Chapter 7:Only Ourselves To Blame
Tulio and a few of his co-workers were busy scurrying around the sanctuary, tending to the smattering of wounded birds while the waterlogged gale whipped about just outside the ivory walls.
It was if the storm's frenzy put them on edge, quickening their gaits and increasing the speed of their speech.
Fernando and Vanessa were holed up in their room, watching TV and paying as little attention to the tempest as possible.
Linda was engrossed in cleaning the sanctuary's living quarters, her thoughts constantly being pulled back to Blu and his family.
She knew Blu inside and out, and if Tulio had taught her anything, it was that animal instincts are much more prominent and attuned to nature's mood. She knew he would have guided his mate to their home before the gale even began, and their children would have stationed themselves in their own hollows as well.
Despite these reassurances, however, they were still in danger, be it from the furious wind and rain or the frequent staffs of lightning that split the sky. Their home could be blown over, or worse, be the unlucky victim of a heavenly bolt strike.
She was desperate to go out and corral them, to shelter them under the protection the sanctuary offered, but Tulio had warned her strongly not to do so.
The shrieking wind and driving rain brought back memories of the blizzards in Moose Lake, which would leave her and Blu trapped in the bookstore for days on end. She prayed that this tempest would be comparatively brief, and as soon as the sun emerged, she would head out to check on Blu, Jewel, and their children, if she could find them.
It was already the late evening hours, yet the sky remained an odd color of gray against which the lightning flashed very prominently. While she was in the middle of scrubbing the kitchen floor, a string of heavy knocks drummed on her eardrums.
Who would be out in this? More importantly, why would they come here?
She abandoned her mop and jogged out of the kitchen, ambling across the carpeted living room towards the solid oak front door.
The wind and rain are going to blow right in as soon as I open the door! Well, here goes nothing...
She gripped the knob and rotated it briskly, stepping back as the door swung open. Just as predicted, a bubble of raging wind flowed in, whipping Linda's hair around and sending water all over the floor.
Before she could peek around the door, two slightly drenched humans marched in and gave Linda pleading looks.
Ignoring their unannounced intrusion, she flung the door closed and looked them over. They were plainly Brazilian, and she guessed that they were a couple.
The strangely shirtless man held a white cloth in his hands, lumpy in several places and dappled with stains of scarlet. Immediately, her mind grew panicked, a fearful expression forming on her face as well.
The man raised his eyebrows and proceeded to speak in clear – albeit heavily accented – Portuguese: "Sorry for getting your floor wet, but it's nasty out there."
"It's alright, sir," Linda replied shakily.
The male cleared his throat and asked, "Do you know a man named Dr. Monteiro?"
Her voice taut with fear, she replied, "He's my husband, and he's quite busy right now. What do you have in your hands, sir? I'm Linda, by the way."
"I am Reynaldo, and this is my wife Griselda. We can't stay here long, because our children are out in the truck. While we were driving home, we had an... accident."
His wife cut in and stated mournfully, "A bird hit our windshield, and we had to come all the way here with it stuck there. What you are about to see... is very heartbreaking."
She turned her body and nudged Reynaldo's arm. He gave her a compliant nod and grasped the edge of the material. With one smooth motion, he withdrew the sheet, revealing the lumpy shape once concealed underneath.
A strikingly blue bird, covered in lacerations and dried blood, rested limp in his grasp. One severed wing lay on its chest, while the other was badly mangled. To top off the goriness, the bird's head dangled at a grotesque angle, while a sliver of white jutted up from its neck.
Linda knew that it wasn't her dear Blu, but the familiarity of its head feathers screamed the answer to her: it was Cobalt, Blu's son.
Linda felt herself grow woozy, and Griselda had to dash over and support her before she collapsed to the floor.
"Linda, are you alright? Do you know this bird?"
Griselda asked forcefully. Linda steadied herself as the tears began to well in her eyes.
"My pet macaw... lives out behind this building, in the jungle, with his mate. This... is his son..."
Griselda's and Reynaldo's eyes went as wide as an owl's, their gazes flickering between the tearful Linda and the battered bird.
Remorsefully, Reynaldo replaced the t-shirt and said, "We are so sorry, Linda. He must have got caught out in the storm. We were driving next to the bay... and he fell out the sky... right into our windshield. It happened so fast... there was nothing we could do."
Linda clasped her hands over her eyes and moaned, "He's gone... forever. How am I going to tell this... to Blu... to Jewel? I can't believe... Cobalt's dead..."
Griselda soothingly ran her hands over Linda's arms and asked pitifully, "Do you want me to get your husband? Where is he?"
