.

Chapter 12

Two Options

I followed Carlisle to his office, half-dazed. What just happened? Did Edward seriously want to kiss me? And why would I let him kiss me? My heart sped up when I remembered his face inches from mine. I still could feel his warm breath on my face and his masculine scent. My stomach knotted. Something strange happened to my body when I remembered our closeness.

"Please, have a sit," Carlisle's voice broke my daydreaming.

I shook my head lightly and sat on the chair opposite his desk. The blond man sat down in his chair and smiled timidly at me. "It's very nice to talk to you again, Bella. Kate told me that you've been busy with Margaret these days."

I nodded slowly. "Yes, I am, Carlisle. I'm impressed with her progress. Actually that was one of my reasons for wanting to talk to you."

Carlisle nodded back. "Carry on."

I took a deep breath. "I don't know if Kate had already told you about this or not, but I want to take Margaret out for a while. There's a festival next week at one of high schools here and I plan to take her there."

Carlisle studied me briefly before sighing. "Margaret's progress is amazing. I agree with you. But, she is still in intensive care. Do you think it's wise to take her out from this place?"

"I've talked to her a lot, Carlisle," I said to him. "She has lots of plan for her future. As a Psychology student, I've never met someone who could do that. Especially not in her case."

"You have only seen one case, Bella," Carlisle shot back. "You haven't seen enough to make any professional judgments."

"Maybe I haven't," I answered him. "But, I see enough in one person."

Carlisle stared at me with his blue eyes and then he sighed again. He chuckled lightly. "You could be one damn good psychologist, Bella. I won't be surprised if you end up in one of the best mental care facilities in the States."

I blinked. Wow, did he just compliment me? Well, if you called that a compliment. "Um...thank you?"

Carlisle chuckled, seeing my dumb founded expression. "You have my permission, Bella. I'll talk to Kate about that and I think it'll be the best way if you talk Margaret too. I'm sure she will be happy to hear about your plan."

I smiled. "I hope so."

"So," Carlisle folded his arms on the desk. "How's my son?"

I knew he would ask that.

"He's doing fine," I answered shortly.

Carlisle raised his eyebrows and then leaned in his chair. "I can see that. And I can see how much he smitten by you."

Huh?

I searched Carlisle's face while he smirked. "I...I never-"

"Of course, you never had any thoughts about that, Bella," he interjected. "I'm sure you know you can't be romantically and emotionally involved with your subject."

I knew he was right, but I also knew the meaning behind those words. He wanted me to stay professional, no matter how Edward looked at me. I took a deep breath. "Believe me, Carlisle. I know that better than anyone. But, don't you think it's also Edward's right to decide?"

Carlisle sighed desperately. "Bella, you've already seen him. Don't you think it will break his heart when he knows you don't return his feeling?"

I blinked several times.

Carlisle stared at me deeply. "I don't want him to fall for a second time."

I clenched my jaw. I've dealt with this kind of parenting before. The parents who think they know everything about their child. "No, Carlisle," I said to him. I could feel anger slowly build in my body. "You just don't want to see your pride wounded for the second time."

"What did you just say?"

I stared back at him. "I know you care so much about your job...so much and then you forgot what the most important thing to you is. Your family. Have you ever thought that maybe it's not Edward that needs help but you?"

"That's enough, Miss Swan. You have no right to speak like that in my office. You know nothing about my family," he said sternly.

"I know enough about your family, Dr. Cullen," I said back. I knew he could expel me from this place and I wouldn't get the chance to say goodbye to Margaret or even Edward, but I wanted to say what I wanted to say. "I don't have to possess great hearing in this place. You have a great family, but everything changed when you didn't pay enough attention to them. Have you ever thought about your wife or maybe your sons? Have you-"

"That's enough, Miss Swan," he cut my words with an angry expression. "I want you to get out of my office. As for Margaret, I will give you permission to take her out. And as for Edward, I suggest you remember what I said earlier."

I looked at him sadly and stood from my chair. I slowly walked to the door and turned around to face him. I saw Carlisle still sitting there, his eyes trained on the desk in front of him.

"Your sons love you," I said slowly to him. "You should know that. Even if you didn't, I want to be the one to tell you. Good day, Dr. Cullen."

