laal ratty - Don't you just hate those writer jerks who leave us on cliffhangers? ...wait a second...
NoSpillBlood - LOL, I thought I'd get one person reviewing something about the Eddie/Crane slash implication. *takes off fishing hat*
NURSE J0Y - You have no idea how hard I'm looking forward to those Eddie/Lina stories of yours...seriously, hearing that you have two on the go makes me super happy. ^_^
Robot521 - I don't think the Scarecrow gets enough credit for how good he can handle himself in a fight. I mean, the guy is a sort of bookish fellow who can hold his own pretty good.
Pinkqueen - YESSSSSSS! - Spy
jacksparrowlovesme - Poor Eddie. I have been a little mean to him, haven't I? *makes mental note to not kill Eddie so much*
rockpunk92 - Wait? So by your logic if I was a guy I'd be a douche, but if I were a girl I'd only be a chick...seems a little unfair...I'd say I'm a dillhole, but only because it makes me titter like a schoolgirl to say it. ^_^ ...or schoolboy... *mysterious face*
Violeta27 - Yeah. You know how many lives Batman would have saved if he just killed the Joker to begin with? I mean, there has to be a point where Batman can just go, 'you know what? I think it's time to put the mad dog down'.
KaylaRocks - So about that homework you didn't do? ...dammit, you said NOT to ask! *sheepish* Thanks for the review!
Renny777 - So, Renny777, we meet again...*Bond villain face*
bleedy - Wow, I hope it was just my chapter and not too much caffeine that made your heart go into overdrive.
TanithSeh1011 - You know people have been making a lot of comments about the speed at which I write...perhaps I really outta slow it down...put out a chapter a year or something...*begins to think 'writing too fast' is code* Code for what? I don't know...drugs maybe...or rock and roll...whatever these kids are into nowadays...
Pharaoh-chan - Noticed the patchwork of arcs and storylines, eh? Yeah, it's hard to not do that when you read so many comics and enjoy bits and pieces here and there...eventually if you want to write Batman fanfiction you need to mix and match. Still though, how many damned origin stories do they need for Catwoman before someone says 'alright, enough! I can't follow them all'.
For those of you who doubt my story and the direction it's taking, just remember that it's listed as humour/romance. 'nuff said.
Chapter Fifteen: Girders & Helicopters
Day Nineteen: Part Five
**Selina**
She had stopped off at home to change into her catsuit, before heading for the old toy factory where the Joker had taken up residence.
Mad as hell, she took along her studded cat o' nine tails, prepared to lay down a hell of a good ass whooping on first the Joker, then Eddie.
Moving across the city by rooftop she dropped to the pavement of the street when the buildings ended for the sparse concrete of the industrial area. Now in the shadows, she headed for the old factory district, keeping out of sight of the bums and whores who lingered in the night. Eventually she arrived at the chain-link fence that surrounded the factory and climbed it easily, dropping onto the other side in time to duck behind some crates as Batman's helicopter set down on the factory roof. The bright blue searchlight, wavering across the factory's property before the man emerged.
Selina watched as Batman disappeared from sight on the rooftop, before climbing onto a nearby building to follow his path.
Up on top of what looked like some electrical out building, she nearly tripped over a dejected looking clown, who clutched her hammer to her chest tightly.
"Harley," Selina whispered.
The blonde sniffed. "Hiya, Lina."
"What's going on?" She asked.
"Everyone's ganging up on my puddin'."
Easing onto the edge of the roof beside Harley Quinn, Selina watched the factory quietly.
"Why aren't you in there then?"
Harley swung her legs a little. "I can't decide."
"Decide what?"
"Whether maybe he should die or not. Savin' him, he'll be awfully mad that I was gone all night and it'd mean I'd have to go in there and fight Mistah E and Professa Crane and Red. But if I let them kill him, then I'll never be able to snuggle my puddin'. Red kidnapped me so I wouldn't be here, but…I don't know. My mind says let the Joker die, but my heart screams save him." She pouted a little. "Love stinks."
