Chapter 22 is here! ^^

Chapter 22

Esme Cullen

I didn't see Edward and Tanya's family again after my breakdown. He quickly held my hand and escorted me to my bedroom. After giving me a good night kiss, he left me in my room. I sighed, grabbed my bag and pulled out a T-shirt and pajama pants. I tiptoed along the way from my room to he bathroom and quickly took a shower and brushed my teeth. When I was done, I tiptoed my way back to my room before I heard voices from the living room.

"What is your intention towards Bella, Edward?" I heard a female's voice asked Edward. Perhaps it was Esme.

"I want to be her something, Mom. I love her," Edward answered.

My heart sped up and I leaned myself on the wall. I didn't mean to eavesdrop, but it was useless because I could still hear them anyway.

"And what about her?" Esme asked again.

"I think she loves me too," Edward's voice sounded unsure. I could imagine him ran his hand through his hair.

"But?"

There was a pregnant pause before he answered, "But, I think she still has doubt about me. About us. I mean...if I go back to Harvard, we will have a long distance relationship and I don't think Bella wants that."

I bit my lip.

He knew it!

"And what do you want, dear?"

"I...I want to be with her, Mom. No matter the distance, I'll still love her."

My body felt warm and my eyes started to water. I quickly walked into my room, didn't have the energy to hear more.

I put my dirty clothes on my bag along with my toiletries bag and then I curled up under the comforter. I stared blankly to the window.

Why everything must be complicated? Or is it me that makes things get complicated? He loves me, I love him. We could be together. But, why a small part in me didn't fully want this relationship? I didn't understand what things that holds me back.

And then, I heard a soft knock from my door and the sound of the door being open. I went rigid and closed my eyes, pretending to sleep. I didn't think I was ready to see Edward now after my breakdown and also thankfully the window was the opposite way from the door so Edward could only saw my back.

"Bella? Are you still awake?" he asked me in low voice.

I didn't answer him, but I could hear he moved closer to the bed. My heart thumped in my chest and I was hoping Edward couldn't hear it in the quiet room.

"Do you mind if I lay with you for a moment?" Edward said again and I almost gasped.

I clutched the sheets tightly to prevent myself from shaking. I felt he gingerly opened the comforter and lay next to me or behind me.

He's so warm!

My heart was beating so fast and I didn't think I could survive if next time he will do things like this again. Edward wrapped my waist from behind and my body instantly wanted more.

Oh, no!

What is happening to me?

I felt he moved closer and rested his chin on my shoulder. I almost passed out.

"I know you can't hear me if you already asleep, but I just want to say something," he said and nuzzled my hair.

Why...oh...why does he do that to me?

"You're so beautiful and I love you so much," he began.

I opened my eyes slowly.

"I promise I will be a good man for you. I've...I've never wanted to feel worthy for anyone before, but since I met you I want to be worthy for your love and mostly I want to be worthy for you to be your man."

My eyes started to water again.

"Just give us a chance, Bella. Give me a chance."

He kissed my hair. "Sweet dreams, beautiful. Amo te ex toto corde meo."

I closed my eyes again and Edward got up from the bed. I heard footsteps and the sound of my door being opened and closed.

Dear, God!

Please, give me strength.

I woke up early in the morning and quickly had my shower and packing my bags because we will return to Massachusetts in the midday. Actually I hated leaving this house when everything was unsettled, but what was just happened yesterday was beyond my reach and I guess I could only leave it just the way it is. Mostly after what Edward had been said last night. I know he was telling the truth and he was sincere. I needed to find the courage to do this relationship thing with him.

Once I finished, I got out from my room and walked to the kitchen. I stopped on my feet when I saw Esme already in the kitchen. She smiled when she saw me. She looked fine, but when I saw her eyes there were so many hidden emotion there. I smiled back. I could tell she was amazing woman, for willingly survive for her family, mostly for her children. She might look fragile, but she was strong. As much as Edward didn't admit he love her mother, but I know he needs her.

"Hello, Bella. Good morning," she greeted me.

"Morning," I greeted back. "Do you need any help?"

Esme smiled again. "Sure, honey."

I stood next to her and helped her preparing our breakfast. I could see she already had three empty plates on the counter.

"My husband rarely has his breakfast here," she said as if she could read my mind.

I turned to look at her. "And Emmett?"

Esme arranged the plate on the dining table and I helped her. "He used to have breakfast, but today he wanted to spend time with Rosalie."

Oh, yeah, Rosalie...

I blushed slightly when I remember what happened the night before. "Um...Esme, I want to apologize about-"

Esme put her hand on my shoulder. "Don't! Please, don't apologize, Bella." She sighed and sat on the chair. I furrowed my eyebrows and sat next to her. "There are too many apologies in this house. What you did last night was something I wanted to do long ago, but I didn't have the courage to do that."

I blinked. "Oh."

Esme nodded and played with the glass in front of her. "Last night I spoke to my husband."

I smiled grimly. "Please, Esme. You don't have to tell me if you don't want too."

She looked at me with sad eyes. "Who else could I turn to talk to?"

My heart clenched and I held her hand which still rested on my shoulder. "Thank you if you trust me."

Esme smiled slightly. "If my son trusted you, then you are worthy to trust. Edward always shield himself away since...my suicide attempt..." I squeezed her hand, "I'm so glad he could find someone he could trust completely."

I really hoped Esme was telling the truth because I almost lost my hope with Edward last night. The moment I told my story in front of his family, it was a gambling moment for me. Edward could turn to hate me either he knows the truth sooner or later. But, I guess, the sooner the better.

