Chapter Sixty: Forced Opponents

---x---

(A/N: I PLANNED on having this chapter out on Tuesday morning, but the REAL Raw did a few things that went against mine. The main one being that they made HHH fight Snitsky, I was planning on having Machetti fight him, but I can't really do that now. But none-the-less I'm going to have to make a couple changes.

1. The Match between Orton and Jeff Hardy was non-title (since Machetti is the Intercontinental Champion, not Jeff.)

2. The 6 Diva tag match is changed from Mickie, Ashley, and Maria versus Beth, Melina, and Jillian, to a regular tag match with Mickie and Ashley taking on Melina and Beth, with the same result, Beth Phoenix pinning Mickie after a Fisherman's Suplex.

I think that's about it. But besides that Paul London lost a singles match to Hardcore Holly on HeAT Sorry but London and Kendrick won't be appearing in this chapter.)

---x---

Raw was live from Mobile Alabama. Mr. McMahon was in his office threatening Hornswoggle, he just announced that Horny would be competing in a 'mini' Royal Rumble. Vince just let go of Hornswoggle's throat and told him that he was proud of him. Someone knocked on the door and Machetti walked into the office, he was dressed to compete and had the Intercontinental Championship on his shoulder. Hornswoggle took this opportunity to slip out the door passed Machetti.

"You wanted to see me?" asked Machetti once Hornswoggle had left.

"Yes I did," answered Vince, as he glared at the Intercontinental Champion, "Machetti, last week you deliberately defied me by attempting to participate in the Royal Rumble Qualifying Match with my son Hornswoggle. You've been in this company long enough to have learned that you don't cross the boss."

"Well if I had been given a Royal Rumble Qualifying Match of my own we wouldn't be in this situation," Machetti told him, "I want the WWE Championship back, and the way I see it, the best way to do that is by winning the Royal Rumble. So I'll do whatever it takes to get into it."

"Whatever it takes, huh?" questioned Vince, "Machetti, don't take this the wrong way, I still hate you, but I'm going to give you a chance to qualify for the Royal Rumble. Not because you deserve it, no…" Vince paused and glared Machetti, then his voice went cold and he practically snarled, "But because I want to see you get hurt!"

"Well a lot of people have attempted to hurt me in my career so far," replied Machetti, "some of them have succeeded more than others, but what makes you think you that you can do it?"

"Because I own this company," said Vince, "I can do anything I want. I can make any match I want. All I have to do is make sure you're willing to compete to the point where you're willing to get hurt in order to win. So if you're as determined to get into the Royal Rumble as you say you are then you're already willing to put your physical safety on the line, and you'll compete in any match I put you in."

"You've got that right," Machetti shot back, "and I'll win it too!"

"That's actually what I'm expecting," replied Vince with an evil smirk, "you see, last week, when I was trying to come up with a way to punish you, I realized that you can take an annoyingly large amount of punishment and you always manage to bounce back. I can inflict as much physical pain as legally possible on you, and if you're still able to walk, you'll somehow make it to the Royal Rumble, and you'll compete."

"Aw… you've been studying my matches," said Machetti in a patronizing tone. "So please, tell me, what did you decided to do?"

Vince glared at Machetti but the evil smirk didn't leave his face, he'd be getting the last laugh tonight, "Machetti, no matter how much physical pain I have inflicted on you, somehow, you'll find a way to bounce back. So what I decided to do was inflict EMOTIONAL pain on you. Machetti, tonight you're going to be fighting in a Royal Rumble Qualifying Match, and you're going to be facing… MARIA!"

The smile on Machetti's face disappeared and he glared at Vince, but that only made the Chairman's smirk grow larger, "You see," continued Vince, "I realized that if I forced you to face you're little girlfriend, it'll kill you inside because you'll have to hurt her in order to get what you want. Anything you do to her, will feel one hundred times worse to you. You've made your bed, now you need to sleep in it. This isn't another one of your little pillow fights, if you want to get in the Royal Rumble that bad, you're going to have to hurt her, not only to win the match, but to keep her from winning as well. Imagine if you let her beat you tonight and ended up in the Royal Rumble… she'd be only the second female competitor to fight in the match, and you won't be there to protect her. There are guys like Umaga, Kane, and Snitsky in the Rumble and they won't hesitate to hurt her. So you need to decide, what's worse, you hurting Maria to get what you want, or someone else doing it? Now… get out of my office… you've got a match tonight."

Machetti glared at Vince then turned and left the room, his mind was working frantically in an attempt to find a loop hole. The door closed leaving Mr. McMahon alone in the office with the evil smirk still on his face, then Raw went to a commercial break.