Linda weakly raised her right arm and pointed to the hall across from them.
"He's... in one of the labs..."
Ruefully, Griselda broke away from the sobbing female and trudged towards the hall.
Crushing silence punctuated by Linda's sniffling was all that remained following her departure, as Reynaldo dared not speak a word. He kept his eyes locked on his bloodied t-shirt, barely acknowledging the return of his wife, who was being trailed by a somewhat lanky man.
In a flash, he ran over to Linda and embraced her with his arms.
"Linda, Linda, what's wrong?"
Uncovering her tear-stained face, she whispered, "Reynaldo, show him... what you brought."
Wordlessly, the male retracted the sheet once again, inciting a sharp gasp from Tulio.
"Meu Deus! Is that... Blu's son? Oh no..."
Griselda faced Tulio and explained the situation: "He crashed into our truck's windshield about thirty minutes ago. He must have... died on impact. He used to be such a beautiful bird, and now... he's gone..."
Tulio cringed, and despite being wracked with sadness, motioned for Reynaldo to hand Cobalt's grisly body over. Reynaldo slid his shirt under the macaw and stretched his arms out. His hands trembling, Tulio grabbed the cloth and brought Cobalt slightly closer for inspection.
He was as chilled as the air outside, utterly silent and motionless.
As the trembling crawled from his hands to his arms, and then his entire body, he was forced to hide the macaw's tortured body away from his eyes.
He faced the distraught couple and said, "Thank you... for bringing him here. At least his death... was quick and painless. You don't have to stay... any longer..."
"What is going to happen to him?" asked Reynaldo in a clipped tone.
"We'll have to... bring his parents... and his sisters here, and show them the truth. After that... I just don't know..."
The delivery couple shuffled towards the door, and Griselda paused before opening it.
"Tulio, Linda, we sent up prayers for him, so that he may rest in peace. I can't help but think that this our fault. We never should have traveled along the bay..."
Shaking his head, Tulio countered, "No, it's not your fault. Though I don't know why he was flying in the storm, Fate sometimes takes away the ones we love most. Everything happens for a reason... and this is one of those times. Goodbye, you two, and I hope you make it home safely."
"I guess that's true. It will be hard to forget him, but at least he is in a better place. Goodbye, Tulio. Goodbye, Linda. Our hearts go out to you and his family..."
The humans exited the building languidly, marching through the wind and climbing into their truck. Tulio and Linda did not hear them drive off, but they knew the couple had already fled.
The wind seemed to howl even faster as Tulio led Linda over to the couch. As she sank down into the leather like a limp puppet, he took a spot next to her and placed a heavy hand on her shoulder.
"Oh Tulio, this day... is a nightmare. Poor Cobalt... what did he do to deserve this?"
"I can't answer that question, dear. I may be a gifted ornithologist, but even I can't bring back the dead..."
She turned her puffy eyes on him and said, "Blu, Jewel, and his sisters have to know. As soon as... this storm lets up... we'll have to bring them here..."
"And that is what we will do, dear. His loss will affect them deeper than it has affected us... and we have to do our best to comfort them."
Linda gave a pathetic nod and leaned into Tulio's shoulder. While he massaged her back, he felt a piece of his soul shrivel up, a delayed reaction to Cobalt's macabre demise.
Linda, too, felt a small void open up in her, and she gave a small shiver.
Both of them knew that his untimely end would send a ripple of untold despair through Blu and Jewel's family bonds. Linda and Tulio would have to endure a second wave of sadness when Cobalt's family saw his wrecked body.
The humans felt jelly-like inside, but that would be nothing compared to how the macaws would feel. Though the meeting was inevitable, Tulio and Linda were unsure that they could bear seeing their feathered counterparts internally shredded.
They had bore witness to a mortifying example of life's brevity, and there was nothing they could do to reverse it.
"Oh Blu, what if Cobalt's out there, all alone, in that terrible thunderstorm?"
Blu, who was tucked in the nest next to Jewel, put his wing around her.
"I'm sure he took cover long before now. I mean, we drove him off... way before it even got here. Ouch... it still hurts to breathe..."
A depressed Jewel shot her gaze to her mate's chest, its once-perfect surface marred by three jagged cuts.
The wounds that the enraged Cobalt had inflicted no longer bled, but their healing was prolonged due to their location. Every time Blu inhaled, the cuts pulled apart like yawning scarlet smiles, sending spurts of nauseating pain throughout his chest.
"I swear, Cobalt had no right to do that to you. If he ever decides to come back, I'll give him hell for attacking his own father..."