"It really doesn't, Harley. I mean, sure sometimes it lets you down, but love shouldn't 'stink'."
Harley rolled her eyes. "Well, sure, says the girl who got Mistah E. He's the best!"
Selina clenched her hands around her whip. "He kidnapped me tonight."
"Why?"
"To keep me from doing something." She replied.
Harley fluttered her feet out from the building. "Comin' here to kill the Joker?"
"I was just going to watch his back."
"And yer mad at him?"
"I don't like being controlled." She snarled.
Harley laughed. "Yer dumber than ya look, Lina!"
She scowled at the laughing blonde, it only made Harley laughed harder.
"I mean, he kidnaps ya because he cares enough about ya, to keep ya out of trouble and ya seem sour about it?" Harley went on. "I only wish someone cared enough about me to do that!"
"I don't think he went about it in the right way."
"By what? Askin' ya? Lina, even I know how stubborn ya can be! Ya can't say no to a cat, ya can only lock 'em in a room to keep 'em out of trouble." Falling quiet, the clown's made-up face dropped back into a serious, almost sad state. "I mean, ya should go easy on him. He always looked at you differently than everyone else. Like ya were only person worth breathin', ya know? I think he really cares about ya. When ya find a guy like that, ya need to just relax and let things happen…"
Looking over when Harley trailed off, Selina found the young woman frowning at her lap.
"I really hurt him, didn't I?" She whispered.
Watching the blonde as a revelation of sorts passed through her, broke Selina's heart. The young woman was just realizing how badly she ruined all the good she had, how badly her obsession with the Joker ruined it all for her.
"I don't care what happens anymore." Harley stated firmly, pushing to her feet. "I'm going to find a place to stay for the night. To hell with everyone."
Smiling, Selina pushed to her feet as well. "You can spend the night at my place if you want, Harley."
The blonde beamed and threw her arms around Selina. "Yer the best, Cats! But only for tonight, tomorrow I'm on my own!"
Harley Quinn hopped down from the building and walked off into the night, with only a single hesitant pause, before moving on and disappearing in the darkness.
**Crane**
They moved across the factory floor towards the Riddler.
Ivy knelt in the blood at his side and helped him back to sit on his ass, as she ran her hands over his chest looking for the wound.
Kneeling on the other side of his friend, Crane scanned him for the wound as Ivy began to tear off the fake armoured breast plate of the bat suit.
"Crane?" Edward croaked between pained gasps for air.
"What is it, Edward?"
"I need…an adult." He grunted.
The Scarecrow frowned. "What?"
"Tell…Ivy to stop…molesting me."
Ivy had Edward down to a black Kevlar vest, before she pulled back from the Riddler. "What the hell? Where're you shot? Where's the blood coming from?"
"My leg." Edward gasped, reaching up with a shaky hand to pull a flattened slug from where it had embedded itself into the bulletproof vest. Eyeing it, Edward threw the slug off into the distance where it made a silvery ping on the concrete floor. He still panted, but otherwise seemed fine. "Jesus, that hurts like hell. Think it cracked a rib…"
Ivy looked at the Scarecrow, mildly confused.
Coughing, Edward held his chest and struggled to sit up fully. "Did we get him?"
"Yeah." Crane replied.
"Then let's get this done, we're on a tight schedule." Struggling to his feet, the Riddler leaned heavily on a nearby crate.
"What about your leg?" He asked.
Edward waved his arm. "It'll have to wait." He reached out to playfully knock Ivy on the jaw. "Your concern is touching though."
She slapped his hand away. "Don't touch me."
Leaning down, Crane scooped up the armour she had tore off Edward and handed it back to the Riddler, who took it with a small, cat-like grin.
"That leg is bleeding pretty badly," he observed.
Shrugging, Edward slowly replaced the armoured breastplate with trembling hands. "It'll have to wait," he repeated. Motioning to his scythe, Edward said, "may I?"
