Chapter Sixty-Nine: Qualifier
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Raw was live from Phoenix Arizona and had just come back from a commercial. Before the break Santino Marella and Carlito had fought Hardcore Holly and Cody Rhodes in a tag team match. But halfway through the match the reigning World Tag Team Champions came out from the back each carrying a steel chair. But London and Kendrick only set up the chairs in front of the ring and sat in them, giving themselves ringside seats for the match. The end of the match came when London and Kendrick suddenly stood up, Marella, who was on the top rope at the time, was distracted. Holly capitalized and threw him off of the top then nailed him with the Alabama Slam for the win. London and Kendrick smiled at Santino who glared at them from the ring, then the Tag Team Champions headed to the back and left Holly and Rhodes to celebrate.
The recap from the WrestleMania XXIV Press Conference was shown, highlighting the Big Show/Mayweather match. The camera went to the General Manager's office and showed William Regal standing with Todd Grisham. "I'm standing by with Mr. William Regal, the Raw General Manager," explained Grisham. "Who I understand has a major announcement regarding tonight's Main Event here on Raw."
"I certainly do Todd," replied Regal. "You know, if there's one thing that the Big Show and Floyd Mayweather have shown us, is that nothing sells a big match like conflict. And tonight's Main Event on Raw, its going to be full of conflict. We're gonna have a tag team match, on one team, Mr. Kennedy and the Legend Killer Randy Orton, and on the other team, John Cena and Triple H." Regal paused and the fans cheered the announcement. Regal turned his attention back to Todd, "Go spread the word."
"Will do, thank you," said Grisham as he headed off. The camera then moved to the side and showed Y2J Chris Jericho standing next to William Regal. The fans let out another loud cheer, Jericho was so battered after the Elimination Chamber at No Way Out, that he wasn't able to appear on Raw that night. But now Jericho was back.
"Hello Sunshine," greeted Regal.
"Hello, Sir William," responded Jericho.
"What happened with your hair? You look like a cockatoo," commented Regal,
"Oh thank you," replied Jericho. "Speaking of hair, yours is kind of gaudy all over like a spider, just perched on top of your head. Yeah, can I make you some tea?"
"Oh, wonderful," said Regal.
"You know, stir some lemon in there for you…"
"Look, what do you want?" asked Regal, cutting to the chase.
"You know what I want," answered Jericho, who suddenly got serious. "I made a request to be in the Money in the Bank Match at WrestleMania and I want to know what you had to say about it."
"Look, you've gotta qualify like everybody else," explained Regal. "But your Chris Jericho, you're special, aren't you? The Golden Boy. So you should have a special opponent. A man, who did me a favor last week, a man, that pinned you in the Elimination Chamber. You'll be facing the Intercontinental Champion, Machetti." Regal paused and once again the crowd cheered. "Oh, and that match is, next."
"Oh, well I wouldn't have it any other way, junior," said Jericho. "By the way, stripes and stripes… it's oosh." Jericho turned and headed off, then Raw went to a commercial break.
(A/N: I thought the idea of Jeff Hardy fighting Jericho in a Qualifying Match, when he's already qualified was kind of stupid. I've wanted to do a Machetti/Jericho match ever since Jericho came back to the WWE, so here's my chance.)
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Raw came back from the commercial break and Riot Time hit. WWE Intercontinental Champion, Machetti came out from the back, with Maria. "Ladies and gentlemen the following is a Money in the Bank Qualifying Match, where the winner will go on to compete in the Money in the Bank Match at WrestleMania XXIV! Introducing first, being accompanied by Maria, he is the current Intercontinental Champion, MACHETTI!" Machetti grabbed Maria's hand and they ran down the entrance ramp. Machetti stopped short in front of the ring, then lifted Maria up and placed her on the ring apron, then climbed up and jumped over the top rope ot get in the ring. Maria stood in the middle of the ring while Machetti and ran to a corner and climbed up onto the middle rope. Machetti did a back-flip and landed in the middle of the ring next to Maria, at the same time a blast of white pyro erupted out of each corner. Maria held Machetti's arm up in the air, then took his Intercontinental Title and got out of the ring. Machetti turned and faced the entrance ramp, awaiting his opponent.
