A/N: It's been quite a strange few months for me. The details of which I will not bore you with but in addition to my writers block there were a few other issues that took precedence over this fic. Now, I'm back to writing. I think I have this basically finished though I'm not sure it's to the standard I would like.

I can only apologise for long wait and thank you for your patience and kind reviews.

Chapter 52- Epiphany

The cold was suddenly the most welcoming thing he had ever felt.

Mist had surrounded them quickly as Erik pushed the boat along the narrow passageways beneath the Opera Populaire and the chilled air became moist. He wanted to turn around to face Christine but he could hardly bear to look at her.

Erik's hands gripped the oar so hard that the knuckles on both hands had turned a cool white edged with hot red.

His mask lay at his feet.

Christine sat behind him in silence.

They had traveled someway into the cellars before she finally spoke. 'Why are you doing this?'

'You could have asked me that before trying to humiliate me,' he replied quietly, still not turning to face her.

'Let me go back,'

'No,'

'You can't just kidnap people,'

Erik shook his head, almost feeling a laugh creep into his throat. He was sure they had had this conversation before. He was sure his answer had been exactly the same. 'I can do whatever I choose to,'

'They will come for you!' She shouted, unnecessarily. 'They will rescue me and they will kill you,' despite the meaning of the words there was a distinct lack of venom to them as they escaped her lips.

'I'm sure they will come,' Erik responded. 'But they won't kill me and they won't find you,'

Suddenly, silence fell around them. He was surprised that he was managing to maintain his calm despite the rage building inside him.

'What will you do to me?' Her voice was soft, almost cracking, as if she was forcing the words out.

It was at this point Erik anger reached almost a pinnacle. He managed to look over his shoulder, see her tear stained cheeks, and not lose his sense of fury.

'What will I do to you?' He stared at her, her face no longer hurting him. 'Look what you have done to me!'

'Erik...'

'Shut up!' He yelled, the sound of his voice bouncing around the cavernous underground. 'You have no idea what you just did, you don't understand...'

'How dare you...'

'Me?' He spat. 'How dare you?! You have stripped me bare, shown my face to a world where people never understood. I am nothing but a freak to those people and yet you, who said she cared, would unmask me before them!'

Her eyes closed but she did not respond.

'I have spent my entire life hiding from people, hiding my face,' His heart felt wild in his chest but he could not stop. 'And the woman I have opened up to most, the one who begged me for my trust, is the one that has exposed me to them all. Exposed me to their ridiculous prejudice and hate...'

Christine took a breath. 'They hate you because you have murdered,'

'You use the wrong word, Christine,' He pushed the boat through a small space, ducking his head down, before turning back to her. 'I have killed. You are so naive,'

'I ask you again, Erik...'

'You use my name as if you have the right to,'

'You were my friend,'

'And yet we both know how very little that means to you,'

'You were...' She paused, as if stuck. He looked away. 'I ask you again... what will you do with me?'

'If only that boy did not possess you so I could have explained everything,' Erik said quietly, over the swish of the oar gliding through the water. 'As it happens, now there is no time and no reason for an explanation,'

'You must...'

'I must what?' He snapped. 'Tell you? I must tell you nothing! You don't deserve to hear my words, Christine, because you would not believe me anyway. All the trust that we had for each other is now gone. You have destroyed it.'

'My father...'

'Is inconsequential,' He interrupted. 'There is no point in us rehashing what is gone,'

'You took his money,'

'He took mine first, remember that,'

'He had no other option,'

Erik rolled his eyes. 'I did not know your father, Christine, that is the truth, but I am sure he is like all of the others who borrow money from Gabriele's little enterprise,'

'And what is that like then?'

For a moment he was awash with a strange feeling, a tingling in his chest, so strong he almost stopped talking. Almost. 'Many men take drugs or gamble, they squander their wealth in someway,'

'He had no wealth,'

Erik sighed. 'He had his home, he could have sold and moved somewhere smaller perhaps,'

'The home we lived in was not big,'

'I do not need to justify my business to you,' He growled. 'And if we are to keep going over the past what about your many betrayals of me?'

Christine shook her head. 'When did I betray you?'

'Spending your evenings with De Chagny is not betraying me?'

'No!' She raised her voice. 'He was my friend,'

'Yet somehow he is now your fiancé,' Erik said. 'Interesting development, completely unexpected, I might add,'

'Your sarcasm doesn't hurt me, Erik,'

'I'm not trying to hurt you,'

'Then what are you doing?'

'Taking you away,'

'You can't just do that,'

He smiled. 'I can,' he said. 'And I am,'

Christine opened her mouth as if to say something and then closed it again quickly. She was looking back at him as he pushed forward through the underground corridors finally finding the opening to his lake and his home.

'You're really not going to tell me what's going on here are you?' She asked after the long period of silence.