---x---

Raw came back from the break, Riot Time hit and WWE Intercontinental Champion Machetti came out from the back, carrying his belt with him. "The following is a Royal Rumble Qualifying Match, and is scheduled for one fall, introducing first from Detroit Michigan, weighing in at two hundred and fifteen pounds, he is the current WWE Intercontinental Champion, MACHETTI!" Machetti ran down to the ring and slid under the bottom rope and into the ring. There was a smile on Machetti's face, apparently Machetti had figured a way to counter the Chairman's diabolical plan. Machetti ran to the corner jumped up onto the middle rope then back-flipped off of it and landed back in the middle of the ring. Then he turned to face the entrance ramp.

With Legs Like That by Zebrahead hit and Maria came out from the back, she looked a little nervous but for the most part seemed alright as she headed down to the ring, "and the opponent from Chicago Illinois, MARIA!" Maria got in the ring and stood across it from Machetti who handed his Intercontinental Championship to the referee then pulled off his shirt and tossed it out of the ring. The fans were booing the fact that the two of them were being force to compete. Machetti met Maria in the middle of the ring and gave her a quick hug and whispered something in her ear to which Maria nodded in response. Machetti said something else which caused Maria to smile then he let go of her and backed across the ring. The referee came over and called for the bell and signaled for the match to start. Machetti glanced at the referee for a second then turned to Maria and smirked at her. Maria nodded then turned around and left the ring walked halfway up the entrance ramp and then just stood there.

The referee glanced at Machetti, who shrugged then told the referee to count, ONE…. TWO… THREE… FOUR… FIVE…. SIX, Maria still showed no signs of getting back in the ring... SEVEN... EIGHT… NINE, the referee paused and glanced at Machetti who just smirked in response… TEN! MARIA GOT COUNTED OUT! Riot Time hit and Maria ran back into the ring and hugged Machetti, "Ladies and gentlemen here is your winner by count out, MACHETTI!" A graphic appeared and it said, "Machetti qualifies for the Royal Rumble" Machetti and Maria turned to leave the ring, but suddenly Mr. McMahon appeared on the TitanTron.

"Just a damn minute, cut the music!" snapped an extremely angry Vince McMahon. "Machetti, you must think you're pretty smart, but I'm using my powers as WWE Chairman to render the decision of that match null and void. Meaning Machetti is NOT in the Royal Rumble." In response the fans booed, "I'm restarting that match and now there are no count outs, and just so you don't get any ideas, there are no disqualifications either! You can only win by pinfall or submission!"

The fans booed as Vince left the TitanTron and the cameras returned to the ring. The referee called for the bell and restarted the match. Machetti who was still holding Maria's hand, turned to her and smiled, then he whispered something in her ear, then let go of her and took a few steps back. Maria nodded to Machetti then laid down on her back. Machetti glanced at Maria ran over to the ropes on the other side of the ring, then came off. But halfway across the ring Machetti 'tripped' and fell on his face. Machetti crawled over to Maria and draped his arm over her, the referee counted ONE… TWO… THREE! MACHETTI PINNED MARIA! Again the referee called for the bell and Riot Time hit and started playing from where it had left off. "Ladies and gentlemen here is your winner, MACHETTI!" The graphic appeared again saying"Machetti qualifies for the Royal Rumble".

But like before Vince McMahon appeared on the TitanTron even angrier than before, "Cut the damn music!" shouted Vince, "Again I am nullifying the referee's decision. Machetti you and Maria are going to fight again, and now the match is going to be… A SUBMISSION MATCH! Now you can only win by forcing Maria to submit." The fans booed loudly as Vince left the TitanTron. Machetti and Maria turned to the referee, who shrugged then called for the bell again.

Machetti turned to Maria and… for some reason, he smiled. Machetti picked Maria up and then dropped down onto his knees before placing Maria down on the mat. Maria looked a little confused but that look vanished when Machetti suddenly started tickling her. Maria started laughing the referee came over and Maria yelled that she gave up. The referee seemed confused but none-the-less called for the bell. No one had ever seen someone win a match by tickling their opponent. Machetti stopped tickling Maria and pulled her up to her feet. "Ladies and gentlemen here is your winner by submission, MACHETTI!" Again Riot Time picked up where it left off and the now familiar graphic appeared.

But once again Vince McMahon appeared on the TitanTron. "Dammit Machetti, you're going to fight in this match if it kills you! I'm nullifying the referee's decision…" The fans interrupted with loud boos, "… and I'm restarting the match as a FIRST BLOOD MATCH!" The fans exploded with a loud round of boos, "Let's see you weasel your way out of this!" Vince left the TitanTron and the referee reluctantly called for the bell and started the First Blood Match. In order to win, Machetti had to make Maria bleed.

