Oh my gosh. Yes, I am alive, and yes, I am a horrible person for completely abandoning this fic. Reading all of your reviews just breaks my heart. Please forgive me! And please forgive me for this short chapter. I decided on the spur of the moment to continue with this story, even though I have not read any Junjou fanfiction in a while, so I need to ease myself back into it. I promise I will update regularly though! Simply for you guys. Your reviews are absolutely lovely, YOU are absolutely lovely, and I hope I can make this story live up to your expectations.
Disclaimer: I do not own Junjou Romantica or any of the characters, obviously.
Tension.
There was tension covering every inch of the apartment that Misaki could not escape. Even the teddy bear room no longer felt cuddly and warm. The bears seemed to stare accusingly at Misaki. What have you done? they asked him, the same thing he continuously asked himself.
Usagi-san was acting like his normal self, which only made it worse. He was forcing himself, Misaki knew, as the dreaded date got closer and closer. And the closer it got, the more confused Misaki became. He could not deny that he wanted to go on the date. He wanted to have dinner with a cute, charming girl. He wanted others to see him and her and think ah, what a lovely couple.
Misaki was not gay. He was positive of this fact. No man made his heart beat faster or made his mind cloud with lust. He didn't find himself imagining any sort of romantic situation with anyone of the male gender.
But he imagined himself with Usagi-san.
Always.
Usagi-san had become such a large part of his life without him even realizing it. By going out on this date, was he not taking for granted what he and Usagi-san had built? Guilt swelled in his chest, pushing the excitement away.
Misaki sighed and got up from the chair inside of the teddy bear room, re-entering the apartment. Not surprisingly, Usagi-san was sitting on the couch, smoking a cigarette.
"I was wondering when you were going to come out from there", he chuckled lightly, taking a drag.
Misaki blushed.
"I-it's a quiet place to think!" he sputtered.
"You don't need to explain yourself to me, Misaki. You are free to spend as much time with my bears as you please", he took another drag, blowing the smoke out slowly before speaking again.
"At least I know you won't be going on any dates with them".
Misaki cringed.
"Usagi-san, I-"
"Misaki, you don't have to explain yourself to me. Go take a bath. I filled the tub and it won't stay warm forever".
Misaki stalled, trying to read the expression on Usagi-san's face. He looked calm and reserved.
But no, that wasn't it.
"Usagi-san?"
"Hm?" he replied, finally turning to look at Misaki.
That was it.
The feelings in his eyes.
As if he was looking into the past. As if, looking at Misaki, he was overcome with a sense of nostalgia. As if he was looking at a picture of something he had lost a long time ago.
"What is it, Misaki?"
Misaki shivered lightly. The way his name rolled off of Usagi-san's lips, the sensuality of it. He never knew his own name could sound so positively lovely. So precious.
In the nineteen years of his life before he met Usagi-san, he had never heard a voice that affected him so. Usagi-san's deep, soothing voice that pierced him like ice, yet filled him up like warm honey.
He had never met someone who, with one downcast look, could send a torrent of emotions throughout his entire body and make him glow.
Someone who's hands could work him into a frenzy with only a light stroke of his fingers, the way those hands held him gently, soothingly, as the last tremors died down in his body after –
Misaki knew what he had to do.
Once again, sorry it's so short! Easing myself back in~ The next chapter will be out soon, I promise you! Although you probably don't trust me at all ;c