Raw is brought to you by Devil May Cry 4, Never Back Down, Castrol GTX, and Snickers Feast. Jericho's theme sounded through the arena and the count down started, white pyro rocketed down from the rafters over the stage, then shot up from in front of the TitanTron.Break the Wall Down hit. Jericho stood on the stage with his back to the fans while Lillian continued her introduction. "And weighing in at two hundred and twenty-six pounds, Y2J, CHRIS JERICHO!!" Jericho turned around and headed down to the ring. Machetti pulled himself up and lounged on the top rope in the far corner, he made a big show of yawning while Jericho got in the ring. Jericho went to the corner next to the one Machetti was in, climbed up onto the top rope, and posed for the fans. Jericho jumped back down and Machetti quickly got off of the ropes and started circling the ring like Jericho was. The referee called for the bell, and the match was underway.
Machetti and Jericho locked up, Jericho was the stronger competitor and he managed to back Machetti up into the ropes, then broke clean. Maria stood at ringside an cheered Machetti on as he and Jericho met back up into the middle of the ring. Jericho quickly grabbed Machetti's arm and pinned it behind Machetti's back for a wrist lock. Jericho pulled the arm free then yanked Machetti's arm down for an arm wrench. Machetti dropped down to his knees, but got back up, then did a forward roll to straighten his arm. Machetti kept his hold on Jericho's arm and reversed it for a wrist lock of his own. Jericho managed to spin around so he was facing Machetti, but Machetti jumped up then dropped down onto his back, launched Jericho up into the air and off of him for a monkey flip. But Jericho flipped in mid air and managed to land on his feet. Machetti got back up and turned to face Jericho, who took him by surprise and got in a side headlock.
Machetti pushed Jericho into the ropes, then pushed him off and into the ropes on the other side of the ring. Jericho came off and ran into Machetti, taking him down with a shoulder block. Jericho ran to the ropes again, but this time a different side of the ring, while Machetti got back up, then ran forward and knocked him down with a second shoulder block. Jericho went to the ropes on the third side of the ring but Machetti shot up, grabbed Jericho and did a back-flip while launching Jericho through the air for a big hip toss. Machetti and Jericho got back up, but Machetti grabbed Jericho and sent him flying with an arm drag. Machetti and Jericho got back up, but Jericho charged at Machetti and rolled him up, ONE… Machetti kicked out of it.
Machetti and Jericho both got up, Jericho came at Machetti, but Machetti jumped up and hit him with a big dropsault, sending Jericho back into the ropes. Machetti charged at Jericho and went for a clothesline, but Jericho ducked down then elevated Machetti up into the air and over the top rope. Maria quickly moved out of the way, but Machetti managed to land safely on the ring apron. Jericho turned around and punched Machetti in the face, then punched him a second time. Jericho ran to the corner and jumped up onto the middle rope, then came off looking for a triangle dropkick. Maria reached up and pulled Machetti down, causing Jericho to miss him. Machetti shot back up then ran and jumped up onto the top rope. Machetti turned around and launched off of the corner and back-flipped, Machetti went to grab Jericho for a shooting star press DDT, but Jericho dove out of the way, causing Machetti to crash face-first into the mat. Jericho quickly rolled Machetti onto his back and made another pin attempt, ONE… TWO… TH… Machetti kicked out. Maria and a good portion of the crowd cheered.
