Chapter Five

It was not Ryoji Kaji's job, precisely, to observe his ward. His charge as her guardian, rather, was to supervise her. Over his many and varied objections, the administration of Nerv fully believed she was almost as fully functional as an adult. They had their reasons. She had been a dedicated and professional component of the program ever since Unit Two had first been constructed, and before, trained almost from birth to pilot it. She'd somehow managed to earn a university degree in biology in the process, and regularly held adult level conversations with staff members about her Evangelion's function, specifications and capabilities. It impress Kaji sometimes.

They didn't see the other parts. No one at Nerv seemed to notice the strange way she looked at the machine, the odd gleam in her eye. She could discuss its features in detail, but that was because she thought of it as toy, not some profound academic interest. To her, her degree served only to establish her adulthood, something so childishly vital to her, and to help her better understand the thing with which she was obsessed. As he leaned against the door of her little cabin, he reflected as he observed her unnoticed. He'd grown up in the horror of Second Impact. He'd never had toys or childish things- he was a child soldier, like her. Now that they could give those things to a lucky few children again, they'd trained this one not to want them.

Two things interested her. Piloting, and being seen as an adult, and these were only vaguely separate. Some might have called it cute the way she was studying her new colleague. He thought it was a little obsessive, and was worried what might happen if she went through all of this, turned herself into this weapon, only to find out someone was better than her. He was wondering if she was thinking the same thing as she sat in a t-shirt and shorts, watching a replay of the battle with the second attacker over and over again, tapping the erase end of a pencil against her chin.

Moments like this were rare. Few people saw Asuka as she really was, rather than some front she put up. Around him, she couldn't help but put on a smug, strutting, coquettish act designed to entice his romantic attentions. It was comical, and in away, reassuring. As long as she was directing it at him, he knew it was just practice, really. After being let down gently so many times there was no way she could take it seriously anymore. He sort of dreaded what might be happening here, if she stumbled into the complex and frightening enterprise that was interacting with teenage boys. He'd seen the tapes himself- he wasn't sure if this Shinji kid was some sort of natural warrior or just out of his mind.

He took a deep breath and walked up to her. It was comforting not to see her trying too hard, as it were. She had her nerve clips by her side and had scooped her red-gold hair up in a loose ponytail to keep it out of her face. She was breathing shallowly, staring intently at the screen. He watched her for a moment more, confused. She was deeply focused on Unit One's hand, replaying the same short clip of footage over and over. She pulled her lower lip down with her pencil for a moment, then made a note.

"It's so natural," she said.

"What is?"

She practically jumped. He could watch the wheels turn in her head, first the urge to contain her surprise, then to put on her coquette act and start batting eyelashes at him, and then to control her intense need to talk, to discuss and interact over anything related to Evangelions. She settled on the latter as she sank back down, crossing her legs under herself.

"Look at the hand."

He leaned over, keeping his distance as he did, his every movement carefully calculated not to encourage her to slip into seduction mode. He watched the fingers of the armored purple hand flex a bit, then shrugged. "So?"

"That movement, it's unconscious. He's controlling it without even thinking about it."

He stood up. "So?"

She looked at him and rolled her big blue eyes in exasperation. "So," she said, surprisingly girlish, "I can't do that. Every move I make is deliberate. I give commands. He doesn't do it that way."

"Eh," Kaji shrugged. "I suppose there's room for improvement with both of you," he said guardedly. "He could learn a lot from you, I'm sure."

"Of course he could," she snapped, "but that isn't the point. They won't let me see what he's actually doing in the plug. I don't even know what he looks like."

"Oh?" said Kaji, a note of trepidation in his voice.

"I asked Misato to send me a picture or something, but she said they're all classified. Then she started in with some bullshit about having a crush and I hung up on her."

Normally, as her appointed legal guardian, it would befall him to correct her language, but he'd learned a while ago, as everyone who dealt with her eventually did, that doing anything that even remotely implied she was less than an adult would earn her anger. He winced when he realized he'd stayed too long as she let her hair down and started fixing up her nerve clips.

"So," she said in her best, sweetest voice, "Are you going to eat dinner with me tonight?"

He sighed. "I was going to take my meal in the officer's mess, actually. I have a lot of paperwork to do."

She fluttered her eyelids at him in an exaggerated fashion. He was locked in now, he had to play the game.

"You should let your hair down, relax a little. What's so important?"

"Classified," he smirked, turning on the charm. He hated giving her his patented look, but it was the only way to extricate himself from enemy territory, as it were. "I've got to run. Why don't you get some fresh air? It's lovely out on the deck today. You're all cooped up in here."

She shrugged. "Whatever."

She turned back to her recordings, and he slipped out the door. He paused just outside.