Not normally one to give up his weapon, Crane hesitated before handing it over.
Edward leaned heavily on it and limped off behind the enraged Poison Ivy.
Catching up with him, Crane had to ask, "when did you start wearing Kevlar?"
"Since I pissed off one too many people." Edward replied casually. "Best investment I've ever made."
"Riddler!"
All three villains turned their eyes up to the ceiling, where a bat was gliding down towards them, cape extended.
Hastily pulling the device off his arm, Edward handed it off to the Scarecrow. "The plan's changed, Jon. Take this, press the blue button while touching Ivy and the Joker, it'll take you back to our meeting point. I'll take care of the bat. You know what to do."
Crane quirked a brow, but took the device.
He and Ivy raced towards the Joker's body, leaving an injured Riddler to handle Batman.
**Edward**
Watching Batman land, he pulled off the cowl and dropped it. It was useless now with the plans being altered.
"You know, half your problems wouldn't even be problems if you just learned to keep your nose in your own business, Batman." Edward said, moving into the bigger man's path.
Batman's fist connected with that cracked rib and it broke, Edward felt and heard the snap as he was flung aside by the man.
"They won't be there!" He called after Batman from where he had landed among some old machinery, holding his broken rib tightly.
As the bat disappeared among the boxes on the trail of Ivy and Crane, Edward struggled back to his feet. If he hobbled away fast enough, he could get away from the bat and meet up with Crane and Ivy back at Crane's lair.
He made it as far as Ivy's abandoned vines, when a hand landed heavily on his shoulder.
Batman whirled the Riddler around to face him.
"Where'd they take the Joker?"
Edward blinked. "I can't remember, I think you scrambled my brains when you flung me into that metal press."
Batman slammed his forehead into Edward's as the stronger man hefted the thin Riddler up by the collar of his bat suit. "Where?"
"Beating an unarmed man is low, Bats." Edward panted.
"Killing a man is even lower." Batman replied coldly.
Edward laughed maniacally. "The Joker? He's hardly a man!"
Outside the wail of police sirens could be heard faintly in the distance.
"You called for back-up?" Edward demanded. "What's wrong? Scared of me?"
"You're going back to Arkham for parole violations, Edward." Batman growled.
Edward laughed again. "No. I'm never going back there. I'll die before I ever step foot in Arkham again."
"You keep treading this path you're on and you just might, Edward."
"Is this really about the Joker? Or is this about losing your little kitty to me, Batman?" Edward asked softly, as he reached for a fake batarang on his utility belt. It didn't work, but it was sharp enough. "Feeling a little put out that she found another man? Feeling like a common man again? Do you want to know why she's with me and not you? Because with you, she'd have to change who she really is. With me, she doesn't have to change a thing." Grasping it, he slashed at the bared part of the bat's face.
Batman threw him down and leapt back.
Taking the opportunity to make his escape, Edward found himself weaving clumsily into the maze of boxes and crates. He ignored the intense pain of his broken rib and his wounded leg, hobbling himself towards the back of the factory. He had to be careful with that rib, it felt like it was in a very, very dangerous place. If it jostled anymore out of place it could very well puncture his lung.
**Selina**
Creeping around on the top of the factory, Selina took a detour to poke her nose into the helicopter's cockpit.
She took in the lights and the switches, before slipping out and returning to her lurking.
Heading across the width of the building, she collided with a form as they popped up out of nowhere.
The Scarecrow peered down at Eddie's device strapped to his own arm, not even noticing her.
"This thing can't be set correctly," he growled at it.
Smirking, she slid an arm around his shoulders. "Neat toy."
Crane jerked in shock, but remained calm otherwise. "Where are we?"
"On top of the toy factory."
"Ah, I had the sea level wrong. It's a good thing I didn't add that extra zero." He muttered. "Where's the Riddler?"
Selina shrugged. "Wouldn't know, I'm not allowed to play with you boys."