Jericho got up to his feet and pulled Machetti up to his feet and then got in a side headlock. Jericho lifted Machetti up into the air, then slammed him back-down for a vertical suplex. Jericho got back up and ran to the ropes, then came off and dropped down onto Machetti for an elbow drop, followed by another pin attempt, ONE… TWO… THR… Machetti still kicked out. Jericho pulled Machetti up to his feet, then punched him in the face, sending the IC Champion staggering backwards. Jericho chopped Machetti across the chest, backing him into the ropes, then whipped him across the ring. Jericho charged at Machetti and went for a clothesline, but Machetti ducked it. Jericho and Machetti spun around, Jericho jumped up CODE BREAKER—Machetti countered by grabbed Jericho's legs and flipped him onto his back. Machetti crossed Jericho's legs and put his foot through, then rolled Jericho onto his stomach THE SHARPSHOOTER IS LOCKED IN!
Jericho screamed out in pain as Machetti applied pressure to his legs, the referee crouched down next to Jericho and asked if he wanted to give up, but Jericho shook his head and shouted, "NO!" Y2J pushed himself up off of the mat, then reached out and dragged himself closer to the ropes, Machetti tried to keep Jericho away, but Jericho kept going and managed to keep dragging Machetti closer to the ropes. Finally Jericho lunged forward and grabbed the bottom rope, ROPE BREAK! The referee ordered Machetti to break the hold, which he eventually did. Jericho pulled himself up with the ropes then got to his feet. Machetti ran to the ropes and came off, but Jericho rushed at Machetti and hit a running knee to the stomach, causing Machetti to flip forward and end up on his back. Jericho followed up with a cover, ONE… TWO… T… Machetti kicked out.
Jericho rolled off of Machetti and got up, then went over to Machetti when he was sitting up and prodded him in the head with his foot. After three less-than-friendly nudges, Machetti ended up rolling onto his stomach. Jericho pulled Machetti up to his feet then chopped him across the chest. Machetti staggered backwards and ended up backed up into the corner. Jericho pulled Machetti forward and chopped him across the chest a second time, sending Machetti into the ropes. Jericho pushed Machetti into the ropes, then whipped him across the ring. Machetti came off of the ropes and ducked under Jericho's arm when he ran forward for a clothesline. Machetti ran into the ropes then came off with a handspring, then jumped up and ended up with his legs around Jericho's neck when he came off of the ropes, Machetti swung to the side and took both of them down with a head-scissors take down.
Machetti got back up to his feet, while Jericho rolled over to the ropes and slowly pulled himself up. Jericho swung at Machetti for a punch, but Machetti blocked it then hit Jericho with a big uppercut, sending Jericho staggering backwards. Machetti jumped up and hit a jumping calf kick, knocking Jericho on his back. Machetti ran to the ropes, while Jericho got back up, then Machetti took him down with a clothesline. Machetti pulled Jericho up and backed him into the ropes, Machetti whipped Jericho across the ring, but Jericho reversed it, sending Machetti into the ropes instead. But Machetti took it in stride and jumped up onto the middle rope, then launched himself off and over Jericho's head, caught him on he way down, and drove Jericho's head down to the mat OVER CASTLE TAKE OVER! Maria and a good portion of the crowd cheered as Machetti made a cover, ONE… TWO… TH… Jericho kicked out.
Machetti got up off of Jericho, who rolled over to the corner and pulled himself up. Machetti ran at Jericho, did a handspring and then a front-flip, TURNBUCKLE SENTON! Machetti stepped back and Jericho fell down on his back, Machetti dragged him away from the corner and made another pin attempt, ONE… TWO… THR… Jericho kicked out again. Machetti got up and pulled Jericho up to his feet, and backed him into the ropes, then went to whip him across the ring, but Jericho reversed again. Machetti went to the ropes and came off, Jericho bent down, looking for a back body drop, but Machetti kicked him in the face, then ran and bounced off of the ropes, only Jericho recovered and ran to the ropes after Machetti. Machetti came off first and turned around, slightly confused, but Jericho bounced off the ropes and took Machetti down with a big clothesline. Jericho went for the pin, ONE… TWO… THR… Machetti kicked out. Jericho got off of Machetti, but stayed on his knees and stared at the referee, he was starting to get frustrated.