I turned around and walked out from his room. I stopped in front of Edward's room and I heard loud music from inside the room. I smiled slightly and continued to walk to see Margaret.


"Hey, Bella," Margaret greeted me when we met at the main hall. I had just talked with Kate, minus telling her about my conversation with Carlisle and she said she would prepare for Margaret's day out. There was some administration which I had to fill before I could take her out. Mostly to protect both of us if something bad was to happen. Although Margaret had not misbehaved before, all the staffs didn't want to take the chance.

I smiled and sat on the chair next to her. "Hey, how are you? Sorry for not being around lately."
Margaret shook her head. "It's alright. I understand, though."

I smiled again and nodded. I gestured to the thick book in front of her. "What are you reading?"

"Oh," Margaret looked slightly towards the book cover and then opened the page again. "Just an inspirational book."

I nodded thoughtfully. "It's a good thing you want to read those kinds of books."

She shrugged. "Yeah, well...with endless time in front of me in this place, I can read all the books that I want."

I took a deep breath. Alright, I guess this is time to tell her about my plan. "Well, about that...I have a plan for the both of us."

Margaret's eyebrows shot up. "A plan? What kind of plan?"

"I was thinking about taking you out to a high school festival next week," I said to her carefully.

Her eyes lit up. "Really?"

I laughed lightly. "Yes, really."

Suddenly she jumped from her chair and hugged me fiercely. Some of the kids and other volunteers stared at us curiously. I laughed breathlessly and patted her back. "Well, I'm glad you like the plan."

"Like it? Are you kidding me? I love it," she exclaimed and leaned away from her embrace.

"How did you gain permission?"

I grinned. "I have my ways."

Margaret giggled and then frowned immediately. I looked at her curiously. "Margaret, what is it?"

She sighed. "Are you sure I will be able to go out? I mean...it's been a long time since I met with other people outside of Our Hearts."

I took a deep breath and smiled. It was a common thing for people like her to be worried about not being able to adapt in public. But, it was also important for her to build her self esteem among people. I mean, how could she live outside this place if she was still thinking she was not worthy? "What do you think? Do you think you can meet other people outside this building?"

Margaret twisted her fingers nervously. "Well...I don't know. I want to, but..."

"But what?" I asked her gently.

She sighed. "I'm afraid of what people think of me."

I raised my eyebrows. "And what would that be?"

"Well...that I'm mentally unstable and I'm not worth anything..." she answered sadly.

I smiled. "Do you really think that way about yourself?"

She nodded slowly.

"Let me rephrase the question for you. Do you really think that way about yourself or do you think about yourself that way because of what other people think about you?" I asked her again. This was a 'words game', as I called it, sometimes effective for building self esteem. Well, most of the time.

She didn't answer me.

I patted her shoulder gently and she looked at me. I smiled timidly. "Everything that you think about yourself is in here," I tapped my temple. "But, the only one who knows who you really are...from here and here." Again, I tapped my temple and then my chest, showing her that we couldn't forget where our heart is.

Margaret blinked.

I leaned back in my chair and folded my arms to my chest. "I will leave it to you to make the decision. You still have time until next week." And then, I grabbed my bag from the floor. "I'll be at the corner," I told her. "I need to do something with my project."

She still didn't answer me.

I stood from the chair and chose the table in the corner of the room. I sat down and sighed. The chance was fifty-fifty for Margaret to accept my invitation. Even if she didn't accept it, it wouldn't affect my project immensely. But, as a friend, I wish she would accept my invitation. I pulled out my notes and my pen from my bag. I started to write my project and how the best way was to get my conclusion. And then from the corner of my eyes, I could see Edward walk through the garden and sat down in the green grass. He looked so deep in thought. I stopped writing and looked at him. I saw him purse his lips and stare at the Rubik cube in his hand. I chuckled lightly and stopped writing to look at him. His expression sometimes changed from confusion to desperation and sometimes he scratched his head. I laughed lightly.

As always, he seemed to know when I was looking at him and then he raised his head. Our gaze met and my breath hitched in my throat. His eyes were so deep, like trying to see into my soul. Suddenly Carlisle's voice rang in my mind: I'm sure you know you can't become romantically and emotionally involved with your subject.