With his mask still on the device, Crane snarled. "Well, I'm not going to risk playing around with this thing anymore. It's a wonder I didn't die this trip." He levelled the mask on her. "I don't suppose you have a car handy?"
She beamed impishly at him. "I found a helicopter. It's the bats."
The sound of police sirens lit up the Gotham night and the two of them looked off in the direction of them.
"A helicopter will work." Crane said, moving off towards it. "Think he has the anti-theft alarm set? Last time I tried to steal the Batmobile it blew a nasty flame burp into my face and singed my mask."
"No. I was already inside. Can you fly?"
Climbing into the cockpit, Crane shrugged. "I watched Harley play a flight simulation once…it didn't look that hard. Go get Edward and I'll drop you a rope when you get free of the factory."
Slinking around the helicopter, Selina purred. "Oh, now you boys want me around?"
"I never said you couldn't play." He called after her, flicking the switch to start the blades.
It turned on the windshield wiper blades.
Crane hesitated, before turning them off. "There was a bug. Look, just tell Edward that we have eight minutes until the effects of the tranquilizer wears off and Ivy's faced with a very angry Joker. She has another dose to give him, but even that has a limit."
Selina chuckled. "Right. Just don't kill us when we get out." She moved away from the helicopter and bent to open a nearby hatch as the chopper's blades began.
Looking for danger before hopping down from the open hatch, Selina landed on a steel girder and moved across the beams of the factory rafters, looking for signs of life in the deserted building.
She followed the sounds of crates falling to the floor and shattering, spying a few of the taller stacks toppling messily.
Racing across the beams gracefully, she soon caught sight of Batman moving across the rafters opposite of her, intent on a hunt.
Outside the sounds of police sirens we getting closer, drowned out by the sound of a helicopter.
She'd have to hurry and get Eddie before the cops arrived on scene. If she got to him in time, they could leave without Gotham's finest becoming aware of the Riddler's activities.
Spotting the fleeing Riddler at the same moment as Batman, Selina launched herself over a gap and began moving laterally towards the bat.
It was too late, Batman hurled himself down towards Eddie.
"Eddie!" She called out a warning.
He turned in time to leap out of Batman's way, darting awkwardly to the left and disappearing among more crates. The way he was running, it was unnatural, he favoured his left leg.
Eddie was injured.
Batman paused long enough to look up at her, before he continued the chase.
She too kept on moving with the two men.
The Western wall of the factory was soon coming up and Eddie was running out space to flee, Selina watched as he slammed into a heavy door hard, before trying the knob.
It was too late, Batman was nearing him, bola in hand.
With only a split second to make her decision, she leapt, flying through the air down towards the heavily armoured Batman.
As her body collided with his from the height she was falling, she felt the wind knocked out of her lungs as the two of them hit the concrete floor hard.
Batman grabbed hold of her and yanked her off his body, pushing her roughly to the side. Despite still struggling for air, she rolled onto her feet and knelt there on all fours eyeing him.
By that time Eddie was standing before them, a piece of broken crate in hand, he slammed Batman over the back of the head and while it didn't do anything, it distracted him enough for the Riddler to grab his grappling gun.
Helping Selina up, Eddie pulled her in the direction of the stairs that led up into the supervisor officers floating high over the factory floor.
"Riddler, give yourself up! The judge may go easy on you!" Batman shouted after them.
Eddie laughed over his shoulder at the man who had a batarang aimed at the Riddler. "Why don't you give up, Bat, while I'm still trying to go easy on you!" Shoving the grappling gun into her hands, Eddie glared hard at her. "Take this and get the hell out of here." He snarled.
"Good idea, come on." She took his hand, keeping her other on the gun and aimed it at the rafters overhead.
Taking a shot, she waited for a tense second as the sheep's hook flew towards a girder and wrapped around it.
"Hold on to me." She ordered.
He did so as Batman raced up the stairs towards them.
They only had a mere hair breadth of time to pull it off and she wrapped both hands around the gun and pressed the retract button.
It tore them off the platform with a powerful whirring, drawing them up into the rafters.