Jericho went to Machetti and pulled him to his feet, then kneed him in the stomach, before clubbing him on the back, forcing Machetti down to his knees. Jericho let go of Machetti, who staggered up to his feet and backed up into the corner. Jericho grabbed Machetti and whipped him across the ring to the other corner. Machetti jumped up onto the top rope and came off for a moonsault, but Jericho jumped up into the air and dropkicked Machetti in the chest while he was upside-down. The camera cut and showed Maria looking worried while Jericho went for the pin, ONE… TWO… THRE… Machetti managed to kick out!
Jericho got up and dragged Machetti up to his feet, then whipped him into the ropes. Machetti came off the ropes with a handspring, and ended up with his legs around Jericho's neck, he went for the head-scissors, but Jericho held Machetti still, then hooked his arms around Machetti's legs, JERICHO COUNTERED WITH THE WALLS OF JERICHO!! Machetti screamed out in pain as Jericho applied pressure on his lower back, looking for the submission. Maria shouted at Machetti, "Hang in there!" Machetti screamed out in agony, the referee asked him if he wanted to give up, but Machetti shouted, "NEVER!!"
Machetti gritted his teeth and pushed himself up off of the mat, then started dragging himself and Jericho across the ring and over to Maria, or more importantly, the ropes. "You've got it," cheered Maria as Machetti reached out looking to grab the bottom rope, ROPE BREAK—JERICHO DRAGGED MACHETTI AWAY FROM THE ROPES! Machetti suddenly found himself in the middle of no where. He was stuck back in the middle of the ring, and was still in the Walls of Jericho. Maria looked worried as Machetti screamed out in pain again while Jericho applied even more pressure to his signature hold. Machetti's face was turning red, and the referee once again asked him if he wanted to give up. But Machetti replied by shouting, "SCREW YOU!"
The referee took two steps back in surprise, Machetti took a deep breath, then reached back and grabbed Jericho's ankles, while pulling with his legs, flipping Jericho onto his stomach. Machetti quickly shot up, then grabbed Jericho's legs, crossed them, MACHETTI COUNTERED INTO THE SHARPSHOOTER!! Maria and the same good portion of the crowd cheered the counter, now it was Jericho's turn to the scream. Machetti applied pressure to Jericho's legs for the second time in the match up. Jericho reached out for the ropes, but they were too far away, Jericho started dragging Machetti closer, but Machetti fought back trying to keep Jericho from reached the bottom rope. Jericho screamed out as Machetti suddenly bent his legs back further, sending another jolt of pain through Jericho's legs. Jericho laid flat on the mat and lifted his arm up, was he going to tap? JERICHO LUNGED FORWARD AND GRABBED THE BOTTOM ROPE! ROPE BREAK!
The referee ordered Machetti to break the hold, Machetti glared back at Jericho, who was still holding onto the bottom rope, then reluctantly released the sharpshooter. Jericho pulled himself up with the ropes while Machetti got up on his own, then backed up into the ropes on the other side of the ring, where Maria was standing on the ring apron. Maria patted Machetti on the shoulder and told him to keep it up, then jumped back down. Machetti waited until Jericho was standing on his own, then ran across the ring, Jericho side-stepped Machetti, then grabbed him and slammed Machetti down to the mat, FLASHBACK!! Jericho got back up and watched Machetti roll away from him and onto his stomach. Jericho went over to Machetti and started to viciously stomp him on the lower back, working over the area he had damaged with the Walls of Jericho. After about ten frustrated stomps, Jericho pulled Machetti up to his feet.
Jericho kicked Machetti in the stomach, then turned around and ran to the ropes, Jericho went for a clothesline, but Machetti ducked it. Jericho and Machetti spun around, Machetti kicked Jericho in the stomach, IMPALER!! Machetti rolled Jericho onto his back, then went to the corner and climbed up onto the top rope. Machetti did a back-flip out of the corner and launched himself at Jericho, SHOOTING STAR PRESS LEG DROP—JERICHO MOVED!! Machetti landed ass-first on the mat, then fell backwards and laid on his back. Jericho shot back up, ran across the ring, jumped over Machetti and ran to the ropes. Jericho jumped up onto the middle rope, then back-flipped off, LIONSAULT!! Maria grabbed the bottom rope, looking scared while Jericho hooked the leg for the pin, ONE… TWO… THRE… MACHETTI KICKED OUT!!