I quickly looked back at my notes, trying to hide from his stares. I wrote random things, nothing to do with the topic of my project. I should have thought about what Carlisle said. I didn't want to hurt Edward. He was already hurting, but I couldn't just stay away from him. It will hurt him more. I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. What should I do now? Should I just end my volunteer programme at this place?

"Um...Bella?"

I raised my head and looked at the person in front of me. Margaret stood with a nervous expression. I smiled. "Yes?"

She chewed her bottom lip and smiled timidly. "I would like to go with you to the festival next week."

I still didn't find the answer for my questions until lunch time was over. My time to assist Edward followed lunch. I tried my best to keep neutral, but it didn't fool him.

"Bella? Is there something wrong?" Edward asked me.

"Huh?"

"You have been looking at the same page for 15 minutes," he pointed to my book. I borrowed it from Margaret before lunch to distract me while I assisted Edward. "I don't think the page is too long for you to read for 15 minutes," he continued.

I blinked. "Ow...well, I was trying to understand what this book was about."

Edward raised his eyebrows. "I can see that."

I sighed and closed the book. It wasn't working anyway. "I'm sorry. I just have a lot to think about lately." Not to mention my conversation with his father.

Edward studied me briefly. "Is it something to do with my dad?"

My head shot up. "What?" Did he hear what Carlisle and I discussed earlier?

He narrowed his eyes. "I'm sure it is. You are a terrible liar, Bella." He leaned closer to me while I sat there nervously. "What did my dad say to you?"

I unconsciously shook my head. "Nothing...he said nothing."

"It's bullshit!" he shouted at me. "I'm going to tell you something, Bella. He is always like this, every time I get even the slightest chance to recover, he always ruins it for me. First, my mom and then Emmett...and now you! This time I won't just sit back and watched all the people that I cared about avoiding me, especially you."

I gasped.

Edward's gaze turned smoldering and he cupped my face with his hands. "I know you like me, Bella. I can see that. I can also see you that are torn between two options, either you are to avoid me to prevent me from hurting or stay close to me and return my feelings."

W-what? My...my...who's the Psychologist here?

I swallowed hard. Think something up, Bella. Come on...

"My time is almost up, Edward," I answered him as coherent as I could. His scent had already made me dizzy. "After next week, I will focus on my project and I won't stay here any longer." It was the best excuse that I could make. As much as it was painful for me to say, it was already in my head.

He looked at me with a shocked expression.

I used the opportunity to compose my face. "It's not about your dad, Edward. Like you said before, you asked me to be my subject. When the time is over, I have to go leave this place." I felt my heart bleed like it had been stabbed by a knife. It was a complete lie. I already felt bound to these kids.

"Is that true?" Edward asked me again. His face turned expressionless.

I quickly nodded. "I don't want to be involved with my subject emotionally. It's not allowed."

He snorted. "Not allowed? You have got to be kidding me."

"No, I'm not."

Edward chuckled darkly. "So, that's it? You're going to leave me just like that?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat, fighting the tears from my eyes. I knew better than anyone that he was back to square one and there was nothing I could do.

"Yes," I answered shakily.

Edward clenched his jaw and then suddenly he rose from his chair. He walked from the room where we had our session and I just stared at him.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.


I went home feeling very exhausted. I couldn't remember when I had last felt this exhausted. I ignored Alice in our room and she knew I just wanted to be left alone. She was busy picking up her clothes, perhaps for her date with Jasper when I lay on my bed that night.

I woke up in the morning with Alice humming some random tunes while she was worked on her sketches. She smiled when she saw me.

"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty," she greeted me.

I groaned and lay on my back. "What time is it?"

"It's almost half past eight in the morning. You should get ready if you don't want to be late," Alice said again.

I sighed and sat on my bed. "I'm not in the mood to arrive early this morning."

Alice furrowed her eyebrows. "That's strange. Usually you never want to arrive late to Our Hearts."

I shrugged. "Well...things changed."

She looked at me briefly and smiled timidly. "You know something, Bella...when Jasper asked me on a date, I knew he was serious at that time."

I raised my eyebrows. "O...kay..."

"I didn't answer him immediately because I was thinking about you," Alice went on.