He decided not to reply, instead he concentrated on pulling the boat up to his makeshift shore line and hooking the rope onto its anchor. When he reached out to help Christine from the boat she refused his aid, choosing to struggle out onto the dusty ground at the waters edge. He shrugged his shoulders at her and made his way into his home, picking things up as he moved along.

'Take me back, Erik,' she said, and although it was a demand it sounded almost sorrowful.

It was then that he spotted the body in the corner of the room. Nadir lay, utterly lifeless, in the doorway at the back of his home. His eyes fixed on his friend, he said, 'I can't,'

'You can,' she said. 'You can do anything you choose, remember?'

'Then I choose not to,' He responded, turning to face her, trying to get his head around what was happening. 'We really are past the point of no return here, Christine, there is no going back now. There is danger all around and you are safer with me,'

'You said we lost our trust,'

'I did,' he nodded in agreement. 'But I'm not sure you've lost your trust in me,'

'You've killed...' she paused. 'Ubaldo?'

He nodded.

'Oh, Erik!'

'If he had left when I suggested it he would still be alive now,' Erik shrugged. 'You need to listen to me, we need to go...'

'You don't even care,'

'You should not comment on things you do not understand,'

'Have you gorged yourself at last in your lust for blood?'

He shook his head, sighed.

'Am I now to be prey to your lust for flesh?'

He shuddered at her words, taking his eyes away from her, her face unbearable. 'You're a fool,' he said, the anger bubbling in him once again. He reached up to his face, closed his eyes, and touched the dented and deformed flesh that only barely covered his skull.

'I have been denied much by my face,' he opened his eyes. 'This face earned a mother's fear and loathing, she could not look at me, could not stand to be near me,'

Christine said nothing.

'Can you imagine, a mother giving her own son for a few coins, to a carnival?' he asked. 'That is what she did, Christine, my own mother could not love this face... the reason you can't love me either,'

The water swished and the sound of shouting above them began to descend into the room.

'My very first item of clothing was a mask, made of wood,' His eyes fixed onto her once again, but this time it was she who looked away. 'It would splinter my skin, causing more damage... when I grew I made my own out of stone and then ceramic,'

Christine was shaking.

'You're afraid of me,' he said, noting the gentle movement of her shoulders. 'But you're now stuck with me,'

He walked towards her, taking those delicate shoulders in his hands and spinning her around so that she was looking right at him. 'Look at this face! An eternity of this for you...'

Her eyes turned cold as she stared at him, she did not blink or pull away, her eyes fixed upon him and she stared hard.

'This haunted face holds no horror for me now,' she was shaking her head. 'Its in your soul that the true distortion lies,'

The words punched him in the chest, made him reel, but he held it together. He was about to respond with rage when he heard a clanking at the bars to his home. He turned his head to face the noise and began to laugh.

'It would appear,' he said. 'That we have a guest,'

Christine spun around, seeing her fiancé waist deep in the water and with pearls of it dripping from his face. 'Raoul!'

'This is indeed an unparalleled delight,' Erik continued. He turned his eyes on Christine and told her, 'It would seem that you're not that only woman to betray me tonight,'

'Let her go,' Raoul demanded.

Erik shook his head.

'Free her!' Raoul shouted. 'Do what you like but you must free her!'

'There are a lot of people telling me what I must do tonight,'

''Have you no pity?'

Though he knew there were more pressing matters at hand, Erik was finding some amusement in this. He turned to Christine, 'Your lover makes a passionate plea,'

She was shaking her head. 'Please, Raoul, it's useless,'

'I love her!' He called out. 'Does that mean nothing to you? I love her! Show some compassion,'

'The world showed no compassion to me!' Erik snarled, walking towards the edge of the lake.

'Let me in!' Raoul shouted. 'Let me see her,'

'Be my guest,' Erik replied, lifting the lever causing the pulley to move the bars up from the ground. The boy ran in, delirious that he could see Christine yet not concentrating on Erik.

He casually walked around behind him and slipped the rope over his neck, pulling it tight so that Raoul needed to be on his toes to survive. He kicked his feet and Christine screamed but Erik felt no pity and no mercy for the man who had been a party to breaking his heart.

'Erik!'

'Shut up, Christine,' he barked, turning his attention back to Raoul, circling him. 'Welcome, Monsieur, to my humble abode, you have done well to make it this far,'

'Let me go,' Raoul gasped.

'No,'

'Fine!' Raoul held a hand up. 'Fine but... I'll do anything... just let Christine leave... let her go unharmed,'

Erik began to laugh. 'You actually thought that I would harm her?'

Raoul did not reply.

'Never,' Erik said and then he smiled. 'But she told you that, didn't she?'

Christine was looking at her hands.

'You told him that?' Erik asked her.

Finally, she nodded.

'You should trust her,' Erik smiled. 'I would never hurt her, would never let anyone else harm her either,'

Raoul kicked his feet but began to choke.

'I wouldn't do that if I were you,' Erik said. 'The lasso is designed to tighten as you struggle, the more you struggle the more likely you are to suffocate... rather an ingenious design, wouldn't you say?'