"He loves you, Bella," Esme said again.

I nodded glumly. "Yes, I know."

"Do you love my son?"

I looked at her green eyes, the same eyes as Edward. "Yes," I said in low voice.

Esme gave me a knowing look. "But?"

I chuckled. She was truly a mother. "I can't lie to you, can I?"

She laughed lightly. "I raise two sons, Bella. I know some things."

I smiled and the sighed. "But, we still have long way to go to make our relationship works. I don't want to hurt Edward."

"Have you talked with Edward about this?"

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Not yet."

"I think you should talk to him, Bella. This is between the two of you. Even me and my husband can't interfere about that."

I nodded and looked at her again. "About Carlisle? If you don't mind I'm asking, what happened when you talked to him?"

Esme smiled grimly and took a sip from the glass. "I told him what I have to tell. I told him that what you said is true. We need to pay attention more for Edward. Not because for reputation, but because we love him."

I breathed the sigh of relief mentally. At least one person in this family still have her sanity.

And then, she grinned at me. "I bet you don't want to know what my husband said about that."

I laughed. "No, thank you, Esme. I've seen him enough in Our Hearts." As much as I wanted her to be more open about her suicidal attempt, but I knew I couldn't force her. She must have been deal with therapies and I have to say it's good for her.

Esme laughed back and held my hand. "Thank you for bringing our son back."

I shook my head. "I'm just helping. It's Edward who wants to go back."

We smiled at each other and at the moment, I already considered her as my second mom.

"Good morning," suddenly Edward greeted and we both looked at him.

Edward stopped on his feet when he saw the both of us and he blushed slightly when our gaze met. I smiled slightly. He must be thinking about last night. I was sure I was blushing too and my heart turned erratic again when I remember what he said the night before. Edward already dressed in dark T-shirt and jeans. Even with the simple clothes, he still looked handsome.

"Good morning, dear," Esme said, ignoring our blushing contest. "Come on. Have your breakfast."

Edward nodded slowly and sat next to me. He smiled warmly. "Good morning, Bella."

I blushed harder and trying so hard to tame my wild heart beat. "Morning."

Esme smiled to both of us and then rose from her chair. I looked at her curiously. "Why don't you two have your breakfast? I need to discuss something with my husband."

Edward blinked. "Sure, Mom."

Esme walked out from the dining room and gave me a slight wink before she disappeared from the kitchen. I shook my head. Tricky Mom!

Edward cleared his throat. "Um...how was your sleep last night?"

Even he was nervous too.

Same here.

I nervously cut the pancakes on my plate. "Good...it was good." Well, mostly when you lay next to me. I shook my head again.

"Yeah...me too."

Silence.

I glanced at Edward and he still didn't eat his breakfast yet. He was just playing with his food. I grinned. "It's not nice to play with your food."

Edward laughed lightly and then began to eat his pancake. We both ate our breakfast in a comfortable silence. I knew we have to talk about the issues in our relationship, but it could wait. I may not have the chance to eat breakfast again with Edward.

When we finished our breakfast, I helped Edward cleaned the dishes and he told me to prepare my bag because we will go to the airport in 30 minutes. I went to room and did the final check before I walked down to the living room again. Edward was already there, carrying his backpack and stood with his parents. I took a deep breath and approached them.

"I'm ready," I said to them.

The three of them looked at me and Esme smiled warmly. She gave me a tight hug. "Thank you for coming here, Bella. I hope you're thinking what I said to you," she whispered in my ear.

I leaned away from her embrace. "It's good to be here, Esme and yes I will think about what you said." I looked over to Carlisle and he stood there awkwardly. I extended my hand to him to ease the tension. "Thank you, Carlisle."

He smiled tightly and shook my hand. "The pleasure is mine, Bella. We will welcome you anytime here."

I doubted that.

"Are you ready?" Edward asked me.

I nodded at him and he held my hand. "I'll see you again to discuss about Harvard. Bye, Mom."

"Bye, Edward," Esme replied, couldn't hold the tears in her eyes.

I bit my lip and followed Edward to the front door. Just the moment when Edward opened the door, we heard Carlisle spoke, "You'll have your driving license back when you get released from Our Hearts."

We both stopped and I glanced at Edward. His lips twitched and turned around to look at his father. "Thank you, Dad. But, it doesn't matter anymore." He looked back at me. "Come on, Bella."

I smiled and nodded.

Once we were outside, there was a cab already waiting for us and Edward opened the passenger door for me. I didn't have to ask where the cab was coming from. I got in and scooted over to the opposite window. Edward slid in when he saw I already sat comfortably on my seat. He closed the door and the cab started to move. I could see he glanced over to his home before took deep breaths.

I smiled grimly and squeezed his hand. He raised his head to look at me. "I love your family, especially Esme. She reminds me to my mom."

Edward chuckled and pulled me to his embrace. He kissed the top of my head. "Yeah, I love her too."

I can't say much about this chapter...all I can say is I love this chapter ^^

Thank you for my readers who already read and gave their comments for my new story 'The Tarot Reader'. It's a fun story, less drama...I want to try my hand in writing humor :P

And I will take a break from writing due to Aidil Fitri celebration. Don't worry, though, I will continue to write in the beginning of September or you can follow me on Twitter (tri4mut) to see how I'm doing :D

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Thank you.

Latin translation:

Amo te ex toto corde meo = I love you with all my heart