I blinked. "Huh?"

"You told me before about Rosalie. How you didn't feel comfortable around her. I mean...how can I have a relationship with someone who could make you uncomfortable? It was selfish," Alice said again.

Wow.

"And then, I made a decision. Well...actually a decision between two options."

My eyes widened. I never believed in supernatural things before, but this time I believed that Alice had the gift of premonition.

My best friend smiled knowingly. "My decision is...I will still date Jasper while I try to be a filter between you and Rosalie. I guess that won't make sense, though."

Two options...I had that too, but I didn't have my decision yet. Could I help Edward as my subject and maybe...returning his feelings?

"You know what's best for you, Bella. Don't let others decide for you," she whispered.

I took deep breaths. And then, I saw Alice stand from her chair and put her notes in her bag. "I promised I'd go shopping with Rosalie. I'll see you later, Bella." She grabbed her bag and walked out from the room, leaving me with my thoughts.

I lay back on my bed, thinking what Alice had just said. Her decision was a win-win solution. She could still make people from opposite sides get along, even if it may not be too well. Maybe I could do it too. For myself and for...Edward.

I quickly got up from my bed and took my shower. I changed my clothes and prepared my bag in a flash. I arrived at Our Hearts ten minutes late, but I didn't care. I wanted to see Edward and tell him about my decision. Once I parked my old truck in the parking lot, I got out and half ran to the main building where Carlisle's office and Edward's room were supposed to be. I walked through the stairs and then stopped in front of Edward's room. I just raised my hand to knock when suddenly I heard loud voices from Carlisle's office.

"I just want you to be happy, Edward," I heard Carlisle said.

"Happy? You are trying to make me miserable. What did you say to Bella?" This time it was Edward's.

My heart sped up when I heard him say my name. I slowly walked to Carlisle's office and stood next to the door.

"I told her to stay professional. She knows better than to not become involved with her subject."

I heard Edward scoff. "She never thinks of me as her subject and she doesn't think that way about Margaret either."

I stopped breathing. How much did he know about me?

"That's why I know she is different," Edward continued. "That's why I like her."

I took deep breaths and leaned my head on the wall. Gosh, everything is messed up now.

"She won't stay in this place any longer than two weeks," Carlisle answered with flat voice.

"That is not her decision," Edward shot back with anger. "Why did you do that, Dad? Don't you want to see me happy? Or you just don't care anymore about me, mom and Emmett?"

"That's enough, young man!"

"No, I won't! What is wrong with you, Dad? I want to be the son that you're proud of, but you never look at me."

"I said that's enough!"

I furrowed my eyebrows. I had feeling this conversation won't end well.

"You are so selfish. You just think about yourself, about your career, about-"

There was a loud thud and the sound of someone falling to the floor. My eyes widened and without thinking, I quickly got into the room. I couldn't believe what I could see. Edward was on the floor with bleeding lips while Carlisle stood over him with his fist clenched. I gasped and quickly approached Edward.

"Edward, are you alright?" I asked him.

"What are you doing here, Miss Swan? Are you eavesdropping?" Carlisle asked me.

I turned my head slowly and stared at his eyes. "It's hard not to eavesdrop with your loud voice, Dr. Cullen."

Carlisle narrowed his eyes and composed himself. "Your behavior is getting annoying, Miss Swan. I will ask you to leave Our Hearts in two weeks."

"I told you, Dad. It's not your decision," Edward said to his father with venom in his voice.

"This is my place. I have rules."

Edward narrowed his eyes and suddenly he stood from his position. Before I could think, he hit Carlisle's face with his fist. I gasped and grabbed Edward's arm.

"Edward, stop it!"

"No!"

"Edward, control yourself!"

"Don't tell me what to do, Bella. You don't care about me!" he shouted at me.

"Yes, I do!" I said to him without thinking.

Edward scoffed. "I've heard lots of lie before. I don't believe you."

My heart clenched. What could I do to make him believe me? What could I do to make him see the decision from my two options? One thing I did know... I like him and I would like to return his feelings if he let me. Without thinking, I did something which I could only think of doing.

I kissed him.

Ooh laa laa...

I hope you guys could wait patiently until next week for the update :) Happy Thanksgiving to my readers from the States :)

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