A/N: So! I've finally finished this story after how long? I feel proud, but I should be ashamed because it took me forever! But I promised I'd finish, and I did! Look at me! I actually did something. Extremely late, but I've accomplished something... forgive me! Please! And enjoy!

Haruhi's Birthday

Chapter 16

Kyon felt like walking right out the door when he saw what Haruhi made Itsuki wear.

"A… knight," He asked, "We are dressing as knights…"

Itsuki smiled, "You should see what Miss Suzumiya is wearing."

Kyon shrugged, "That weird princess dress?"

"No."

Haruhi approached the guys. She was wearing the devil girl costume that she originally picked out for Mikuru. Kyon didn't say anything. Itsuki was struck speechless as well. Yuki arrived with Haruhi and she was wearing Mikuru's bunny outfit. Both Kyon and Itsuki looked confused.

"Like it?" Haruhi asked, "Since Mikuru isn't here, we need a temporary mascot. Yuki will be filling in for her at the moment. Plus we match because we're both wearing red." Haruhi smiled. Yuki looked expressionless. Haruhi continued. "Okay, so are you two ready to duel to the death? I think so. Remember, winner gets the last dance with me. Now let's put on a show!" She turned to leave but stopped. "By the way Kyon, when's the piñata coming?"

"In about thirty minutes, along with the food" Kyon lied.

"Great," Haruhi replied, smiling. She grabbed Yuki. "Go make the announcement." Yuki obediently went off to the stage. Kyon glanced at Itsuki.

"How are we gonna do this?" he asked.

"Uh, well, I guess you could forfeit. Make it look real," Itsuki replied. "Yeah, that's what we'll have to do."

"So how long do we make it—wait, how come I have to forfeit?"

"I'm not going to forfeit."

"So what, we actually fight?"

"Guess so. This should be interesting."

"We will have a fight for entertainment," Yuki said. The Dj began to play some music and people cheered. Yuki got off the stage. For some reason, the stage had become decorated with scenery that resembled a six year-old's fairy tale book. No one seemed to notice though. They were excited about the next event. Haruhi entered stage left, and began to explain what would happen. "Hello everyone. As you know today is my birthday. I have some friends who are fighting over my affection and so, right now, they will battle for my love in front of a live audience! Who will win—Sir Itsuki Koizumi the Great, or Kyon? As they say on Adventure Quest, Battle On!"

"I guess we're up," Itsuki said as he stepped onto the stage.

I'm I really going to do this…? Kyon thought to himself. He got on stage too. Amazingly, the stage felt like the sea on a warm day. Kyon looked around and realized that he wasn't in the school anymore. It was as if he had suddenly walked outside, but he was still inside… right?

Kyon looked around and realized that the only people around were him and Itsuki.

"What did she do?" He asked himself out loud.

"Kyon," Itsuki called, "it seems as if Haruhi has let her imagination run a little wild. I think we are knights now…"

"Meaning?"

"We're in an alternate reality that she just created right now."

"This is all happening way to fast. Nothing is making sense anymore." Kyon sat down on the grass. "I give up. I can't take this anymore."

"Sadly you don't have a choice Kyon," Itsuki said. "Knowing Haruhi, she won't let us go until we've done what she wants. Get up and fight."

Itsuki ran towards Kyon, fast. Kyon dodged and did a back flip. "Since when could I—" He yelled.

"It's not you, it's Miss Suzumiya!" Itsuki answered. He jumped at Kyon and Kyon cartwheeled out of the way. Itsuki charged at him and Kyon blocked. They realized that the swords were actually real.

"This is so dangerous," Kyon yelled as he slashed. Itsuki ducked and side swept Kyon. Kyon fell, but used his sword to block Itsuki's blow. Kyon then rolled out of the way and got up. He charged at Itsuki again, this time faking a left but going for the right. Itsuki reversed Kyon and was able to dodge.

Kyon, jumped and kicked Itsuki in the face. Itsuki rolled, but was able to flip over and stop himself. Kyon charged again, but Itsuki punched Kyon. For some reason, the punch sent Kyon flying like a ragdoll. He smacked his back against a palm tree. He spat out blood and then fell on his knees and gasped for air.

"What is this! Shonen Manga? Why did I just spit out blood?" He screamed.

"Does it hurt?" Itsuki asked.

"Not really… I just can't believe that I spat out blood."

"Oh. Okay." Itsuki punched Kyon in the stomach, hard. He spat out blood in slow motion. Itsuki backed up and stared at Kyon, who was still gasping. "Sorry Kyon," he said. "I just have to end this." He raised his sword and slashed. Kyon flinched and awaited the blow, but it didn't come. He looked up and he was lying down on the stage. Everyone was cheering Itsuki. Both Yuki and Haruhi were raising one of his hands. Kyon sat up. He looked around, confused. He looked up and caught Haruhi's gaze. For a while, they stared at each other. Then Kyon looked down. Haruhi sighed and turned around again.