Her tone was a mix of shocked anger and crushing regret.
Blu gazed at her with a sullen expression and replied, "Maybe... I deserved it, after how I ruined his life. These lacerations are bestowing upon me a glimpse of the infinite agony you and I put him through. Ow..."
His statement was a deep and concise answer, and Jewel could not counter it.
"Do you think we should ask Scarlet and Nico if they've seen him after the weather quiets down?"
"Yes, but you'll have to go... by yourself. I can't imagine trying to fly... in my condition. Ohhh, where's Tulio when you need him?"
Every time Blu moaned in pain, it sent another frozen spear through Jewel's soul.
Ever since the injury had left him incapacitated, he was determined to suffer through the crushing ache until the storm cleared, at which point he would have Jewel carry him to the aid of Tulio.
They had fallen asleep shortly after their disastrous confession and wasted the day away, only to be woken up by the approaching watery gale.
That was over two hours ago, and even now, Blu was still stuck in a waking nightmare of bodily torment.
Jewel felt as though his pain was being transferred to her body through some ghostly connection, and she could take no more.
A simplistic idea crept into her head as she glanced from him to the exit and back again.
"Blu, I think there's a way to reduce the pain in your chest and make you feel more comfortable."
He gave her a puzzled look and replied, "How, Jewel? Please... tell me."
"I'll fly outside for a few seconds and pluck a leaf from the top of this tree. It should be clean and cool, and I'll stick it to your chest. It won't hurt to give it a try."
Blu contemplated her novel thought, inhaling and letting out a muffled groan.
"Okay, Jewel, go for it. But please be careful..."
She would only be out of the hollow for a few seconds, but she repressed the urge to roll her eyes.
She gently pulled away from him and hopped towards the exit, pausing to collect herself before entering the wild weather. She flashed him a stern glance and jumped from the hollow, a flash of lightning enunciating her departure.
With each second that ticked by, Blu became more and more panicked, but his fears were soon dispelled when his mate burst back into the hollow. Her feathers sagged under the weight of the water, but a triumphant gleam twinkled in her eyes.
She shook herself briskly before hauling the dripping leaf over to him. She eased him onto his back with her wings before resting the damp green leaf on his chest.
He closed his eyes and let out a sigh of pleasure, and Jewel couldn't help but don a proud, relieved smile
. He fixed his warm hazel eyes on her and muttered, "Thank you, honey. That felt... wonderful..."
"Anytime, handsome. So, what's the plan for dealing with you and Cobalt?"
Jewel hopped into the nest beside him as he whispered, "As soon as this monster typhoon tires out, drop me off at the sanctuary, and then go ask around for information on Cobalt. You can come pick me up when you're done."
"Alright then. Care if I snuggle with you?"
"Go right ahead, my love."
Jewel tilted over and rested on her right wing, blanketing Blu with her left. A dark cloud filled her eyes as she peered into his.
"Blu, do you think our daughters will ever forgive us? Do you think Cobalt will too?"
Blu's rich smile twisted into a frown full of betrayal and loss.
"I... don't know, Jewel. We... completely wasted their lives... for our own selfish ends. Only time can heal our internal wounds, and only time will tell if they come to accept us again. Sapphire and Azura might, but Cobalt..."
He need not conclude his sentence for Jewel to realize its hidden premonition.
As a rumble of thunder rattled their bones, Jewel said, "We'll have to do our best to move on and redeem ourselves, whether our children come to appreciate us again or not. I don't mean to sound hateful, but we may have to mend our lives on our own..."
Blu shifted his position and replied, "You may be right, Jewel. But know this: the future is a mystery to us, until it becomes the present. I am going to try and fall asleep, but you don't have to. If the weather reverts to normal, you have my permission to wake me up."
Jewel gave him a half-hearted peck on the beak.
"Okay, handsome. Chase away all your worries and rest easy."
"With you by my side, that shouldn't be too difficult. Despite all the trauma we've been through, I still love you."
"And I love you too," she responded with melancholy.
Jewel dejectedly played with his head feathers while he stared at her, his eyelids drooping with each repetition. He let out a truncated yawn and fully closed them in the wake of Jewel's thirtieth repetition.
His warmth suffused into her via her wing while he dozed underneath it, just as mesmerized by the feeling as she.
It was moments like these that convinced Jewel that everything was perfect, that their lives were joyous and free of strife.
But she was only fooling herself; the mental scars inflicted upon her from that morning's verbal violence were still fresh in her mind.
She knew without a doubt that Blu was injured just the same, though his physical wounds claimed his attention for the time being.