"I can't let him be better," she whispered. "I won't."

Misato took great pleasure in walking into Shinji's room and kicking him. She was gentle, of course. It was mostly a nudge with the ball of her foot. For someone so obsessed with exercise, he sure could sleep. As it was, he made a sort of annoyed groan and rolled over in his futon, dragging his sheets with him as he curled into the corner.

"Go away," he muttered.

"Rise and shine!" Misato beamed. "You're coming with me!"

"Where?" he groaned.

"I'm driving you to school!"

He sat bolt upright and fixed his gaze on her. "What? Why?"

"It's Parent Visitation Day. I don't think your father is coming,"

"Good," he muttered.

"…so It's my job." she finished. "Go get ready."

With a sigh, he jumped to his feet in a smooth, practiced motion, thrusting his arms out in front of his body to balance himself. He creaked a little as he stretched and walked past her to the shower. Asuka had been bugging her constantly about him. She was worried if she sent the girl the pictures she'd ask for, she'd commandeer a helicopter and fly to Tokyo-3 herself. The Pacific Fleet was escorting the Eva from the Russian coast, where it had arrived by rail, and would be within VTOL range in a few days.

His room was neat. He slept on a narrow futon in the corner and the rest of the space was devoted to piles of books and a neatly arranged stack of American comics. He had a lot of reading material on exercise- she supposed that made sense, the collection dominated by a huge self-proclaimed exercise encyclopedia. The books and comics were mostly about someone called Conan- she knew enough English to get the gist of them. He had a few about another character, a fire-haired barbarian girl in a ridiculous chainmail bikini. She couldn't help but laugh at that.

She settled in to eat breakfast. She'd made a point of having her first beer before she tried to wake him up. Going in all bleary-eyed herself would take all the fun out of it. Having had the hair of the dog she needed, she turned to coffee to give herself a little boost of energy. Shinji emerged a few minutes later, in his pants but no shirt, toweling his hair while fixing a plate of fish for Pen Pen, who warbled appreciatively as he started swallowing his food whole. He tossed the towel onto the pile by the bathroom door and fixed up his hair- it was just long enough now that he could tie it back.

"Doesn't anyone at school say anything to you about your hair?" Misato said guardedly, taking a sip of canned coffee.

"Yes," he shrugged as he began mixing up the awful concoction he had for breakfast. He called it 'whey protein', but there was other stuff in it, and sometimes he put a foul tasting powder in it he told her was some sort of freeze dried vegetables.

Gendo was beginning to regret taking Ritsuko Akagi to bed. One of the many disadvantages of his manipulation of her fragile psyche was that having been intimate with him, she no longer felt the least bit intimidated by his cavernous office or his cadaverous demeanor. Without being properly invited in, she strode up to his desk and nearly threw a heavy stack of manila folders down onto the expansive black surface. The sudden disruption of the zen-like perfection of his furniture annoyed him greatly.

"We need to talk," she announced, planting one hand on her hip.

He remained silent. He'd been through this before. She wasn't expecting an invitation to continue. He merely fixed his gaze on her and waited.

"These are the readings from Unit One's core during the last battle. There are some anomalies."

"Such as?"

"At two points during the battle," she opened the topmost folder and pointed to two spots on the graph, "the core stopped absorbing energy from the umbilical and began to generate it. Here and here, roughly coinciding with Unit Zero's deployment and when the threw the remains of the shield at the angel."

He put his hands on the desk, spread his fingers, and leaned forward, examining the graph. "And?"

"One, that's impossible. Two, the second spike was orders of magnitude stronger than the first. If the Eva generates an energy backflow like this for more than a few seconds, it could fry the umbilical."

"We can replace a length of cable, doctor." Gendo said, his tone flat. She really was beginning to bore him.

"If he can activate it without external power, we'll have no way of controlling it. What if he loses control, or goes rogue?"

"He won't," said Gendo. "His capability to tap into deeper capabilities within the Eva is an asset. As to his loyalty, I control him completely."

She put an unlit cigarette in her mouth, fumbled in her pocket for a lighter, and then gave up, remembering that she wasn't permitted to smoke in here. The cigarette remained, the tip reddening from her lipstick.

"Are you sure? I think you should read the update on his psych profile."

She closed the top folder and slid it off, opening the second one. She turned it around, cradled it on her forearms like a book, and began to read. "Subject shows abnormal confidence for his gender and age level. Subject has established a leadership role within his peer group," she started to paraphrase, scanning down the page. "He's arrogant, charismatic, and independent. He might as well not even be the same boy you told me he was before he got here."

"It's an act. An affectation. A well-executed one, but hollow nonetheless. His pathology has progressed. He now resembles the Second. You are well aware how easy it is to control her."