Maria stared at Machetti and looked terrified. Machetti reached out and put a hand on Maria's shoulder and told her everything would be fine. Maria didn't look all that convinced, but Machetti turned away from her and glanced around the arena and at the crowd. Eventually he spotted something and smiled. Machetti left the ring and walked over to the barricade and stood in front of a female fan. He leaned over and asked her something which seemed to surprise her. But eventually she reached back and pulled out her hair pin and handed it to Machetti. Machetti smiled and thanked her then quickly got back into the ring.

Maria looked at Machetti with confusion when he came over. Machetti slowly reached out and took Maria's hand in his. Machetti told Maria that she'd be okay. Then he took the hair pin with his other hand and lightly scratched the side of Maria's index finger. The light scratch was enough to make a cut, Machetti called the referee over and showed him the small drop of blood that had come out of the cut on Maria's finger. Technically she was bleeding. The referee turned and called for the bell, and Riot Time picked up again.

Machetti held Maria's hand in his and kissed the cut on her finger. When he took his lips away the blood was gone. Maria shrugged and then smiled. "Ladies and gentlemen here is your winner, MACHETTI!" Again the graphic appeared saying that Machetti was in the Royal Rumble. Machetti glanced over at the girl in the crowd she shook her head, after seeing what Machetti had used the pin for, she didn't need it back.

But the music cut as Vince appeared on the TitanTron again. He was so angry he could barely speak, but in a low growl he said, "You're not in the Rumble… TABLES MATCH!" Vince disappeared and Maria stared at Machetti and once again looked frightened. Mr. McMahon was hell-bent on forcing Machetti to hurt Maria, making her finger bleed wouldn't cut it, now Machetti had to put Maria through a table. The referee called for the bell and started the match.

Machetti turned to Maria and shrugged then got out of the ring, lifted the ring apron and slid a table out from under the ring. But before putting the apron back down Machetti noticed something under the ring and smirked. But he didn't pull it out, instead he put the apron back down, then got the table and slid it into the ring. Machetti set up the table and glanced at Maria. Maria looked scared, was Machetti planning on actually putting her through the table?

Machetti walked around the table and up to Maria, took a second to glanced at the referee standing behind her, then leaned in and whispered something in her ear. When Machetti finished Maria nodded and seemed to understand. Machetti reached out and pushed Maria backwards causing her to 'accidentally' knock over the referee. Both of them crashed to the mat and the referee was out. Machetti smirked and got out of the ring, then went over to the part of the ring apron he had lifted before.

Machetti lifted the ring apron and pulled out… TRIPLE H'S SLEDGEHAMMER! Machetti took the sledgehammer and got in the ring and went over to the table. Machetti lifted the apron above his head and brought it crashing down on top of the table The sledgehammer broke the table in half, Machetti smiled at his handiwork and slid the hammer out of the ring, then he called Maria over. Maria laid on top of the table and Machetti kneeled down next to it. The referee recovered and glanced over at Maria and Machetti, he saw Maria laying on top of the broken table and called for the bell.

Machetti helped Maria up off of the table as theme music hit, but it wasn't Riot Time. Instead No Chance played and an irate WWE Chairman came out from the back stormed onto the entrance ramp. "That does it!" snapped Vince, "Machetti you're not going to be competing in any more Royal Rumble Qualifying Matches against Maria! Instead you're going to face someone else for their spot in the Rumble, and you're going to face them in another Tables Match!" Mr. McMahon glared at Machetti, the Intercontinental Champion had been able to weasel his way out of hurting Maria in five different matches, obviously this wasn't going to work. "Machetti take a look at you're new opponent!"

Umaga's theme theme music played through the arena and the Samoan Bulldozer came out from the back and stood next to Mr. McMahon. "Machetti," snarled Vince, "If you lose this you don't get another chance at entering the Royal Rumble, and if you win you get Umaga's spot in it. I hope you get hurt!" Then the Chairman turned and headed backstage while Umaga screamed something and headed down the entrance ramp. Machetti got Maria out of the ring, then slid the remains of the broken table under the bottom rope and out of the ring, then he backed up and waited for Umaga to get in the ring.