But when they healed, all focus would shift to the lashes upon his psyche, given to him by their daughters' rejection and Cobalt's complete willingness to forget about his former parents.
Jewel only wanted to see them one last time, to beg and plead for their forgiveness. She couldn't let her children slip away, but she was unsure if they felt the same for their parents.
With each passing day, the chance that she and Blu could pick up the pieces dwindled. The pain of seeing her children distance themselves, however, increased with time.
She had to act soon, when the opportunity of salvaging their bonds was maximized and the regret minimized.
It seemed that nature was conspiring against her, barring her efforts with a spell of heavenly wrath. She knew that the storm couldn't last forever, but not how long it actually would last.
As a close-sounding crack of thunder shook the tree, she snuggled incrementally closer to her mate, doing her best not to disturb his sleep.
No matter how adoring and tranquil she and Blu looked, their lives were in shambles.
The sadistic repercussions of the day's events drew power from the gale and upped their torment, forcing her to hold them at bay so that sleep could take over. She waged the mental war for nearly ten minutes before drowsiness claimed her, casting her into a realm where upbeat dreams thrived.
She drew much relief from the fact that she had been spared a nightmare, but she knew it was not to last. Eventually, her dream would end, and reality would be back to haunt her.
A controlled nudge from Blu jarred her out of her reverie, and as she registered the chill in the air, she was perplexed as to why he had done so. She groaned and blinked, spying Blu in a standing position and inspecting his chest.
"Ugh... Blu... are you sure the storm is over?" she said with noticeable displeasure.
"Yes, Jewel. It's already the next morning. I can feel it. The clouds are still smothering the sky, though. As soon as you're ready, we can get the ball rolling."
Blu rotated around and helped her to her feet, wincing as he did so. Jewel noticed the cuts had turned a reddish-brown hue, interpreting the color change as a good sign.
"How are they feeling, Blu?"
"Better than they were yesterday. I just hope they haven't gotten in infected. They've partly scabbed over, and that is one way that bacteria can get sealed in. The faster I have Tulio properly treat them, the less chance there'll be of me getting sick."
"I see. Well, I am kind of hungry, but I don't feel like eating right now. My mission is too important. And besides, Linda should have something for us to eat at the sanctuary."
"Good points, Jewel. Should we head out now?"
"I don't see why not."
Blu gave a healthy nod and walked over to the exit, motivating Jewel to do the same. She came up beside him and observed the gloomy sky, free of offensive features, but still rather threatening and downcast.
"Do you trust me enough to carry you? What if I drop you?"
He stroked her neck reassuringly and countered, "It's not that hard, Jewel. You'll do fine. If I carried you from the bay to the airport seconds after learning how to fly, you'll have absolutely no problem carrying me to Linda."
"Yeah, I guess you're right. Here we go..."
She hovered over him, fastening the edges of his wings in her grip and lifting him out of the hollow. He gave a sharp groan as she beat her wings, but he quickly grew accustomed to the flight.
"Man, this isn't as easy at it looks. Am I hurting you at all?"
"Not at all. It just feels odd, being as my wings aren't broken."
"There's a first time for everything isn't there?"
"Indeed, my love."
The rest of their flight was engulfed in reflective silence, keeping their minds occupied until they rendezvoused with their destination.
Jewel eased Blu past one of the open upper windows and escorted him down to the living room floor. Jewel's chest was huffing up and down rapidly, coupled with a look of exertion on her face.
Blu cautiously fanned her with his wings and said, "Take some time to recover your energy. I hope this helps."
"Trust me, Blu, it's helping. I hope I never... have to do that again. No offense to you..."
"I understand, Jewel. Don't worry about it."
Blu ceased his fanning one minute after he began, as his chest was gripped by a perpetual ache. It took Jewel three more minutes to cool off and for her metabolism to slow.
Once she felt replenished and calm, she asked, "What if Tulio and Linda are still in bed?"
"Then we'll have to wake them, as unfair as that sounds."
Another more obvious thought sprung into her head, one that left her in a tense state.
"Wait, what if they went out to check on us? What if they're not even here?"
After a slight pause, Blu replied, "Then we're in for a long, boring wait. Come on, let's go check their bedroom..."
Blu and Jewel waddled their way across the house and located the main hall. The door to Fernando's and Vanessa's bedroom was wide open, an observation that planted seeds of worry in the two macaws.
Sure enough, their concerns were justified when they came to the end of the hall. In a small recess to the left lay the unblocked entrance to Linda's bedroom.