"I can't believe you would do that to a little girl."

"We," he said pointedly, "already have. One person is nothing against the fate of the entire world, doctor. How are you progressing with this Jet Alone nonsense?"

She stared at him coolly for a moment. He had only shared the true objective of the scenario with Fuyutsuki. She no doubt had her suspicions, but he let them remain. To comment would be to strengthen them, and to imply he felt some sort of concern for the emotional distress she would experience if he had to clarify the terms of their relationship.

Now, that would be cruel.

Rei took a great deal of interest in Shinji's interaction with her classmates. After a furtive few weeks he had taken to beginning each day by walking to the back of the classroom, where he sat with his chair propped against the back wall. Sometimes, he would merely observe, his head resting on his folded hands behind his neck. Other times, he would pull out an unrelated book and begin reading it, his feet propped up on the chair behind him.

Today was such a day.

Class Representative Horaki furtively approached him, clutching her clipboard to her chest like some kind of shield. She was, Rei noted, blushing profusely, and immediately swept her eyes away from his when his piercing stare fell on her. Rei noted that this was a surprisingly common reaction among the female students (including the students of Class 2-B next door and the younger middle school students from the first floor, as well as the few upper-class girls he had contact with on a regular basis). Hikari swallowed for no readily apparent reason and said, mostly to the floor, "You need to stand up at the beginning of class."

Shinji turned back to his book. "No."

"…a-and you need to cut your hair."

He sighed. "No."

"And pay attention."

"No."

"I n-need to maintain order in the class," she said nervously.

He looked up at her again and the ghost of a smile turned up the corners of his lips. He tipped his book forward to draw her attention to it. "Nietzsche says, 'from chaos comes order.'"

She started to say something and then squeaked in alarm as she realized the rest of the class had filed in and the bell was about to ring. She made it to her desk just in time to shout "Stand! Bow! Sit!" as the teacher entered the room. Shinji pointedly did none of these things, taking an apparent pleasure in his insubordination, if the look on his face was any indication.

Rei had made several attempts to quantify his sense of humor. So far, they had all failed.

He noticed that she was watching him, or his reflection in the window at any rate, and fixed his gaze on hers. She felt sudden, curious warmth in her cheeks again. She involuntarily made a small sound and half the class abruptly turned and stared at her. Fumbling to avoid knocking her laptop off her desk, she adjusted herself, coughed into her fist, and started staring out the window, pointedly.

In his customary position next to Shinji, Suzahara leaned over and whispered, "How do you do that?"

He shrugged indifferently, not looking up from his book.

On the other side of his seat, Aida aimed a video camera at him. "Speak, O wise master. Let me capture your wisdom for the ages."

In reply, Shinji casually reached out, touched his finger to the side of the camera, and swept its field of view away from him, then returned to his reading. With a soft sight, Aida put it away and leaned against the wall, consciously imitating Shinji's pose, and, Rei noted, Suzahara was now doing the same. This went on throughout the teacher's meandering and ineffectual lecture, which was meant to include some content relating to mathematics, but ended up focusing on his experiences trying to raise squash after Second Impact. It was about as interesting as it sounded.

Apropros of nothing, Rei decided to try an experiment. She stood up. The class representative stared at her for a second, opened her mouth to say something, and then abruptly closed it again as she walked to where Aida sat. "Get up," she said.

Aida stared at her for a moment. "Uh, what?"

"I said, get up."

Visibly confused, the boy slid out of the desk and stood up. Rei picked up his bag and moved it out of the way, then sat down in his desk, next to Shinji. She carefully observed him for a moment, then assumed the same position, her head propped against the wall, her legs crossed at the ankles on the seat in front of her. Shinji didn't make any remark, but did squirm a bit, as if he was restraining laughter.

"What is funny?"

"Nothing," he smirked.

"Aida!" Hikari shouted. "Sit down!"

In a hurry, Aida shuffled to another seat and sat down, dejected. He glanced at Suzahara, who was now biting the edge of his hand to keep from laughing. Rei did not understand the source of their amusement. After an interminable length of time, the lunch bell finally rang, and Shinji jumped to his feet. Rei followed, more slowly, studying him. He turned to her as he tucked his book under his arm.

"This place smells," he said. "Let's skip school."

Her eyes narrowed. "I have been ordered to attend school."

"I won't tell on you."

"The Commander will be informed by the school staff and security detail."

"I can take care of that. Watch this."

He walked to the front of the room, and Rei followed, fascinated. He stopped by the desk where the Horaki girl was eating lunch with several of her friends.

"Class Rep," Shinji said, and Rei noticed the slight hint of a smile on his face when the girl half jumped out of her seat.

"Yes?"