Jericho rolled off of Machetti and got up onto his knees, then stared up at the rafters, not able to believe that Machetti had kicked out of that. Jericho stood up and walked over to Machetti then pulled him up to his feet, but Machetti caught Jericho with a big uppercut, taking him by surprise. Jericho staggered backwards, then jumped up and went for an enzuigiri, but Machetti ducked down and dodged it, then jumped up and went for a spinning wheel kick, Jericho ducked under it. Machetti turned around and quickly kicked Jericho in the stomach, IMPALER—Jericho grabbed Machetti's legs and flipped him onto his back. WALLS OF JERICHO—MACHETTI PUSHED JERICHO OFF!
Jericho went into the ropes, Machetti shot up and grabbed him and held Jericho in front of him. MACHETE'S BLA—JERICHO FOUGHT FREE! Jericho pushed Machetti into the ropes, then jumped up and grabbed Machetti when he came back, CODE BREAKER—MACHETTI SLAMMED JERICHO DOWN ONTO HIS BACK! Machetti kept his hold on Jericho's legs and crossed them, SHARPSHOOTER!! THE SHARPSHOOTER IS LOCKED IN!! Maria cheered and clapped for Machetti after he had come out on top in the exchange. Jericho screamed in pain, he was in the sharpshooter for the third time in the match.
The referee asked Jericho if he wanted to give up, Jericho just shook his head, then started to pull himself towards the ropes, MACHETTI DRAGGED JERICHO BACK INTO THE MIDDLE OF THE RING! Jericho screamed in pain, but refused to tap out, he wouldn't give up! Machetti increased the pressure, Jericho thrashed on the mat in agony, his legs were killing him. Jericho started to fade, the pain was too strong, but he wasn't going to give up. Eventually Jericho stopped moving, but Machetti kept the sharpshooter looked in, occasionally increasing the pressure. The referee grabbed Jericho's arm and raised it up into the air, then let it drop, ONE… the referee took Jericho's arm again, raised it, then dropped it, TWO… the referee lifted up Jericho's arm a third time, if it hit the mat this time, Machetti would win via knockout, the referee dropped Jericho's arm BUT IT STAYED IN THE AIR! JERICHO WAS STILL IN IT! Machetti glanced over his shoulder in surprise, as did Maria who was quickly shown still standing at ringside.
Jericho started to wake up, his face was bright red by now. By gritted his teeth and with new motivation pushed himself up off of the mat and attempted to drag Machetti to the ropes, but Machetti spread his legs, giving himself a broader stance, increasing his ability to keep Jericho from crawling to the ropes. Jericho realized Machetti wasn't going anywhere, Jericho pushed himself up off of the mat, JERICHO ROLLED THROUGH! JERICHO PUSHED MACHETTI OFF OF HIM! Machetti staggered back to the ropes, then rushed at Machetti, JERICHO SHOT UP... CODEBREAKER!! JERICHO HIT THE CODEBREAKER!!!
Maria climbed up onto the ring apron and stared in the ring, she looked like she was in a panic, it could be all over! Machetti was down on his back, but so was Jericho, he had used the last of his leg strength when he had hit the Code Breaker. Jericho rolled over onto his stomach and crawled over to Machetti then draped his arm over Machetti's chest, ONE… TWO… THRE… MACHETTI GOT HIS SHOULDER UP!! Maria looked surprised and elated at the same time as she cheered along with the crowd. Jericho lifted his head up and stared at Machetti in shock, he pulled himself closer then hooked Machetti's leg for a better pin, ONE… TWO… THRE… MACHETTI STILL KICKED OUT!! Jericho rolled off of Machetti and laid on his back, staring up at the rafters, how did Machetti kick out of that!?