Umaga didn't get in the ring right away, he stopped in front of it and stepped over the remains of the table that Machetti had just slid out of the ring, then lifted the ring apron and pulled out a table. Umaga slid the table into the ring then got in after it. The referee called for the bell and that started Machetti's sixth consecutive match. Umaga picked up the table and charged at Machetti, looking to ram the end of it into Machetti's face. But the Intercontinental Champion ducked under the table and ran passed Umaga then turned around. Only Umaga turned around at the same time Machetti did and swung the table around with him. The side of the table smashed into Machetti's face and he went crashing down to the mat.

Umaga held onto the table and walked over to Machetti, then raised it up above his head and drove the end of it down into Machetti's back, raised it, then drove it down into Machetti's back again. Umaga left Machetti laying on the mat and walked into the middle of the ring and set up the table. Happy with his work Umaga turned around and noticed Machetti pulling himself up to his feet. Machetti stepped away from the ropes and stood up, Umaga raised his arm up in the air and screamed something then ran in and practically took Machetti's head off with a vicious running Samoan Spike.

Umaga stood over Machetti and screamed down at him then kicked Machetti in the side, causing him to roll over to the ring ropes. Umaga came over and pulled Machetti up to his feet, only to push Machetti back down and start choking him on the middle rope. Umaga pressed both hands into Machetti's back, effectively cutting off the flow of oxygen to Machetti's brain. The referee couldn't do anything because this was a Tables Match, meaning there were no disqualifications, no pinfalls, no submissions, no count outs, and no knock out, all he had to do was call for the bell when someone was put through a table. Maria ran around the ring and stood in front of Machetti, whose face was turning bright red.

Suddenly Maria noticed something on the ground, she bent down and lifted the remains of the table that Machetti had 'put her through' before then picked up the abandoned sledgehammer and discretely handed it to Machetti. Machetti acted quickly and drove the sledgehammer up into Umaga's jaw. Umaga was so caught up with choking Machetti that he didn't noticed the sledgehammer coming at him. Umaga was caught off guard and staggered backwards and turned around to face the table while holding his jaw. Machetti turned around and ran at Umaga and drove then end of the sledgehammer into Umaga's back. Umaga was launched forward and ended up slumping over on top of the table.

Machetti got back up and got out of the ring and onto the ring apron. Machetti glanced over his shoulder at Maria and handed her the sledgehammer. Machetti hoisted himself up onto the top rope, then springboarded across the ring and drove his feet down into Umaga's back SMASHING HIM THROUGH THE TABLE IN THE PROCESS! The referee called for the bell, and Riot Time played yet again (the song was close to the end by now) while Machetti struggled back up to his feet. Maria got in the ring and hugged Machetti, who in winning that last match had just taken Umaga's spot in the Royal Rumble.

Umaga must have realized that Machetti had just stolen his spot in the Royal Rumble, because he managed to stagger up to his feet (despite having just been put through a table). Umaga screamed and charged at Machetti and Maria. Maria handed the sledgehammer to Machetti and dove out of the way. Machetti turned around and drove the end of the sledgehammer into Umaga's face, causing the Samoan Bulldozer to stagger backwards and stand in the middle of the ring in a daze. Machetti looked surprised for a second but quickly rushed forward and drove the end of the hammer into Umaga's face for a second time. Umaga fell backwards and went crashing down on top of the broken table.

Machetti turned back to Maria and they quickly left the ringThe referee came around the ring and handed Machetti the Intercontinental Championship, which Machetti put over his shoulder. Machetti took Maria's hand and they headed up the entrance ramp together. But suddenly HHH'S THEME MUSIC HIT! The Game came out from the back and headed down the ramp where he met Machetti and Maria in the middle of it.

Triple H glared at Machetti and gestured to the sledgehammer that Machetti was still holding. Machetti smiled sheepishly then held the sledgehammer out to Triple H, which the Game quickly took. Triple H and Machetti stared at each other for a moment and the fans cheered wildly, they'd like to see a Machetti/Triple H match. HHH walked passed Machetti and headed down towards the ring for his match with Snitsky, while Machetti and Maria headed up the ramp and to the back. Triple H got in the ring and glanced at Umaga and the remains of the table he was lying on. The Game went over to the corner and leaned back against it as Raw went to a commercial break.

---x---

See, now there's no mid-match commercial break during the HHH/Snitsky match, and Triple H can still use his sledgehammer to destroy the set. EVERYBODY WINS! I was originally planning on having Machetti face Snitsky in the second Tables Match but I had to change it to Umaga so it didn't interfere with the actual Raw. So during the match, if anyone notices the name Snitsky where Umaga should be, don't freak out.

As for next chapter, Machetti hasn't seen the last of Umaga and Vince McMahon. The Chairman still wants to punish Machetti and Umaga will no doubt want his spot in the Rumble back.

'Till Next Time…

Peace!