He gestured to Rei. "We've been called in to Nerv."

"Oh," the girl nodded. "Make sure you sign out."

Rei noted, with some confusion, that Shinji did not sign out as they walked outside. They simply blended into the flow of students making their way into the morning air to eat, blending in perfectly as each carried a prepared lunch. Shinji wound around the back of the school and headed up into the hills, away from the building. Rei had seen this area from the inside of the school but had never walked here. There was a narrow path through some brush that led toward the hills overlooking the city. He chose a spot under a tree, sat down, and began eating his lunch.

"Why are we eating here?"

"The smell," he said, looking out over the city skyline as he took a bite. "I have to get away from it sometimes. I found this place while I was running."

"What smell?"

"Motor oil. Ozone. We concrete. People. Rubber. There's no breeze down there. Everything is dead."

"I have never noticed," she said, taking a deep breath through her nose. "It does smell different here."

"How can you not notice it?"

"I have never been anywhere else." She opened her food and began to eat, shoveling small bites of tofu into her mouth.

"You were born here?"

"I do not remember."

He blinked. "I don't remember being born, either. I mean, you've always lived here?"

"Yes."

"What happened to your family?"

"I do not have a family," she said.

He seemed confused by that. He looked down at the contents of her lunch box. "What are you eating?"

"Tofu."

"Plain tofu? That's it?"

He scooted closer to her and offered his own food to her. "Would you like some of mine?"

She leaned over it and examined it. There was nothing especially creative about his chosen fare. It was a mixture of meats, mostly fish, it seemed, and some artificial protein cubes, mixed with rice. She turned to him and said, "I dislike eating meat."

"Oh," he said. "I'm sorry. I didn't know."

He was very close to her now. He'd leaned over her while she inspected his food, and his face had been close to the side of her head. Their noses were almost touching now. He was also, she realized with some surprise, blushing.

"What are you doing?"

"Oh, I, uh, that is…"

Her eyes narrowed. His sudden stuttering was not in character. "What?"

"You smell really nice."

She leaned back. "I am not wearing perfume."

"No," he leaned against the tree. I mean you smell really nice. I like the way you smell."

"That is…" she trailed off, searching for the correct word. "That is weird."

He burst out laughing. "I know," he managed to blurt out as he calmed down. "I'm sorry."

"I am not offended."

He continued to eat. He seemed a tense. Her experiences had taught her that in situations such as this, it is best to clear the air to relieve the tension. She turned to him. "Why did you ask me to come here with you?"

"Uh," he said, "I wanted to be close to… err… I mean, I wanted to talk to you… and stuff."

"Clarify 'stuff'."

He stared at her for a moment, his face slowly becoming more flushed. He opened his mouth and then closed it again, several times, as if he was about to express a line of thought and had suddenly abandoned it. He sucked in a quick breath and leaned forward.

"Like this," he said. Then, he kissed her.

Rei was unused to physical contact. She was examined by Doctor Akagi on a regular basis, and had been probed and doctored in the infirmary after the accident with Unit Zero. The Commander occasionally placed a hand on her shoulder, and the day she had been fitted for her plugsuit, ran his fingers through her hair, but had never repeated that action. She had never understood why other people placed so much importance on the act of touching one's lips to another's.

Until now. After a few seconds of consideration, she decided that she liked it.

Misato was having one hell of a day. For one, she'd had to listen to the school counselor informing her, in detail, why her ward was a menace to society and should be incarcerated. She was relatively sure he had never mentioned leading any 'raids' into the girl's gym lockers, 'panty' or otherwise. She fought very hard to keep her indignation from turning into amusement as she mentally assembled the dressing down she was going to give him. He needed a reminder that his behavior reflected on the organization as a whole, and that many of the panties he stole-

She burst out laughing and almost wrecked the car.

Then there was the whole giant robot thing. Being forced to sit through a technical presentation with Ritsuko yammering in her ear about science stuff was about as fun as having two root canals and then chugging a glass of ice water. She was a little suspicious about Jet Alone suddenly going on a rampage and then shutting off for no discernable reason, but there were times to ask questions and when her job was hanging by a thread, this wasn't one of them.

She half-heartedly undid her uniform jacket as she tromped into the apartment with a half-hearted "I'm home."

Shinji didn't answer her, which was odd, because his shoes were by the door. She slipped her own beside him and realized through her bleary beer-deprived consciousness that there was a third pair there, a scuffed pair of girl's dress shoes.

She walked into the kitchen. There, she found a smiling Rei Ayanami, hungrily shoving food into her mouth. Shinji sat next to her, beaming, a battered old cookbook under one hand. His other hand rested on hers, her pale, slender fingers curled around his.

Oh.

Oh shit.