Machetti slowly started to move and fought up to his feet. Jericho tried to get up too, but the second he stood up, his legs gave out on him and he went crashing back down to the mat. Machetti went over to Jericho and pulled him up, then kicked Jericho in the stomach, IMPALER—JERICHO COUNTERED WITH A NORTHERN LIGHTS SUPLEX! Jericho couldn't keep his legs up for the bridge, so he settled for just lying on top of Machetti, ONE… TWO… THRE… MACHETTI KICKED OUT! Jericho rolled off of Machetti and stared at him in disbelief. Machetti lifted his legs up and bent his knees. "STAY DOWN!!" screamed Jericho. While at ringside, Maria shouted, "GET UP!"
In response, MACHETTI NIPPED UP!! Jericho couldn't believe it, but Maria looked really pleased. Machetti reached down and pulled Jericho up, then whipped him into the ropes, Jericho came off then jumped up and grabbed Machetti, CODEBREAKER—MACHETTI CAUGHT JERICHO IN MIDAIR! MACHETE'S BLADE!! Maria climbed up onto the ring apron looking anxious, this could be it! The pin, ONE… TWO… THRE... JERICHO MANAGED TO KICK OUT!! Machetti let go of the pin and stared down at Jericho in surprise, then he glanced at Maria, she couldn't believe it either. Clearly both men were set on going to WrestleMania, but in reality, only one of them actually could.
Machetti got up to his feet and stared at Jericho, who was still out cold in the middle of the ring. Machetti went to the corner and climbed up onto the top rope, but Jericho suddenly got up and climbed up onto the middle rope across from Machetti. Jericho punched Machetti in the face, but Machetti retaliated by chopping Jericho across the chest. Jericho and Machetti were in the middle of nowhere, up above the ring. Jericho swung at Machetti for another punch, but Machetti ducked it, then hit a headbutt. Jericho swayed backwards, but held desperately onto the ropes on both sides of him. Jericho came back with a shot to the stomach, then punched Machetti in the jaw. Jericho jumped up off of the middle rope and up onto Machetti's shoulders, Jericho went for a hurricurana off of the top, but Machetti held onto the ropes. Machetti suddenly reached up and grabbed Jericho's sides, then launched out of the corner and drove Jericho down to the mat, MACHETTI HITS A TOP ROPE POWERBOMB ON JERICHO! Machetti laid on top of Jericho for the pin, ONE... TWO... THREE! HE GOT IT! MACHETTI GOT THE WIN!
Riot Time hit and Maria quickly got in the ring and pulled Machetti up to his feet, he was now in the Money in the Bank match at WrestleMania! Machetti stood on his own then turned and stared at the WrestleMania sign hanging from the rafters and pointed to it, he was now on the card. Machetti turned back to Maria then quickly grabbed her and kissed her, Maria quickly recipicated, both of them seemed to be rather excited. They broke apart and Machetti grabbed Maria's hand then led her out of the ring, and they headed up the entrance ramp and to the back..The camera showed Jericho still lying on his back in the middle of the ring where Machetti had powerbombed him, the referee was standing next to him, asking if he was okay. Both Machetti and Jericho had given the match everything they had, but in the end only one could win. This time, Machetti had risen to the occasion and got the win, now he was on his own Road to WrestleMania. The camera cut and showed Vince McMahon, preparing to apologize to Hornswoggle for what happened last week.
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There you go, Machetti is in the Money in the Bank match at WrestleMania XXIV. I was originally planning a Machetti/Michaels match but Michaels is fighting Flair, and I didn't want to mess with that match, so I had to nix that idea. I still have no idea what's going to happen, since I don't even know all the competitors yet. But the bottom line is, Machetti WILL be in the Money in the Bank Match at WrestleMania, sorry Jericho.
'Till Next Time…
Peace!