'You're a monster,'

'Not in the least,' Erik made his voice light as he spoke. 'I'm going to offer you a deal,'

'Anything,' Raoul said.

'Not you,' Erik turned around. 'Christine,'

She looked at him and frowned.

'Say you'll come with me and he lives, I will let him go,' He shrugged. 'Or you can leave and I kill him, that is your choice,'

Christine's frown creased into anguish as she looked from Raoul to Erik. She began to shake her head quickly from side to side. 'The tears I might have shed for your dark fate, grow cold and turn to tears of hate,'

Raoul clung to the rope, 'Christine forgive me!'

The boy actually thought she might be talking to him. Erik watched and then realised that maybe the direction of the statement had been a little ambiguous.

Raoul was still pleading like a child. 'I did it all for you, Christine!'

'Farewell my fallen idol and false friend,' she said quietly.

''Christine,' Raoul called.

'We had such hopes and now they are shattered,'

Raoul struggled. 'Christine!'

'Christine,' Erik said softly.

She looked at both men.

'Too late for prayers and useless pity,' Erik moved away slightly, letting Raoul choke.

'No,' Raoul's breathing was becoming very laboured. 'If you say you love him my life is over anyway!'

'Such sentiment,' Erik placed his hand over his heart. 'It touches me,'

'You're evil,' Raoul glared at him.

He smiled back. 'No point in fighting, Christine,' he said. 'Either way you choose you cannot win,'

'He wins no matter what,' Raoul coughed.

'So,' Erik tilted his head to the side, looking at Christine. 'Do you end your days with me or do you send him to his grave?'

'I...' She choked.

'That is your choice, Christine,'

'Say no!' Raoul demanded. 'Don't do this!'

'His life is now the prize which you must earn,' Erik said.

'Angel of Music,' Christine's voice was so gentle it barely broke the air before her. 'You deceived me, I gave my mind blindly,'

Erik felt the burning in his chest, anger, thinking of Nadir, as he spun around. 'You try my patience! Make your choice!'

It wasn't until then, until Christine looked at him, that her eyes finally softened. 'Pitiful creature of darkness what kind of life have you known?'

He swallowed, surprised by the gentle tone of her voice as she walked towards him. Only inches away, she said, 'God give me courage to show you that you are not alone,'

Then she reached out, holding his face in her hands, unconcerned about the feeling of his ragged flesh. She gently pulled him towards her until her lips touched his, then with a softness he had always thought impossible yet had always dreamed of, she kissed him. The anger burning within him was washed away by the smoothness of her warm lips.

When she pulled back she was frowning, there was something in her eyes, something he had never seen before. And then she did it again, this time her kiss was harder and, if Erik did not know better, more passionate. He could feel her warmth radiate through him, felt he should do something with his hands but was completely frozen. He kissed her back, feeling her lips move gently with his until the sound of the mob began to get louder, and broke him from his bliss.

He shoved her away, blinking. He could barely remember where he was - who he was.

Then, a glance over his shoulder at Nadir, reminded him. 'Go,' he said.

She was staring at him, eyes wide, lips slightly swollen. He heard 'Track down this murderer' but it was not that that bothered him. Where was Gabriele?

Somehow he dragged his eyes away from Christine and ran to Raoul, pulling the rope from around his neck. Raoul was frowning.

'Take her,' Erik said. 'Go and forget all of this but take her far away,'

'What?'

'You need to get away from here,' Erik continued, urgency pulling the words from his mouth. 'She is in trouble, in danger and as long as you are here so are you,'

'Erik...' Christine's voice hit him like a hammer, his name on her lips now heaven and hell rolled into one beautiful sound.

'Get out of here,' Erik ignored her though his heart screamed at him. 'Forget me, forget all you have seen... go now, don't let them find you...'

'Who?' Raoul asked.

'It doesn't matter,' Erik snapped. 'Just go!'

He turned and moved away. Christine reached for him as he walked past but he avoided her touch, the memory of her softness too painful to bear as he let her go.

'I ca...'

'Go!'

'Erik...'

'Christine, please...' He pleaded. 'Please...'

She looked from him to Raoul. It was Raoul who spoke. 'Come Christine, I believe him, if he says you are in danger here then you are in danger,'

'Erik...'

'Stop it!' Erik screamed, covering his ears. Just go... 'Take the boat, leave me here,'

Raoul grabbed her hand and pulled her into the boat, unhooked it as he pushed the oar into the water. Christine was staring at Erik as they moved away but he averted his eyes, falling to the floor, too weak to move anymore.

'Stop!' It was Christine's voice that filled the cave. 'Raoul wait here,'

The sound of the water splashing made him open his eyes. She ran to him, throwing her arms around him and squeezing him tight.

'I'm sorry,' She whispered as she let him go, pressing her ring into his hand.

So am I, he thought, so am I.