Ditzy gasped in dismay as the full reality of the situation sunk into her awareness. Discord had kidnapped her only daughter. Discord had snatched Dinky right out of Ditzy's house. Did he take anything else? What wouldn't he take if he'd take Dinky?
" I need a muffin..." Ditzy said, opening the fridge.
" ARGGGGHHH" She screamed, when the fridge light turned on to reveal a solitary milk container, and no. Muffins.
After she slammed the door on the refrigerator a letter fell from her mail mare sack. The letter she'd come home to read. The letter addressed to the leader of the Heroes of Harmony, and then Ditzy Doo.
" Perhaps there's something in this letter that can help me get my Dinky back?" Ditzy said, opening the letter with a swift swipe of her letter opener, which promptly embedded itself in the wall when it slipped out of her hooves
The words on the paper swirled and cluttered together, all mismatched and non-sensical.
" That's right, I should get my glasses first." Ditzy said, snapping her hoof, which knocked the glasses off from their perch on the fridge and neatly onto her head. " Much better."
Twilight, if you're reading this, the six elements of harmony have failed, and Discord has already taken over Ponyville if not all of Equestria by now. There's something I haven't told you my dear student. Something not even included in your most accurate of historical books. There was another Element of Harmony. I had thought that six would be enough, after all, it worked before. Since the first six Elements of Harmony failed to send discord back to his life as a garden statue, you must use the 7th Element of Harmony. This Element is Muffins, and it's embodied by my dear friend Ditzy Doo. Only she can unlock its full potential and send Discord back to his life as a statue in my garden.
" This is preposterous, mocking my love of muffins with this, this muffinery! I mean that's ridiculous! Muffins as an Element of Harmony, what kind of backwards Unicorn logic is that? My muffins, psh, preposterous, muffins? Muffins and element of harmony, my delicious, nutritious muffins." Ditzy said, getting more and more distracted by each succeeding mention of muffins.
" There's only one thing that can settle me down after reading a letter like that..." Ditzy said, rummaging around in her mail mare bag, hoping that this time, she'd selected the correct side of the satchel. Ditzy's mail mare pouch was different from other Mail Mare satchels, it had a secret compartment filled with Muffins, and now that all her fresh baked goods at home had been looted by the nefarious Discord, she sought solace with any that might remain within her Mail Mare bag, customized at her request by Sweetie Belle, who'd had a better knack for reasonable customization than her older sister Rarity.
There was a muffin left, she pulled it out and began chewing it over. While thinking intently upon the contents of the letter, what could muffins do that all the other Elements of Harmony could not? She swallowed the muffin she had been eating... That's it! She thought.
The other Elements of Harmony could attack from the outside, put perhaps, Discord had to be attacked with the Elements of Harmony from the inside. I just need some muffins empowered with the Elements of Harmony to complete the plan. Ditzy Doo thought to herself, idly reaching into the bag for another muffin, and finding none.
" Where am I supposed to get more muffins when I have nothing to bake them with?" Ditzy Doo exclaimed, well aware that the Ponyville she'd known before now was radically changing around her, just outside of her sphere of influence.
Pinkie Pie. The thought occurred to her. Her good friend Pinkie Pie was living over a bakery, it stood to reason, that she might have some muffins. Ditzy Doo took up her satchel from the peg by the door and left for Pinkies home. On the way there she saw many strange things, even a flying Unicorn with eyes similar to hers, with a screw in a ball on her flank. The land floated, the sky darkened where it should be bright and it brightened where it should've been darkest. The few Pegasi still assigned to weather control were working desperately to mediate the damage caused by the unexpected storms and chocolate rain.
" Pinkie, Hello? Are you here?" Ditzy asked, nudging open the door to the darkened bakery.
" Is that you Ditzy Doo? Are you here to laugh at me too?" Pinkie said from the darkness.
I don't like it when Dark Pinkie comes out, it looks like I'll have to talk her down. Ditzy thought to herself before speaking up, " Pinkie, why would I laugh at you? You were always the one keeping people from laughing at me! I know the elements didn't work out too well for you and your friends, but Discord stole my muffins... and I don't have any..."
" Muffins eh? That's no laughing matter alright, Ok, I'll make you some muffins. At least you didn't say Cupcakes... Oh god how they loved to laugh at the cupcakes, at me." Pinkie said grimly, her tone turning temporarily darker as she turned up the lights to see her baking.
" Do you need help? I need these muffins something fierce, Dinky went missing." Ditzy said walking over to the kitchen to continue talking to Pinkie Pie at a reasonable volume.
" Usually I have Applejacks help, but she's gone crazy. Like lying crazy. When I asked her what she was laughing at, she said Chocolate Milk, but it wasn't raining... Sure get me the flour, what kind of muffins do you want?" Pinkie said, reminiscing back to better days, more normal days.
" Honey and chili peppers." Ditzy said instantly, having thought of the most arbitrary chaotic flavor combination possible.
" Iiinteresting, that's not what you usually get. You said Ditzy went missing, with this combination, I can guess who, and my twitchy tail says it's Discord, or I'm a unicorn." Pinkie said adding the other ingredients and tossing Ditzy a spoon to mix with.
" You can tell just from that?" She asked.
" You remind me of my sisters before I saw those rainbows, so bland and boring. Don't get me wrong it's sort of sweet, and your attachment to muffins... Golly I dunno, it seems out of character for you to order something with so much flavor, much less that sort of contrast." Pinkie said, some of her color returning.
" You read me like one of your recipes. Yes, Discord stole Dinky, and Twilight's missing as are the books from the library. I have to stop him, somehow. I'd ask for your help, but I wouldn't want to let you down. Being a Heropony of Harmony and not being able to stop him would be enough disappointment for anypony I think." Ditzy said, sighing in frustration, mixing the ingredients as Pinkie added them, dry and wet alike.
" I'm feeling better since talking to you Ditzy, maybe I'll talk to the others. Whoever I can find at least, and give it another shot. After all, if Discord is abducting Fillies... Maybe the chocolate rain isn't worth it. I can't say for sure about the cotton candy clouds, but the chocolate rain is definitely not worth it!" Pinkie stated fiercely.
Reader's Note: After the end of my last chapter/part post, someone asked if that was Discord's 'real' name, I don't know, he's just referred to as 'Discord' in Canon, but it seems appropriate for him to have two names to me. The middle initial is just a blatant throw-back to Star Trek and De Lancie's(Voice Actor) work as Q in it. Consider it my little contribution to Fanon. I would look up BaldDumboRat on Youtube( If I were you my dear readers). She does a fan voice for Derpy/Ditzy, and I almost always read Derpy/Ditzy's lines in her voice in my head. Additionally I couldn't help but laugh when watching one of her newest sets, where she said it was too bad that Muffins weren't an Element of Harmony, right after I'd written this section and started this story.