They crept solemnly into the space, noting the misshapen comforter and the bare spot on the nightstand, usually occupied by Linda's glasses.
"Darn it, they've already gone! At least it demonstrates the depth of concern they hold for us."
"Yeah, that's true. I guess we should head back into the living room and wait for them to return."
"Hopefully they won't be gone too long. I am tired of dealing with these madly irritating cuts..."
Once the macaws fled the hall, they lofted themselves onto the couch and settled down for a nap.
Before their senses were even deactivated, a flurry of noise kick-started their systems.
No sooner had they opened their eyes did the see Tulio and Linda frozen a few feet away, ghostly expressions on their faces. Their focus was diverted from the humans' horrid facades to the shrouded lump in Tulio's hands.
"Blu?" Jewel asked tentatively. "What's he carrying?"
"I think we're about to find out," Blu replied flatly.
Tulio sucked in a massive breath and said mournfully, "Blu, Jewel, I have something very, very saddening to show you..."
He blinked a few times and removed the thin white sheet, looking away as he did so.
As Blu and Jewel looked upon the motionless – but remarkably clean – bird, their words erupted from their beaks in gags.
"Jewel... that's Cobalt, and he's... he's..."
Blu gripped his chest as floods of dizzying pain swamped it, and he collapsed in a dead faint.
"Cobalt... no... please no..."
Jewel futilely resisted the sapping of her consciousness, and so she ended up next to Blu, sprawled out and silent.
They refused to believe what they had saw, that it was all a hallucination, but that was impossible. If it was merely a conjuration of their depressed minds, why did the sight knock them out?
Instinct screamed at them that their son was dead, and that it was as real as real could be.
Later that very same day, after the rest of Blu and Jewel's family and friends had been rounded up, an avian funeral was held for Cobalt.
Before he was to be interred in the pristine lawn behind the sanctuary, he was laid on the burial site so that the flock of birds could pay their respects.
Rafael and Eva's family, Nico and Pedro, and Scarlet and Ashley's family accompanied Blu and Jewel's surviving offspring in the procession.
Each party marched up to Cobalt's frozen body, said a few prayers, and placed beside him a freshly picked random flower.
Blu and Jewel were the last to go, and their remembrance speech was filled with copious tears.
After all the birds had gone, Tulio, Linda Fernando, and Vanessa took their turn, weeping softly as they spoke.
When they had finished and left their offerings, Tulio retrieved a shovel and laboriously hand-dug the pit that was to be Cobalt's tomb.
The flock of birds looked on in tragic silence, and one of the parties kept their distance, namely Sapphire and Azura. They had barely even acknowledged their parents, blaming them solely for the death of their brother.
Once the pit descended to a depth of three feet, Cobalt was lowered into the hole and covered with his flowers.
Once Tulio filled in the hole, he and his family crept inside, for the chilly air was starting to cool their systems.
Blu and Jewel watched with teary eyes as their daughters flew off slowly after throwing a pitiful, hateful glance their way.
The rest of the birds had not interacted with Cobalt much and did not know him well, but they remained with Blu and Jewel to comfort them. But no matter how many soothing words and placating embraces were shared with the Spix's Macaws, their moods could not be improved.
Blu and Jewel cradled each other as their friends did their best to heal the raw internal damage, but to no avail.
One by one, the individual groups departed, with Scarlet's family the last to fly off.
When Blu looked into Jewel's puffy eyes, she did the same, and a scorching thought ran through both of their brains: "We have only ourselves to blame."
The truth of that unspoken decree injected them with such guilt and remorse that even breathing was difficult.
If only they could rewind the wheels of time seven years and erase the incestuous mission they had laid out for their children. If only they had used their better judgment and repopulated the species on their own.
Every single "if only" chain of logic led back to the same outcome: they would be living in a different, more cheerful world as one happy family.
Their grown children would swing by to visit, their daughters would still love them to pieces, and Cobalt would still be alive.
That was a reality they had destroyed seven years ago, and now they were forever imprisoned in another that perpetually grim and forlorn. They had ruined their family beyond repair, and in the process, had done the same thing to themselves.
There are some injuries that even time cannot heal...
A/N: I can't believe this story is finally over! It took me way longer to finish than I first expected it would. I've come to the conclusion that the complex plot is to blame.
Sorry if this chapter seemed rushed, I was dealing with a lack of motivation and an urge to begin another tale for Rio.
Anyways, this tragic piece comes to a close. Many thanks to SKS for sharing his idea. I hope you were pleased with the execution and outcome of this work.
Well, I better wrap up this author's note, before it turns into a rant.
Don't forget to review!