Perfect by Simple Plan
Squirrelpaw and Firestar
Disclaimer: I don't own the song or the characters.
Note: This is before the Great Journey, after Squirrelpaw and her father have been fighting
Hey dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according to plan?
And do you think I'm wasting my time doing things I wanna do?
But it hurts when you disapprove all along
I can't believe it! I got in trouble, just for being in another cat's company. No way. How could my father even say that? Only a mousebrain would think anything of it. I hissed under my breath, letting my claws sink into the soft earth. I could picture him now in my head, his green eyes blazing, and his stern voice talking to her like she was some kit!
Now Squirrelpaw, you stay away from Brambleclaw! I don't want you near him! Blah, blah blah…
I narrowed my eyes. Firestar would never see how hard I worked for everything. He was always dwelling on my mistakes, always giving me trouble for everything! Did I forget to mention, he even assumes that I'm the cause of anything bad going on in the Clan.
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't pretend that I'm alright
And you can't change me
Of course he'll be mad, when he finds out I've run off with the tom I'm forbidden to be near, but come on! This is the journey of a lifetime. I'll save the Clans, it'll be great. Maybe for once he can be proud of me.
Anything I do is never going to be good enough. But when you think of it, whenever I try to impress him it's with small things, like bringing in a lot of fresh-kill, or being the first cat to scent enemies. I try hard, I really do, but maybe it'll take something big to finally get him to realize how hard I'm trying.
'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
I padded into the camp, my mouth watering from the fresh-kill I held. My head was up high, my eyes were gleaming with excitement. I had caught two mice, a vole and a squirrel!
My eyes instantly searched for a scorching red pelt, my heart was desperate for the praise that I needed. Then I saw him. My father came out of his den, and his green eyes were burning mad. My tail quivered.
"Squirrelpaw, you can't just leave the camp without your mentor, without telling anyone!" he growled, lashing his tail angrily.
"Yeah, but look how much fresh-kill I caught!" I mewed excitedly, dropping it out of my mouth.
"That's great," he began, although his eyes lacked enthusiasm, "But what if one of my warriors were attacked on a search party for you, or something happened to them? You need to think!"
I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days you spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don't care anymore
Why don't we spend time like we used to? Not that he ever had much time for me, anyways. Does he know how much I look up to him? Does he know how much it hurts me every time he yells at me?
We used to be so close… now it seems like I'm just in the way of everything he does. He doesn't need me anymore. He doesn't want me in his life.
And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I'm never gonna be good enough for you
I can't stand another fight
And nothing's alright
I hate it when we fight. I know he cares about me, but with every word he speaks in anger it hits me hard. I remember it all. Not like I could forget. The words ring in my head every time I do something wrong, and sometimes I believe it. The journey will be good, it'll get me away from him. Maybe we'll forget the fights after. Maybe…
'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
"I'm sorry!" My voice was quiet and shaky under the stern gaze of Firestar. His eyes showed me everything… He was upset, angry. He would say things he would regret, things that would remain in my memory forever. I didn't want another fight. Without a second thought I turned and ran, not looking back.
Nothing's gonna change the things that you said
Nothing's gonna make this right again
Please don't turn your back
I can't believe it's hard
Just to talk to you
But you don't understand
'Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
Now it's just too late and
We can't go back
I'm sorry
I can't be perfect
I can't believe that it's gotten this bad. I wish he would know how sorry I am. I wish I could do things right. I can never do anything right. I'm sorry I can't be perfect…