Batman was after them, climbing a pipe that ran down the wall from the ceiling.
Helping Eddie onto a beam, she pointed in the direction of a hatch. "Come on, follow me."
He panted. "Kitten, I can't jump like you."
She touched his jaw. "It'll be okay, Ed. Just follow me."
"Selina, if I hit those girders my rib will my lung. Here," he drew the grappling hook gun off the girder and swung it in hand. "If you can get to the hatch, open it and I'll fire the hook."
"We don't have time!" She snarled.
"Exactly, get moving."
Eyeing the bat who was approaching them, moving across the girders, she nodded and leapt towards the hatch.
She had never moved so carelessly or recklessly before, flying over the rafters like a demon.
Reaching up, she forced the hatch open and turned back to see Ed spinning on Batman, firing the grapple into his chest. It knocked the man off his flight path, but didn't knock him down.
She raced back as Ed was caught in Batman's arms, tearing across the precarious girders, leaping across voids that promised a good thirty foot fall. It wouldn't kill her if she fell properly, but if she fell accidentally she wouldn't have time to fall properly.
"Let him go!" She ordered.
Batman held Eddie tight in both hands. Ed was squirming, making both men struggle for balance on the rafters.
"Please?" She asked.
"He's a criminal and will be treated as such."
Scowling, Selina placed her hand on the handle of her whip. "Pull your head out of your ass. Just let him go this one time. For me?"
"There won't be anymore favours between you and I." Batman snarled. "Edward Nygma will be tried for violating parole and attempted murder."
In Batman's grip, Eddie quirked a brow. "Who said it was 'attempted'? As far as you know the Joker's dead."
Batman balled his hand up. "Shut up."
"Or what? We both know you won't kill me. You can beat me if you want, but I've been beaten before, so it's nothing new." Eddie replied.
"Give me the Riddler, Batman." Selina said. "And we'll both leave Gotham for good."
Batman glared at her. "No deal." He leapt back off the girder with Eddie in hand, what no one was counting on was for Eddie to reached out and grab the girder. It shocked Batman into releasing him, as the man opened his cape and fell slowly down to the factory floor.
Selina watched as Eddie's hands slipped across the dusty girder's surface and he too fell.
Time slowed, then stopped completely.
Batman landed gracefully on the factory floor, Eddie didn't.
She didn't care one bit about her safety, as she leapt from the ceiling, falling the thirty feet to tumble and roll gracefully. Her ankle complained, but it didn't break as she landed properly.
Moving towards the Riddler's body, she pulled him into her lap.
"Eddie?"
He looked so young, so pale and so young.
Thankfully he still had a pulse, but he was out cold it seemed.
Glaring at the approaching man in the bat suit, Selina spat, "you son of a bitch!"
With soft blue-grey eyes, Bruce hung his head a little. "They can fix him up at Arkham."
Carefully easing Eddie back onto the floor, she stood, letting the studded flails of her whip drop heavily to the floor.
"He's not going back."
"Selina."
She leapt at him, all claws and whip, landing a boot against his chest and knocking him back.
Outside the police sirens were right outside the gate.
She didn't care.
As her and Batman fought, she managed to knock him down enough to land on his chest, claws around his neck.
She hadn't even realized she was crying until he reached up and gently wiped the tears away from her mask.
Her grip went limp.
"Please?" She whispered, leaning down and resting her forehead against his. "Give him to me?"
"Selina," he whispered softly. "I can't."
"Please?" She had never begged, but this wasn't an everyday thing. It was a time for begging.
His eyes glassed over. "Go."
She pulled away from him, studying his eyes for any hint of betrayal.
"Take him and go." Batman whispered. "Keep him out of trouble."
Selina sniffled, trying to regain her dignity. "Thank you."
"Yeah." He growled.
Moving across the floor towards Eddie's body, she knelt at his side and lightly slapped him on the cheek.
"Eddie?"
He was unresponsive.
"Wake up, Eddie. Come on!"