Hi, guys, you gave me five reviews, so here's a treat! Reviews get me to post quicker! So, remember those bumps I talked about? Well, here comes a big one! The first part of this chapter is something that I've added after the story was done because I wanted to address something that a reviewer had asked. ENJOY!
"Hey Bella," Esme called from her dark room as I entered Cullen Photography for my after school job.
I said hi as I walked around the shop, as always, I admired the photographs that lined the wall, even the ones that she'd done for me with Charlie and Jane, Jane and I and even some candid one's of Jane. My eyes shifted on the wall that held her degrees, yes, more than one and she had more than one masters as well.
"Bella," Esme said as she came out of the dark room, a proof in her hand. "We're having a New Years Eve party, I'm sure Edward has already invited you, but I wanted to let you know that Charlie and Jane can come as well."
"Okay," I nodded. "Esme, your a wonderful photographer, why do you have your masters in child psychology?"
"To help you," Esme said, a grin on her face. "Seriously, though, my parents were paying for my education and they hated my passion for photography, so in order for them to pay, I had to major and get my masters in something worth wild. I worked with the state for awhile, I hated it, seeing those children in the system, so I took the money and went back t school and received my masters in fine arts with an emphasis in photography."
"So, that's how you got here?" I asked, in sudden awe over the women that was more of a mother than my real mother was. "You did what your parents wanted just so you could do what you wanted?"
"My mother and I were always close, so I didn't think twice when they said that I had to major in psychology and I had always enjoyed children, so I went that route. The choices I've made, Bella, have helped me get to where I am. That second time through college, I meet Carlisle and I've had my kids, had I stuck with my original career, who knows were I'd be. Would I change any of it? No, because all those bumps have gotten me right where I want to be."
I smiled as I headed towards the dark room to do some cleaning, the words that Esme had just spoke ran through my head, was she right? Was all those little bumps worth all this pain and tears, was everything I was going through worth all the heartache at the moment? Was all this worth it?
"3... 2... 1... Happy New Year," the party at the Cullen's house cried, Jane was running around excitedly, Emmett had given her sugar so close to bed that she was up now for another few hours. Michael had crashed a few hours back along with most of the other kids, Jane, well; Emmett was going to die in the foreseeable future if he didn't get her to bed.
"Happy New Year," a velvet voice whispered in my ear, I turned to find Edward and gave him a lingering kiss; he even dipped me with this kiss.
"Gross, momma," Jane whined as Edward pulled me out of the dip and I had to pick Jane up.
"Are you ready for bed yet?"
"No," she said, yawning. I smiled; all that sugar was wearing off. I carried her to her room and laid her down, noticing that it was about time for a big girl bed. I saw that she was already fast asleep, a smile planted on her face in her sleep. I brushed the dark blond hair that she'd gotten from her father out of her face before going back down to the party.
"So, I'm going to have to get Jane a big girl's bed, she's barely fitting in the crib," I told Edward once I found him.
"Let's not worry about that tonight, I have something I want to show you," he said and lead me to the coat rack and we put on our winter coats. Then he led me to his truck where we got in the bed and set down. Edward put an arm around me and I snuggled into the warmth that was my best friend and boyfriend. "Look up," he whispered and I noticed for the first time how bright the stars where, we set there for an hour just watching the stars, trying to figure out which constellation was which.
As we watched, Edward nuzzled my neck, kissing it, licking it and sucking at it, and I attached my lips to his after a few short moments of him teasing me, his hands ghosting up and down my waist, finally coming up under my coat and shirt, skimming my skin that was under the layers clothes.
I froze.
"Edward, please," I pleaded, being transported back to that time when Phil violated me, even though I knew that Edward was different, I just couldn't shake that feeling.
Edward's hands left my skin and I felt a twinge of sadness that they were gone. My panic was also residing.
"I'm sorry," Edward whispered his arms still wrapped tightly around me.
"I can't do this, Edward, you need a girl who loves the feel of your hands on her body, with me, it just scares me." I untangled myself from his arms and went back into the house, not looking back.
"Okay," Alice came up to me in the halls the day before Valentine's Day. "What did my boneheaded brother do this time?"
Everybody had noticed that something was wrong between Edward and I, we hadn't went out in a long time, I could hardly be in the same room as him, I'd went so far as to having my father drop me off at school again.
"He didn't do anything, I ended it this time," I said, not looking at Alice, I knew that if she saw my eyes, she'd know that I was really tore up over how I'd left Edward. I grabbed the books I needed for class, shoved them in my book bag and shut my locker.
"When are you two going to realize that you love each other?"
"Alice," I said turning to her, I was furious that she was trying to meddle and I was in a crappy mood and it was getting worse by the second. "Look, I don't love Edward, I can't love him. Edward and I are done; I got too wrapped up in him and forgot about the single most important person in my life, my daughter."
I stalked off after that, thankfully Alice didn't run after me. My feet where leading me, I wasn't really paying any attention to where I was going, but I ended up at the door and for the first time in my life I realized that I didn't want to play by the rules. I walked out the door into the sunshine and took off running.
I ran until I couldn't run any farther, then I realized what I'd done. I looked at my watch, it was just one in the afternoon, and I'd just skipped out on my afternoon classes. I keep walking, not really thinking about where I was going, my father would roll up as soon as they realized that I was missing.
I heard the growl of an engine but didn't turn around. The sound got closer and then stopped just behind me, I gulped, realizing what stupid thing I'd done. I keep walking.
"Wait, I know you," the voice sounded familiar. "Bella Swan, right?"
I turned around and found...
"Jacob Black, what the hell you doing here?" I asked. Jacob had been a friend of mine when I'd come to Forks for summers before Jane had been born. Last I'd heard he was living with his sister in Hawaii, something about him ditching school and being a rebel. He was a year older than me, the same age as Edward.
I walked over to my friend and gave him a hug.
"Moved back, my sister got married and shipped me back here. What are you doing here?"
"I've live with my father and daughter."
"I heard from dad you had a little girl, Charlie gave him a picture and he emailed it to Rebecca and me. The real question, though, is what the hell you are doing half way to the res, alone, on a school day, which is still in session last time I checked."
"Why aren't you in class?"
"Ditched- okay, you got me, it's an early out, stop dancing around the question and I'll give you a ride."
"Early out as well, some national holiday."
"Bull-shit," Jacob said. "Res is only out because of a water main burst."
"Fine," I said, gritting my teeth, "I walked out, I broke up with my boyfriend over winter holidays and his sister was grilling me on why."
"Oh, so good little Bella Swan ditched. What is the world coming to?"
"Shut up, Jake," I punched his arm, but hurt my hand in the process; he'd gained a lot of muscle since the last time I'd seen him.
"It's great to see you, you want to come over and hang?"
"I really need to call Charlie," I worried.
"The whole point of ditching is not to let a parent know. How are you getting home later?"
"I was going to ride the bus-"
"Yea, I'd totally ditch over riding the bus. Come on, we can sit in the garage where Billy can't see the fugitive. I've got some work to do yet on my bike, maybe I'll give you some lessons on how to ride."
Jacob got back on his bike and handed me a spare helmet, which I accepted and we took off towards his home.